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***
The nurse saw as the four all turned to look at her with expressions of hope and amazement illuminating their pale faces.
With tears in his eyes John choked out with a smile, "I'm sorry...I'm really going to need you to say that one more time."
The nurse smiled at John glad to finally be able to give the distraught father some good news said, "Sam's awake...and he's asking for you John."
John closed his eyes and smiled as a single tear slowly traced a path down his cheek. Finally some good news for his baby. John had been convinced the nurse had more bad news for him, but it turned out to be quite the contrary. He was awake. Sammy was awake.
John opened his hopeful eyes and looked over at Dean who had his hand covering his face. Caleb and Bobby both had a hand on one of Dean's shoulders. John could tell by the way Dean's body was shuddering that his oldest was sobbing.
John could hear Bobby and Caleb whispering words to Dean.
John grabbed Dean's hand and pulled it away from his face. He could see Dean's red rimmed eyes and the glistening tear tracks on his cheeks.
Dean looked up at his father. "Dad?..."
John smiled. "Yeah Dean I know..."
The father knew how emotional this moment was for his oldest. Dean had thought his brother was dying and he was unable to be with him. Now the Winchester's were receiving great news. Dean looked down at the brace on his leg knowing that he could not see Sam just yet, then with tear-filled eyes he smiled at his dad. "Go tell my pain in the ass brother that it's about time he woke up."
John chuckled through the tears of joy. "I will kiddo. You just relax. Bobby and Caleb will keep you company."
John turned to follow the nurse out the door when Dean's voice stopped him.
"Dad?"
John turned around. "Yeah buddy?"
Dean blinked as another tear rolled down his cheek. "Can you tell Sammy...will you tell him...tell Sammy that I love him," Dean mumbled as he cheeks turned a bright crimson.
John smiled at Dean and nodded his head. Dean smiled turned his head and let his eyes fall closed. Within seconds Dean had fallen into a deep sleep. The men knew that Dean was finally going to get a good sleep, now that the thought that Sam was dying was no longer lingering in Dean's mind.
***
Two minutes later John walked down the hall to Sam's room in the ICU. He took a deep breath before walking through the door. No matter how many times the nurse told him Sam was awake, a part of him was still worried that he would open the door and Sam would look like he had mere hours before; like he was dying.
John looked in the room and saw Dr. Thatcher leaning over a figure he knew was Sam. Upon hearing footsteps enter the room Dr. Thatcher turned her head and smiled when she saw John.
"About time John, someone has been asking for you."
She then stepped aside and John felt his heart rate pick up as he saw Sam, sans the ventilator looking at him. Sam still looked very pale and judging by the monitors his blood pressure was still low and his temperature was still slightly elevated, but he was awake.
Sam attempted to clear his throat and offered his dad a small smile before he croaked out, "Hey...dad."
John let out the breath of air he was unaware he had been holding since entering the room. He felt more tears fill his eyes. 'Damn Winchester, you have cried more the past few days than your whole life,' John thought to himself.
John then walked over to Sam and gently gave him a hug. He felt the tears flow freely down his cheek as he whispered, "Sammy."
John pulled back and looked at his son. Sam still looked like hell, but all that mattered was hours ago he had been holding his dying son and mere seconds ago he had been hugging his conscious son.
He sat on Sam's bed. After realizing that his father was crying John looked at his father inquisitively. "Dad?" Sam whispered.
John wiped his face off with his hand. "Sammy, I'm sorry, you just, you almost died...I thought I had lost you...it's good to have you back baby."
Sam smiled at his dad before he remembered Dean. "Dad how's Dean?" Sam urgently asked.
"Sammy, he's going to be okay. His leg is pretty messed up, but the surgery he had was a success. With some rehab he will be fine."
Sam tried his hardest to keep his sluggish eyes open, but his body was still incredibly weak. Sam attempted to focus on his dad. "Dad...I'm sorry...I tried to help Dean...but..."
John stopped his son before he could continue. "Sammy listen to me, I'm so proud of you. You took care of Dean while having serious injuries yourself. Sammy you two are alive because of you kiddo. And Dean wanted me to tell you that he loves you Sammy."
John spotted the look of shock cross his youngest son's features. "I know shocking, but he specifically asked me to tell you that. And Sammy..." Sam blinked up at his dad, "I love you too Sammy."
Sam smiled at his dad before the pain he had been trying to suppress reared its ugly head. Sam whimpered and a tear leaked out of the corner of his eye.
John immediately tensed and cupped his son's cheek in his hand.
"Sammy? Talk to me kiddo, what hurts?"
"Evrythin'" Sam muttered before he pressed his head into his pillow as another whimper of pain escaped his throat.
"Hurts...daddy" Sam whispered as more tears rolled down his cheeks from beneath his closed eye lids. John immediately pressed the red button above Sam's bed and a moment later Dr. Thatcher came rushing into the room.
Immediately noticing the expression on Sam's face mixed with the tears and sheen of sweat on Sam's forehead, she knew he was in a lot of pain.
She approached Sam and leaned in to his face. "Sam, sweetie, I need you to tell me exactly what hurts."
Sam continued to whimper, but he managed to respond to Dr. Thatcher. "Um...my back...and wrist...but my head hurts really bad..." Sam squeezed his eyes shut as another wave of pain rolled through his head.
John looked at Dr. Thatcher begging for answers. Before responding to John she injected morphine into Sam's IV. John allowed Sam to squeeze his hand while he endured the pain before the pain killer worked. Within minutes Sam had relaxed and fallen asleep.
John let out a breath of relief when Sam finally fell asleep. He then turned to the doctor. "What the hell?"
"John, that was the first chance Sam had to realize how much damage his body endured. He has a large amount of stitches in his back, plus he has the broken wrist, the severe concussion, not to mention that he only recently finished getting blood transfusions. I know Sam woke up and that is fantastic news, but he is far from healed. I mean he hasn't even had the surgery for his wrist yet. You just need to be here for Sam for now. He is going to be in a lot of pain probably for the next few days. I'm setting Sam up for a regimented system for pain medicines. I don't want to keep giving him morphine so I'm going to switch him to a different medicine. At this point you really just need to be here for him."
John nodded his head at the doctor.
Dr. Thatcher gently grabbed the exhausted father's arm. "John Sam beat the infection. He has quite a few more obstacles to overcome until he is fully healed, but so far your son has proved to be quite the fighter. Just keep encouraging him, and as soon as your other son gets out of his metal brace he is welcome to visit Sam. I'm sure that will only help the two heal."
John smiled at the doctor. "Thank you very much," he choked out.
The doctor smiled before exiting the room. John practically collapsed into the chair next to Sam's bed. He closed his eyes and for the second time began to pray to himself.
"I know I walked away from my religion, but at this point, it is really the only thing keeping me going. I truly thought Sam was going to die. For the last day and a half I thought I was going to lose my baby. But I didn't. I'm sitting here watching his chest rise and fall and well a miracle occurred. I truly believe that. Sam should not have survived. He was just too far gone, but he did. I mean there may be a medical explanation, but I'm not going to search for one. I have never believed in miracles. I mean losing my wife and finding myself a widower with two boys pretty much affirmed my belief that miracles don't exist, but now...Thank you...Sammy is alive...Dean is alive...and somehow I know it wasn't just because of the doctors...Just thank you."
John then looked at Sam, he looked at his baby breathing, he looked at Sam living. John grabbed Sam's hand being mindful of the IV and held it while he laid his head down on Sam's bed. Then the mighty John Winchester released all the heartache and emotion he had tried to suppress for the past two days and the tough father sobbed into his son's arm.
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