Once again, I'm so sorry for the mistake of posting the wrong chapter. I hope when you read the right one it made up for it!
No time for a playlist, maybe I'll add one later! Enjoy!
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I sat in the destructed living room of my home, holding my father's hand as his body twisted in agony, the same agony I had felt when James bit me. The difference now was that Charlie wouldn't make it out of this alive. There were two variations of death that he could choose from. One was to simply die as any other human would; the other was to exist eternally as a hunter, constantly waging an inner war with his animalistic senses as well what he once thought was right and wrong. I couldn't help but hate myself for bringing this on Charlie. He wasn't ready to learn about immortals, let alone that his daughter was one. Charlie was fighting against the pain and he managed to say my name a couple times. I had to do this now; there was no time to wait.
"Dad, I know it hurts and I know it burns but you're going to have to try and listen carefully to what I'm about to say." His eyes met mine and he squeezed my hand. I turned my head away from him and took a deep breath. I could smell his blood but no fire rose in my throat. I turned back towards him and it took all the strength I had to look into his eyes. "This is going to sound crazy but please believe me. The woman that attacked you was a vampire, dad… She's an evil vampire that feeds on humans. When I was in Phoenix her mate tried to kill me but Edward killed him. The woman wanted to kill me as revenge and when she realized she couldn't, she came after you. I'm so sorry, Dad," I was now dry sobbing uncontrollably.
"I never wanted you to find out about this life but I have no other choice now. Dad, I'm a vampire too. I was attacked in Ireland and so was Aislinn. That is why I look so different." Charlie's eyes grew wide with disbelief. "We aren't normal vampires, we only drink the blood of animals and the same goes for the Cullens."
Charlie grasped my hand tighter. "I…love you," he said after a few deep gasps.
"I love you too, Dad," I whispered. I wasn't ready to tell him what I needed to say, I couldn't tell him to make a choice. I knew what he would choose and I wasn't ready to lose him.
"Bella, you have to ask him now," Alice whispered. I looked at her with frightened eyes. "I know it's hard but you have to do this for him and there isn't much time."
I turned back towards Charlie. "You lost a lot of blood when she bit you, Dad… You lost too much for me to be able to suck the venom out so that you can live without being a vampire. I can't decide your fate for you and I know you want to choose. You can either become a vampire or die. If there was another option we would have taken it but there isn't. This…fate isn't for everyone but if you want it we will be there for you and guide you through everything." It felt like my stone heart was fracturing into a million pieces and worst of all, those pieces were about to disappear.
Charlie took a deep, loud breath. "It's my time to go, Bells… I love you, I-I'm proud of you."
My body shook from the sorrow that I felt when I heard Charlie's words. "I love you too, more than anything. I'm so lucky to have a dad like you."
I glanced up at my surroundings; Alice was sitting, next to me staring at Charlie with grief-stricken eyes, Jacob was comforting Aislinn, Emmett and Jasper were standing across the room looking at me sympathetically and the Volturi were staring blankly at the scene in front of them, clearly on edge about being near Jacob even though he was in his human form. Everyone showed that they felt some sort of anguish, except for Charlie. He was so calm and he had stopped thrashing due to the pain.
"Jasper?" I whispered. He looked at me and I glanced around the room. He got what I was trying to tell him and sent waves of calm through the room. I half-smiled in thanks.
Charlie's heart beat was gentle and growing slower by the second. His eyes were fighting to stay closed and his hand was quickly becoming cold and weak in mine. Charlie's eyes met mine for a long moment before they closed, forever. My whole body ached and I screamed in frustration and pain. The sad howls of wolves were echoing out in the forest. Jacob left Aislinn's side and embraced me in a strong hug. I felt Aislinn and Alice both join in embracing me too.
"Bella, don't be sad. Charlie is in a better place now," Jake whispered as he kissed the top of my head.
"It's all my fault; I didn't even think to watch Charlie. I should have protected him. He would be alive right now and he wouldn't be tortured with the thought that his daughter is a fucking mythical creature."
Alice growled. "Bella it's not your fault. You did everything you could today. There were almost 30 vampires after you. If you hadn't been so brave and fought them all then a lot of people would have lost their lives. You're a hero, all of us here know it and Charlie knows it. I should have seen it earlier."
