Title: "School Project"
Chapter: 3 – Lesson # 1, Boys Can't Get Pregnant
Author: Uke
Rating: T
Pairing(s): Ryo x Edo (Zane x Aster), Manjyome x Shou (Chazz x Syrus), and Johan x Judai (Jesse x Jaden).
Genre: Humor, crack and romance.
A/N: Man, I wrote a lot of fanfiction this week!! I'm getting' good when it comes to that! XD Anyway, I actually felt like writing angst today because I'm not in a very good mood and bad moods really are the best time to write angsty stories. But because I wrote so many other random stories this week and I still have this story to work on I figured I'd do chapter three instead of putting it off. XD In this chapter we shall see how Manjyome and Shou-chan are doing with the kid!! Shou is a bit OOC here, but that's on purpose. This IS a crack story. XD; I hope all of you enjoy it and thank you so much again to all of my lovely reviewers!! Please continue to R&R, and I'll keep trying my best with this story. I hope you like it so far!
Warnings: Shounen-ai (BOY x BOY relationships), sexual themes, cursing, crack, EXTREMELY gay and heterophobic boys, and OOC-ness.
Disclaimer: Guess what?! I OWN YUGIOH GX!! …Nah, just kidding, I still don't.
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"Suki-chan! Suki-chan!" Said Shou in a sing-song happy voice as he lifted the "baby" up in the air, over his head. He giggled, "Suki likes playing with Mommy, doesn't she? Mommy loves Suki-chan…Mommy loves Suki-chan so much…"
Manjyome twitched.
"Does Suki-chan love Mommy? Yes she does!! Suki-chan loves her Mommy so much!"
Manjyome twitched again. Slowly, his patience was slipping…
"What about Daddy? Does Suki-chan love Daddy?" Shou smiled happily and held the mechanical baby's face to his ear as if he was listening to it.
Manjyome stared at Shou with an expression that showed that he was trying his hardest to remain calm and collected.
Shou then giggled and looked up at his boyfriend. "Aaw, look at that! Suki said that she loves you, but thinks you're a jerk." He lifted the mechanical baby into the air again, "That's my girl!! She takes after her Mommy, yes she does…"
Three…two…one…All patience was gone. "SHOU WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING, SHUT UP ALREADY!!!" Shouted Manjyome, standing up from the kitchen chair.
It wasn't the fact that he had to do a project as stupid as this one, no. It wasn't that the damned baby seemed to burst out crying every fifteen minutes. It wasn't even the fact that Manjyome hated this project while Shou seemed to love it so much, making the black-haired boy even MORE annoyed. No…it ticked him off, but Manjyome was able to deal with that.
It was the fact that Shou was sitting here, talking to a plastic DOLL in a baby-voice, giving the OBJECT all of his living attention, and acting like he REALLY just gave birth to Manjyome's child.
That's what drove Manjyome off the wall.
Shou pouted and looked up at his obviously-angered boyfriend. "Don't yell!! You're going to wake Suki up! I just got her to go to sleep!" Manjyome's jaw dropped and stared at Shou, shocked. "Shou, that THING isn't really sleeping, you know that right? You just put a key in its back so it'll stop crying." Shou seemed to completely miss Manjyome's point as he stared at the "baby" in his arms, smiling down at it lovingly. "But that key happened to say 'sleep' on it. So Suki-chan is sleeping!!"
Manjyome twitched yet again and took a deep breath so not to go completely crazy with annoyance again. "You're insane." Was all he said, as he got up, leaving the bluenette alone in the kitchen. Shou pouted as he saw the taller boy leave, "Manjyome-kun!! Wait uppp!!" His voice whined slightly, but Manjyome didn't listen and just continued to leave. It was then that Suki decided that it was the perfect time to start crying again.
"Oh no!" Shou exclaimed, "It's because you didn't want Daddy to leave either, isn't it? Poor Suki-chan…it'll be okay, Mommy will always be here!!" Manjyome heard the smaller teen in the other room and couldn't help but freeze in his steps. Was this ACTUALLY the Shou Marufuji he fell in love with? The cute, sweet, innocent, sensitive, extremely uke, and slightly ditzy boy? Was that person actually the same person sitting there, talking to a plastic mechanical doll as if it could hear him and calling himself Mommy?
Manjyome could only hope this was a bad dream.
No, I'm not going to pay any attention to him when he's like this. Obviously Shou lost his mind and I'm WAAAY too good to deal with something like that! I love him, but…crazy people need their space. Manjyome shook his head as he walked away, bringing himself upstairs to he and Shou's bedroom, sitting on their queen-sized bed.
Meanwhile back downstairs, Shou was still taking care of the mechanical baby as if it was a real child. "Its okay, Suki-chan…go back to sleep, okay?" He used the "burp" key on Suki, and then the "sleep" key right after it, sure enough causing Suki to stop crying. Shou smiled and kissed the "baby" on her forehead, "Goodnight, sweetie…sleep tight, okay?" He then looked up to see an empty room and pouted again, "Now to take care of that father of yours."
Shou walked upstairs and straight into the bedroom, the "baby" safely in his arms. Manjyome looked up and just stared at Shou blankly when he saw him. "What do you want? Are you going to tell me that my 'child' and I need to have quality 'father and daughter' time?" His voice was sarcastic and rude as always.
