A/N This chapter is set a month after the events of last chapter. Idk i feel like this chapter is sort of filler bridging the gap between Mallory's experiences and the events of the movie. But alas, the movie events begin next chapter! Finally! Review, favourite, follow! Tell me what you think!
Oh and as I write this, exams start on Monday. So expect no or less frequent updates for the next two months or so. Super sorry for leaving you all on a slight cliffhanger, but hopefully you guys will understand school is more important and I need to focus. And of course be patient because this is where the fun starts!
"Mama!" Sofia slapped her mother's cheek repeatedly and began to cry. "Mama!"
"Ariadne! Ariadne wake up, look at me!" Mallory slapped the mattress in frustration; like hell was this woman going to die on her. Her eyes drooped shut but she forced them open, the glazed stare fixing on Mallory weakly.
When she spoke it was with great difficulty, her words coming out awkwardly. "Tell... tell Elliot...-"
"No please. Please no. Please don't make me watch again." Mallory knew she was asleep. The dream was too vivid to be real life; lucid dreaming she was sure it was called. Only she had no control. She was beginning to wake up but she knew her mind would torment her and make her watch again.
Her body buckled and she screamed again, sweat dripping from her even though it was winter. The baby's head was visible through the blood and Ariadne was using the last of her strength, even falling silent to pant and push. Sofia held onto her mother tightly, willing her in their common language. And suddenly, the baby suddenly left the birth canal; on a slide of blood and mucus and onto the mattress beneath her. Ariadne fell limp and the baby seemed a little shocked.
Mallory murmured, begging at herself. "Please. I'll do anything."
"Je veille sur vous. Toujours." And then Ariadne fell still and silent, as her soul vacated the earth. The alarm and sirens and flashing lights took a back seat. Sofia began to cry properly, her tears mingling with the blood and sweat and membrane fluid.
"Please... no. Not again."
A funny feeling flipped her stomach but it was too late. The Soldier had raised his gun and fired only once but that dead on perfect aim reached its target. The STRIKE members silenced at the sound, the only noise in the air the echo of the gunfire, the distant crackle of fire and the sound of the wasp landing in the clearing zone.
And of course, the sound of Elliot Kohl's dead body hitting the floor. The Soldier turned to Mallory and with dead eyes, placed the gun back into his holster.
"My mission is to serve." He said blankly, his gaze fixing on Mallory.
His cold eyes burned her and Mallory suddenly saw flame everywhere. As she opened her eyes, the bright flame giving way to a dark bedroom. Cold sweat covered her body, clinging an oversized track t-shirt that belonged to her boyfriend to her naked body. Apart from the cold sweat a warm weight covered most of her left body. Feeling as if the flame was on her again, she tore herself out of the bed so quickly that in her slipstream she woke the weight beside her.
"... Mallory?" The voice moaned behind her as she raced into the bathroom, slamming and locking the door shut. Her hand groped for the light in the dark, and when she switched it on she yelped at her reflection in the big mirror that occupied the wall.
Her brown eyes were blood shot and ringed with sleep and tears; underneath bags purple as if somebody had blacked her eye gave her cause for concern. Hair wild, as she'd probably been tossing and turning again. Her t-shirt was red but soaked darker with sweat, the outline of her breasts and stomach and hips visible as it clung to her. Her thighs were crisscrossed with veins and pale. She gripped the cool sink and breathed deeply, as the world began to spin around her as she'd gotten up too quickly and she couldn't breathe. In, out, in, out.
"Mallory!" Rumlow rapped twice on the door. "Mal baby, let me in we can talk about it!"
She waited until she felt her heart beat return to a comfortable pace, then she ran the tap and splashed her face. "I'm fine." But her voice wobbled.
"Baby I know you are not fine." His tone was tinged with sarcasm. "Look, just come out when you feel better, I'll be here."
She nodded at herself in the mirror. "Okay."
Flashes of the dream crossed through her memory but somehow as the beginnings of the sunrise filtered through the tiny window in the bathroom, Mallory felt better. She could control the dreams in the daytime; it was just nighttime when her subconscious tortured her. Her hair was slick with sweat so she tied it back in a high bun. Another sensation filled her bladder but once she had peed and tidied herself up, the sound of the toilet flushing and the tap running and then she unlocked the door.
