The past six months filtered through her memory in fragments. Nothing made sense. She revised memories hundreds of times and still nothing made sense. What Natasha saw HYDRA as and what she had been told it was, was a very different story. They hadn't arrested her, just taken her captive to 'look her over'. She'd hated the agent who looked her over, and the other one who tried to make conversation.
"Are you stupid? Are you seriously that stupid? God." Natasha laughed harshly, then glared at her. "Did no one tell you? HYDRA are the enemy. You are the enemy."
She had seemed to sure of herself. Maybe it was the bullet that had caused her to say those crazy things. The shock perhaps. But she had seemed to be so sure of herself...
And instead of charging for him, the Captain turned on his side and utter shock laced his genetically enhanced features. Shock that she had never seen. He had turned white, as if he'd seen a ghost.
Why? Why had Steve done that? He had the chance to exterminate a threat that was capable of murdering him?
"This man here-" Pierce rapped on the glass; the man did not stir. "- is responsible for keeping the peace around the world for the last fifty or so years."
Pierce. How could killing an oil baron and a father trying to free his family from horrific experiments count as keeping the peace? And Fury's death? To her it seemed to like Pierce was denying acts of terrorism or motives to keep himself and the project funded.
"And I'm dressed differently and I look different. And I'm falling from this... I think it's a broken door or something that's been ripped from some big metal crate. I don't know, I'm not sure. And I'm falling through the air and it's so cold and it's snowing and sometimes it feels like I've fallen into an ice cold river."
It had seemed like an overactive imagination at the time but now it seemed like it had meant something. But what? Had it been his reality?
"Yeah. So it'll never die." Rumlow looked a little abashed at his next statement. "Like us hopefully."
It didn't contribute to any of the mystery but seeing him on that street brought it all back. His love, his laugh, his life with her. How could he lie to her that entire time? And how could she have missed it? He'd seemed so genuine.
She had loved him because he was the opposite of Liam yet she'd discovered he was every bit like him. Maybe she had a type. A lying pretty boy with a knack for getting into her head.
Her head... her head hurt. Everything in it swirled like clothes in a tumble dryer and she was so tired of not knowing everything, of not having intimate and ultimate knowledge of what she was doing and where she was going. It seemed her life was built on lies and secrecy, that the last six months of her life was false and pretend. She needed answers and she had gotten some from her father about Rumlow but it seemed everything else he was intent on keeping her in the dark about. He would know everything about it. She had to see him to ask about HYDRA and why
Romanoff was convinced they were the enenmy and why Director Fury had died discovering HYDRA.
The door suddenly clicked and a man with dark hair, hazel eyes and tanned skin entered. Mallory blinked hard, her heart thudding into a stop, clearing her suddenly misted vision as the mirage of Rumlow shimmered into a similar looking man in a white coat.
"You're free to go."
She shoved past him and walked down the hall. They'd cut away her jacket to inspect her for any wound but as she was merely a little shocked, they'd just given her some drugs to calm her down. Her thick boots, a relic from her brief stint in the field, made that atypical military noise against the hard floors and she reached back and tore her hair free from its tie, allowing it to fall naturally around her shoulders.
She marched for the exit but voices caught her ears; two men yelling at each other. She branched off into the door on the left, into a small room which overlooked a large glass office similar to Pierce's in the now defunct Department X. The door held a sign saying BANK MANAGER. Through the glass she saw Pierce standing at a wooden desk, yelling at Rumlow who was yelling back.
"-shouldn't of put her out there! There was no use for her!" Rumlow's voice was obscured somewhat by the thick glass but the open door allowed her to hear most of what he was saying.
"I had my reasons! And don't presume you can speak to me as if we are equals, Agent Rumlow. You're my best agent but you are damn well replaceable!"
Rumlow looked furious, sighing audibly and running a hand through his short hair although when he spoke he was making an effort not to yell. "Why did you do it then? Huh? Did you want to prove something to her?"
Mallory lent against the doorway and rapped twice on the wood. Both men turned, and Mallory smiled, as calm as she could manage.
