Authors Note

It's been a month since my update today, but this will probably be posted later cause of my Beta, but anyway I know I should have updated but I just couldn't think of what to write and then I had a thought. Time to hear from Sophia, so I guess this might kill some of the suspense, but I really want to hear what you guys think of her and explain a little more about her.

Wolfie, No Seriously That's My Name

Chapter 5

Through A Virgins Eyes

I'm a morning person, one of the few lucky people in the word to be able to fully function in the mornings, but I have to be asleep by at least 10:30 at night, I literary can't keep my eyes open any longer than that. It's an impossible task.

Maybe it explains my dislike for parties, but I doubt it. I've just never liked them there's something about them, which irrupts to me, the whole idea: drinking, listening to loud music and dancing, more grinding really, and then if you don't do any of those things you're left to feel out of place the whole night. I always am the one that doesn't do any of these. Even my closet friends at least drink, and I can't really join in on conversations because people either want to hassle me for the fact I'm not drinking or are too drunk to bother speaking to.

Either way I dislike parties and like mornings.

Which is why I'm already up half an hour before I should be, and listening to Charlotte Church in my room. My Grandma gave me the C.D my last birthday, music she approves of really.

I like Charlotte Church, she does have a beautiful voice, my own mother didn't send me a present, which wasn't a surprise. Still I even try and picture what she would have sent anyway and I couldn't even think of anything she would know I wanted, is that sad? I know the answer of course, but sometimes I wish I knew she knew what I liked and always sent me the most perfect presents finding the stuff I didn't even know I wanted, but really did.

Of course I know that is too much to ask of anyone, but just once I wish I had someone that knew me better then I knew me. Not like that ever really happens. I twirl my purity ring around and stare at it. My Grandmother had it engraved and it says the word Pure. I stare at it, the whole point of this ring is to wait for the perfect person to marry so it'll be worth it, and if I don't find someone, then this would make it all pointless.

I'm saving myself saving myself for The Guy, most people don't know this but I do date. Well I will when The Guy comes along. I'm waiting for The One; I want all my firsts to be with The Guy and not some other guy that I regret it with. I want it to mean something, I know I sound like I've read one too many romance novels and all that, but that's honestly want I think. I'm waiting and I'm not going to settle.

I mean, sure I'm scared that the one won't come and I'll just end up dying alone, but how much bad luck can one person have. I have faith, faith that I'll find The Guy.

It's sad when I think about it. The Guy in my mind is always polite and sweet and caring and has baby blue eyes for some reason, and yet whenever I picture it these days Wolfie's head flashes through my mind. I know, I know, Wolfie as in Wolfie Fuller, I remember the first day I saw him, he was walking down the hallway with Jack and they both looked beautiful, of course nothing like how I pictured the guy in my head, but still heart stopping good looking, somehow though Wolfie just seemed more for me, and I honestly thought he was The Guy. It was like I knew he was something, like he and I would somehow just work.

I mean how stupid is that, of course that was freshmen year, and I soon learned what Wolfie was like. There's only so many times you can hear his name being bought up in the girl's bathroom, about how good a kisser he is and the occasional girl crying because he doesn't love her. He and Jack were the Heartbreakers of La Push High and I don't even think they know it, at least not to the real reality of it.

I'm pretty sure they live in this elusion where they think the girls don't expect any else from them, and each girl thinks that he'll see she's different just to find themselves crying in the bathroom. Not to mention all the constant fighting and getting in trouble at school, true Jack insinuated most of it, but Wolfie was always right next to him, they are as Thick as Thieves.

So I made a promise to myself to stay away from Wolfie because it was pretty clear he wasn't The Guy. The Guy wasn't a player or a rule breaker, he was sweet and gentle and funny, in an endearing way, and good looking sure, but in subtle ways. The Guy was just different, and Wolfie is in no way shape of form The Guy.

Besides freshmen year is all about learning, and I learnt that Wolfie was just trouble.

