This was a bad idea. A terrible idea. The worst idea ever. Absolutely. This had been a bad idea from the start and Ivan knew it. But it was only now just hitting him. A tragedy, really.

If it took Ivan being on the back of a stolen motorcycle, shouting directions to the worst criminal in history while clinging to his back to get him to question his life choices…well, Ivan's sanity wasn't looking very good. And yet he had allowed Alfred to convince him to bring it back after they were done, completely unharmed.

This was a very bad idea…

Alfred laughed over the engine as they stopped in the parking garage. He looked back at Ivan with a devilish smirk. Ivan just rolled his eyes, getting off as quickly as possible. A part of him felt a horrible pit in his stomach at even the thought of touching the Dictator like that, knew he was bad news. And...strangely another part of him kind of enjoyed the thrill. That part noticed the jolts of electricity that came from touching Alfred's skin. But he chose to largely ignore that part of him.

"Come on, have a little fun, this is fun!" Alfred laughed, lightly punching Ivan's shoulder.

"We aren't staying for long," Ivan said stiffly as he turned to deactivate the bike. It was powered by magic, the wheels made of magic. Normally, it didn't turn on, except to a certain magic signature, that of its owner. But Ivan had more than enough magic to…well…break into it. And use his own magic.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Alfred rolled his eyes before turning them to the building ahead of them. "So what's this place like? Anything like markets?"

"Way more lively, if I'm not mistaken," Ivan said simply, walking with him. He looked down at the ground as they walked and frowned when he realized that there were quite a lot of rocks and pebbles around to step on. He glanced back at Alfred, his bare feet. They were already dirty before this, but he didn't even seem to be affected by the pain. "Doesn't it hurt?" Ivan tried asking.

"What?" Alfred asked.

"Your bare feet," Ivan turned forward.

"Eh, you get used to it when you never wear shoes," Alfred shrugged. "Besides, I don't feel pain anyway."

"You don't?" Ivan asked curiously.

"It's a thing with my immortality," Alfred said. "You saw it when they tried to shoot me. I guess it's…like a shield? Nothing can hurt me or even touch me. It…sounds awesome when you put it like that."

"The way you say that, sounds like there's a drawback," Ivan said as they neared one of the many openings to the mall. He couldn't believe he was doing this…Still, Alfred's clothing did make him stand out a little. Ivan might be forced to buy him clothes so they don't draw attention… At the very least, shoes were required to even enter stores…

"A few," Alfred said. "My sleep schedule is one of them. This requires a lot of energy on my part and if I don't sleep 12 hours a day and eat enough, then it would start eating me from the inside out. The food you guys have been giving me is barely enough, luckily my body just naturally sleeps as a means of protection. So I don't die because of my own stupidity. Both good and bad."

"Well, if you're asleep, it's not like anyone can hurt you," Ivan shrugged. The doors slid open for them and he only just briefly thought to mask Alfred's aura. It was black, after all and he hoped no one outside paid it any mind. He decided on blue, it didn't look half bad on him, like that could have been his aura before this all happened.

"Not physically, anyway," Alfred mused.

Ivan frowned at that statement, but didn't say anything. He glanced around, it was fairly busy, all considering. People mulled around, going on with their lives. Laughing and talking with friends or rushing with children to get to the correct store for a sale…all without the knowledge that The Dictator was walking among them.

"First thing's first, we need to get you shoes," Ivan said.

"Fun," Alfred chirped.

"Don't get too excited, I'll keep them after we go back," Ivan said.

"Do I get clothes, too?" Alfred smirked. "You know, I need to blend in and stuff, right?"

"Don't press your luck," Ivan scowled.

"Come on, just give me the mall experience," Alfred groaned. "Let me get shoes and clothes and then we can go back. All I need, promise. You can take everything when we go back."

"Swear we're going back after this?" Ivan asked. "I'm basically already fired."

"No one's gonna know," Alfred sighed. "We'll get back before your backup comes and everything will be like normal. One more secret on the pile shouldn't mean much to you anyway."

"What is that supposed to mean?" Ivan scoffed, but started towards the nearest shoe shop. Luckily he was already at school on a free ride and he had a job to pay for this. He hadn't actually been shopping, let alone in a mall, in quite some time. If he allowed himself, this could actually be fun.

"You don't even seem to give a shit when it comes to keeping secrets," Alfred smiled. "Even big secrets like The Dictator waking up on your shift. Anyone asking why you know so much yet?"

"No," Ivan said. "And as long as you don't tell anyone, either, we should be fine."

"I don't exactly have a lot of incentive to do that, do I?" Alfred hummed. Ivan scoffed as they entered the store and Ivan looked around. Just something simple, something that preferably didn't cost a lot. "How about this? Give me a good time and I won't tell anyone."

