"Best friend competition?" Sasuke read aloud from the pamphlet he held that he had received from Naruto.
Naruto nodded.
It was after school on Thursday, and they hadn't much to do. But it seemed that very day a type of festivity would be starting—in five minutes, across town.
"Why should we go there?" Sasuke asked, reading carefully.
It read, in the summary: Do you want to see which of your best friends is the better? This unofficial contest will be held at 4:30 on Thursday afternoon. A person can select a group of friends to compete for his or her favor.
And then they can kill them, Jeffrey added mentally.
Easy way to find out which of your friends to kill, Sasuke, Itachi noted.
Oh, shut up, Sasuke mumbled in his head.
"You guys can finally have the fight of your lives to see which one gets to be my bestest friend!" Naruto laughed, dancing around with the pamphlet.
"I'll do no such thing," Sasuke exclaimed. "Over my dead body."
That can be arranged.
Oh, come on, Sasuke. You'll totally win the hairstylist contest!
I'm not gay!
What does hairstyling have to do with gayness? Can't a man like hairstyles as well?
Jeffrey used to have his own salon back in Nam, Itachi explained.
Why, Mother? The voice moaned. I was just trying to fulfill my dreams!
You know what, Sasuke thought. I hope you voices are real. Because my mind thinking up that ridiculous story is worse than having voices in my head!
Naruto pouted. "Fine, Sasuke. Then you'll just have to fight over me with Gaara, a full-scale battle."
Run, white boy!
Gaara shook his head. "No, no. That won't do." Gaara sighed and thought. "I'd like to participate…but…"
"Let's fight it for Gaara," Sasuke suggested. "You and me. You want to see if you're better than me, right, Naruto? Here's your chance."
Gaara brightened at the thought. But Naruto pouted. "But, Sasuke, you'll be uncertain the rest of your life if you're the best friend I could have."
Nah, he'll find out right after you die.
Come on, Sasuke, kill him. He's so annoying. Foxy boy.
I do not think of Naruto that way!
Er…that's not what I meant…
"Yeah, yeah, boo hoo," Sasuke muttered. "Come on, let's hurry up. We got, like, a minute."
"Want to get there really fast?" Gaara asked ominously.
"Wha-what do you mean?" Sasuke stammered.
Will we ride your demon's back?
Yes, free Willie!
Ugh…ew, I have no comeback for that.
How about, "I hope it's big!" Then again, anything is bigger than yours…
Damn straight. One time, when we were changing into our bathing suits to swim at the ocean with Mother and Father, I caught a glimpse.
No way! What did you see?!
Nothing! There was nothing there!
Itachi! You swore you wouldn't tell!
"I mean, with my sand, I can get us there like that," he said, snapping his fingers.
"But people will see!" Naruto objected.
"No, we'll take back roads," Gaara assured him. "And we won't make it if we don't. Let's go."
So, with that, Gaara summoned upon his mighty demon powers to command the sand and dirt from beneath their feet to come together and form a small platform to which they sat upon.
"Let's go, Bessie!" Naruto called to the wind.
Gaara and Sasuke stared.
"Sorry. Impulse. Now, go!"
-
They arrived a few minutes late at a field outside Konoha. It was beautiful, and the sun was slowly lowering in the sky, giving the field an orange glow.
Sasuke picked up a schedule after registering them at the large desk set up on the side of the field. He read aloud: "'The chosen friend will sit as a judge. He will decide which of his friends is the one to gain the point for that round. There will be five rounds, and the one with the most rounds by the end wins.'"
As Sasuke and Naruto prepped themselves for this battle of their friend abilities, a certain annoying, no-life, weird-ass Kazekage looked on within the darkness of the trees.
"They have no idea that I set up this entire thing," the man chuckled darkly to himself. "Yes, I was the one who left the pamphlet for Naruto to find. My men are now hosting this entire scene! They will make it impossible for them to win! There will be controversy within their group and they will ultimately split up! Muahaha!"
"Did Dad get his medicine today?" Temari asked Kankuro.
"I hope so. I didn't dip it into the toilet for nothing, did I?"
"Maybe that's why he's acting so weird, Kankuro."
"Temari, don't you remember the time before he got those pills? A certain 'misunderstanding' between our father and a certain 'candy cane'?"
"Ugh. Don't remind me."
-
What the heck? A candy cane? I do NOT want to know! Also, I referred to Nam during this chapter, which, if you're not up to speed, is short for "Vietnam" as in, being there during the war and such. It doesn't make sense, but what does in this story? And I thought it sounded cool. I hoped you enjoyed this installment. The second half of Thursday will be here shortly. Thank you!