"Yes, sir. Why was I put into the field? There was really no reason for me to be there, no reason at all."
At the intrusion, both men whirled at her voice. Rumlow went white then let out a laugh of relief.
"Baby, I-"
She held up a hand to silence him, choosing not to look at him in case she did something uncharacteristically violent. She saw even without looking at him directly a worried expression crossed his face. She instead focused on how Pierce was trying to so hard to maintain a respectable composure.
Pierce sighed. "I don't have to explain myself."
"But I'd like you too."
"I know about the phone call to Romanoff." Mallory's heart stopped; had the bug worked up until that point and he'd heard what they discussed? Rumlow looked back and forth between the two, then sighed.
"Why did you call her?"
Mallory ignored him and Pierce spoke over him.
"I don't know what the hell you two discussed but I couldn't take any chances. After Dr. Harriet's departure-"
"You're allowed to say 'murder' now, Pierce. I'm not a little girl and I'm not stupid." She didn't mention how her father had been the one to tell her.
He smoothed down his jacket and circled the desk to face her properly. "-you were the perfect replacement. And in all his fifty years, he's never bonded with anybody quite like he bonded with you. I don't know why – which I dislike – as you're completely ordinary and average like the rest of them but for some reason he's taken a shine to you. I couldn't risk that even if you might've accidentally passed on some valuable information to Romanoff. And I can't really risk any chance of you defecting because I believe the Soldier wouldn't do as well under anyone else's care."
"That doesn't answer my question."
Pierce sighed and gripped the desk. "I hoped putting you in the field again and watching Romanoff, Rogers and their new friend, Wilson, putting hundreds of civillians lives at risk to evade capture would help you make your own decision about them."
Mallory weighed up the decisions in her mind, then she narrowed her gaze on Pierce. The truth needed to get out; she needed to know. Maybe it would be a mistake asking him. She'd end up regretting it she knew. But she needed to know. The benefit of knowledge outweighed the risk and she was sick and tired of being the last to know everything. Mallory walked forwards and crossed her arms, eyeing Pierce critically.
"Natasha was shot by the Soldier. I went to see if she was okay and she denied my help." Mallory swallowed all of her reluctance down and forced herself to spit it out. "She said she wasn't going to accept help from the enemy, especially one like HYDRA. What was she talking about?"
"Baby don't-" Rumlow was warning her; Mallory looked at him properly and felt a pang of unwanted love and hatred swell in her chest. She narrowed her eyes at him, suddenly finding it hard to breathe.
Then Pierce laughed. Her head swivelled to him; it was a snarky, mocking laugh but a laugh all the same. It cut the air like a shark's fin in the water, harsh and unrelenting. It locked into her subconscious and the image of the Soldier on a marionette was suddenly conjured from her nightmare. The puppet master, laughing at her.
"I'm afraid I haven't been entirely honest with you. We're not a sub-department of S.H.I.E.L.D."
Mallory tilted her head, the laugh flashing horribly through her mind. "I'm afraid I don't understand."
"Have you ever wondered why our members say Hail HYDRA?" Mallory shook her head; when Pierce had first mentioned it to her she had put if off as one of those age old traditions that he had carried from childhood. "It's a relic from the founding of HYDRA in the time of the Third Reich. Members of the Third Reich of course said "Hail Hitler!" so in an effort to relate to the Nazi programme but also promote their own ideology, the department created the "Hail HYDRA!" catchphrase. HYDRA at the time served as Adolf Hitler's deep science division, developing weapons for the Second World War. Initially it was lead by Johann Schmidt-"
"The Red Skull?"