So, as you can imagine there's no story to it, after that he didn't even notice me, after all we're in completely different social groups, so why would he? Even after freshmen year I knew what he was like, I always sort of hoped he'd follow me and win me over, but that didn't happen, it's only now he's bothered to notice me and that was after I caught him making out with a girl in the sports equipment closet.

At first I thought it was because he wanted to make sure that I kept my mouth shut, but then he started helping out my grandmother for food and walking me home.

And then there was that stupid thing about me not wanting him to change I blurted out. I've never felt so stupid in my life, I mean come on, Wolfie Fuller I said that to, a legend at my school.

Why would he want to change in the first place?

And he bashed up Matt Ranger; I hate violence, maybe that's because of my past. The world past always feels wrong; it doesn't feel like it's in my past it feels like it's a part of me.

And he wants to be my friend; I mean he must know that I couldn't hang out with him.

It would just be too weird we're nothing alike, and violence, I just can't stand it, the idea makes me shiver at the thought.

It's so stupid to think about Wolfie, it's all so silly, in a week this whole thing will pass, he'll lose interest like he has with everyone else and the idea of being my friend will be laughable.

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At school, Will is the only one at our usual spot, I use to think maybe he could be The Guy, but there's just something about him that I know deep down makes him not the guy.

I mean Will is good looking, cute and sweet, but whenever I look at him I don't feel anything, no butterflies and The Guy will make my stomach freak out and turn upside down all that. Wolfie does that sometimes, makes my stomach freak out, well all the time, but I'm putting that down to the fact that he's so good looking.

God must have been in the best mood the day he made him, because he's beautiful, but maybe that's what you get when both your parents a so good looking. His mother is beautiful and is obviously unaware of it. I've seen her around and she always looks so pretty, the kind you would miss maybe, but I've always been observant. His Dad, well he looks like his Dad, besides his mother eyes that soften him and her smile, god he has such a heartbreaking smile, I have to stop thinking about this. I twirl my ring again, he is not The Guy, I remind myself.

"Hey," Will says, sitting up and smiling gently at me.

"Oh, hey."

"So, what you been up too?" Will asks. I look over at him, Will is really smart, he wants to be a doctor the kind of job I always picture The Guy will have.

I always have hoped maybe I will meet The Guy because of Will, will become friends with him at Medical School, it just seems like the perfect picture. You know meet The Guy through a friend, a nice smart friend.

But in all honesty it doesn't really bother me what The Guy does as long as he is The Guy, and treats me like The Guy will, you know love me, but I don't know, just somehow be perfect for me.

"Nothing much, Wolfie is helping my Grandma out," I say, sitting down next to him.

Will has never been a fan of Wolfie because Will thinks Wolfie thinks he's all that because of his parents and stuff.

Plus it upsets Will that all the girls go for those guys who just use them, at least that's what he said to me in freshmen year when he caught me starring ,that was when Will and I had first just become friends.

It was my first year in La Push and I still hadn't got use to the idea of how small the town was and how everyone knew each other, it was the same year I got the purity ring.

I really wanted a fresh start, and I had been asked by a couple of boys, and I kept turning them down because they weren't The Guy, so I decided to just make it official. I was waiting and it turns a lot of guys off the fact you won't have sex till marriage, of course The Guy won't care.

But I still kept saying no to guys who thought, well, they didn't think I would stay pure.

So I came up with the no dating at all, because in all honestly I didn't want to date anyone, but The One anyway so why bother with anyone else?

I notice Wolfie walking in to school; my stomach does that freak out thing.

"Hey," he says nervously as he approaches me.

"Um, I have to go," I squeak, and run off.

No, Wolfie is not The Guy. The Guy won't scare me so much.

Authors Note

I know it is short, but I didn't want to give too much away about Sophia. I felt like she was coming across as un-relatable and I hope this made her more real, and you guys like her. Please thoughts on Sophia I want to hear them.