Summary: Naruto wakes Sasuke up by screaming in his ear. At breakfast, he learns that Itachi won't be able to stay with him during the morning. Finds out that Iruka is the new HoM teacher and plans punishment for Kakashi for making Iruka late. Naruto gets a week worth of detention with Harry during DADA, stupid evil toad must pay. Naruto summons Gamabunta during CoMC and regains some of his memories. At lunch, Itachi refuses to tell Naruto what class he is teaching so Naruto swears revenge. Poor Itachi. Kakashi shows up early to class thinking he is late to his first class, so funny you knew it had to happen. Naruto and Kakashi have a spar next to the lake as a demonstration for the class after they both recover from shock. After dinner, Naruto shows Harry, Ron, and Hermione the basic stances of taijutsu with Kiba's help. Goes to detention with Harry. Itachi plots painful ways to make the evil toad suffer when he sees Naruto's hands. Itachi plots revenge as he drifts to sleep with Naruto curled in his lap. Oo What will Naruto do for revenge? Yes, the pranks are finally coming.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, the Harry Potter series, or any of the characters. They belong to their respective owners.
Warnings: Out of character, boy x boy relationships, yaoi, language, extreme humor in this chapter, grammer mistakes since my computer hates me and won't spell check but I think I caught most of the mistakes.
Pairings: Sakura x Lee, Ino x Chouji, Tenten x Neji, Hinata x Kiba, Temari x Shikamaru, Tsunade x Jiraiya, Iruka x Kakashi, Kurenai x Asuma, Zabuza x Ibiki, Haku x Gaara
Possible Future Pairings: Naruto(uke) x Sasuke, Kankurou x Shino, Hermione x Ron, Malfoy x Harry, Anko x Itachi, and maybe Gai x Shizune. I might do Remus x Sirius as was requested, but it probably won't happen until way later in the story.
A/N: Thank you for your reviews. Must burn school. Important note at bottom, must read. Sorry for the delayed upload, stupid computer was having problems.
'Call me cute and you die.' --Demon talking/usually the Kyuubi, sometimes Shukaku
'Stop reading my mind' --thoughts
"Shut up, stop talking." --speech
"Ohayou. Buenos dias. Bonjour." --different language other than English/usually Japanese
"This is a note, pass it on." --notes, letters, written things, etc...
Chapter Thirteen: Let the Pranks Begin
Naruto woke up slowly, his mind still fuzzy with the rest of his memories. He even knew that Malfoy had hit him with a spell, causing the whole mess. Naruto sighed as he looked up at Itachi's sleeping face. It was still pretty early so no one had come downstairs to see the proud Uchiha asleep. Grinning, Naruto carefully slid out of Itachi's grasp and onto the floor. He still wasn't finished with Itachi's prank, but that didn't mean he couldn't torment him.
Smiling slightly, Naruto quietly snuck upstairs and slipped into the dormitory. Kiba shifted in his sleep as he opened his trunk, but Naruto didn't really pay attention. Opening one of the many compartments, he pulled out all that he would need for a little bit of pranking mayhem. Smirking, he changed into a pair of shrunken robes stashing his supplies on various places of his person. Naruto shut his trunk and locked it before he left, waking no one.
In the common room, Naruto had to hold his breath and suppress his chakra to nothing in order to sneak out. Once out in the halls, Naruto allowed himself to grin his patent fox-like smile. He needed to be quick if he wanted to accomplish everything. 'Kyu-nee, do you know where I can find Itachi's personal rooms?' 'Kit, do you really think you should be doing this? If you're gonna prank, do it big not something as small as this.' 'I know, but if I pull a small prank now 'Tachi will be caught of guard when I pull the big ones.' 'Kit, you're actually smarter than I thought. Okay, keep walking. You need to go down three floors and head towards the lake.'
Following Kyuubi's directions, Naruto stopped in front of a portrait of a sleeping dragon. Naruto had to bite back a giggle as he saw something pink peaking between the dragon's claws. Choking on his laughter, Naruto quickly teleported into the room after making sure that no one saw him. In the room, Naruto snuck into the bathroom avoiding all of the traps that Itachi had set. Snickering, he quickly added neon orange dye to Itachi's shampoo and conditioner. Next, he grabbed the toothpaste and using a syringe, he injected some green dye into the tube. If Itachi brushed his teeth, it would make them look a moldy green. Smiling at his handy work, Naruto went back into the main room.