He clapped his hands together, delighted. "Yes! You know your history. Anyway after HYDRA was formally disbanded, S.H.I.E.L.D recruited former agents for intelligence services like Arnim Zola. Zola was unwilling to abandon HYDRA's ideas but decided Schmidt's frankness about their activities would not do. Instead, he recruited members to the new intelligent HYDRA formation and planted sleeper agents in the two super powers at the time, the USA and Soviet Russia. Here we acquired and brainwashed Bar-" He looked nervously to Rumlow and straightened his tie. "-the Soldier forcefully into doing our bidding-"
Mallory swayed on the balls of her feet, unable to process this sudden influx of information. HYDRA were Nazis. And the Soldier had been forcefully placed into the programme. She'd been told he'd volunteered for the programme. Stupid girl. Stupid, stupid girl. It was obvious really. Who on earth would volunteer to kill for a living? She'd swallowed Pierce's lies so easily, so eager to impress him and his company into giving her such a prestigious position with such great benefits. It was so obvious, she was blind to not have seen it before. Hatred of her father swelled, and hatred of Pierce and HYDRA and Rumlow increased tenfold. They'd all lied to her about HYDRA and it's involvement with S.H.I.E.L.D. The people protecting the republic of the world were all criminals, liars, sleeper agents. And her father... her father had been a member of S.H.I.E.L.D since she was a kid; did that mean he'd been a HYDRA agent that entire time? All throughout her life she had been living under the roof of a man who agreed with the ideals of an organization that had tried to bomb the world and he had willingly gone into the fold? Her trust shattered. Who could she trust, apart from herself and perhaps her mother? Images of the man with the metal arm who had hunted so ruthlessly on the highway.
And then her chest tightened with sympathy. Poor poor Soldier. Her eyes brimmed with tears threatening to overspill and give the game away. Who had he been before Zola had horribly stolen him from his life and forced him to kill? It didn't necessarily abolish the fact he'd heartlessly killed Kohl but it did indeed lessen it; it wasn't his fault.
Pierce carried on as if he hadn't noticed she was going insane.
"- to abolish anyone who got in the way of attempting to break apart our ideals. S.H.I.E.L.D was formed after the Second World war and agents were planted immediately in its structure and survive to this day. Without us, S.H.I.E.L.D would be nothing. Once Project INSIGHT gets in the air-"
Rumlow interrupted. "She doesn't know about that, sir."
Pierce launched into an explanation. "Oh well, no need for secrecy now? Its a marvellous idea, Mallory. I know you'll agree with us when you know."
"Just tell me." She spat.
"Three Hellicarriers are due in the air tomorrow. They are carrying Zola's algorithm which calculates a persons past to predict their future. Then they wipe out the threat before the crimes can be committed."
Mallory's mouth dropped open and it all became so clear to her. The note flashed in her memory, on Pierce's desk alongside the files of Fury, Rogers, Romanoff.
Project INSIGHT under threat. Eliminate priority target with WS, then the rest.
AP
It was obvious. Fury had obviously discovered Project INSIGHT. Maybe he had learned of the algorithm that predicted the threat and deduced what the Hellicarriers would do when they were in the air. Maybe he had discovered it through hacking the files on the database or discovering a small Department X server and learning from there. Somehow Pierce had found this out and decided to call in the Soldier to eliminate the priority target before going after the two people who would be informed of such a conspiracy in the event that Fury ever discovered it; Romanoff and Rogers.
Pierce approached her as he talked, but Mallory found herself backing away. "There's no need to run away, Miss Smith. We're still the same HYDRA, just slightly different ideals."
"Slightly different! You're telling me I'm working for Nazis who want to commit a mass genocide just because a few people have a bad past and you expect me to be okay with that?!"
Rumlow approached her his arms up in surrender. "Calm down-"
"Don't you dare tell me to calm down." She screamed, her yell echoing around the office as her cheeks ran wet with tears. "You lied to me, you all lied to me! This is completely unethical!"
They tried to reason with her. "It was for the best-"
"You treated me like a child, hiding information from me!"
"You're acting like one right now! Look at you!" Rumlow grabbed her by the shoulders and a chill ran up her spine; he still didn't know she was aware of his intentions on her. "You gotta understand we knew you wouldn't join us if you knew what we were about-"
Mallory laughed, a crazed laugh that almost matched the level of horror she had felt when Pierce had laughed. "Really?! Don't you fucking dare turn this on me, Brock, I am so mad at you right now. I am mad at both of you."
