Dosclaimer: Not mine. Still. Sadly...
Because You Loved Me
Part 7/?
Alice Cullen.
A.C.
Alice C.
Cullen. Alice Cullen.
"What are you doing?"
Alice closes the sketchpad quickly, dropping the pencil and folds her hands on the table innocently. "Nothing."
Esme grins down at her, arching a perfect eyebrow knowingly. "Trying out the new name?" she asks, sitting at the table and folding her arms in reflection of Alice's action.
It's been three days since their arrival.
"Yes. I quite like it..."
"Carlisle thought that since Jasper and Rosalie look so much alike, he could take her name. We spoke with her and, well, she isn't happy but she will get over it."
Alice fiddles with the corner of the sketchpad. "But Jasper already has a name. It's Whitlock. I only needed one 'cause I couldn't remember mine..."
Esme reaches out and places her hand over Alice's and pats it gently. "Alice, honey... we know Jasper has a name, and we have no intention of taking it from him. However, if we're going to appear to be a family, we must all present ourselves as relations in some way. Now that the family has grown from just Carlisle, Edward and myself, we've taken on the position of a husband and wife who adopt. Edward and Emmett Cullen - and now you, Alice Cullen - are all our adoptive children. We let Rosalie - who poses as a child from another family - keep her last name because of Emmett. They're together, in case you haven't noticed, and if they had the same last name, that would not work too well, would it?"
"So... you want Jasper to be your son, but you want us to still be able to be... together? Alice Cullen and Jasper Hale..."
"That's exactly my point, dear. It's easier for all of us that way, but... perhaps you should speak with him? He may be more open to the idea if he hears it from you."
Alice nods. "I'll tell him."
"Wonderful, but first... I wonder, would you like to go shopping with Rosalie and me? I noticed you only have one bag of clothes. Carlisle suggested we could get some furniture for your room, as well. You mentioned wanting a bed."
Shopping? Real shopping? "I'd love that, Esme! Oh... I need to get Jasper some things, too."
"Of course; we'll get you both enough to start a new wardrobe. I suspect he's roughly Edward's size, if not a little bigger. If there's a problem, we can always exchange."
"Will he be okay here? I mean, with Carlisle and Edward and Emmett..."
"Why wouldn't he be," Rosalie asks, floating swiftly down the stairs. "He can obviously take care of himself."
"Now, Rose..." Esme warns. "Remember what we spoke about."
Rosalie leans back against the counter and folds her arms, peering at Alice from behind her blonde fringe. Then, she sighs dramatically and says in a monotone drone, "Alice and Jasper are family now, and we're going to treat them that way and make absolutely certain that they feel welcome in every way, shape and form, and if I have a problem with that, I will voice it in an appropriate manner so that we can discuss it - as a family - and get the issue resolved."
Alice blinks, and Esme rubs at her forehead. "Yes, that's... word for word what we spoke about, Rosalie."
"You asked."
"She is your sister now, Rosalie, perhaps you should speak to her."
"...Hello, Alice."
"Hi, Rosalie. Your hair looks nice today."
"I know."
Alice sniffs and looks at the table. Esme makes a slightly exasperated noise and runs a hand over her face. "Well, now that that's taken care of... I thought we could go clothes shopping first."
"I certainly hope so," Rosalie says. "She can't go furniture shopping in that. I'll be in the car."
When she's gone, Alice can no longer ignore the belittled feeling in the pit of her stomach. "Esme..."
"She's not always this bad, Alice. Something you have to understand about Rosalie is that in her human life, she was an extremely materialistic girl. She's used to being beautiful, she's used to being the center of attention. The best thing to do is not take anything she says too seriously. When she tries, she's a wonderful person."
"Okay, Esme. I'll try..."
* * *
It was harder for Alice to leave Jasper at the house than she thought it would. She could feel anxiety from him - a firm sort of uncomfortable feeling at being separated from her. Ever since the moment they met, they hadn't been apart for more than an hour. Alice would be gone all day.
They took Esme's car to the shopping center, and Alice was gripping the seat beneath her for the entire ride. Esme tried to describe her by asking about how she and Jasper met, so she told the story of how she had visions and followed them. Rosalie stayed silent in the back seat.
When they arrived, Alice trotted to keep up with Esme and Rosalie's long strides - even at human speed, they were fast. The heels of their designer shoes make a rhythmic, almost deep and sophisticated sound on the marble floor as they made their way through the building.
Alice's flats squeak at various volumes as she tags along behind them.
"You shop here?"
"Quit gawking," Rosalie says lowly over her shoulder.
"Be nice. Alice, I thought we'd start in a simple store first. Then we'll work our way up to formal wear. Rosalie... you're the best here with cosmetics and accessories. Would you...?"
"I thought you'd never ask. I can't wait to get my hands on that hair."
Alice's fingers reach up to feel her short tresses subconsciously as she watches Rosalie disappear in the mass of people, her blonde curls bouncing with each step she takes. "My hair?"
"It's short, honey, but leave it to Rosalie; she can do anything when it comes to appearance. Now, you look like a size two or three... come on. I know the perfect place."
They circled the store three times, and Alice tried on six blouses, four pairs of trousers and two pair of ballet flats. She liked them all. Esme had told her to wait there while she took care of everything, and Alice had begun to admire a diamond bracelet on display on top of a glass counter.
