Chapter 5:

The weeks blended into each other and they settled into a routine. They worked from home yet they still found ways to get time to themselves. She needed it more than he did. The more time he spent with her the more time he wanted to spend time with her. He was enamored with nearly everything she did. The way she nearly growled every morning before she had her coffee. The way she stayed up until she literally couldn't keep her eyes open. The way that she moaned just a little when she took a sip of her much loved hot cocoa and cinnamon. Every day he found something new to love about her. Which was terrifying for him because already he was sensing that his arranged marriage was becoming less and less only to protect her every day. Sure he would give his life for her but he was starting to want to share his life with her as well. The connection was there. He knew it. He felt it. Still he felt that she was hesitant to dive into a relationship with him. For some reason he was sure she felt like nothing he felt for her could be real because of his job as her protector. It wasn't true. Not by a long shot. Since they got to Charleston they had started taking classes online to learn marketing and every night they spent time together in front of the TV. They had similar taste in TV shows. Nights were spent binge watching all kinds of crime procedurals with a bowl of popcorn between them. A week before Christmas he found himself standing in the kitchen looking at the sparsely decorated room when she entered. "What's got you looking so serious Detective?"

"Nothing love. Just taking in the lack of Christmas spirit here in the house."

"I think it looks fine. I've never been much for Christmas."

"I haven't either but it might be nice to celebrate this year."

"Giving up everything you care about put you in the mood for celebrating does it?" While she was joking he couldn't help but feel the sting of her words. The days of thinking that he had given up for her were behind him and now he felt like he had gained more than he had ever lost. Clearly by her comment she didn't feel the same. "I've been alone for a long time. David and Mary Margaret have done their best to include me in their family but I've always been on the outside looking in. Forgive me if the fact that I get to spend this holiday season with a family of my own makes me feel a little bit hopeful."

"Even if you were forced to marry me to protect me? You still consider me the family you never had?"

"Emma you are not some obligation. No one made me marry you. At any moment I could have called it off. I chose this life with you."

"Why?" I don't understand."

"I needed something and it appears you provide that."

"What is it? Killian sometimes when you talk I feel like you're talking in riddles."

"I've explained my life to you lass. You know my background. You created a family with Granny and Ruby and I understand that you struggle with losing that. It was different for me though. As much as David and Mary Margaret tried to include me in their family part of me just wouldn't allow it. When I met you I felt like something clicked into place. I can't really explain it but there was a connection there that I hadn't felt in a long time. Perhaps it stems from being a bit lost. Your family left you. I was put up for adoption and then abandoned by the family that chose me. You're a kindred spirit of sorts. I felt it from the start but then when you shared your past with me I felt it even more. Emma, you are not an obligation for me. I don't want to push you but I'll not lie to you. You are more than friend to me. You are my wife and I'm happy about that. I hope that it will develop further. For a time it felt like it might, back when we first moved in, but if that's not something you want I won't push the issue."

"I don't know what I want Killian. I'm drawn to you but I'm terrified to open up. I'm worried that what always happens will happen again. I don't want to get close to you only to lose you." He could see the toll that the conversation was having on her and he didn't want to push. Her walls were down but trying for too much too soon could send them flying back up in an instant. "Emma, we don't have to move at warp speed. It's not unheard of for a married couple to go on a date. Why don't we try that?" His eyes were on the floor but they shot up when the sound of her laughter filled the room. "You're laughing?"

"You want to date me? You're aware I'm your wife right? Dating is to find out if whatever you're feeling can lead anywhere. We're already at the goal point."

"Wrong love. Dating is to get to know each other. I want to get to know you. I know your habits here in the house but we've never experienced what it's like to go out. To have a first date and the first date jitters. What do you say lass? Tomorrow at eight o'clock? I'll even pick you up."

"How noble of you. I'm sure my door is far out of your way."