"Listen-"
Before he could launch into his rhetoric, a tech popped his head around the door totally oblivious to the screaming match and said. "We have him. We're treating his arm right now."
Mallory fell silent, tearing her body away from Rumlow and turning into the corner. She broke down in tears. Guilt surrounded her in a veil of grey. She had done this. She had sent the Soldier onto those missions. Although unknowingly, she had assisted in HYDRA's world order. She had thought herself for all her life that she was the good guy, the Rogers to the Red Skull, the Thor to Loki, the Abel to Cain but right now she was indeed the serpent in the beautiful garden who would bring about the downfall to humanity.
"The Soldier needs you."
Her voice was a whisper, hoarse and broken. "I can't." Don't make me.
"If you know what happened to Dr. Harriet, then you know you can't quit HYDRA." The threaten of blackmail – assist or die – loomed over her head and she turned slowly to meet Pierce's sharks eye. "Do the right thing."
Rumlow was waiting. He still didn't know and he was waiting for her. Pierce walked to the door and waited at the door frame for her, his lips curled in an unpleasant smug smile. He had every right to be smug. He had won after all, as Mallory put her hands on her upper arms, suddenly freezing cold and followed him through what she had assumed to be a bank vault to where the Soldier was being held. Halfway down, they were flagged by STRIKE members adorned with guns. She couldn't run now. Despite Pierce saying that the Soldier liked her she'd still be shot within a second.
If anybody else tends to him, he'll be hurt for sure. She reasoned with herself. But she still felt awful, bogged with guilt and hatred.
A tech approached them as they arrived. "Sir, he's unstable." The tech paused to find the right word, "Erratic."
The group walked straight past him, Mallory's eyes searching. Her sight fell upon the Soldier, shirtless and wearing sweatpants being fawned over by techs fixing his arm as he sat in the jagged tarantula chair which she knew was the memory wipe machine. Her eyes swelled with tears again and her heart ached with sympathy, the urge to yell sorry whilst grabbing a gun and running with him from the room increased.
"Do your job." Pierce hissed at her, and she walked nonchalantly over to where the screens where it displayed his vitals. He was perfect, in health but not mind. She jabbed the screen and pretended to look busy, drowning out the noises of Pierce's voice and the fact that Rumlow was breathing near her.
"Mission report." Pierce commanded. Mallory sneaked a peek at the Soldier through a curtain of her hair and saw him staring off into the distance. "Mission report now."
When he still didn't answer, Pierce slapped him. The sound of his palm hitting the Soldier's cheek was harsh but no one in the room bar Mallory jumped.
The Soldier looked unconcerned as this happened all the time. "That man on the bridge... who was he?"
Steve Rogers. His name was Steve Rogers and although I'm probably going crazy he knew you, I swear he knew you. Mallory continued to pretend playing with the screen but looked back at how Pierce's jaw had tightened and he looked pretty angry that the Soldier was asking.
"You met him earlier this week on an assignment."
It wasn't a lie but then again it wasn't quite the truth. Mallory stopped pretending, and turned her body to listen fully to the conversation.
"I knew him." The Soldier said, in that blank emotionless way of his. On the surface it would look as if he was merely speaking blankly but Mallory knew him well enough to recognize the distant look in his eyes, the kind he'd had when he'd first told her of his dream of falling into the snow. Pierce hid a sigh and pulled up a chair, sitting down opposite the Soldier and talking in a way that reminded her of her father.
"Your work has been a gift to mankind. You've shaped the century." With blood and anguish and it's all your fault. "And I need you do it one more time. Society's at a tipping point between order and chaos. Tomorrow morning we're gonna give it a push but if you don't do your part I can't do mine. And HYDRA can't give the world the freedom it deserves."
Mallory wanted to tut. Or more likely lunge across the room at Pierce screaming and clawing his face like a banshee. That arrogant son of a bitch... here he was attempting to convince a man who had been brainwashed to serve and kill under the Soviets and HYDRA that his work was good. The way the Soldier reacted was reminiscent of how Mallory always would after her father would try and be reasonable with her; he pursed his lips in a childish way and spoke in a knowing way.