"Could you hand me my Ramones t-shirt? It's on the floor somewhere."
Rumlow returned to the door holding her grey article of clothing, himself wearing a black t-shirt and a pair of boxers. He watched with concern as she slipped the track shirt off her head and pulled the Ramones on.
She smiled at him reassuringly as she switched the light off and walked back towards the bedroom. He caught her hand before she climbed back into the bed and sighed, pulling her to him.
"Are you sure you don't wanna talk about it?" He asked, as she wrapped her arms around his waist and sighed into his chest.
"Yeah. It'll just make it worse." She glanced up at his chin and cupped his cheek, deciding he needed to shave as his hair prickled her hand. "Let's get back to bed, hm?"
Rumlow smiled at her and bent to kiss her. But as she tried to focus on the pressure of Rumlow's mouth, she saw only the cool glare of the Soldier as he waited for her to fall back to sleep.
As the icy months of late February turned to the cooler months of March, Mallory sat in the waking hours in the tank-like office of her boss and clasped her hands together. She was dressed comfortably in a pair of dark skinny jeans – which had became a lot tighter then she remembered – and sky blue blouse which she hoped was semi-professional. It had been a nice day outside so she'd worn ballet flats although now, as her heels began to sting with pain of cheap soles against the rocky sand above the Bunker, she was beginning to regret it.
Pierce himself sat opposite her in a black pinstripe suit, blue shirt and dark blue tie reading from a file marked CLASSIFIED. He pushed his glasses up his nose and sniffed before settling the file on the table and smiling at Mallory for what seemed like the first genuine smile she had been rewarded in her time with him.
"How was your leave of absence, Dr. Smith?" His tone was friendly, accessible. She didn't remember him being so nice when she was here every day.
"Greatly appreciated. Seriously, it was so generous. Two weeks would've been enough, sir."
He raised his hand and smiled, basking in the glow of her sincerity. "Please, Dr. Smith. You are a valued member of our team here and I do realize that asking you to go in the field was a lot." And that's putting it lightly. "And anyway it's not like you haven't not been in here at all over the past four weeks. I'd always intended to give you time off anyway whether you were injured or not. How is the leg by the way?" The statement conjured up the image of a new addition to Mallory's scar collection – alongside the scar she received when she'd broken her wrist after falling off the swing set – the bite marks alongside her calf. They were ugly puckered scars, teeth marks that spanned across the expanse of her calf, still in that stage of bright redness as if she had just acquired him but she was hoping they'd go away some time soon. The doctors had cleared her of rabies and any infection but still they had hurt when they were healing.
"I won't be wearing shorts any time soon but it healed well, thank you. The doctors you helped fund for me were very good."
Pierce smiled and lent back, his office chair creaking beneath him. "Are you ready to come back or do you need more time?"
Mallory's smile vanished and her good mood diminished. It was a question she had been toying with since she'd vacated Pierce's office last. Was she ready to come back and face the Soldier? To watch and take care of him even though he had displayed a horrific need to execute a man whose wife had just died, and had almost lost his children? Even though Mallory had stated that he didn't have to do what Pierce wanted him to do? Multiple conversations told her what Rumlow thought; he said although the Soldier had well and truly destroyed any chance of a working relationship, she should still treat him with a professional partnership. Was she ready to come back? Physically she was fine but mentally? She wasn't sure.
She had asked and asked to see Sofia and the baby but they had denied her; they refused to explain until one of the techs lost their rag with her and exploded, yelling about why on earth the poor traumatized girl want to see the woman who had watched her mother die and didn't do anything about it, and was with the man who had shot her father? Mallory had stopped asking after that.
"I'm ready sir." She said instead, forcing a smile back onto her face. "Did the Soldier come back from his mission?"
Her leave of absence wasn't really a leave at all; she was still required to come to the office and wake the Soldier up if Pierce wanted him on a mission. And he'd had. On the third week of her blissful holiday, Pierce called her at nine o'clock and asked her to come in. The mission was a simple assassination of an important Chinese engineer. Mallory had ignored every time the Soldier's eyes dripped towards her and had left as promptly as she could manage. Even being in the same room as in was difficult.