"It's quite the trek for sure." She chuckled before twisting her mouth and bit and chewing on her bottom lip. She wanted to say yes. To give this thing between them a chance. He was right. There had been something between them from the first instant that they met. She was scared after their first night in the house. It had been too much too soon. So much had happened so quickly that she had retreated into herself. Their lives had been comfortable and cordial since there but she had intentionally kept herself guarded. Now though the desire to let the guard down and see what could come of it was nearly overwhelming. "Okay. What should I wear? Any ideas yet?"

"Dress casual. We don't need to make a big production out of it." She smiled before turning and walking out of the room. The conversation had been telling, and much needed, but now she needed some time to sit in the decision she had made. As much as she wanted to think that everything hadn't just changed she couldn't help but feel it had. It didn't necessarily mean the change was going to be bad but change had never been her friend in the past. It was hard to believe that it would be any different now.

Twenty four hours later found Emma sitting on the edge of her bed, panicking at the fact that it was three minutes after eight and Killian hadn't knocked on her door. Despite every bit of logic running through her brain it was the incessant screaming from her insecurity that her believing he had changed his mind. That he was questioning getting involved with a woman who was the primary witness in a murder case, on the run from a murderer with mob ties, and who had a baggage so heavy that Santa Claus would stumble under the weight of it. She couldn't really blame him but it was going to be awkward at the breakfast table the next day. He could have at least knocked on the door to let her know that he had changed his mind. Just as she was about to truly freak out she heard a rapping on the door. Without thinking she almost ran to the door, throwing it open. "Evening lass."

"You're late."

"Aye, I am. I wanted to do this right. Got stopped at a couple red lights along the way."

"You live here. Last I checked we don't have any red lights between the living room and my bedroom."

"I beg to differ. However I wonder how you didn't notice that I left about an hour ago."

"You did?"

"Aye. I did. I went to the store to get you flowers and to pick up a bottle of wine for us to share when we come home."

"I don't see flowers."

"They're in the living room. I was going to get you a bouquet but nothing I saw spoke to me. I ended up getting you a potted plant, which is more difficult to hide behind my back. Apologies love."

"I thought you were maybe standing me up."

"Seems like a bit of a bad thing to do knowing that we live together. Standing up ones wife is bad form." She smiled and bit the corner of her bottom lip. It really had been a ridiculous assumption, especially since he hadn't even a full five minutes late. "You look lovely Emma."

"Come on. I'm not dressed any differently than I am any other day."

"You look lovely every day lass." While she hadn't gone overboard with her appearance she had put a little effort into her look for the evening. Her hair, that was usually swept up in a messy bun on the top of her head, was loose in curls down her back. She had put on just a bit more make up than she usually did, although still maintained the more natural appearance that she preferred. She wore a pair of black skinny jeans, black strappy heels, and a white over-sized sweater. It was South Carolina but it was still just before Christmas and their house was located right on the ocean. While it wasn't Boston it wasn't the tropics either. "Well thank you. You actually cleaned up rather well yourself."

"Thank you love. Shall we?" He lifted his arm and she took it, a peace settling in her stomach. She had expected awkwardness. This was, after all, their first date. It was only natural that there were would be some trepidation as they navigated unfamiliar waters. When the reached the living room she saw a plant sitting on the end table and found herself gravitating to it. As her fingers caressed the soft petals he came up behind her. "It's an orchid. My mother used to tend them back in London before she passed. It was one of her loves, one that has followed me. I don't tend them as she did but they are my favorite flower. I thought that you might enjoy the beauty of one."

"It is beautiful. The purple is amazing. You're going to take on the task of keeping it alive though right? Since you know how to tend it? That beautiful plant will be dead in a week if I try and care for it."

"How about we do it together? I'll show you the finer points of caring for it. It will be something we can do together." A half smile crossed her face as she nodded, words escaping her for the moment.

"Shall we love? I had planned for us to go somewhere other than the living room this evening."

"Of course."

