Hello, lovely readers!
Bit of a tense one last time out. Our girl finally got her chat with Randy and it wasn't a pretty one. You know me – I love the drama! So now we get the aftermath of that conversation, so don't forget to favourite, follow and review.
Raquel the writer – This story is under the drama category, so who knows!
Debwood-1999 – Jealousy can be a very ugly thing and I think that's proven here. Perhaps he should have told her sooner and all this could have been avoided, but regardless he should not have lashed out like he did. Holly is seeing another side of her friend ad it's not one she likes.
Dutchangel1979 – It does suck for her, but yes, at least she knows the truth now… even if it's a hard truth
Seth Rollins babe – Thank you!
Beautifultragedyxxx – So did I. The Randy and Holly scenes were some of my favourite to write. But this is what happens when jealousy appears.
Ambrose-kohli-girl – I know! I'm the same, I just want to give that girl a hug. I do throw a lot of problems at her lol
Shadowfox87 – Exactly. He was so important to her and he meant more to her than he'll ever know. But it's all ruined now and I'm unsure of whether a friendship could ever work for them again.
Guest – Yep. It was probably the hardest thing for Holly to do in this story so far, especially since Randy was such a big part of her life.
DenyingTheTruth – Ah, thank you! It's a lovely compliment to take. I hope you continue to enjoy this story
LunaticGirl808 – Jealousy has taken over and turned him into a bit of an idiot really
Tantoune – He still likes her, but she doesn't like him. The attempted kiss was like his last ditch attempt at getting her back… and that majorly backfired! But at least Holly stood up for herself. It's going to hurt but she has to put her and Dean first now.
DeeMarie426 – Your review sums it up perfectly. Randy is a total dumbass!
This chapter is named after 'Friction' by Imagine Dragons
Holly Helmsley's Point Of View
I was hardly sure how I got back home that afternoon. It was like I was a zombie, moving on auto-pilot, only realising I was at Hunter's home as soon as I walked up the driveway.
It was hard to know how to feel after having such a discussion with your so called friend, and it was hard to know how to react. But that's because there were so many reactions I wanted to have.
I wanted to lash out at him. I was so fucking angry and fuming that, even though I had zero wrestling skills, I wanted to get into a ring and beat the shit out of him until he was unmoving on the floor. I wanted to hit him, I wanted to hurt him, I wanted him to pay for what he'd put me through, what he'd put Dean through.
How dare he do what he did out of jealousy! Dean had done nothing wrong, and it had been my choice to be with him and reject Randy. If he had a problem or an issue with my decision, he should have come to me and we could have talked it out. We were best friends, we were hardly strangers, so I would have gladly sat down with him and got everything out on the table.
But no. He'd been an absolute pig and taken all his anger and frustration out on an innocent man in a violent way. A man who had done nothing wrong, a man who was only guilty of falling for me.
When Dean found out about Randy kissing me, he had wanted to hurt him, sure. But he hadn't. He'd done the decent thing, he'd left things alone, he knew he wasn't involved and so left Randy and I to it. But when things were the other way round, when the shoe was on the other foot, Randy hadn't.
If Dean and I were together, it was none of Randy's business, same as it would have been none of Dean's business if Randy and I had tried to be together after his kiss.
I had never seen this vile side of my friend before, and it got me mad beyond compare. He showed his true colours, he hurt and attacked someone who he had no business of approaching. This wasn't Dean's fault and it never would be. I fell for him and that was that. It was something Randy had to understand and accept.
At the end of the day, it was always going to be Dean. Whether Randy had admitted his feelings four years ago when he got them or even as early as yesterday, my decision would always have been the same. I never saw Randy in that light and I never would. He was my best friend and that's all he ever would be.
But that brought me to my other reaction… pure and unadulterated sadness.
I just wanted to drop to the floor and cry my heart out until literally no more tears could fall.
I'd lost him. My best friend was gone. It felt as if over half my life befriending him had been a total waste and now it had all fallen down the drain. Whatever friendship we had, it was gone now, and I knew it would be almost impossible to get back.
There was no way we could come back from this. He'd attacked the man I was with for jealous and selfish reasons, he'd ruined everything we'd worked towards at work as The Authority, he broken my trust, and when I was at my lowest and most vulnerable he'd tried to kiss me again, knowing I was with someone, knowing it was the last thing I'd want.