"Yes he did. No injuries. David put him back to sleep for you; I didn't see the point in calling you in to do something that any of us could've done."
"Thank you, sir. Do you need him awake?" She made a motion to ask to get up and Pierce gestured that she was allowed.
"I don't need him for a mission but didn't you say you'd read that he needed a rest from the cryo-freeze?" His tone suggested that he did indeed want her to wake him up. Swallowing tightly, Mallory forced her smile wider and cursed her younger self.
"Yeah I did. I'll go wake him, sir."
Pierce nodded and Mallory left the room, her arms clasping her shoulders as she trotted down the stairs and walked across the cool floors towards the lab. She passed soldiers she recognized, and said hello as they passed and waved. David was hurrying along the lab corridor, but paused long enough to run a hand through his dark hair and yell at her something about how those jeans were too tight. Laughing, Mallory shook her head.
"Blame Rumlow. He's terrible at cooking so we ate takeaway most of the time."
"Oh yeah always blame it on Rumlow." He went to leave again but stopped, pointing at her and narrowing his eyes. "Hey you mentioned a while ago you were looking in on the mind wiping tech didn't you?"
Mallory nodded uncertainly, unsure of where this was going.
"I knew it was you. Come down and see me later. I've got a couple of files you might be interested in reading."
Mallory smiled at him but her enthusiasm for the topic had been diminished in her now hatred of the Soldier and her time away. "I'll swing by later when I've checked him over."
She walked onwards until she came face to face with the cold metal doors. Taking a deep breath, she spoke.
"Dr. Mallory Smith." She said, after a moment, her eyes fixed on the red light which would soon flick to green when it recognized her.
"Voice recognized." She lent in close where the hidden panel was and felt the slight change in heat and air as the retina scan surveyed her eye. "Retinal scan complete. Hello, Dr Smith."
The red light flicked over to green. The guard at the door sniffed as his friend looked on.
"What?" Mallory challenged, her tone half serious and half amusing.
"You'd think they'd know us by now." The guard remarked, gesturing towards the light as if the source of the A.I voice was from there. Mallory laughed.
"Yeah you'd think. How was your weekend?"
The guard made a face. "The worst. Pierce called us in – gotta mission for us. Pirates have taken a S.H.I.E.L.D ship." He brightened up visibly as he added. "On the bright side it's with Steve Rogers."
Was that supposed to mean something? "Steve Rogers?" Her mind searched the mental database of all the people she had heard, met or seen and the name suddenly clicked as a shield bearing the colours of the US flag cropped up in her mind. Oh. "You mean Captain America?"
"The one, the only."
"Wow." Mallory nodded, in awe of the legend of Steve Rogers. Every American worth their weight knew the story of Steve Rogers; a Brooklyn born boy who was sickly and riddled with infection. Denied from the army many times, Steve's tenacity with the recruiting office led him to make an acquaintance with a German genius who had developed the Super Soldier Serum that could create an army of mentally and physically advanced soldiers who could turn the tide of the war within a day. Steve was chosen for the programme and was turned into the first (and ultimately the last) Super Soldier who fought in the name of freedom. On a routine mission to dispel a top secret German science division, Roger sacrificed himself to save an entire city by driving the plane filled with explosives into a frozen landscape.
However his body was preserved. And seventy years later, he was unfrozen by S.H.I.E.L.D scientists and thrust into another war with a group of misfits fighting against an angry Asgardian trickster and his army of Chitauri. Mallory had been in Washington when it had all gone down in New York but she remembered the frantic phone call from her mother who had forgotten she wasn't actually anywhere near the alien invasion. It was like her grandmother's description of the JFK assassination, or the terrible sadness that befell the country when the images of 9/11 broadcast around the world; everybody remembered where they had been when the Chitauri invasion had happened and we were confirmed to not be alone in the universe. Mallory had been doing a shift, in her first year at the hospital and she'd been in the staff room brewing herself a coffee. She remembered how her feet had ached, and how she'd been glad to have a moment to herself. She remembered when her mother had called and she had tutted, sighing as she picked up the phone to answer. As Mallory walked into the lab, she could hear her mother's frantic voice like she had been on that day, asking her over and over if she was in New York and if she could get to safety. After calming her down, her mother had told her to switch on the news. Still on the phone, Mallory had taken her coffee towards the TV in the patients rec room and switched the news on. As scenes of the aliens flew around the screen and the newscaster had assured that this was not a trick, Mallory remembered her coffee tumbling to the floor and her mouth opening wide with shock before calling for her then boyfriend Liam to come and watch.