"As much as it pains me to say this love I would be remiss if I failed to remind you that tonight I'll have to be Colin and you'll have to be Jen. It may be our first date, and we shall act accordingly, but we have to assume the lives of our alter egos. For your protection of course."

"Role playing doesn't sound so bad." A devilish spark shined in her eyes as he looked at her and for a moment he felt the breath leave his body. She had flirted before but never so blatantly. He was always the one to use innuendo and seeing her open up and take a page out of his book was more rewarding than he had realized it would be. "Is that right lass? Well then let's get this evening started.

The night went better than he had planned. It was as if the world had stopped and decided that it was going to role out the red carpet for them. Christmas was in just four days and despite it being at least relatively warm the community they lived in was not lacking in Christmas spirit. Trees were lit up bright and as they walked past a church they could hear the strains of a Christmas carol filtering out into the street. He took her to a little Italian restaurant, Pan E Vino, where they had a glass of wine and easy conversation. He told her about growing up in London and she told him about growing up in the foster system. After the meal he took her to The Terrace Theater to see a movie. It was the perfect standard first date fare. For a night she didn't feel as though she was hiding out and sacrificing. She was just a girl seeing a movie with a guy she liked. For the most part she even found that she could forget that they were supposed to be newlyweds. It was only when she felt compelled to call him by name only to remember at the last moment that she needed to call him Colin that she remembered the reality behind their night out. The movie was the perfect time out. Emotions weren't her strong suit and somehow he knew how to just back off her when it seemed like she might be getting overwhelmed. That wasn't the case at the moment but he had planned an evening that gave her a bit of a break in the middle of it. Strangely though her emotions heightened during the course of the movie. She noticed every time he shifted in his seat or looked in her direction. She memorized the sound of his laughter. As unobtrusively as possible she observed him, mesmerized by the way he leaned in when things got intense as though moving closer would somehow change the outcome of the scene. His forearm lay on the divider between the seats and she wished that they hadn't gone to dinner beforehand so that popcorn would have been necessary. Somehow, of it's own volition, her hand moved towards his and she linked her fingers between his. She felt the surprise instead of saw it because she was certain he had refused to allow himself to react to her action. There was no doubt that she was the one that was going to have to make the first moves as he was allowing her to set the pace. The movie seemed to be over in a blink of an eye and before she knew it the end credits were rolling. She released her hand from his as she gathered her things but was surprised when he took it again once they reached the lobby. "I assume this is okay lass? I can stop if you want."

"No, I like it." She smiled shyly suddenly realizing that the night was probably over and they would be making their way back to their shared home. It was different from a normal date. He would drop her at the door but she had no doubt that she would sense his presence in the house. Most nights she did. "So, heading home?"

"No. We have one more thing on the agenda for tonight?"

"Oh is that right? And what would that be Mr. Henry?"

"I think you'll just have to wait and see now won't you Mrs. Henry?" She laughed as they stepped outside the theater and he waved down an approaching horse drawn carriage. It stopped and he stepped in, leaning out and extending a hand down to her. She took it and stepped into the carriage, feeling a bit like Cinderella. "You're really going all out tonight huh?"

This is every girls fantasy. Riding off in a horse drawn carriage with her very own prince charming."

"Is that what I am? Your prince charming?"

"Knight in shining armor at the very least. Came along and rescued me." He leaned closer and quietly whispered in her ear. "Make sure not to say anything that might give us away love. But please keep complimenting if you wish." Her laughter rang out through the carriage and he put his arm around her shoulder, pulling her closer. She bit her lip as she reached out and took his other hand in hers. The night felt magical, like nothing bad could happen as long as it continued. "I don't need to be a prince charming or knight in shining armor love. I wouldn't want to rescue just anyone. Only you. The title of your husband is all that I wish for." Her breathe caught in her throat, a tremble coursing down her spine. It was overwhelming, how he made her feel. Like it was all real, and there was no danger. "Kil.." She shook his head as he looked at her. "Lass..."

