Bella's POV

I had been pleased to discover Edward shared my passion for long distance, although apparently we had little else in common. That is until I discovered the delight he seemed to take in my pain, as I hobbled of the pitch letting out a low stream of swearwords under my breath I contemplated that last look on his face. Had it been contempt? He had already shown enough of that even though I met him only a few hours before, or sadness? If he was sad he hid it well, but for a moment I could have sworn it was empathy, maybe kindness. No, I thought shaking the thought from my head as quickly as it had entered.

Charlie was aware of my clumsiness and understood that it wasn't worth questioning me on my newly acquired limp. That didn't make the long walk home any easier though. As if the God's hadn't already been laughing at me it started raining when I was half way to safety giving me the look of a drowned rat. I wasn't so self consumed that I didn't notice a shiny silver Volvo drive past, with Edward Cullen's smug smile planted behind the windscreen that kept his perfect hair warm and dry.

The next morning past largely without incidence Edward and me seemed to have reached a sort of silent mutual hatred by the time adv. maths rolled by. Leaving me sat on the other side of the room from him. I thought I saw him smirk as I tripped on the doorframe entering the class but other than that we shared no interaction. I told myself it was better that way but really I think that I was searching for someone to fill the lonely void inside of me because I found myself contemplating asking to work on an investigation with him- needless to say I ended up with a weird looking boy called Eric.

In psychology we were asked to start a debate, it was a subject I feared but craved to hear more about- loneliness. "Loneliness is a creation of the mind, caused by the influences of society" Argued a boy, "Left to his own devices the human mind would be perfectly content to live a life of solitude, exempt from marriage and the romantic films that force feed us the deception of true love and happiness." He was wrong but I wasn't about to tell him that, loneliness was so much more than the monster society created to torment us, it was created and nurtured by the soul. That left a deep emptiness in my chest that never ceased even when I was surrounded by people. Loneliness was a far wider range than he had considered as well, it encompassed the fear of a life without meaning, the absence of friendship and laughter as well as the self hatred caused by the feeling of not fitting in.

I was lost in my own thoughts when a low voice spoke from the back of the class in reply. "Loneliness is not an invention of society, it is a real state of being, like love, like hate, like any other emotion you can feel so strongly it encompasses your existence. Loneliness is the inability to keep something or someone with us. It is not tree that stands alone in the middle of a clearing but the distance between the wood and the bark, between the leaves and the roots. Loneliness can also be more than an emotion, it's the way by which destiny endeavours to leave a man to himself."

I looked round amazed in the way a boy could justify and identify with my whole existence, but was shocked to find it was none other than Edward who had spoken. He briefly looked down as if embarrassed. My heart swelled as I realised that maybe, just maybe there was someone else like me, someone who could lead me back to myself. But then he ruined it just like he always ruined everything by looking up towards every one of the stunned faces in the class and bursting but into peals of laughter. Each giggle cut though me like an ice-cold knife chilling me to the bone, my eyes brimmed with tears and I struggled for breath as my heart felt like it was breaking over and over again. He was laughing at me, at everything I had ever felt and had ever stood for. What he probably didn't realise though was that he was also laughing at himself.

Even the teacher didn't know what to say as we waited for the lunch bell to ring, it did eventually though just as I was falling under the hypnotic spell of the clocks ticking. I pushed my head down as I crept my way along the crowded corridors to the lunch hall. This time I was careful no to sit where the Cullen crowd sat, a little more research had told me that Edward was a Cullen, and lead the gang of misfits I had seen the day before, they were nicknamed the Cullen clan although unrelated because they looked up to Cullen as a leader.

I chose an empty table and began to line up my lunch. Out of the corner of my eye I saw the misfits having a fight. The pixie like Goth was gesturing wildly and shouting at Edward. The geeky boy seemed to be siding with her but the blonde cheerleader I now knew to be Rosalie looked every bit as angry as Edward. I thought I heard my name mentioned and immediately shut it out focusing on picking at my sandwich.

I was so consumed with my task I didn't notice Alice the Goth sneak up on me. One second I was looking at the sandwich in my lap and the next I was face to face with Alice who had swung her dainty legs over the bench to sit next to me. "You look terrible" she said, "Thanks" I spat back at her preparing myself to leave in avoidance of any fight. "No, sorry I meant are you…" she trailed off. "Am I what?" I asked genuinely curious, encouraged by my softer tone she continued. "You looked sort of lonely, would you like to sit with us." And that was the beginning of the end. Wordlessly I packed up my stuff and followed after her dancing gait.

When I arrived at the table it didn't seem so rosy. Edward's face immediately flushed and he stood up jolting the table. "Alice what did I say!" And he left leaving the five of us staring after him so that was what they were arguing about I thought to myself me. After that conversation was halting at first Rosalie still seemed angry so I sat quietly eating m lunch. Then I heard the massive boy complaining, or Emmet as seemed to be called. "I've got math next, Edward said he'd help but now he's gone, who else do we know taking advanced math?" I was nervous but excited at the opportunity to help him, I hoped it would integrate me with the group further.

"I take advanced maths with Edward." I said shyly, the other looked a little shocked to hear my vice but Emmet was undeterred. "Can you help me with these quadratic equations, they're due in next period?" He asked. "Sure" I replied and pulled his book towards me. Pulling a pencil from my hair I began to write explaining to Emmet while I worked though the problems. N(n)=AN 2+ BN +C, "So A is the second difference, AN 2 is the second difference multiplied by N and squared, B is the value you multiply the number in the sequence by and C is the 0th term." I recited as I illustrated and ran through the first problem.

An intense look of concentration took over his rough features as I passed him back his exercise book, he looked for a minute and then another, his eyes seemingly uncomprehending, I had to suppress the urge to laugh. After what seemed like an age his mouth spread into a large grin, "Why didn't the textbook just tell me that in the first place? Bella you're a genius" He beamed at me and I could practically feel myself glowing with pride. After that conversation flowed easily after that and before I knew it the bell had rung.

Edward seemed to hold it against me though the looks he gave me in Biology and PE could've killed me, cold, hard and empty as they were.

That night as I lay in my bed I thought to myself let the nightmare commence, and they did. That was the first night my dreams were plagued my Edwards mocking laugh and haunting eyes. That was the first night his words resonated in my head like a broken record. That was the first night I dreamt of Edward Cullen.

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