'Kyu-nee, should I do anything else? I want to set up a few other pranks before I go and wake Itachi up.' 'Kit, don't do anything else right now. I have an idea of my own that I want to try later on the ugly toad. Now, hurry up if you plan on doing something to Kakashi.' Nodding, Naruto silently left the room the same way he had entered. Luckily, no one was in the hall and the portrait was still sleeping soundly. Naruto wanted to dye Kakashi's hair, but he didn't want Iruka to get caught in the trap so he decided against the dye. No, he would give Kakashi a new look, all he had to do was sneak into the Great Hall and plant a little tag on Kakashi's chair.
The tags planted successfully, Naruto decided to grab a cup of coffee and a plate of syrup drenched waffles. Carefully, he brought them back upstairs to the Gryffindor common room and managed to sneak back in without waking Itachi. Snickering quietly, Naruto placed the dishes on the floor and quickly built a staircase using books that had been left out the night before. Picking the plates up again, he forced himself to have a look of concentration as he climbed up the books.
At this point, Itachi started to wake up. Seeing him blink his eyes open, Naruto pretended to lose his balance on the final step. He allowed the plate of waffles to fly on top of Itachi's head, the cup of luke warm coffee spilling all over his lap as a look of absolute horror spread across his face. Naruto fell down for real, landing in a heap with the books piled around him. Itachi was glaring daggers at him, his hair sticky as waffles and syrup began to trickle into his lap to join the coffee.
"Naruto." Itachi spoke his name in a deadly whisper, promising much pain. Naruto took this as his que to turn on the water works. Poking out a quivering bottom lip, he made his eyes as large as he could. Within moments, he had tears pouring down his cheeks as he began to tremble. Naruto resisted the urge to smirk as he saw Itachi's expression soften. Kicking it up a notch, Naruto spoke in a stuttering and small voice. "I..I..I'm sor... sorry 'Tachi. I... I wa... wanted t...to get you br...break...breakfast. I di..didn't... mean t...to." Naruto added the final touch by crying in full force.
Itachi groaned as he heard Naruto stutter. Sighing, he felt his anger disappear as he stared into watery blue eyes. Even if Naruto was a ninja, he had just been turned into six year old and he still wasn't in full control of his body. "It's okay Naru-chan. I'll go and take a shower. Now, be good and take the dishes back downstairs and eat your breakfast." Itachi patted Naruto on the head as he stood up and left the common room, not wanting anyone to see him. Naruto smirked as he quickly cleaned up the mess he had made, returning all of the books to were he found them before he went back downstairs with the plate and cup. Itachi hadn't even noticed the blonde taking several pictures.
Naruto was sitting in Iruka's lap when Itachi stormed into the hall, his hair a brighter shade of orange than his old jumpsuit. No one was foolish enough to laugh when they saw the murderous look on his face. Naruto took another few pictures before he hid his camera. He even caught a few with Itachi showing his moldy green teeth. Iruka nearly choked on his eggs when he saw Itachi. Once his throat was clear, he called the younger man over. "Itachi-san." Itachi turned when his name was called, when his eyes fell on Naruto, his face became even deadlier as he stalked over to them.
Naruto made sure that nothing in his appearance betrayed his amusement as he looked up at Itachi with wide, innocent eyes. "What happened to your hair 'Tachi-nii?" Itachi growled as he bared his teeth, causing Iruka to once again choke, but this time it was on his coffee. "Naruto, what did you do to my things?" Naruto tilted his head as he changed his expression to one of confusion. "What do you mean Nii-san? I don't know where your room is. I thought you were staying in the same house as Sasuke-teme." Naruto wrinkled his nose as he pretended to think hard.