"But I knew him."
Pierce nodded a little, and looked resolute before giving up on trying to reason with him like an adult to a child and standing up. He turned to a tech. And the Soldier turned his head to her.
His eyes were filled with emotion, something she had never expected for the Soldier. It was obvious; flashes of his past life were coming back. And it was good. She moved closer to him, her eyes glittering with tears and fought back the urge to take his hands.
"Prep him." Pierce ordered, fully prepared to hightail it out the room to spread more lies into the world was Mallory smiled reassuringly to the Soldier to which he relaxed onto the chair.
"She kept him out of cryo-sleep for too long." The technician said worriedly, punctuating his words by adding a glare at Mallory which she didn't care about.
"Then wipe him and start over."
At the sound of his words, he looked over anxiously to Pierce. His entire body tensed as if he was anticipating an attack or pain, muscles rippling as they contracted and relaxed at his command. He looked... and this was a word she rarely used to describe him but he looked afraid. It set Mallory on edge. They were going to wipe his memory.
All his progress, all of their relationship so far he'd lose. He'd lose pizza, training, the Russian prison, his confession that he sometimes had vague nightmares about falling. He'd lose her punching him, his amendment that Ariadne it wasn't her fault, his face moving into her hand at the tender moment they shared in the prison, his hand falling against her as they slept. He wouldn't remember. Mallory bit her lip and staggered backwards a little, trying desperately not to cry in front of the techs.
The technicians came over, and pushed him onto the seat. The machine then clamped him and he tensed even harder. At least it wouldn't hurt... she'd read the memory wipes weren't unpleasant. But the way everyone was acting she'd think he was about to get tortured or something.
Pierce left and so did the STRIKE team but Rumlow lingered, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Maybe you shouldn't watch this."
She forget she was pretending that she hadn't found the bug and recoiled under his touch, folding her arms. He looked hurt then his sadness changed to anger.
"Is something wrong? You've barely looked at me since I got back."
Mallory's eyes were fixed on the scene in front of her, Rumlow's voice reduced to an irritating soundtrack to accompany the scene. A tech approached the Soldier with something in his hands, then placed it in his mouth. The Soldier bit down on it, staring ahead as if he was going to do something unpleasant. Mallory's arms slowly unfolded when she realized what it was...
"Why are you putting that on him?"
Nobody answered. A tech started the programme, and the machine suddenly jolted, forcing the Soldier to lie on his back. The machine's tarantula-like arms began to buzz with electricity that would stimulate his memory and suppress it; they locked onto his head and the Soldier yelped a cry of pain that cut into her like a knife.
Mallory slowly realized. This was a day of knowledge but she was learning fast. This was going hurt. This was going to hurt the Soldier, the knowledge thick and tense in the air.
As the machine began to buzz. Mallory found herself caught in a time lock, trapped and unable to move. His eyes were alive with feeling, with human feeling. Then the screams began.
They tore through her core and sanity, ten times worse then anything Ariadne could produce. They were shrieks of a man at his end, a man who was on the verge of a breakdown unable to be compared with anything on this astral plane. She wasn't sure if the ground had fallen away from her, or she had moved but the shock caused her to stagger, Rumlow stepping forwards to catch her. The world became a buzz of black and white, the only highlighted thing being the Soldier's form. She couldn't hear anything apart from his screams, not even her own voice screeching beyond the human level of hearing for them to turn the machine off, to make the noise stop. As he was being turned back to a robot, he was never more human.
Slowly the world came into focus and Mallory could hear herself. "Shut it off! Turn it off now! I'll break it!"
She charged out of Rumlow's arms her skin crawling with his touch and tried to yank the cord out of the machine; she slammed into two techs who pushed her back onto Rumlow's front.
