Welcome Back, Wally
Chapter 2
"ohh… I had the most weirdest dream I got kicked out of my house, my brother knocked up Killer Frost and sold my apartment and I was forced to live with those wacko Justice Leaguers and my bat-crazy wife" Wally said before gasping as he felt a long strand of blonde hair. And next to him was some very familiar brunette hair. Wally's eyes shrank in horror as he realized who his roommates are
"good morning Wally" Kara and Alex said in unison, giggling in devilish delight
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" Flash screamed in horror, running out of the room, hitting his head on the wall
"well morning sleepyhead! We made you breakfast" Hippolyta crooned, making pancakes and eggs
"no, no, no. this is a dream, it's all a dream, hahaha. Yes, I'm not here. I'm… oh, oh no, no, NO" Wally gasped at what he saw; framed on the wall was Wally's adoption papers that read Wally Prince
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO…" Flash bawled dramatically, sobbing
"awww there, there Wally… we'll make you feel better, oh yes we will" Hippolyta said sweetly, smothering Wally with her breasts
"I think Wally needs some medicine. Girls! Can you be Mommy's little helpers and get your new brother some medicine?" Hippolyta asked kindly, Wally squeaking in horror as the twins loomed over him, smiling deviously
"open wide Hehehehehe" Kara giggled insanely as Alex force opened Wally's mouth. Kara cackled like a maniac as she dropped the pills into Wally's mouth, Wally gagging as he swallowed them down
"this… this is a nightmare! I… I…" Wally babbled, cuddling in the fetal position
"awww…" everyone awed, Kara and Alex grinning ear to ear
"Wally! You… get up! My god, what are you, crazy? They're just playing with you! Geez!" Linda grumbled, kicking Wally in the shin as he stumbled up
"Ugh…ighahahahahaaaa" Wally babbled incoherently
"oh dear, I think he needs to be in the padded room for a while" Hush moaned, Kara and Alex bounding a babbling Flash in a straitjacket
"ehehheeeheehee family gone. Family all gone. Mahahahahahahaha" Wally laughed inhumanely as Hush dragged him into the solitary ward
"bye-bye Wally Hehehehehehehe" Kara and Alex giggled insanely, Wally screaming in tongues and babbling nonsense
"oh for God's sakes, Wally, shaddup" Hush hissed, Flash's eyes bugging out of his sockets as he rambled incoherently, giggling like a madman. Getting fed up, Hush took a mallet and clubbed Wally with it repeatedly until he was out cold with a stupid grin on his face
"ugh… I'm starting to think him moving in was a very, very, VERY bad idea" Hush grumbled as he tossed Wally into the padded room and locked the door
"Wally's gone bye-bye. Apparently he's lost both his marbles and his name" Hush moaned in boredom
"go on, we're listening…" Kara said, her and Alex sniggering
"oy…" Hush moaned, rubbing his forehead before speaking
"he says his new name is Mrs. Zambezi" Hush said. That was all it took until everyone in the Watchtower burst into maniacal laughter. Well… except for a certain grumpy old Bat
"Ohhhh man! That's-that's-that's PRICELESS" Alex snickered, laughing maniacally as Kara giggled on the floor in hysterics
"WILL YOU PLEASE STOP LAUGHING? IM TRYING TO SLEEP" Batman hollered, before realizing his mistake
"one, two, three…" Kara counted down
"no…please no, please don't do it…" Batman pleaded
"WE'RE NOT AFRAID OF THE BIG BAD BAT! THE BIG BAD BAT, THE BIG BAD BAT! WE'RE NOT AFRAID OF THE BIG BAD BAT, TRA-LA-LA-LA!" everyone sang, giggling insanely
"I'm outta here" Batman deadpanned, getting in his Batmobile and driving off
"YAAAYYYYYY! WE GET HIS BATCAVE, WE GET HIS BATCAVE, WE GET HIS BATCAVE" Kara and Alex chanted in delight, their maniacal laughter ringing in the very pissed off Dark Knight's ears as he drove down to Central City and angrily knocked on Barry's apartment door
"what the…? Batman?" Barry asked in shock
"your brother has gone catatonic and my so-called "family" is driving me nuts. Until this whole mess is settled, which I highly doubt, I'm staying with you, your wife and your bastard child" Batman grumbled
"welcome to my house, brother" Barry grinned, handing Bruce an ice cold beer
…
"I'm FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" Robin screamed in delight
"what the hell is the matter with YOU?" Black Mask asked
"Batman's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone! Now I can do whatever the hell I want" Robin cheered, taking off his pants, his mask and his uniform
"THAT ISNT QUITE WHAT WE HAD IN MIND" Black Mask thundered as a now insane Robin skipped around the yard in his birthday suit
"oh dear Hera… everyone's lost their minds. Bruce left, Wally's now insane and now my completely cuckoo nieces are redecorating the Batcave into a My Little Pony playroom/bedroom" Black Mask grumbled
…
"Oh my word! Girls, your new playroom is so adorable" Hippolyta gasped in awe
"do you really like it Mommy?" Kara asked
"yes I do, sweetie" Hippolyta said cheerfully before gasping happily at Kara's brand new Batmobile bed
"aww Kara sweetie, it's so adorable. Do you like your bed, buttercup? Do you like your new bed?" Hippolyta asked as Kara got under the covers, giggling as Hippolyta ruffled her hair
"aww my angel…" Hippolyta cooed as Kara sucked her thumb and fell asleep
"awww… such a sweet little girl…" Hippolyta crooned, kissing Kara's cheek as she tucked her in
…
"ah this is the life. No immortal Amazons nagging me, no wimpy nerdy sidekicks, no sissy girls, no big blue boyscout morons bugging the hell out of me, just me and some real men and women" Bruce sighed in relief as he drank an ice cold Michelob while watching UCF with Barry and Caitlin
"hey, your Ma texted you. She said your twin cousins remodeled your Batcave" Barry piped up
"eh, let 'em have their fun" Batman mumbled drunkenly
"you sure? Apparently Kara turned your Batsuit into teddy bear pajamas and turned your Batmobile into a race car bed" Barry went on
"pfft. Who cares? I don't need those psychos. Let 'em go without me. C'mere you're missing a good game" Bruce grumbled, Barry tossing his iPhone aside
"Hehehehehehe I like tea, I like parties, I like Maya Angelou, I don't know who this Wally Prince is, I'm a new me, I'm Mrs. Zambezi" Wally rhymed, giggling like a demented madman as Hush banged his head repeatedly on the wall