Shou's large silver eyes narrowed into a slight glare, "And so what if I was!?" He said, angrily. Manjyome glared at the bluenette right back, "That's.Not.My.Child!!" He folded his arms and looked away, slowly getting annoyed again. "That's a mechanical baby that we need to 'take care of' for SCHOOL!! I did NOT in any way use MY sperm to create that THING!!"
Shou looked down sadly and stayed silent when Manjyome said that. Manjyome sighed a sigh of relief and looked at Shou closely, hoping that Shou would finally realize the reality of the situation now. Shou then sighed and smiled up at Manjyome sadly. "Well…I know it's technically not our child but…" Shou stopped, placing the "baby" onto a spare pillow on their bed, gently placing their blanket over it. This single action made Manjyome roll his eyes.
Shou looked back up at Manjyome again, "We're both boys so we'll never be able to have children together. But…to tell you the truth…" Shou blushed slightly and smiled, looking down to the floor, seeming to get a bit shy. "I've always wanted to have a baby! I want to be the mother of YOUR child, Manjyome-kun!!"
Manjyome froze and his jaw nearly dropped. Did he just hear what he thought he heard!? "You…Shou…WHAT!?" Was all he was able to say. Shou just smiled and nodded, "Uh huh, you heard me! I want to have your baby!" Manjyome shook his head, completely shocked. "Shou, what the hell has gotten into you!? Newsflash, you're a BOY!! Boys can't have kids!!!! And I mean…I know we're bi and all, and I'm perfectly fine with being with you…but THAT's where I draw the line. That's just WEIRD!!"
Shou pouted, "It's not weird at all!! Male pregnancy is a beautiful, beautiful thing." Manjyome's eyes widened, "BUT IT'S NOT POSSIBLE!!" He insisted, "BOY'S DON'T HAVE CHILDREN!!! Last I checked, which was last night," He mumbled the second part, "You have a PENIS. You know…BOY parts!? You DON'T give birth!!! And I hate to break it to you, but you can't get pregnant anyway!!!" Shou stared up at him, not fazed at all. "…There's buttbabies." He said simply, "Or I could have a C-Section! It'll all work out!"
Manjyome couldn't believe that Shou was stubborn with this. "It WON'T work out because it's NOT going to happen!!" Shou looked away, "Weirder things have happened, Manjyome-kun. It is possible. And if it is…" Shou suddenly started smiling, his eyes getting starry. "Just think! I could be pregnant RIGHT now!! With your child!!! Isn't that wonderful!?"
Manjyome was now officially creeped out. He slowly started to back away, heading to the door. "…You've lost your mind."
However, Shou didn't notice or listen. He continued standing there happily, obviously dazed with his more-than-strange ideas. "Maybe I should take a pregnancy test!! I wonder when the cravings will start happening…morning sickness won't be any fun, either, but it'll all be worth it in the end!"
That door was looking better and better for Manjyome. He backed up some more.
"I'll have to buy some maternity clothes too…I don't think the ones I have will fit me once I start showing signs that I'm pregnant."
Manjyome backed up even more, unable to get any more disturbed at his little boyfriend.
"Ah, but Manjyome-kun?" Shou suddenly asked looking directly at Manjyome, forcing him to stop inching to his exit. "Will you promise that you'll hold my hand the whole time while I give birth? You know how bad I am with pain and…"
That was the last straw. Manjyome was OUT of there.
Not even trying to sneak away, Manjyome darted for the door as fast as he could. He loved Shou with all of his heart, he couldn't try to deny it, but this was just creepy and well…Manjyome had to draw the line somewhere.
But as he was running away he couldn't help but still hear Shou from the other room, "Aaw…look at that, Suki-chan…Manjyome-kun heard that I was pregnant and now he's leaving me. I'm going to have to be a single parent…" Manjyome stopped running and his face turned completely blank. The boy really thinks he's going to get pregnant.
Manjyome sighed as he stood there, trying to decide what the best thing to do would be. Shou has gone insane, I know that. But…maybe there's still hope. I'm disturbed and officially creeped out by Shou-chan, but…I AM his seme. Semes have to take care of their ukes, right? I need to be there in his time of need…I need to get his mind straightened out… Manjyome nodded to himself and then took a deep breath, walking back into the bedroom.
Shou's eyes lit up when he saw him, "You're back! You're not leaving me?" Manjyome didn't say anything but instead grabbed onto Shou's hand. "You're coming with me. Obviously you never learned about the birds and the bees, and I think you're gender-confused. I'm going to take you to the library and teach you about WHY you can't get pregnant and why you never will."
Shou quickly protested, "But what about Suki-chan!? We have to take her! And what if my water breaks at the library!?" Manjyome froze again and stared at Shou shocked. But quickly he shook it off, reminding himself to stay strong and supportive.
"You're reading too much fanfiction and it's poising your mind. I CAN'T GET YOU PREGNANT!!!"
"We'll see about that!"
-END OF CHAPTER 3-
A/N: Whoo, that was fun to write!! XD Apparently Shou wants to be a mommy, who would've guessed? I kinda had to rush this because I couldn't stay on the computer for too long, I'm sorry in advanced for any mistakes you might've found. I hope that you guys liked this chapter and please stick with me for chapter 4 to see how Johan and Judai are doing with Ruby! But remember kiddies, listen to Manjyome; too much fanfiction is bad and may be harmful to your health. Read at your own risk!!