Itachi was not happy at all. Not only did Naruto spill syrup into his hair, but he had also spilled coffee all over him. But he couldn't blame the blonde for the dye since he had no proof. He was about to question the blonde further when he saw Naruto's eyes shoot wide open. "Ne, did Peeves dye your hair and teeth? He likes to pick on the new people. He tried to pick on me when I first came here, but I pulled a prank on him and he's left me alone since. But that was when I was six." Itachi slowly started to calm down. If it wasn't Naruto then it had to be Peeves since the dragon that guarded the entrance to his room hadn't been woken up by someone trying to sneak in or out of the room.
Naruto nearly burst out laughing when Itachi's face began to lose its deadly look. 'You are so evil. Kit, I'm proud of you. You are most certainly part fox; you're definitely sly and tricky enough to be one.' Naruto hid a small smile as he heard Kyuubi cackling in the back of his mind. "Iruka-sensei, do you still have that dye remover that I gave you?" Iruka looked down at Naruto, blinking as it hit him. Iruka could only shake his head; the boy really outdid himself this time. "Yeah, I think I even have it with me. I'll give it to you later Itachi when I find it. You can't use it until at least two days after your hair was died, otherwise it'll only make it another color." Itachi sighed as he ran a hand through his orange spikes.
"Thanks Iruka-san. If I find out who did this, I'll make sure that they'll have nightmares every time they even see a bathroom." Itachi chuckled evilly as he left to see if he could repair the damage to his teeth. As soon as he was out of the Great Hall, Iruka looked down at the smirking blonde. "Alright Naruto, please tell me that's all you did this morning." Naruto couldn't contain himself anymore, laughing hard as he looked up at his former teacher. "I thought you knew me better than that Iruka-sensei. Of course that's not all. Besides, that was only a practice run. I have something much worse in store for him later on." Iruka shuddered as Naruto jumped down from his lap and gave a cheerful wave good-bye as he ran over to join Kiba who was on the floor laughing like a lunatic.
Naruto smiled when Kiba quieted down long enough to choke out a question. "How did you do that? You would have had to bleach his hair first to dye it that color." Naruto smirked as the twins nodded in agreement. "Now why should I tell you? Oh, wait, watch Kakashi-sensei." Naruto managed to pull Kiba up in time for him to see Kakashi sit down. As soon as Kakashi's hand reached for a glass, he was surrounded by a cloud of pinkish smoke. When the smoke cleared, his hair was a blend of neon pink, purple, and lime green. His face mask was a shocking shade of yellow and the bandana that covered his left eye was a hideously bright shade of magenta with the word pervert written in big gold letters.
Sadly for Kakashi, that wasn't the full extent of the damage, his shirt had been shrunk so that it was skin tight and it was checkered pink and purple the same color as his hair. His loose black pants had only the color changed, but it was a mixture of green and purple making it look like vomit. To finish the look off, his skin had been stained a sickly looking pale green. The Great Hall was deathly silent as the students watched Kakashi blink his single eye slowly. Naruto smiled as Iruka stared in awe at his handy work. Naruto himself was proud, a true master piece in the art of pranks.
Kiba was once again howling with laughter, only this time Naruto and the twins joined him in rolling around on the floor. Kakashi stood up and calmly walked over to the group of laughing boys. He stopped as he bent down to hover above them. In a calm and quiet voice, Kakashi questioned Naruto. "Naruto, did you do this?" Naruto stopped laughing long enough to snap a few pictures and answer. "I did Kakashi-sensei. That was for making Iruka-sensei late Ero-sensei. I warned you didn't I? You're lucky though, I let you off light." Naruto snapped another couple of pictures at Kakashi's stunned face. "You'll be stuck like that for two days. Even if you change clothes, they'll just change into the same thing, but the colors might be a little different."
Fred and George stood up and began to examine the still stunned Kakashi. "Naruto, this is a true master piece. I don't even think we could manage this. Fred, you know what this means." "Yes George. We have finally found someone worthy enough to be our rival. Kiba let us discuss the rules tonight. Fill Naruto in on the details sometime before then." Kiba nodded as the twins walked off, their heads together as they began to brainstorm pranks they could pull that would top the ones they had just witnessed.