"Fine," Ivan sighed. "Now pick some shoes so we can leave."

About fifteen minutes later, Alfred was perfectly satisfied with a pair of sneakers, some jeans, a T-shirt and jacket. In fact, he was beaming.

He looked like he was about to head where the sign indicated the food court, but Ivan held him back by his collar.

"Your promise?" Ivan raised a brow. He didn't like staying here for very long. What if someone had come in to check on them? That would be very, very bad for Ivan. He was already on edge about this whole idea.

"Come on, just some food?" Alfred begged and Ivan shook his head. "You know, your outlook on this hasn't changed a whole lot since we got here," Alfred pouted.

"My apologies," Ivan said bluntly.

"Look, I'm doing this to prove that there's nothing to be afraid of with me," Alfred said. "I got to stretch my legs, and I promise I won't hurt anyone. Not even while I'm using Dark Magic, if I use it. I swear." There was something in Alfred's eyes that told Ivan that Alfred wasn't just doing this to prove that to Ivan…it was almost like he wanted to prove it to himself, too.

"If I say I believe you, will you come back?" Ivan asked.

"Hey, Ivan!" he froze at the sound of Feliks' voice, but definitely didn't miss Alfred's smile. "Didn't peg you as the mall type!" Feliks laughed as he walked up to him, patting his back. "Who's your friend?" he nodded to Alfred.

"Feliks, don't be so quick to run off," Toris sighed as he ran up to them and Ivan finally turned to acknowledge them. Better he talk to them than Alfred.

"My friend convinced me to come," Ivan said. "This is Alfred."

"And here I was worried about you getting the hots for The Dictator," Feliks laughed, taking hold of Alfred's hand to shake it.

"Yeah?" Alfred laughed, smirking at Ivan, who just glared at him.

"Feliks," Toris sighed.

"It's fine," Ivan sighed. "He knows about my work."

"Good," Toris nodded before turning to Alfred. "My name is Toris, nice to meet you, and you've already met Feliks."

"You guys're friends with Ivan?" Alfred asked. "Didn't peg him as the guy to make friends."

"I have friends," Ivan said pointedly.

"Well, there's like, 6 of us," Feliks laughed. "Seven now, but we can stay at six if we don't count your sister."

"Hey, we were just headed to the food court, mind coming with us?" Alfred asked and Ivan felt himself twitch. Of course he would, wouldn't he?

"Actually, I have to go soon," Ivan pressed.

"Aw, don't be such a downer," Feliks groaned. "I'm sure you can spare a few minutes eating some overpriced food, right?"

"Yeah, Ivan, can't you?" Alfred smirked.

"I-I don't think we should pressure him," Toris interjected.

"Well, I'll stay, whether or not you do," Alfred shrugged. "I'll just take the bus back home."

"Let's go," Ivan sighed, walking towards the food court. Alfred let out a whoop before excitedly following him, chatting it up with Feliks while he was at it. In no time, Alfred was satisfied with a whole plate of food, of course purchased with Ivan's money. They found a table among the crowd and Alfred excitedly looked on at the crowd, smiling at everyone he could see. He was like a kid in a candy store at this rate. He was practically vibrating, he was so happy.

"So, how'd Ivan even meet you?" Feliks asked conversationally as Ivan pushed around his food with a fork. He knew where this was going. Usually, Feliks was shy around new people, but when he had his friends right next to him, he had all of the confidence in the world. "As big and scary as he looks, he's pretty awkward around new people."

"Oh, yeah, I got that vibe when I first met him," Alfred smirked.

"Yes, because you were extremely eloquent when we met, too," Ivan bit back.

"I was the definitely eloquent," Alfred supplied.

"Damn, that sexual tension is strong!" Feliks laughed and Ivan blushed, staring at his food.

"No, no, no, that's totally not what this is," Alfred said quickly, curiously enough. Ivan would have figured he would milk that just like everything else. Then again…maybe this had something to do with Amelia…

"Sure," Feliks snorted.

"They could just be friends," Toris shrugged.

"We have only known each other for a few weeks," Ivan said simply, taking a small bite of food. They really would have to leave soon. Alfred should know that too.

"Ivan!"

This time the voice was even more unexpected and roughly a million times more terrifying. Ivan met Alfred's wide-eyed stare.

"Arthur," Alfred muttered.

"Huh?" Feliks asked, looking towards the member of the board, who was walking right towards them irately.

"Shit," Alfred cursed before standing up.

"Wait, isn't that Arthur from the board at the Center?" Toris asked, wide-eyed. "What's he doing here?"

Ivan had no idea how to lie about this one as he stood up. Arthur stopped a fair distance away from them, obviously not wanting to talk in front of civilians. Ivan had a terrible feeling about this.