Even before he crashed his ship, the Cap's story was tinged with sadness. His parents had died young, leaving him an orphan when he needed his parents most. And his best friend, James Buchanan 'Bucky' Barnes, had been killed on a mission and he blamed himself. Mallory remembered her father telling her the story of James's fall from the train where the German science division had been transporting their leader.
It seemed unfair, Mallory mused, that a man who had been born in the time of war and woken when it was won, was asked to fight another war.
She focused back on the guard. "I'm jealous. Have fun with the Cap and remember to give him my phone number!"
"Hey! You're dating Rumlow!"
Mallory made a playful noise of scorn. "I can still window shop!" She yelled, as the metal door closed behind her and she walked into the lab.
The Soldier lay asleep in his glass coffin, a vision of a slightly more murderous and less feminine Snow White. Mallory activated the waking protocol and watched tensely as the green glow quickly enveloped the coffin followed by a hiss of air and the doors swung outwards. Her stomach was knotted; she was nervous. So nervous. Would he have even noticed she was gone? Would he even notice she was still utterly devastatedand completely pissed off about his actions? Probably not. A surge of hatred well in her stomach mixing with the anxiety and she turned as she saw an arm reach out to drag himself upwards.
She busied herself, reading over her notes obsessively and crossing things out when she heard him moving behind her. She turned and watched as the Soldier got out of the coffin with ease, his cool eyes assessing her calmly as if she had been there the entire time when he was awake. He rubbed a hand through his hair and scratched at his eye.
"Do you remember your name?" She asked before he got a chance to sit on the examination table.
He spoke after a moment, and seemed to sigh a little as if it saddened him. "No."
"Do you remember your duty?"
He nodded. "Yes. To serve."
They were almost identical to the words she had said to him in their first meeting, but everything had changed. He limped, shirtless with the black sweatpants, over to the examination table and hauled himself up. Mallory walked over and used a tentative touch to assess his limbs, noting bruises and cat scratches from his latest mission. She couldn't help but notice a fresh and deeper cut above his eye, as if someone had gotten a lucky shot. He'd probably killed them straight after. The thought made her stomach turn. She dabbed at it with anti-septic and placed a Band Aid across his forehead to cover the scratch. As she shone a light in his eyes to check pupil response, he seemed to be staring right at her, his eyes still as stone. Mallory tried desperately to ignore him but it was impossible to. His eyes were fixed on hers and she was sure even if she left the room they'd still be watching. It was unnerving. A cooler stare than the one he had given her when she'd realized he was about to shoot Kohl but deadly all the same.
Mallory lowered the light, the question on the tip of her tongue. The Soldier waited as if he had sensed she was going to ask in and when he nodded once, she couldn't help but come out with it.
"Did you lie to me the entire time?" She swallowed hard, afraid of the answer. "Were you always going to kill him?"
The Soldier shook his head. "No. There was a moment... a few moments where I considered allowing him to live."
"But you changed your mind."
He nodded. Mallory could say what she liked about the Soldier but his one admirable quality was he never flinched from the truth. She sighed and folded her arms, feeling as if her hatred had sank her sanity deep in the pit of her stomach. Not thinking about him for a month hadn't worked; he plagued her in waking hours now, along with sleep. She found herself thinking of the Soldier and his rage at the most inappropriate moments; coffee with David turned into a lingering thought process of the Soldier shooting at the Russian guards, dinner with her parents quickly turned to her wandering in the streams of her mind thinking whether or not the Soldier had lied to her the entire time. Even as Rumlow made love to her, she found herself staring at the ceiling in the dark and seeing how his arm had glinted in the moonlight, it's weight against her hip when it fallen and how innocent the Soldier looked as he slept. She couldn't help but compare it to his ramrod tenacity to follow orders in the cold hours of daylight. How could a man be so... so gentle and soft but so hard and brutal at the same time? Mallory was obsessed with his thought process and not in a good way.