I never thought this would ever happen to us. Not when I met him aged 13. Not when I grew up knowing him. Not when I left for college. Not when I came home and worked for WWE with him. Not as we grew closer, the man becoming my best friend in the whole wide world.
But all that was gone now, it was all in the past. It never had to be this way, it could have been so much easier. I never dreamt Randy and I would end up this way. Not once.
Yet we had, our friendship was no more, and the heartbreak that brought was painful beyond belief. It killed that we wouldn't see each other everyday. It killed that we wouldn't hang out anymore or laugh together. No more going to dinner, no more movie nights, no more travelling to the arena together. I'd never be able to come to him for advice or comfort again, I'd never have his shoulder to cry on. I'd never have that security blanket that Randy provided for me.
It was all gone.
My mind was in two ways to feel, both anger and sadness fighting for dominance. Yet one thing covered both emotions.
Hurt.
How much all of this inexplicably hurt. And I wasn't sure when it would stop hurting… if ever.
This was the way life had to be now, a place without Randy, a place with one less friend in it. It was going to completely change my life but it was a future I'd have to accept.
I walked lazily up the driveway to Hunter's house, knowing I'd have to tell him I'd seen Randy. It wouldn't be fair to lie, firstly because of the sensitive situation, and secondly if Hunter ever got wind that I'd seen Randy and I hadn't told him, he wouldn't be happy. I couldn't exactly explain the truth and tell him Randy had admitted why he had attacked Dean, but I'd scout around the truth as best as I could without giving the game away.
So I pulled out the spare key Steph had given me and let myself inside.
"I'm home," I shouted once I'd closed the door. Delicious smells filtered through the house so I knew Steph was cooking dinner before the Smackdown taping.
"In the kitchen," I heard her say, so I followed her voice, finding Hunter in there with her, pouring drinks.
"You want wine with dinner?" he asked me as he continued to pour the bottle into glasses.
"Uh, sure…whatever," I said with a shrug, not really giving a shit in the moment. I wasn't exactly in the mood for pleasantries.
Hunter looked up at the sound of my voice, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion.
"What's wrong?" he asked, putting the bottle down. "You don't sound good. Your face in pale too."
I hadn't even realised how bad my outward appearance would be, but Hunter could see there was an issue. At the sound of his words, Stephanie stopped her dinner prep and looked me over, her maternal caring instinct hitting her as she approached me.
"What's wrong, sweetheart?" she asked, tenderly rubbing my arm.
I looked between them, my heart thumping nervously in my chest. I could feel my rapid pulse in my neck as worry and anxiety hit me, making it a little harder to breathe. My lungs would be working overtime during this conversation, but it was one I needed to have.
"I bumped into Randy today…" I admitted.
Hunter's face changed instantly, morphing from one of concern into one of shock with a hint of anger.
"Where?" he asked.
"Murphy's bar," I said.
"I'll be back in an hour," he said, grabbing his car keys, ready to leave the house.
"He won't be there," I said, causing him to stop and face me. "It was about an hour ago and I don't think he'll have hung around. He'll be long gone by now."
Hunter walked slowly over to us again, putting his keys back down.
"Well what happened?" he asked. "What did he say to you?"
"He didn't say much," I explained. "But I think he knows he fucked up."
"Did he say where he's been this whole time?" Steph asked.
"No, he didn't mention anything."
Hunter took a seat and I knew he was trying to keep calm. He'd be angry with Randy but my brother would want to talk to him before he lashed out. There was a lot of history between Hunter and Randy, both in and out of the ring. Until he'd spoken to Randy in person, he wouldn't do anything negative or life changing.
"Well did he explain his actions on Raw?" he asked. "Why he RKO'd Ambrose like he did?"
I swallowed nervously, hesitating briefly before I spoke.
"No," I lied. "He didn't mention anything."
He shook his head. "I don't understand any of it," he said. "Why would he do that? Randy has never been like this before. And to not show up for his match like that… Has he ever mentioned to you a problem with Ambrose before? I know the two aren't exactly the best of friends, but I've never thought the issue so bad that he had to attack him like that."
"No," I lied again. "He never said anything. And I doubt he'll be at Smackdown tonight."
