Chapter 13

Michael's POV

Preparing Lauren to seduce Steve Haines now seemed like child's play compared to the new task that was at hand, introducing her to my soon to be ex-wife and our children. Sure, I knew this day would have to come eventually if I wanted this to last, even though the thought of her and my children being in the same room made me feel physically sick because I knew it was going to be a disaster, but the day would have to come, and unfortunately it was coming sooner, rather than later.

I awoke to an empty bed that morning to my surprise, and the smell of food coming from downstairs and that was the sign that I knew this nightmare was about to unfold was soon to be upon us and all I could do now was get ready for the shit show that was about to unfold when both of my world's collided and hopefully afterwards the blonde my world orbited around would stick around after meeting the family, hell, I couldn't blame her a bit if she ran like hell from them. They weren't always bad kids, they were actually pretty decent growing up compared to the brats they became once we moved to Los Santos, although I'm sure I wasn't exactly innocent in there dissension into hellions. No, if you asked Amanda, I was the only guilty party involved in the matter, but all blame aside, the two brats I raised were about to meet the woman who may damn well be the love of my life, and you can bet if they fuck this up they'll never hear the end of it. I quickly snapped back to reality, got a shower, got dressed, and headed downstairs to embrace the shitfest that was going to be this day.

I made my way down stairs and heard laughter coming from the kitchen, instantly recognizing that obnoxiously cute laugh as my favorite blonde. There she was, pink lace dress, trying her best to look like the wholesome girl next door, cooking with Eva the house keeper. Both women consumed in conversation and keeping an eye on the food being prepared in front of them, when I entered the kitchen.

"Well, good morning ladies!" I said, getting a smile from Lauren and a jump from Eva.

"Mr. De Santa I told her it was my job to cook but she insisted on helping me." Eva said nervously.

"I couldn't let you prepare this whole brunch alone! Besides, it's been awhile since I've gotten to cook for more than just one person! Good morning Mikey!" Lauren said, leaving her pan alone long enough to walk around the counter and kiss me before returning to her spot at the stove, I shook my head at the sight. Never once did Amanda even offer to lift a finger around the house since we hired Eva and here Lauren is helping her in the kitchen. As much as I told her she didn't have to do these things, that it was Eva's job, she still insisted on doing them herself and giving Eva a much needed break every now and then.

"Excuse me, I must set the table." Eva said, grabbing dishes from the cabinet and heading to the dining room.

"So blondie, are you ready for this disaster?" I asked, grabbing a seat at the counter and grabbing a slice of bacon from the tray in front of me on the counter.

"I'm sure it won't be that bad! They are your kids, how bad could they be?" She said with a smile. Yeah, my kids, she has no idea how bad they could be.

"Honey you have no idea. I have to say though the innocent church girl look suits you very well!" I said as she stepped back from the stove to twirl around in her pink long sleeved lace dress.

"I figured since even though I am the wicked mistress of the east I didn't have to dress like a slut!"

"You aren't a slut, and whatever you do, don't let my ex-wife convince you that you are. You are the perfect blonde that I am head over heels in love with who I have no clue why she puts up with my old crazy ass, and don't you forget that kid!" I said leaning in for kiss, as the doorbell rang.

"Showtime." She whispered as she pulled away from our kiss and stepped back to straighten out her dress, as I went to answer the door.

"Good Morning-" I barely got out before I was interrupted.

"Yeah dad, so when are we going to eat? I'm supposed to meet some friends at burger shot to, uh, discuss some uh, homework, yeah. Holy fucking shit dad is that the chick you've been banging?" Jimmy said as he pushed passed me into the house and saw her standing in the other room helping Eva bring the food out. "She's fucking hot dad."

"Thanks Jimmy." I said trying to control my anger.

"So like when she gets tired of you can you put in a good word for me Dad because she is fine as hell with that big ass and them nice tit-"

"ENOUGH Jimmy." With all of the commotion with Jimmy I missed Tracey sneak by us and I looked up to find her laughing with Lauren. Laughter, a good sign, I thought with relief.

"You like HAVE to tell me who does your hair you color is totally perf!" I overheard Tracey ask her from the other side of the room as I turned to see Amanda walk in the door.

"So it seems the kids seem thrilled with your new pet. I'm sure they'll have a lot in common with her since she's a child just like them."

"She isn't that young Amanda!" I shot back, whispering to prevent the kids and Blondie from hearing us bicker.

"The kids probably have more in common with her than you, you lazy old miserable bastard." She shot back.

"Hi, you must be Amanda, it's nice to meet you." Lauren said approaching as cautiously after apparently hearing our argument, she stuck out her hand to shake Amanda's as Amanda rolled her eyes in disgust. Lauren quickly pulled her hand back.

"I'm sure you don't remember it, but we already met." Amanda fired back. "You were naked in bed with MY husband." Lauren's face went red and I could see the beginning of tears forming in her eyes.

"Brunch is served." Eva said, saving this awkward moment from getting any worse. Every one choose their seat at the table. I earned another eye roll from Amanda as I pulled Blondie's chair out for her, next to mine.

"So kids, I'm sure you know there's a reason behind this get together today." Amanda said, looking around the table, "Your father and I are getting a divorce, if you didn't already figure that out by the bimbo, I mean blonde, sitting next to your father at the table."

"Mom we all knew this was coming this isn't news. Besides aren't you sleeping with that yoga instr-"

"TRACEY!" Amanda shot back.

"Mom she's just saying, why are you being so hard on dad when you already have a boo thing too?" Jimmy asked, to an obviously frustrated Amanda.

"Because, I'm the good person, I deserve a hot young guy, but no I get that shitty hippy fucking yoga instructor while your father over here is banging super model blonde bimbo bitch when he doesn't even deserve it. I bust my ass, I go to the gym, I've gotten so much fucking work done and your father here, robs fucking banks, and is nothing more than a fat drunken slob and he gets to upgrade, well I have news for you Michael, soon enough your money will run out and that whore," Amanda spat, pointing at Lauren, "Will forget about your old ass and move on to something fucking better. Kids, lets go." She finished slamming her chair back and walking towards the door.

"It was nice to meet you both, I hope you will both join us again soon!" Lauren said escorting Jimmy and Tracey to the door.

"It was awesome meeting you, and don't listen to our mom she's just a bitch sometimes," Tracey said, "Hey dad, can we come over and hang out with y'all sometime?" Tracey asked, leaving me dumbfounded, my kids never wanted to spend time with me, unless it involved me spending money on them.

"Sure," I said as Amanda honked the horn "You better get out there before she drives through the fucking house. Good bye kids!" I waved from the table.

"Bye dad, bye Lauren!" They yelled back as they walked out the door.

"Well, that went…..well." Lauren said, laughing as she sit back down at the table.