Disclaimer: iCarly doesn't belong to me and never will. No copyright infringement intended. This all belongs to Dan Schneider.
Carly Shay very much did not want to go to the funeral. She didn't want to say good-bye to Spencer. Carly was still surprised she had managed to plan the funeral all by herself. Marissa had been cooking for a few days, Freddie had been watching Matthew and Elizabeth, and Sam had refused to leave the bathroom. " I want to stay home," Carly told Freddie.
"I want to stay home too, Carls. But we have to go," Freddie replied. Like Sam and Carly, he didn't want to attend Spencer's funeral. Seeing Spencer lying in a casket was going to be a shock.
"I can't wait to see Daddy, though," Carly commented. As much as she disliked her father for his behavior over the years, she wanted to see him again. He hadn't even attended her wedding. Spencer had walked her down the aisle. If she remarried, Spencer wouldn't be able to walk her down the aisle again. That thought hurt so much.
"He probably won't stay for very long." Freddie had only met Spencer and Carly's father a total of five times over the years. He had never liked Brian Shay. Brian had always seemed like a jerk.
"Fredward," warned Marissa. Although her son was right, antagonizing Brian Shay today was not very good timing. Brian had never been a very good father. He and late wife Kelly had married at seventeen when she had become pregnant with Spencer.
Brian had decided to leave when Spencer was nearly thirteen, only to find out that Kelly was pregnant with Carly. After Kelly's death, Brian barely took care of Carly. After Spencer's eighteenth birthday, he had decided to become Carly's guardian. Marissa would always have tremendous respect for Spencer because of that.
"Sorry," Freddie apologized. He didn't know what was wrong with him. He had cried again this morning, but that breakdown had been interrupted by the two little Shays. Mattie wasn't attending the funeral as Sam refused to let him go, and Beth was too young to go.
"It's okay," Carly assured him. She felt like lashing out at everyone too. It was a weird reaction, but she understood. Her anger had something to do with the five stages of grief or something.
"We have to hurry. Samantha's getting dressed," Marissa said. She was still surprised she managed to force Sam out of the bathroom. Since she hadn't left in days, everyone expected her to stay.
"Really?" questioned a surprised Carly. She figured that Sam would stay in the bathroom forever and custody would be awarded to someone else or something. It wasn't logical, but nothing was logical anymore.
Marissa nodded. "You look beautiful, Carly," she told her. Marissa hoped that Carly would eventually become her daughter-in-law, but she knew she shouldn't be thinking that at the moment. Today and tomorrow were days of grief. Thinking about happy things wasn't allowed.
"Thanks, Marissa." Carly wondered if she should change her shoes. They didn't seem right for a funeral. What if Spencer hated them?
"You're welcome, Caroline. We really should be going to the funeral home. What is taking Sam so long?" Marissa wondered. She hoped Sam wasn't falling apart in the bedroom. She wanted Spencer's wife out of there just in case she decided not to leave the bedroom, just like Sam refused to leave the bathroom for a few days.
"Are my shoes okay? I should change them. I don't think Spencer will like these shoes," Carly said, staring at her shoes. They were all wrong for her. Spencer hated these shoes, she knew it.
Freddie and Marissa exchanged a concerned look. "Your shoes are fine," Freddie assured her. He didn't know why Carly was freaking out about shoes.
"Spencer will love your shoes," Marissa told Carly. She had to comfort her, since irrationality was taking the place of grief. Shoes were an odd thing to worry about, but Marissa had been expecting this since the news of Spencer's death.
"Thanks," Carly replied. She sighed in relief. What if her dress was all wrong? Spencer might end up hating her dress too. That couldn't happen.
"Stop freaking out so much, Caroline," ordered Marissa. She knew where Carly's thought processes were heading, and there wasn't any time for that at the moment.
Sam finally came out of the bedroom, wearing a long black dress. "I'm ready, so let's go. Where are my babies?" she questioned. Sam couldn't leave without kissing Matthew and Elizabeth good-bye. What if they died too? Sam couldn't handle that.
"Mattie and Beth are at daycare. I figured they should go," Freddie explained. The daycare director had told Freddie that Sam didn't have to pay at all this week because of what had occurred. He figured Sam would be pretty happy about that, and accepted in her place.
"Okay. What if they get hurt? They need their mommy," Sam insisted. Her son and daughter would end up having abandonment issues, or they could end up orphans. Ending up orphans was not a good plan. They would end up in foster care.
"Sam, they'll be fine. Nothing's going to happen," Marissa soothed. She had a feeling she was going to be comforting all three kids in the next few hours.
Sam sighed. "Let's go," she snapped. Sam dreaded going to the funeral home, but this was necessary. Seeing her husband was going to hurt.
"I'm driving, so hurry up," Marissa told Carly, Sam, and Freddie. The three reluctantly followed her out of the apartment.
They four arrived at the funeral home about fifteen minutes later. The viewing wasn't going to start for another hour, so they had some time to spare. "When's Dad coming?" Carly asked Freddie. He had been put in charge of calling people.
"He said he'll be here in twenty minutes," Freddie answered. He figured that Brian would end up being late. He had never been on time for anything, as evidenced by the fact that he missed Carly's birth.
"Good. I can't go over there. Stall me somehow," Carly pleaded. Facing her father was going to hurt a lot. As much as she wanted to see her father, she dreaded it too.
"My mom's going to cook tons of food tonight," he tried. Freddie wasn't sure how to stall Carly, but he knew he had to find a way. He was worried about her, even in his own grief.
"That sounds good, even though we'll probably end up with way too much anyway," she replied. Carly remembered there being a lot of food left over after her grandfather's funeral. She, Spencer, Sam, and Freddie had come back from Yakima with bags of food.