Hunter rubbed his hands over his face. "Well the show has to go on as scheduled. We can't stop it just because of this. We'll concentrate on that for now and deal with the Randy situation when we get home." He looked up at me. "How did he look when you saw him?" His voice was filled with concern.
"He's seen better days," I explained. "And he was drinking a lot. He had three or four glasses of brandy whilst I was there."
"And he didn't explain anything or open up to you?" he asked again, just making sure.
I hated lying to my brother, but for now I had to.
"No," I said. "He said nothing."
I didn't want to lie about this. It was lying that had gone me in this mess in the first place. But if Randy reacted like this to Dean and I, lord knows what Hunter would do. It was best for everyone if I kept this quiet until the dust settled and everything was smoothed over.
Until then I would have to continue the lie.
I'd never felt more like an Authority member in all my life.
xXx
Smackdown went without a hitch, even with everyone questioning Randy's actions from the previous night. Dean did not fight but he was out to support his brother's as usual. I barely had a moment to see him due to the crazy schedule of the show, but I went straight home with Hunter and Stephanie afterwards, not wanting them to detect anything out of the ordinary by my constant need to sleep away from their home.
I took myself straight up to bed once we got back, both my body and mind totally exhausted. I didn't want to face anymore questioning, I didn't want to have to face my brother or sister-in-law. I just wanted to lie down, go to sleep, and forget this whole afternoon had happened.
The day had started off so well with Dean and I in bed. How had it turned so bad so quickly?
I swiftly changed into my pajamas before getting into bed, snuggling cosily under the covers, ready for sleep to over take me.
I felt my brain shutting down, my eyes drifting closed, almost ready to doze off when my phone began to ring. I yawned, my arm slipping out of the warm cocoon my quilt had created around me in order to retrieve it.
I held it up to my ear. "Hello?"
"You at your brother's house?" Dean's voice asked on the other end of the line. I was surprised to hear from him.
"Oh, hi," I said, unable to hide the smile from my voice. "Yeah. I'm here. But I'm in bed."
"Which bedroom you in?" he asked.
Why is he asking that?
"Erm… 2nd floor. Far right bedroom," I said, a hint of confusion in my voice.
"Perfect. See you in a second."
"Wait… What?" I asked, but he'd already hung up.
Within seconds I heard movement outside, my body sitting up as my eyes darted to the massive window in the bedroom. Almost instantly, his head popped up outside the window. I jumped out of bed and ran over to him.
"What the hell are you doing?" I asked as I opened the window to allow him to climb inside.
"Coming for a little nightime visit," he said as if it was obvious. "Thank god it was this bedroom. I was able to climb the drain pipe."
"How are you…" my voice trailed off as I looked at him in astonishment. I couldn't believe he was here in my brother's fucking house, never mind the fact that he'd climbed the drainpipe to get here! It was great but totally crazy.
"You should know by now, I'm full of surprises, sweetheart," he said as he took his jacket off, throwing it aside and seating himself on the bed.
"As great as it is to see you, you can't be here," I told him. "If Hunter catches you he will hit the roof."
"Well I better not get caught then," he smirked with a wink.
As dangerous as it was, I knew it was a good job he was here. A lot had happened today and I needed to update Dean on everything that had gone on. He needed to know I'd seen Randy and where my friendship with The Viper was going from here.
I couldn't help but smile at the man in front of me. "You are playing with fire, Dean Ambrose." I walked over to him.
"I like to live dangerously," he said, pulling me into his lap, placing a sweet kiss on my lips. "Besides, after how we spent our morning, they'll have to chain me up to keep me away."
I blushed lightly, biting my lip as memories of the morning flooded through my mind. The way he kissed me, the way he touched me, the magic he created with his fingers…
"And that blush tells me you liked it to," he teased, his arms tightening around me.
"A girl could definitely get used to mornings like those," I said.
"Well I'm a man who likes to oblige and fulfill and beautiful woman's wishes," he said.
I raised an eyebrow. "What if I have wishes right now?"
His eyes darkened a little, his tongue darting out to lick his lips. "Then tell me what they are and I'll see what I can do."
I looked at him, gently pressing forward until our lips touched. I pressed mine against his lightly before pulling back but Dean wasn't having any of it. No sooner had my lips left his did he pounce, laying me quickly down on the bed and kissing me ravishingly. He slipped his tongue into my mouth, tangling with my own, letting me taste him. My hands ran up his chest before wrapping around his neck, pulling him even closer.