"No, Alice. This isn't anyone's fault but mine."
"It isn't anyone's fault but Victoria's," Aislinn said with force, Jacob and everyone else agreed.
That night the police came and deemed my house a crime scene. We had to tell them that Victoria got away. The explanation that she was now just ashes blowing in the wind wouldn't suffice. Alice, Jasper and Emmett went to stay at their place and invited Aislinn and I but Jacob insisted that we stay with him and Billy. I was glad that Jake had taken such a liking to Aislinn; it was a small silver lining in the midst of this horrible time. I politely demanded that Felix, Demetri and Jane return to Volterra with a promise that I would visit after Charlie's funeral.
I spent the rest of the week sitting at first beach, staring out into seemingly endless ocean and letting the guilt and pain consume me. I only moved when humans were by as well as at night, Aislinn said if I sat in the same spot for days without it seeming like I went in to sleep I would be suspicious. I didn't care if anyone found out what I was and destroyed me, not much mattered anymore but I listened to her. I ran by night, as fast and as far as I could. Running didn't bring me joy like it usually did but it numbed the pain temporarily.
The day before Charlie's funeral Alice and Aislinn joined me at the beach. They both seemed nervous but sat quietly next to me for hours until Alice said that she would give Aislinn and I some alone time.
"Bella?" Aislinn said softly. I nodded to tell her I was listening but didn't shift my gaze from the ocean.
"I wanted to talk to you about something. Jake thought he should do it but I insisted." I turned my head towards her. What would Jake and Aislinn need to talk to me about?
"Wow, you moved, thanks." She seemed shy, almost self-conscious about what she was about to say.
"What is it?" I whispered. The sound of my voice surprised me; I hadn't spoken in nearly a week.
"Jake is waiting in the trees in case you freak out but I told him he didn't have anything to worry about. So just don't freak out, ok?" I nodded, too confused to speak. "Well remember what you told me about imprinting and how everyone thinks it is so that they can have the best chance of passing on the werewolf gene to their offspring?"
"Yes." Where the hell is she going with this?
"Well that myth has been busted…Jake imprinted on me."
Staring at the ocean for a week must make a vampire crazy because I could have sworn that my sister just told me that my best friend imprinted on her even though they were born to be enemies. Wait a minute she did say that!
"What?" I yelled out of surprise. In a flash Jake was in front of Aislinn, shielding her from me. He's trying to protect her from me? This is beyond weird.
I rolled my eyes, "Jake, come on be serious. You really think that I would hurt my sister because you imprinted on her? Why would I think it's a bad thing if my sister and best friend are together?"
He shifted his stance from protective to casual and smiled.
"Well, we aren't together," Aislinn corrected. "I'm not entirely sure how I feel about the whole situation but I am very fond of him. It's still weird to meet someone for the first time and feel like you know them and it's even weirder that that person sees you for the first time and is in love with you."
I laughed and then sighed. "We live in some kind of screwed up soap opera, don't we?"
"Yes, I think even for immortals our lives are strange," she laughed.
Jake was standing next to Aislinn, looking at her like nothing else mattered. I'm sure that's what I looked like when I was with Edward. The more I thought about it the more I realized that Aislinn and Jake would complement each other perfectly. Her caring, motherly nature would balance out how childish Jacob could be and they each had a great sense of humor. I knew they would work out, even though the situation was unbelievable.
"Aislinn, can I talk to Jake alone for a minute? I know you'll see what we've talked about anyway, but I still want to do this the traditional way."
"Sure," she said before exchanging a loving glance with Jacob and then walking down the beach towards Alice.
Jake looked at me curiously. "What's up, Bells?"
"I know that your intentions are nothing but the best with Aislinn but I feel obligated to say a few things to you. I couldn't be happier for either of you. You are my best friend and have been for a while but she is my sister. You need to watch your temper because if you hurt a hair on her head, however unlikely it is, I will not hesitate to hurt you a thousand times worse."
"Understood," he replied.
"If she wants to be with you as just a friend, you will not pressure her or threaten anyone that she wants to be with to try and get them to stay away."