"Colin. Thank you so much for tonight." They sat quietly for the rest of the carriage ride, her leading against him and absorbing the peace that the night brought. When they arrived back outside the theater they immediately went the car and headed back to the house. He took her hand as they walked inside and a mix of anticipation and anxiety filled her. She knew what was about to happen. "Did you want to end the evening lass or did you want to have a glass of wine."

"Glass of wine sounds great. I'm just going to run to my room and change."

"Okay." She got to her room in seconds and closed the door behind her, sagging against it. "Get a grip Emma. Nothing is going to change. He's already shown you how much he cares. What more do you want from him?" She stood, changing quickly into a grey over-sized sweater and another pair of leggings, grabbing her black framed glasses off her bed side table and her cell phone. Back in the living Killian had grabbed two wine glasses and had settled down on the couch. "More comfortable love?"

"Definitely." She took her place on the other end of the couch, reaching out for her wine glass and stretching out laying them in his lap. "Well you've certainly gotten more comfortable haven't you?"

"I have. I hated pretending you were Colin tonight."

"Why? I am Colin, and Colin is me."

"I know. But when I talk to you I hate feeling like I'm faking. Is this what the rest of our life is going to be? Putting on a show every time we step outside our door? Trying to keep our stories straight?"

"It will be a challenge at first. But over time we'll have our real life to discuss. It'll just be two people sharing a life in public and in private. You are my wife. That's not a lie. Just because we're doing this backwards, marriage first and then dating, doesn't mean that it's not real. Do you think we're the first people ever to have what basically boils down to an arranged marriage? It used to happen all the time and love can grow from it."

"Can love grow from lies?"

"I've not lied to you. I promise."

"Was there anything more to why you chose to protect me than what you told me? People don't really just give up their lives for strangers."

"Aye love. There was a little bit more than I've told you. Would it be alright though if we held off on sharing that detail until another night though. This evening has been perfection and I'd had to ruin it with talk that could be heavy."

"It's nothing bad right?"

"Just additional motive love. Nothing shady."

"Another night it is then. I mean at least you didn't tell me nothing when there was something."

He took her right foot in his hand and began massaging it. "I'll always be honest with you Emma. You don't ever need to doubt that." In that instant she knew that he was being honest with her. Somehow despite the horrific thing she had witnessed the night that Bobby was killed she had stumbled upon something truly magical and rare. A man who would sacrifice for her, care for her, and be honest with her. It felt like a dream and she never wanted to wake up. Without thinking she set her glass of wine down on the end table and scooted forward so that her legs were draped over his and her arm went around his neck. She leaned forward and waited, her eyes imploring him to make the move. Without words being necessary he closed the distance between them, capturing her lips with his. The kiss deepened and she carded her fingers through his hair, drawing him closer and closer. Her breathing grew more labored and she felt like her heart was going to explode in the best way possible. It was him that pulled back, moving back to look into her eyes. "Let's go slow love. We have all the time in the world. I want to know everything about you." The corner of her lips tilted upwards, warmth filling her eyes. "I like that idea. I want to know you too. So as much as I have enjoyed this evening perhaps I should retire for the evening."

"Perhaps. Can I make you breakfast in the morning?"

"I would love that. Walk me to my door?" He didn't respond, simply moved her legs and reached his hand out to her. She took it and he led her down the hall to her room. At the door they stopped and without warning the butterflies hit her again. They had just been all but making out yet still by her door she could hear her heart beating in her ears. He leaned down and pressed his lips to her in the most incredible way possible. When he stepped away he tucked a stray piece of hair that had fallen into her eyes behind her ear and smiled, taking a step away. She didn't wait for him to disappear from view before going into her room and closing the door, pressing her back against it to keep herself from falling. This was only the first date and she had the strangest feeling that she was completely and totally head over heels. Even more surprising was how she wasn't frightened at all.