His arms immediately encircled her and for a moment she forgot, sobbing into his sweaty and bloodstained uniform. She burrowed her face into the hard material, trying desperately to blot out the noise with memories of her childhood. Eventually she looked up to see the techs had left and the Soldier was lying back, panting hard. It was over but the screams were imprinted on her memory, the sounds of her Soldier being erased.
"It's hard for me too but it has to be done."
It came back to her with a blast. "Just-get-off-me!"
She staggered towards the Soldier, tearing apart the metal shackles with her hands. He was still but as she found herself cupping his cheek, he caught her wrist and quickly shot up to a seating position.
His eyes were blank and cold; her heart ached. "Who are you?" He asked in that quiet, cautious way of his like he had when they'd first met.
Mallory's mouth opened and closed, her throat feeling like it was too tight to speak to him at all.
"My name..." She swallowed hard and attempted a watery smile. "Is Dr. Smith. I'm your doctor. I have been for a while."
He let go of her wrist, his fingers leaving a white impression on her skin. She backed away from her, in fear of the way he was watching her like a predator with its prey, a cat to a mouse. Her skin chilled when she backed into Rumlow.
His hands grasped her shoulders. "Come on. We better get home."
She turned slowly, unable to stop herself. The Soldier's screams reducing to the back of her mind as the emotional baggage began to wear down her mind. It was too much. The bridge and the little boy, learning HYDRA's true nature, her father and Pierce and Rumlow's deception, the Soldier screaming for mercy as he was buzzed back to a clean slate... she hadn't meant to reveal to him that she was aware of his lying treacherous nature but she was afraid if she didn't, she would explode on him.
"Don't touch me." Her cheeks felt warm with tears and anger. "Don't you fucking touch me."
He opened his mouth to protest but she was backing away as if he was advancing to attack her.
"And don't deny it. I found the bug. Rumlow, I know."
His face went white. He ran a hand through his dark hair, and his eyes so bright and beautiful glistened with jewels. In the moment before he was about to confess to his crimes, Mallory had never loved him more.
"Mal-"
"Don't. Just don't... we're over. Whatever the fuck we were it's over."
He advanced forwards and tried to pull her into his arms. "Mallory, please-"
Her temper snapped; she shoved him as hard as she could and unleashed a fraction of her tidal wave anger to punch him like the Soldier had taught her. He staggered backwards, faintly rubbing his cheek as it began to redden under the weight of her fist.
"You're a monster." She was sobbing again, daring him to come closer so she could take out her anger and frustration on him. "I hate you."
I love you part of her sang as images of how he had constructed this deception played through her mind. But most of her were was filled with rage and violence towards him and organization that she'd face certain death if she ever left it.
Rumlow made a move to comfort her again, but he seemed to stop midway. With a face like clapped thunder he left the stormy room and it immediately calmed. Mallory crumpled, turning inwards, her legs weak as if she was about fall. She couldn't see nor think nor breathe. The tidal wave of emotions that had been building long before this crashed over her and left her stunned and submerged underwater. She was drowning, over the weight of her guilt and frustration and murderous rage.
"Mallory."
The voice was soft. She paid no heed then remembered; only the Soldier was with her right now. And she never told him her name.
Mallory turned her head to him and saw him looking at her, a deep crease between his eyebrows. Mallory wiped her eyes and sniffed, feeling as if she was crawling as she walked towards him.
"I never told you my name."
And then he said, "I remembered."
Her jaw clicked as it dropped open, the sudden floodgates of the pent up emotions curtailing at the sound of his voice. What could he mean? How could he have remembered? He'd just had his mind wiped! Mallory let out short laugh of disbelief.
"How?"
The Soldier tried to stand, legs shaking but staggered as he made his way towards her; Mallory moved quickly and caught him before he hit the ground. He was uncomfortable with the bodily contact but he allowed her to support him. His body was wet with sweat against her, pale and strong but shaking under the toll of the memory wipes.
"It was what you said to him... what you called him... you called me that." Mallory frowned, unable to remember and he hesitantly added, "In the... prison? You called me a monster too."