"You of all people should know that I only want her to be happy. If that is with someone else then that is fine."
"Yes I know, just make sure you don't scare anyone she likes off. If you ever leave her or break her heart, consider every bone in your body about to be broken so badly that it will take a month for you to heal."
"Bella, I'm not like him. You know that."
"Yes, I do know that. I just had to say it out loud so you know where my loyalty will be if she gets hurt."
"Alright, Bells," he said as he hugged me. "I love you and Aislinn so much."
"I love you too. So do we not stink to you anymore or what?" I laughed.
"Well she smells good but I wish I could say the same for you, yuck!" he joked.
Jake and Aislinn went off to talk to Billy. Good luck with that. Billy was somewhat understanding of my situation but I couldn't imagine what he would think about his son imprinting on a vampire. Alice came back over to me, still seeming nervous.
"Brendan has been calling you this whole week. Aislinn answered after awhile so that he wouldn't worry. He said you can call him if you need anything and he'll be here… He seems nice."
I sighed, I had totally forgotten about Brendan. I found myself kind of wishing he was here, he always made me feel better. "He is nice; he's a really good friend."
"I haven't told…Edward about anything. I haven't, well actually none of us have seen him since we left. I know he would want to be here and help you but there is still a lot that you don't know about what happened."
"If he wanted to be here he never would have left, but thank you for not telling him. I don't need him coming back trying to help me out of pity or charity"
"Bella, not everything is as it seems. One day you'll learn that but this isn't the time for that discussion. Carlisle and Esme want me to tell you they are sorry and they wish they could be here for you and Charlie."
"I miss them."
"They miss you too."
Eventful, tragic, joyous, trying, extraordinary…those words all could describe my existence. It was both providential as well as dammed, for reasons I'm sure one can understand. I couldn't help but wonder how much longer I would be on this roller-coaster. Maybe in a hundred years, when everyone that I knew that wasn't immortal had died, my life would become more peaceful. If the only disturbance I had in my life was the heart break I suffered due to Edward I would be glad.
Charlie's funeral was solemn. The skies were dark and of course, it was raining. A lot of people from town were there as well as the pack, Sue Clearwater, Billy, Aislinn, Alice, Jasper, Emmett, Renee and Phil. Saying goodbye to Charlie was so hard. The soft thumps of the rain on my umbrella reminded me of the tears I couldn't shed for my own father. Charlie made the right decision in my eyes, this was a torturous existence and definitely not for him. Afterwards Alice invited everyone over to their house where one by one they gave me their condolences. It was weird enough for me to be in this house, the crying people telling me that they were sorry made it beyond weird and uncomfortable. I wonder what they would say if they knew it was all my fault, that they shouldn't be sorry for Charlie's vampire daughter and her stupidity. They didn't know that though so the sympathy train kept on rolling. Aislinn and Alice were on either side of me at all times, ready to distract someone from any touchy questions they might have for me. The one person whose questions they could not protect me from was Renee.
I hadn't seen Renee since I left forks, a year and half prior. I had talked to her about once a month, always telling her I didn't call more because I was busy. Yes busy trying not to eat people. Renee was erratic but she was also observant. The first time I had talked to her on the phone after I was changed she immediately noticed how different my voice was. She said it sounded like bells. How fitting.
"Bella are you doing alright?" Renee asked as she pulled me into the kitchen after everyone but the Cullens, Aislinn and Jacob left.
"Yeah I'm alright," I said unconvincingly.
She grabbed my hand and flinched a little at the cold. "Are you really? You didn't even pick me up from the airport, Aislinn said that you were just sitting at the beach staring and that you had been doing that for a week."
"I'm sorry I didn't pick you up. I really wasn't ready to see anyone. What is so bad about sitting at the beach, no one gets hurt doing that."
"I'm not mad that you didn't get me, it's just not like you. Everyone says that you are blaming this on yourself. That's not right Bella; this is not your fault. Charlie and I love you more than anything and I hope that I get to see you before I go like he did. Your father was proud of you."