"Pierce needed him gone."
"Pierce didn't understand why he was blackmailing him." She retorted.
"Did you tell him?" He wasn't angry; just a quiet tone of questioning. Mallory faltered, falling short of her own mistake. Her silence was worthy of her denial and the Soldier's chin tilted back, a gesture of nobility as if he suddenly believe they were now on the same wavelength.
"No." Her denial was for herself. "I didn't think Pierce needed to know. Kohl's dead, and even Pierce's power can't bring him back."
"Yet you're still angry with me."
Mallory's huffed in outrage. "I'm mad at you because... because you could've saved Kohl! You could've stopped your need to prove to Pierce that you're a good little soldier or whatever the hell you're trying to prove to him! You could've... saved Sofia-" Her voice cracked horribly. -and that little boy from being totally alone in this-"
He calmly interrupted her. "It sounds you're more angry with yourself, not me."
The realization washed over her. She could've saved Kohl by warning him about the Soldier. She could've saved Ariadne. She could've saved Sofia and that poor baby boy from being orphaned. Tears stung her eyes.
"I-" She was at loss for words. The Soldier shifted uncomfortably as Mallory found herself beginning to cry, and he jumped down from the examination table. He reached her in two quick paces and although he didn't touch her, softness suddenly overcome his normally steel features.
"Ariadne died of haemorrhaging; there would've been more risk if you moved her and the helicopter wouldn't of reached her in time. The pregnancy and her body was to fault, not you. Sofia had less of a chance then we did from escaping that pit of dogs alive; she was lucky to get away as she did. You almost lost your leg yourself when you tried to reach her, if I remember correctly." His eyes hardened. "Kohl's death is on me. Not you. Don't blame yourself."
"I can't help it. I'm a doctor." She found herself shrugging. "I'm supposed to save people, to help. Not watch them die." Images of Ariadne falling against her daughter's chest as the life drained out of her
"Sometimes all you can do is watch them die."
Mallory's mother made a bolognese with pasta and pineapple upside down cake for afters. As Mallory spooned the tubes of pasta coated in the red sauce into her mouth, she watched with embarrassment as her mother quizzed Rumlow over the top of her bouquet of white roses that adorned the table. It was the same type of Q&A her other serious boyfriend, Liam, had gone through and although it brought back bittersweet memories, Mallory found herself laughing when Rumlow exchanged a help me look with her. The man was the leader of a black ops STRIKE team yet he couldn't handle the quick fire questions of a concerned parent without crumbling.
Her father knew Rumlow but they acted as if they had met; she only knew this because she had seen them talking when her father had visited the Bunker and dropped off some lilies for Mallory as a well done for taking part in the field mission.
Mallory swallowed her last tube of pasta as Rumlow began to sweat nervously and decided to intervene. "Dad, will you please tell Mom to lay off my boyfriend?"
Her father cut into a meatball and chewed it before answering. "Why do I have to tell her? She won't listen to me."
Mallory laughed. "She won't listen to me either."
Her mother's wine glass teetered dangerously to spilling across the carpeted floors as she turned to Mallory. "Sweetheart, I'm just questioning him. He doesn't mind, do you Brock?"
Rumlow pulled at the collar of his black shirt and forced a smile. "Not at all, Mrs Smith."
"Oh please." Her mother waved her free hand in the air. "Call me Julia."
Rumlow met her eyes and Mallory became alarmed when her mother reached for the wine bottle again. She noticed her father's eyes narrow the tiniest amount and he wiped his mouth with the napkin, placing it down on the table.
"Are you finished Rum- Brock?"
Rumlow visibly tensed at her father's voice and swung his head towards him. "Yeah." Mallory found her gaze slipping towards Rumlow's plate; still half full of pasta and the sauce. Mallory frowned.
"Could you help me clear away and bring in the next course?" Her father's voice was unnaturally tight for such a simple request. Rumlow nodded and began clearing up the plates, following her father into the kitchen. Mallory watched them go, noticing how they seemed ill at ease with each other. To be honest, they'd been slightly uncomfortable all night but Mallory had put it down to his prior knowledge of Rumlow's job and the involvement he had with his daughter. It was probably just her dad being overprotective. She hoped her father would go easy on him when they whispered in the kitchen. Mallory shook her head and looked to her mother.