Alfred, however, was quick to lie. "He's my dad," he blurted out and Ivan flinched. Really? "I snuck out, totally my fault. C'mon Ivan, let's go talk to him." Ivan could ignore for now all of the loopholes that came with that lie.

"Dating the boss's kid, huh?" Feliks smirked as they walked away.

"It's really not like that!" Alfred shot back. In no time, they were in front of Arthur, who refused to take his eyes away from Alfred, like he was afraid of him attacking.

"What the hell is the meaning of this?" Arthur snapped. "Ivan, this wasn't even your shift and yet you're out here with him? Around civilians?"

"I…" Ivan shook his head. He couldn't explain this. He had no way out of this one.

"Calm down, old man, okay?" Alfred scoffed. "It was my idea. I forced him to do it."

"That doesn't change anything," Arthur hissed. He looked around, almost in a panic. There was literally nothing he could do around this many people or he could start a panic. And if Alfred fought back, which Ivan doubted, that would cause a lot of problems for them.

"Well, shit happens," Alfred said pointedly. "At least this proves how fucking stupid it is for you to place me in a cell this whole time."

"Regardless of if you can break out or not, this is a matter of safety," Arthur said pointedly. "And, as far as I'm concerned, a cell is right were you belong, criminal."

"Yeah, can we get over that?" Alfred groaned.

"It doesn't matter," Arthur scoffed. "There are undercover guards in a car outside, you will come with me, understood?"

"You don't have a lot of leverage, old man," Alfred smirked, shaking his head. "But I'll comply."

"And Ivan," Arthur finally turned to look at him. "You're fired."

"What?" Alfred snapped and Arthur flinched. Alfred sighed impatiently, balling his fists but taking a deep breath to center himself. Ivan just blinked in surprise, not quite sure what to say to that. "This was my fault," Alfred said carefully.

"Regardless, he allowed it to happen, he endangered countless civilians, and on today of all days?" Arthur snapped. "Even if you could change my mind, you can't change the minds of everyone else on the board."

"But that's not fair-" Alfred tried but Ivan cut him off.

"It's fine," Ivan said simply. "I understand." He had no right working as a guard of The Dictator if he allowed himself to be persuaded so easily.

"Good," Arthur turned on his heel and started walking. "Alfred."

Alfred set his jaw, glancing at Ivan, but followed him anyway. Ivan sighed. They were going in the opposite direction of where Ivan knew the bus stop was. If he was lucky, he could make it home and just over think about this entire situation there. No big problem. He didn't even look back at his friends as he left.

That night had been strange…by far the strangest night Ivan had been through. With this new free time on his hands, he was able to get through his homework with some time to spare. But he felt exhausted after everything that had happened. So he decided to go straight to bed. The only downside being that, after only a few minutes of lying alone in the dark, he started getting restless.

It was a familiar feeling he'd felt a thousand times before and he usually knew how to fix that feeling. He was getting sexually frustrated, but the part that made him the most frustrated was who was making him feel this way. Because the only image that propped into his brain when he could get friction in just the right place was…

"Alfred," Ivan hissed out and groaned, shoving his face into his pillow. He should just go to sleep. Sleep it off, everything would be just fine if he could just sleep it off. But closing his eyes gave him the clear image of Alfred. Alfred's stupid smile, Alfred's laugh when he knew something no one else did, his excited little hop as he was surrounded by this new culture he didn't know. Alfred leaning over him, his hot breath puffing into Ivan's face as their body heat slid closer and closer.

Ivan groaned, sitting upright and rubbing his face. He was so tired, dammit! Couldn't he just sleep in peace? His brain fed him another image of Alfred, sweat dripping over his face as he carefully traced parts of Ivan's body that begged to be touched.

"F…fuck…" Ivan shook his head and just went ahead to work on his already needy erection. He could deny accusation from his own brain that this even happened later, for now he needed sleep and he had to do this first.

He felt his entire body shudder as he finally came into his own hand and he groaned again at the realization that he'd been too busy with his…problem to find a way to do it without causing a mess. Ivan was far too tired to get new sheets on his bed now.

He snatched his pillow and walked over to his couch. He could sleep there for the night. For now, he needed sleep.

Eheheh, eheh, that awkward moment when you get off to the world's worst dictator. Ivan's had a rough day, hasn't he? Alfred himself gives him enough stress to begin with, but now this much has been piled on? I mean, I don't blame Arthur for firing him, all considering. There's also Alfred's reaction to Feliks basically calling them a couple. He's more than willing to tease Ivan, but when it comes to actually being in a relationship, he's quicker than Ivan to shut it down. How interesting…

Anyway, that's it for now! See you next time!