I loved it when he kissed me like this. it was always so passionate and sensual, turning me on so much that I got to the point where I simply wanted him to rip my clothes off and have his wicked way with me.
"This," I said breathlessly when he pulled back for air. "I want this…"
"With pleasure," he growled as he latched his lips to mine again. His hand grabbed my thigh, wrapping my leg around his waist in order to pull me closer to him, his erection evident beneath his jeans.
I felt the familiar coil tightening in my stomach and I knew kissing would not be enough for me. Now I knew what he was capable of, I needed so much more than just a make out session. I needed him to touch me, I needed him to make me feel good…
A knock suddenly sounded at my door.
"Shit," I whispered, Dean quickly jumping off me as panic overtook us. We could not be found out.
"Holly, can I come in?" Stephanie asked from behind the door.
"Just a second!" I called, straightening myself out. "I'm just… getting changed!"
Dean quickly grabbed his coat, looking around for a place to hide.
"Under the bed," I whispered. "And keep quiet."
Dean nodded, rolling under the bed, staying as silent as possible. Once I knew the coast was clear, I jumped into bed, pulled the covers over me and told Steph it was okay to come in. She entered the room, a sweet smile on her face.
"Hey. I just wanted to see how you were," she said, closing the door behind her. "You've been quiet all evening." She took a seat on my bed.
"Oh I'm fine," I assured her. "Just a little tired."
"I know the afternoon's events will have taken its toll on you," she said. "They would have upset any of us."
Oh shit…
She was going to talk about Randy. She was going to discuss what had happened and I hadn't even had chance to speak to Dean about it yet…
"Honestly," I said, trying to convince her that we didn't need to have this discussion. "It's all good. I'll be myself by morning. There's nothing to worry about."
"We can't help but be worried, Holly," she said. "Hunter and I both knew how close you and Randy were. Seeing him today can't have been easy."
Ffuucckk…
The cat was out of the bag.
"It wasn't easy," I said, knowing there was no way back now. Dean would have heard. "After what happened, it was never going to be easy."
"Did he say anything to you?" she asked me softly. "I felt like Hunter was giving you the third degree earlier and I just wanted to ask you in a calmer environment."
"No," I lied. "He just seemed a little sorry for himself. He apologised but that was it."
Steph shook her head sadly. "Hunter has been calling him all evening, trying to get through to him but he's had no luck."
"He didn't seem in the mood to talk this afternoon, so I'm not surprised."
"And he gave you no explanation as to why he attacked Ambrose?" she asked.
"Nothing," I said. "I asked and he wouldn't say."
She let out a sigh. "It's so unlike him to be like that. He tells Hunter everything. He's always told you everything. We're just worried."
"He'll be fine," I assured her. "Randy is a grown man and he's not stupid. He'll take care of himself and come back when he's ready."
"I hope so," she said as she stood up. "I just wanted to make sure you were alright anyway."
"I'm good," I said, offering her a smile. "I just want to sleep and wake up to a new day."
"Alright," she said walking over to the door. "Sleep well. Love you."
"Love you too, Steph," I said as she left the room and closed the door.
A heavy silence encased the room.
I swallowed nervously, knowing Dean and I would need to talk about this. Whatever sexual energy that had been between us before the interruption was sure to have gone now.
"You can come out now…" I said.
Eventually he rolled out from under the bed, standing up slowly before looking at me. His face was blank, giving very little away.
"Why didn't you tell me you'd seen Randy today?" he asked, his voice stern. He didn't sound happy.
"Because Steph came in before I could," I said.
"I saw you at the arena earlier," he said. "You could have mentioned it then."
"I needed to sit down with you for this one," I explained, hoping he wasn't too mad. "This isn't the sort of conversation that we can have fleetingly at work."
He sat on my bed, running a hand through his hair.
"What happened then…?" he asked. "When did you see him?"
"This afternoon at a bar in town," I explained. "I went in to get some change and saw him sitting there."
"And after that?" he asked. "What did the bastard have to say for himself?"