"So... what do you think?"
Her mother laughed. "He's cute! I'm impressed."
Mallory's faltered slightly. "What's that supposed to mean?"
Her mother's mouth fell open and she took Mallory's hand. "Oh sweetie! I didn't mean it harshly. It's just... I'm impressed with how fast you've fallen for him. I thought after Liam-"
"Mom please." Her voice was low and rough. She could see where this road was heading. Mallory's throat suddenly tightened, and she reached for her own glass of blood red wine. She reached for it too fast and the wine knocked, splashing all over her hand. Although it was darker then blood, and lighter in consistency, she suddenly felt her body tricking her mind into believing it was real blood. As it dripped down her elbow, she found herself thinking of how watery Ariadne's blood had been when it had dripped down her arm. The colour... her mind connected the dots and her heartbeat began to rise. No please. Not here, not now.
"No I know you don't like to talk about what happened but-"
"Mom don't. Not now." Her voice was edging on panicky and she shifted in her chair, wiping the wine on her hand across the tops of her black jeans hoping it would clear it.
"You need to talk about it sometime." Her mother squeezed her free hand but Mallory wrenched it away. "Sweetie, you never talked about it after you told me. Danni and Liam... it was an awful thing he did to you."
The images of Ariadne's difficult birth were replaced by the moment a friend of a friend had mentioned seeing Liam and Danni kissing together in a restaurant. She couldn't remember the girls name but she could remember the feeling of disbelief. She could even remember her exact thought; Liam wouldn't do that, Liam loves me. How wrong she had been.
She had caught them in the act. After spying on him for weeks determining whether or not what the girl had said was true, she tracked Danni to her apartment and walked in on them. They weren't in the middle of the act but they had clearly just done it when she'd walked in; Liam was brushing his teeth and sliding boxers up his frame, Danni was on the bed talking to him. She would always remember the sight of Danni's bottle blonde straw-like hair spayed out on her bed, as she traced a finger across her flat stomach and invited Liam to take her panties off and fuck her again. She had never believed that she would experience anything as heartbreaking, as horrific as that moment but she'd had. Watching Ariadne die in her daughters arms was a lot more traumatizing then witnessing her long term boyfriend and her best friend have a long term affair. Although it had taken a back seat in her top ten of horrible moments in her life, Mallory still hated to think about it.
There was a smear of the pasta sauce on the table. It was thick and filled with red peppers, vaguely resembling the look of how the placenta had mingled with the fluid and tears and blood. Mallory could hear her heartbeat thumping in her ears, drowning out of the noise of her mother reminding her of the details of Liam's betrayal. But all she could see was Ariadne. Close to tears, Mallory threw back her chair and raced through the kitchen, slipping past Rumlow and her father in a heated conversation, into the backyard.
The fresh air hit her and she staggered, breathing in and out as her heart began to race uncomfortably. She groped the air for a support as she felt herself drowning in the weight of her guilt. The Soldier's words rang in her mind like a bell.
His face came to the forefront of her mind. "The pregnancy and her body was to fault, not you." "Don't blame yourself." How can I not?
"Mal!" Her father had her in his arms first, his concerned face looming in her vision but not distracting her. "What's wrong?"
She struggled out his cage-like grip, not wanting to feel as if she was trapped. "I-I... I just need s-space." The words were difficult to pant. Her father backed away immediately, and pulled Rumlow back when he went to grab her.
She still felt like she was drowning, pressure all around her. She couldn't breathe or think properly. All she saw was Ariadne and Sofia and the baby. Kohl's body thudding to the floor, how the Soldier's jaw had felt when she had socked him. The Soldier... she saw his arm flash past as he ran in her minds eye. His athleticism, how he had thrown himself in front of the bullet for her. Their relationship was still strained but she couldn't deny she cared for the man. And a part of her wanted to believe that he cared for her as well. Why else would he try to make her feel better by easing her guilt? Focus. She focused on his fluidity in battle, his movements, his dancers grace. Tracing his steps when she'd watched him train with those STRIKE agents, Mallory felt the pressure lift and herself being able to breath again.