"Kiba, if this is going to be a prank war, then it is only fair that you be on their side. What I did this morning was child's play. I'll come up with some fair rules and I'll talk to Iruka-sensei to see if he'll act as one of three judges." Kiba nodded dumbly as Naruto ran over to cuddle with Gaara. By now, the Great Hall was alive with chatter as the students began to think up wild stories on how their two new teachers had gotten their new looks. Each theory was crazier then the last.
Kakashi snapped out of his daze as what Naruto had said registered in his mind. Regaining his composure, he left a snickering Kiba so he could have a talk with his lover concerning a former student of his. If Naruto considered this child's play, he seriously didn't want to experience some of his more complex pranks. Iruka chuckled as he watched Kakashi walk towards him. Naruto had actually done Kakashi a favor by shrinking his shirt since it showed off his well muscled chest and stomach. Iruka blushed faintly as he started to think a few perverted thoughts. Kakashi had really rubbed off on him more than he was willing to admit.
Gaara was stunned as Naruto cuddled him like a stuffed bear as he giggled. He not only managed to get Itachi, but he also pranked his teacher in the same hour. Sasuke also looked shocked, but it was quickly wearing off as he started to laugh. Naruto had pulled out a camera and snapped pictures of all of their shocked faces, hiding it away again before anyone could respond. He pulled his camera out again and took a picture of Sasuke as he finally allowed a smile to slip past his expressionless mask. Gaara shook his head as Naruto tucked his camera away again. The blonde really was a mastermind when it came to pranks.
Sasuke was stunned, but he couldn't hold back his laughter as he finally comprehended the sight of his brother with neon orange hair and green teeth. It had to be the one of the funniest things he had ever seen in his life. Kakashi's new look made Itachi look stylish in comparison. He had a funny feeling that Naruto had used nothing but a few things in order to pull both pranks off. If this was simple child's play for the blonde, Sasuke had a sinking feeling that his next pranks would be 'troublesome' to quote Shikamaru. Sasuke smirked as he pulled out a camera of his own and took a quick picture of Naruto's smiling face. He wouldn't try to stop the blonde if it made him this happy. An idea began to slowly form in his mind as he continued to watch Naruto giggle as he gave Gaara, Haku, Temari, Shino, and Kankurou a brief explanation of what he did to Kakashi.
Naruto skipped over to the Hufflepuff table as students began to leave for class. He smiled when he saw Hinata petting Akamaru. "Ohayou Hinata-chan. Guess what?" Hinata smiled down at Naruto as he bounced next to her. "What Naruto-kun?" "I got my memories back. I think they came back each time I slept. Hey, did Baa-chan come up with a way to change me back yet?" Hinata smiled sadly as she shook her head. "I'm sorry Naruto-kun but she hasn't found a way to change you back to normal yet. We're still trying to figure out what you put in your potion." Naruto smiled as he grabbed her hand and started to drag her outside. "That's okay. I've been thinking about what happened and I think I've come up with a way to change me back, but I won't be able to change back until Halloween since it'll take a while for the potion to brew."
"Yosh. Even when you are small the Flames of Youth burn brightly..." Lee's speech was cut off as a book flew and hit him in the back of the head, knocking him out cold. Sakura smiled as she picked her boyfriend up. "Sorry about that. I've been trying to break him of his habit of screaming like Gai. I'm not even going to hold my breath in trying to get him to stop." Hinata giggled as Sakura gave her boyfriend a loving yet annoyed look. "Sakura-chan, can you send a letter to Baa-chan and ask her to come by tonight. I think I found a way to change me back but I want to make sure with Baa-chan. I don't want to be turned into a baby next, or worse an old man."
Naruto shuddered, trying to block out the mental images he was getting. Sakura giggled, nodding her head before she left, dragging Lee with her. It looked like he would be spending the morning in the hospital wing. Herbology passed quickly, the class was just as fascinating to Naruto as it had been the first time. In Diniviation, Naruto kept making funny faces at Professor Trelawney behind her back, causing Ron, Harry, and Kiba to snicker. Whenever she looked over at them, they would pretend to do their work. Of course this put her in a bad mood and they were assigned to predict what would happen to them for the next month.
