Disclaimer: I do not own FMA in any way...

I Can't Seem to Explain

The morning was breezy and dark, however there were many people in the market. Most looked to be very poor, not like the first impression I had gotten of Italy out on the streets. For example, a young woman stood in front of me leaning with all her wait on the shopping cart in front of her; A small child who looked to be about three, cried and screamed at the woman, tugging on her long, brown hair. The child sat on her hip, holding on to the woman's green coat for support. She turned to grab something off the shelf in front of her. She had black eyes, with long, dark bags outlining them. Her hair was down to her hips, tied in a lose braid with millions of fly away hair stuck to her face. I watched her push them out of the away bending down to let the crying child stand on his own. I pushed my cart past her, not taking my eyes off the two.

There were many others in the store just like her. It was depressing, so many people at the market led huge, shopping carts in front of them but couldn't afford to fill even of a quarter of the carriage. I felt strange walking around the store with my carriage about half way full, my long blond hair and light skin stuck out in the crowd. Although Ed and I were almost out of money ourselves, we had enough for food. The food here wasn't very expensive, actually very cheap compared to where the three of us used to shop back in Germany.

It was around nine in the morning, and I had just woken up Ed enough to tell him I was running out to go food shopping. I remember slipping a pair of Ed's baggy, black sweats on, grabbing my hair into a high pony tail, and touching his shoulder. I watched his head turn toward me with out opening his eyes.

'I feel like shit... What is it... Win?' He whined into the still air.

"I'll be back in a few hours, I'm going to get us food." I told him. "Ok?" He moaned and I knew he understood me. I was in need of fresh air and some time to think, plus I thought it would be a good idea to pick up a pair of pants for myself since I still didn't have any. Of course, I was afraid I would run into Ben again, I had felt that way since the moment I had woken up in the empty car. And with Ed still not knowing the entire situation, I was probably in more danger then I knew. It is common sense to know that ff the criminal wasn't caught, he was sure to return.

It was something I was afraid to get into with Edward, and I hadn't really even had the time to talk to him about anything yet. Besides, he still was stressed out about his missing brother. Or at least I was. I knew that once Edward found out I had been raped, he would blame himself for not protecting me. Ed would either die from the guilt, or stalk Ben down himself so he could place a bullet into his heart.

I paid the woman at the register with four apples, tea bags, ramon, a small bag of meat and a tuna fish. I had totally forgotten about buying myself clothes as I turned the key, retuning to the motel room. I dragged the two bags inside, making sure locking the door was my first priority. I turned around finding Ed barley awake, sitting up on the bed, writing something on his lap. He looked up, pushing his left bang out of his face, starring at my sweats. Or his sweats. I guess it was this small detail that set the mood in the room.

"Don't you have your own clothes the wear?" He grunted with a nasty tone off he tip of his tongue. My guess he was still in a bad mood, prior to last night. Only if he knew...

"Nope, I bought you food. You should be thankful. Would you like some tea or-" I sighed digging in the shopping bag as he interrupted with a rant.

"It's freezing in here, those are the only other pants I have! I fucking had to sleep in these last night." He pointed at the long, brown pants covering his legs. I was used to his attitude by now, I just wished he could remember. It was times like this that I questioned if he really ever did say he loved me. Not that I cared.

"Geze Edward, sorry. Would you like them right now? I don't have anything else to wear, and you were pretty out of it when I left a few hours ago, so I thought it would ok if I-"

"I gave you shorts! And that's my shirt too, isn't it? No, keep 'em for all I care...'' He snapped, turning back to his writing. He was impossible, though I had the patients today. I didn't mind his horrible mood for now.

And maybe because part of me thought it was a bit sexy. Very sexy.

I decided to make him tea as I wanted a warm cup as well. November was near, and the cold rain outside that had started only after I had reached the room. After about ten minutes I walked over to the bed, wiping the bottom of our cups with a towel, as I had spilled a bit. I sat next to him on my side, as he looked up. I handed him the cup slowly bringing my bear, cold, feet onto the blanket. He reached for the cup putting down his paper and taking the warm glass from my hands. He sipped it looking out the window across from the bed. He was still so pale, and I had noticed his eyes had returned to the color from when he had first come down with the fever.

My guess was he was still pretty sick, possibly worse from last night. And. And that he was thinking about Alphonse.

Life was hard at the minute, he needed someone, we needed someone.

Damn it. Damn it all.

xxx

Author's Note: Thanks for all the kind reviews last chapter, -reviews are love- and sorry for the wait for this one...