It all came back to her. The cold and anger she'd felt towards his admission that he'd do whatever Pierce would ask had made her angry enough to invade his personal space and hiss at him. And she'd called Rumlow the same thing. But why had that triggered it?
It clicked. Memory fragmentation. Zola's theory. The idea that a strong emotional sight, smell or sound could bring back memories that had been repressed. It had never been proven till now. And it added more guilt to her already world heavy pile; had her calling him that really affected him so much? He didn't look hurt when she'd actually said it.
Oh Soldier.
"Do you remember everything?" She asked eagerly, guiding him with her body away from the memory wipe machine. He looked to be in pain, the frown deepening and letting out a small soft sigh as she moved with him.
"Not everything. Little things. Flashes." He turned his head to her. "Did we sleep together?"
His voice was so low, so scandalous that even despite her current state Mallory laughed a real genuine giggle.
"Not like that." She composed her expression. "It was in the field mission we went on together, in the prison with the pregnant woman?" She couldn't say her name out loud.
He nodded slowly. "I don't know if I remember. I think... you delivered the baby, didn't you?"
She nodded back. "Yeah. Can you remember anything of your past life? Before you were-" She glanced at his sweat soaked forehead, his long shaggy hair, his half-murderous and half-confused expression that adorned his pretty face, his cybernetic arm with the Soviet star. "-this?"
He shook his head. "No."
Mallory settled him onto the examination table that was similar to the one they had shared so many monosyllabic conversations on back in the lab. She wiped his hair back from his face, him flinching under he touch but as her hand lingered he closed his eyes as if he was absorbing the moment. The light hearted tone of their exchange vanished and Mallory felt the guilt return, stronger then ever. Her face fell; she had did this. Not all by herself for sure but she had assisted into making the man what he was, to making this organization so powerful that it could get those Hellicarriers in the air and wipe out the population in a mass genocide. This entire situation she found herself, with a broken heart and aching limbs and a sore head, had been partly her fault. She couldn't help but muse on what her life would've been like if she hadn't of took the job. Without the job from Pierce, she would've been unemployed for a lot longer. If her unemployment had persisted like it probably would've in the current economic climate, perhaps she'd have lost the apartment due to shortfalls on the rent making her move in with her parents. Then perhaps she'd have to accept the crappy diner job her mother had pursued for her. Maybe she'd meet a nice man there, a blonde who asked to take her out to dinner; the total opposite of the dark haired and Italian ancestry of Rumlow. Maybe they'd fall in love for the six months and she'd find herself in a stable position with loving parents, a loving boyfriend and maybe even a cat.
And maybe she'd watch this drama fold out on the news, safely at home but thinking with grief of everyone who'd lost their lives.
But she couldn't dwell on the could bes and the might haves; this was the hand she'd been dealt and she just had to go with it. She had accepted the job, she had fallen so hard for a fake man, she had met the Soldier. Unlike others who went about their lives in an ordinary sense in a world which made sense and which she belonged too, Mallory had been pushed into a world of politics and darkness with a highly trained assassin currently staring up at her as if she was a puppy, a master spy who had rejected her help on the battlefield, and a devastating mission in a prison that had emotionally destroyed her. Do what is right, not what is easy her father had always taught her.
"I have to go." She mused out loud and the Soldier grabbed her wrist again, more gentle.
"You can't."
The silent admission that he needed her that was the undertone of his words was touching but she gently pulled his hand from her wrist and sighed. "I have to. If you want to get better, you have to let me go."
"How can I get better? They're just going to wipe me again." He looked a little frightened at the prospect.
"I need to find someone who might be able to remind you of your past identity." She stepped from him and ran a hand through her hair, searching the vast knowledge of people in her brain. "Someone who knew you..."
The image of a man in a uniform with a shield came to mind; the Captain. He had to know. That look on the highway was a look of pure fear, of recognition, of disbelief. If anybody knew anything about the Soldier, it was Steve.
"Who?"
Mallory sighed and rubbed her sweating palms on her tank top. "I guess I have to find Steve Rogers."
A/N: Part two of two is concluded. Hope you enjoyed!