The world returned to colour as she sucked in air gratefully. The pressure was gone and she was free to think. Think of the Soldier. She was afraid to let his image go in fear of being submerged again.
Someone gripped her shoulders. Her Soldier? "Mal?" Rumlow's eyes pierced her and she returned to him.
"You alright?" Rumlow's grip left her.
Mallory managed a nod and felt herself scooped into her father's arms for a hug. "You almost gave me a heart attack." He smelt of garlic and aftershave; she threw her arms around his portly waist.
"I almost gave myself one." They both managed a weak laugh. "I'm sorry. I dunno what came over me." A lie. She knew exactly what had come over her but she had fought it off with the Soldier's help.
"The cake is ready!" Her drunk mother was obvious to the drama that had came over them. Rumlow and her dad had shared a look and with her father's arm draped around her shoulders, all three trudged back into the kitchen dutifully to receive their cake.
"Today was weird, huh?" Rumlow sighed, after getting into bed with Mallory after their long day.
He hadn't officially moved in yet but he spent most nights at Mallory's and most of his clothes were here. After many nights spent sleeping at hers, she had requested to see and sleep at his house for equality. Rumlow had agreed warning her off the awful structure of the place A bare skeleton of a home in a shitty area, with few possessions and even fewer pieces of furniture, Mallory had understood why Rumlow would rather stay in Mallory's small but cosy apartment instead of a place which had a landlord who spoke Polish randomly sliced with words of English, owned a ferocious German Shepard that barked all hours of the night and fucked his wife who screamed loudly through the thin walls. With zero sleep at three am, Mallory had grabbed Rumlow and drove him back to hers where they'd gotten back into bed and for fun, Mallory had imitated the screaming Polish woman until the fakeness of her moans turned into real ones due to Rumlow's skill in the sack.
"Yeah." Mallory wore shorts and a t-shirt with a cartoon picture of three wolves howling and the words HOUNDS OF JUSTICE written in bold print. "It was."
"There's no shame in going to a therapist. I do." She hadn't known that and raised her eyebrows. "Did you really think I didn't? All STRIKE members do. Its practically in the job description."
She groaned and fell backwards on the bed, rubbing her stomach and sighing. "I know there's no shame. I just... I feel like it's an illness. It'll pass."
"I think you should." His disapproving voice came from above her and Mallory sat up, taking his hands.
Mallory laughed. "You sound like my dad."
"God I hope not." Rumlow sat down beside her and knocked her with his shoulders as if they were kids. "Your Mom is hilarious."
Mallory was glad the lights were off as she went red. "Oh God I am so sorry she was so embarrassing!"
"It was cute. She just concerned."
Mallory found herself thinking of Liam when she spoke, sounding darker then she'd intended. "She's interfering."
Rumlow kissed her exposed shoulder and laughed. "Hey, Miss Grumpy, don't be such a bore. I got something to tell you."
Mallory's stomach tensed and she turned to face him in the dark, masking her concern with humour. "You're not dumping me are you? Because I am not giving that blue sweatshirt back it's too comfy."
He knocked her again. "Don't be dumb. I'd never dump you." His tone grew serious. "I have to go away for a few days. Mission. Pirates have taken a S.H.I.E.L.D ship captive."
Mallory's eyes widened. "Whoa. Heavy stuff?"
"Yeah. Jobs with Romanov-" She grinned at the mention of her only living idol – the rest of her idols had died long ago. "- and Rogers."
"Rogers?" She remembered the guard who had told her of the same mission. "Oh yeah guy on the door was telling me about it. I don't want you to leave."
She pushed him on the bed and straddled him, silencing his throaty laughter with a kiss. His thumb dragged up the bottom of her t-shirt and he tugged at it insistently, like a child tugging at it's mother's sleeve.
"I'm gonna miss you Rumlow." She said breathlessly between kisses.
"I don't believe you." He retorted, laughing as he peeled her t-shirt off and ran his hand up her exposed stomach, hands brushing against her breasts. "In fact, I think you're gonna have to prove it."
He flipped her on her back and in seconds her shorts were off, flung across the room. Mallory laughed and pulled him for another kiss. The Soldier flashed in her minds eye and she knew she was going to be okay.