"Every time there's a big event, there's food left over," Freddie pointed out. He remembered Sam and Spencer forcing food on him and Carly after their wedding because there had been too much for them.
"You're right," Carly conceded. Why did funeral homes have to be so cold? She hated that. Spencer would hate this, just like he would hate her dress.
"What are you two doing?" Marissa questioned. She had just talked to Brian Shay, and he was going to be arriving in fifteen minutes.
"Stalling, Mom." Freddie didn't know why he was telling her that, but it didn't matter. Carly and Spencer's father wasn't there yet.
"Stop stalling. Carly, your father's going to be here in fifteen minutes. I know you don't want to see him, but prepare yourself." Marissa knew that Carly, Sam, and Freddie probably resented her take charge attitude, but she didn't care. Somebody had to be strong and not fall apart.
"Thanks, Marissa. Where'd Sam go?" Carly hadn't seen her sister-in-law since they got out of the car. Where could she have gone?
"She's in the bathroom crying. I need to go get her," Marissa explained. Today was already an emotionally draining day. She didn't expect anything different for tomorrow.
"Why don't you sit down, Carls?" Freddie asked his best friend. He was still really worried about Carly, and nothing was going to change that.
"Okay," Carly agreed. She remained where she was standing, however. Where was she supposed to sit? There were so many choices.
"You need any help sitting?" Freddie saw that she looked confused, so he led Carly over to a chair and sat down next to her. He was determined to be Carly's rock today and tomorrow, even though Freddie knew he was going to start sobbing soon.
"You're such a great friend," Carly murmured. She was so happy that Freddie was sticking by her. What if she lost him? That would never be a good idea to think about.
"That's where I'm here for." He would always try his best to comfort Carly. She needed him. He couldn't remember the last time Carly had been this vulnerable.
XXXXXXX
Marissa entered the bathroom to drag Sam out of there if need be. "Samantha, I know you're grieving, but you need to go and be with your friends," she said.
"It hurts and I can't deal with this pain. Spencer was my soul mate," Sam sobbed. She didn't know how she was ever going to move on.
Marissa sighed. "Sam, let me tell you something. Freddie's father died when he was six. I was in your position once. I know how you feel. I know it seems like you can't see any happiness in your future, but there is. Think of Matthew and Elizabeth. They depend on you. They need you. Spencer's death has left a hole in your heart that can never be filled, but he'd want you to be strong."
Sam sniffled. "Thanks for trying to make me feel better. I'll come out now." She was still hurting, but at least Sam knew there were people around her for support.
"You're welcome, Sam." Marissa grabbed Sam's hand and the two went into the other room. They sat down next to Carly and Freddie.
A few minutes later, the door opened and Brian Shay stepped in. "Carly, where are you at?" he called. He wanted to see his daughter.
"Right here, Daddy," Carly replied. She stood up and went over to her father. Carly hugged Brian. She had missed him so much.
"I'm so sorry I wasn't here for you earlier," Brian said. He couldn't believe his irresponsible son had been killed in a car accident.
"It's okay, Daddy." Carly knew that her father was busy. He always was. Her father had a very important job.
"Where are those grandchildren of mine?" Brian questioned. He had never met his two grandchildren that Spencer gave him, and he didn't regret that decision. While Spencer had raised Carly, he wasn't good for anything else.
"They're not here. They're too young," Marissa answered. She didn't like the fact that Brian had showed up, despite the fact he had a right to be here.
"I'd like to meet them," he lied. Brian loathed the woman that Spencer had married, and by extension, he didn't want to see his grandchildren. They were probably just like that stupid girl.
"You can see them later." Marissa's maternal instincts were really kicking in now. Brian was making her uneasy.
"I'd like to see Spencer now." Brian went into the viewing room, and Carly eagerly followed her father. He was being nice so far, so maybe he wouldn't ruin things.
"It's nice to see you, Mr. Shay," Sam told him. She hadn't seen her father-in-law for a long time, and Sam wished she wasn't seeing him for this reason.
"It's nice to see you too, Samantha," lied Brian. His daughter-in-law was still the same person she had always been. Samantha would never change.
The door opened again. Gibby and Mandy stepped inside the funeral home. Those two were a surprise couple. Gibby didn't mind her making duck noises and Mandy didn't mind his shirtless dancing.
"We're so sorry," Gibby told Freddie and Marissa. Carly and Sam were busy with a man that Gibby didn't recognize.
"I'm going to make duck noises as a memorial for Spencer later," Mandy proclaimed. Quacking in honor of Spencer seemed like a good thing. She hoped the iCarly gang appreciated it.
"That's… nice," Marissa replied. Freddie struggled to hold in his laughter. He was used to Mandy's weird personality by now, and knew she meant it as a compliment.
"Let's go sit down," Gibby told his wife. The odd couple went into the room where Spencer's casket was stationed. They sat down.
"I wonder who else is going to come," Freddie said to his mother. They had met a lot of people because of iCarly, and everyone had always liked Spencer.
"We don't know yet," Marissa replied. She wouldn't be surprised if fans of iCarly showed up. Many fans of the show had been devastated upon its cancellation.
"How long are you going to stay, Mr. Shay?" Freddie asked Brian. He still didn't trust Carly and Spencer's father.
"A few days," Brian replied. He was going to stay at the Parker-Nichols Hotel, because he refused to stay with Sam. Carly lived with Sam and Spencer, but that didn't matter.
"That's good." Carly was glad her father was acting nice right now. Hopefully, he would continue to do so.
Nobody knew that today was about to get so much worse than it already was.