Naruto ran through the halls, avoiding students as he weaved his way through the crowds. He reached Professor McGonagall's room in record time, a huge smile plastered on his face as he held up several scrolls for her to take. "I finished the project plans and details Professor McGonagall. Can we have free time while you go over my ideas?" Professor McGonagall opened up one of the scrolls and started to read what was written in it, she had only read for a few minutes before she set it down on her desk and stared at Naruto in awe. "Yes, I'll let you guys have a free period while I read these. Now, go and take your seat, class is about to start." Naruto smiled as he skipped over to sit next to Kiba who was talking to Ron about Quidditch.
"Class, today we will be doing nothing since I have to read a few scrolls. So you have a free period and no homework. Don't talk too loud, and no magic unless you are practicing a spell for a class. I don't want to be disturbed, so behave unless you want a detention." Professor McGonagall hid a smirk as she turned to sit down and pulled the stack of scrolls towards her. Picking up one, she found it labeled. Smiling, she dug through the pile until she found the one labeled fifth years. Opening it, she began to read, her eyes growing wider and wider at all of the details and thought put into it. The project not only forced students to have an understanding of the basic principles of Transfiguration, it also had students learn some of the effects that Charms and Potions had on it.
"Naruto, come here for a moment." Looking up, Naruto reluctantly put away his prank book and walked up to Professor McGonagall's desk. "Yes." She smiled as she handed him a note that was sealed. "I want you to give this to Professor Snape when you go to your Potions class today. I also have a note that I want you to give to Professor Flitwick when you see him tomorrow in Charms. I'll give you that note at the end of class. And Naruto, three hundred and fifty points to Gryffindor. Your project ideas are amazing." Naruto blushed at the praise he was being given, but he smiled as he pocketed the note. "I'll give him the note Professor. Do you have any questions about my ideas?" "No, but do you mind if I share these with Professor Dumbledore?" Naruto shook his head. "I don't mind, but don't tell any of your other students that I came up with the ideas. When I've left the school, you tell them all you want about me." "Deal. You can go back to your seat now."
Hermione looked up from the homework she was doing as Naruto sat down next to her. "What did Professor McGonagall want?" Naruto smiled as he pulled out his book again. "She wanted to give me a note to give to Professor Snape. Guess what, I got a lot of points for Gryffindor because of my project ideas. I think we'll start on our project next week." Hermione's eyes widened in shock before a smile made its way onto her face. "Can you tell me about it? It would be so cool to be able to transform into an animal." Naruto smiled as he continued to scribble notes into his book, perfecting the prank he would play on Itachi for revenge. He still had Umbridge's prank and he had to write up the rules for the prank war.
Naruto put his sketch book away as an idea came to him. Pulling out a blank piece of parchment, he quickly scribbled a note on it before he passed it to Hermione. Hermione, do you like pranks? If you do, would you be willing to act as a judge in a prank war? She read the note quickly before she scribbled on it herself, a small smile tugging at her lips. She handed it to him and he quickly read what it said. I love pranks, just don't tell Ron or Harry. They would never stop teasing me about it. I really don't want to be a judge if others would find out. Naruto smiled, scribbling another note underneath hers. Okay, but would you help me write up the rules? And I need help choosing the third judge. Iruka and Dumbledore would be perfect for the first two judges. We also need a way to score the pranks.
Hermione smiled, scribbling one last note before the bell rang. She handed it to him before she started to pack away her things. Naruto smiled when he read it. I'll help you write the rules and I'll think about the judge. And as for how to grade the pranks, why not rank them or something. We could rank the prank by what is used, the time it took to set it up, and how much risk was involved. It would also be wise to make a method as to how the targets are selected. But Umbridge is definitely on the list. Come with me to the library after classes.
Naruto nodded, tucking the note away into his bag before he ran up to Professor McGonagall and took the note she had for Professor Flitwick. It was time for lunch and he wasn't going to miss out on eating if there was going to be ramen.
A/N: This is the last update I will be able to make until Winter Break. I have been banned from the internet until then, and the only time I will be allowed on is if I have research to do. Stupid school, must burn it down. The good news is that I will be able to type so when I am allowed on the internet again, I can hopefully upload at least five chapters or so if not the rest of the story. I look forward to your reviews and thank you for reading. I will continue this story even if it takes me a few years, hopefully it doesn't.