"We spoke, got everything off our chests," I began. "He explained his actions… told me why he did it… he tried to kiss me… and I-"
"He fucking what?" he asked, his head shooting to look at me, anger and venom in his eyes. His body had stiffened, his hands balled up into fists.
"It doesn't matter," I said.
"Yes it fucking does!" he said in annoyance. "What the fuck is he playing at?"
"I pushed him back and told him no, so it's over and done with," I said, wishing I hadn't mentioned it in the first place. "I was more concerned over what he said than what he did anyway."
His body relaxed a little. "What did he say?"
"He attacked you because of jealousy," I told him. "He admitted he attacked you because he was jealous that I had chosen you. And since he couldn't go for me, you were the next best thing."
"He's more of a scumbag than I thought," he said to himself, running his hand through his hair to brush it away from his face. He looked away from me, clearly deep in thought and I wished I could read minds in that moment.
The one worry I had with telling Dean what happened this afternoon was what his reaction would be. Dean was unstable at the best of times, and the last thing I wanted was for the lunatic to show up and make matters worse. So for his sake and mine, I hoped he could restrain him and not let him out.
I leant forward and gently laid my hand on top of his.
"What are you thinking?" I asked him.
"How much I wanna kill him," he said. "How much I wanna lash out… How glad I am that I don't know where he is because if I did I'd go right to him and I wouldn't leave him alive. You have no idea how hard it is to keep calm right now."
"I know," I said, rubbing the back of his hand with my thumb. "But if you get mad, that isn't going to help anyone. I spoke to him today, we got a lot off our chests and you don't have to worry about him anymore."
"But he attacked me," he said, looking into my eyes. "He wanted to attack you. The prick even tried to kiss you after everything. I want to rip him limb from fucking limb."
"I know that's your attempt at gallantry, but he knows how I feel. He knows how mad I am, and he knows I don't give a damn anymore."
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"I'm done with him, Dean," I said. "How can I be friends with someone so negative, so volatile, so wrong? He sought revenge out of jealousy, he hurt an innocent man, and he hurt me in more ways than he could ever imagine. I don't want anything to do with a person like that."
"Holly… he was your best friend," said Dean. "You've known him over half your life. That's a lot to give up."
I couldn't help but be touched by his words. Even through everything, through the hatred, the hurt, the betrayal, Dean was still fighting to allow Randy and I to maintain our friendship. Even though Randy had wronged him in so many ways, he knew how close we had been and how he never wanted to come between that.
And once upon a time, Randy had been one of the most important people in my life. But times had changed and my priorities had changed. I found someone who meant even more to be now and he was what was important.
"It's harder to see what he did to you," I said, giving his hand a tight squeeze. "And you mean more to me than anything, even Randy Orton. I'm not playing his childish games. If he wants to lash out and react like that then I want no part of it or him."
He gave me a soft smile, gently raising his hand to cup my cheek. I closed my eyes, leaning into his touch as he brushed his thumb over the skin.
"I hit the fucking jackpot when I found you," he said. "Did you know that?"
"We both did," I replied as he pulled me to him, encasing me in his big strong arms. I rested my head on his chest and I relaxed into his hold, enjoying the gentle lull of his heartbeat below my ear.
"I know it must have been so hard to walk away from him," he said to me. "So I'll make sure to spend everyday proving to you that you made the right choice being with me. I'll kiss you, hold you, treat you like a fucking queen. 12 years compared to a few months is a big sacrifice, Holly. You're my number one priority and nothing will change that."
I sighed in contentment, knowing I'd made the right choice. After I'd told Randy we couldn't be a couple, he'd wanted to hurt me. He'd wanted to make me pay. And since he couldn't, he'd lashed out at Dean instead. I knew Dean would never do that to me. He'd never hurt me either physically or mentally. He always had my best interests at heart and he always would.
There wasn't no maybe or in between or perhaps.
I had made the right choice.
Dean was what I needed right now, Dean was what made me happy and content.
And as I lay beside him that night, wrapped up safely in his arms, I knew he would always be my choice.
He was special. He was important. He was mine.
Again, a huge thanks to Raquel the writer, Debwood-1999, dutchangel1979, Seth Rollins babe, beautifultragedyxxx, ambrose-kohli-girl, shadowfox78, DenyingTheTruth, LunaticGirl808, Tantoune, DeeMarie426 and my guest reviewer for their kind words.