It is my fault! It's all my fault! I'm the one that Victoria was after, I'm the one that didn't hunt her down and kill her, and I'm the one that didn't make sure Charlie was protected. I ruined Charlie's life; he died because he was my father. I wished I could say that to Renee but I couldn't, so I said what was easy. "I know mom, I'm just having a hard time. You're right."
"I know, baby. Charlie was such a good man. He mentioned something to me on the phone a few weeks ago about how different you look. I was so surprised when I saw you, why did you get contacts?"
Here we go again. Though it felt like it lasted forever, Renee's visit was short, her and Phil had left the next day because she had to substitute a kindergarten class. I was relieved but I felt a little guilty for feeling that way. After she left I spent a few hours with Alice, Jasper and Emmett. I hadn't even said two words to Jasper and Emmett since they showed up. Emmett was still the same huge, teddy bear jokester and wanted to test out my 'so-called superior strength', as he put it. We went to the woods behind their house and Emmett place his elbow on a huge rock and called me forward. The match lasted less than a second, with me as the winner. Our friendship picked up where it had left off seamlessly, but I couldn't say the same about my friendship with Jasper.
Jasper felt extremely guilty and I didn't know why. The only thing he had ever done to me was attack me but that wasn't really his fault. I hadn't blamed him then and I definitely didn't now that I know how hard it is.
"Jazz, I promise you I have no hard feelings about it at all. I had actually forgotten about until you brought it up. I know how difficult it can be to control yourself but even before I did I still wasn't mad."
He sighed, "Bella it's not just that I attacked you… it's what happened because of that."
"Jazz, this is a tough time for Bella, maybe we should wait to have serious conversations," Alice interrupted. Then her face froze, she was having a vision. When she came out of it she was smiling but she had a hint of sadness in her eyes. "Tell Brendan I say hi and thanks for letting me buy the painting."
"I'm seeing him today?"
"Tomorrow…" she said while looking at the floor.
I raised an eyebrow at her. "You're not telling me everything, or anything for that matter."
"It's not my business to say, but I'm happy with whatever you decide to do."
"I'm totally confused, but thanks?"
The ride back to Portland was slower than I would have liked, Jake was following us in his car. I couldn't stop coming up with ideas about what was going to happen when I saw Brendan. I'd never seen Alice have a reaction like that. Aislinn was simply glowing; she was either already in love with Jake or close to it.
"So how long is Jake staying for?" I asked, trying to get my mind off Brendan.
"I'm not entirely sure. I can't imagine it will be that long; I will be very busy with school and painting. Plus he has responsibilities with the pack."
"Yay for makeup work!" I said sarcastically.
"Yes, hooray," she agreed. Then thought about something for a moment before speaking again, "I'm really curious…what do you think Alice meant about you and Brendan?"
I let out a huff. "Sometimes I wish my shield protected me from you seeing my memories. I was trying not to think about it, I'm totally stumped and it's driving me crazy."
"I'll be he's going to ask you to marry him."
"What?" I yelled and laughed at the same time. "You're delusional. We don't even like each other like that, why would he do such a thing?"
"I don't know, I was just guessing."
"Ok well that was the worst guess in the history of guesses. He'd be more likely to ask if I was a vampire." Aislinn and I turned to look at each other with wide eyes, we had both just realized something big. "Oh shit, you don't think he knows do you?" I asked, frantic.
"I'm not sure. What would you tell him if he asked?"
"Ummm…" What would I tell him if he asked?
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I had some writer's block for this chapter, so I'm not sure about it. Tell me if you think it sucks. I know, I'm a horrible person for killing Charlie but he would never want the vampire life/existence. When is that darn Edward Cullen going to show up? Man, he's slow! :P
Thank you once again to all my awesome reviewers: Divepup, deepcutfighter, marie potter riddle, Yana5, Anonyymus :), Ria Potter, apocalyps24, Spider-Hand, Lourdes08, oceanluvr, eclipsedbrunette, Kenai52503, Starlit Tiger, Bleached Kitty, omg444888, Shellii and MoonstruckManda. Even if you just reviewed to tell me that I totally screwed up and posted chapter 4 instead of 14, thanks. I didn't even notice until I saw the reviews. Thanks for all the support!
I'd also like to thank everyone that read my story, added it to their favorites and alerts.