She wanted it.
"Alice, no!"
Jumping slightly, she turns around and finds Esme hurrying towards her. She looks like a deer caught in headlights, with the diamond bracelet half hidden in her palm. "Esme?"
"Honey," she says, reaching out and prying the bracelet from Alice's hand. "We don't have to steal... oh, goodness, if someone had seen you..."
"We don't?"
"No, darling, we... oh." Esme holds her head in her hands, "Alice, Carlisle gets paid for his work as a doctor and I get paid at the museum... we buy our things properly."
Alice looks at her shoes. A feeling of shame like she's never felt before washes over her. "I am so sorry, Esme... it's just... habit... I didn't know, I-I..."
"It's okay, Alice. Really, I should've told you. I just assumed... oh." The woman sighs deeply. "Do you want the bracelet?"
"I do like it..."
Esme pushes the bracelet back into Alice's hand, then motions for her to follow. "I'll show you how to pay."
"Back already, Mrs. Cullen?" the girl behind the counter said with a smile. "Oh, is this the new daughter you spoke of?"
"Yes, this is Alice. She just turned sixteen, as I said before. It's too bad her last family didn't work out; it's so hard moving homes when you're as old as she is. This is a spree for her birthday and she's decided she likes this bracelet, as well."
Alice watches carefully as the girl scans the little plastic tag on the bracelet, and blinks slightly when the machine in front of her makes a loud beeping noise. "One hundred and fifty-seven dollars, and sixteen cents, please."
"Here, sweetheart. Take this cash... go on," She holds out her hands and stares as Esme pushes money into her hands. "It's quite easy, really... she's just learning," she says when the girl behind the counter shifts uncomfortably.
As Esme counts out the money, taking bill by bill and coin by coin from Alice's hand, she puts this process down to memory. In a few short moments, the bracelet is around her wrist. "Is it always that complicated?"
"No... there are credit cards. You'll probably fair well with those. It's a simple swipe-and-button process. We'll talk to Carlisle."
"I'm sorry I don't know these things, Esme..."
"It's expected, Alice. You didn't even remember your own name, how are you to remember how to count change?"
"What's in there, Rosalie?"
Halfway through the day, Esme and Rosalie switched Alice-sitting duties. Esme wanted to pick out a few things for Carlisle and herself, so Alice was ordered to go with her sister. Sister... it was strange to think she had one, in a sense.
Alice had paused in front of a window in which the mannequin wore nothing but two, teensy pieces of red lace. Rosalie smirks. "Lingerie," she says. "No self-respecting girl should be without it. You wanna go in?"
"Oh," Alice looks down at herself. "I-I don't think anything in there would fit me..."
It was true; the store looked like it was filled with pieces made specifically for a body like Rosalie's. Not hers. "Sure it will. You have a nice figure, you know... now that I can see it, instead of it being hidden beneath an old baggy potato sack."
Before taking her any further once Esme left, Rosalie had insisted that she change into one of the new outfits she'd bought. They used a bathroom stall to switch clothing, and once she was satisfied, Rosalie used some of the new product in her hair.
"Rose, really, I-I don't..."
"At least do it for Jasper. The man looks like he could use a surprise... come on." Alice couldn't protest before Rosalie was dragging her into the lingerie store.
"What do you mean, for Jasper?"
"Well, what do you think I mean? My Lord, girl." Alice stares at her, and only after a very long moment does Rosalie realize that the topic of conversation is truly a mystery to the girl. "...You mean you don't... you haven't..."
Alice blinks innocently.
"Oh, my. Um... wow, Alice, sorry. I just assumed you two were like, together."
"We are... I don't understand, Rosalie."
"You will," the blonde says, her expression softening considerably. "Trust me... give it some time. You'll know exactly what I mean. Still, we'll get a few things from here. You need some fancy undergarments, anyway. Makes a girl feel sexy."
Alice raises her eyebrows, and follows Rosalie to the petite section of the store. She and Jasper are together, she knows. She thinks. He's kissed her once, and he often holds her hand and hugs her. What "together" had Rosalie meant? ...She decides to ask Esme later.
* * *
"Oh," Alice says. "...Oh."
She and Esme are sitting at the kitchen table. The rest of the family were out hunting; the two of them had returned early. Alice had wanted to wait for Jasper, but Edward insisted that coming back to the house before him would be perfectly fine, that it was healthy to spend some time apart.
So, she had. She had also mentioned Rosalie's earlier cryptic words. Esme had explained.
"No... we... no. He hasn't even really told me he loves me. I know he does, it's just a hard thing for him to say..."
Esme nods. "I understand, sweetheart. From what I've heard of his past, I don't blame him. The time will come, Alice... you'll see. For him to say it to you, and to show you."
Alice picks at the edge of the table, and she starts to say something but the front door swings open and Carlisle, Edward, Emmett and Rosalie rush through the front door. Emmett is carrying Rosalie bridal-style, and Edward and Carlisle are laughing loudly about something. Esme smiles and stands to greet them, but Alice stays where she is.
"...Where is Jasper?"
Carlisle frowns. "Well, I thought he was coming back to the house..."
Alice stands, and gives him a look that says, clearly, he isn't here. Emmett sets Rosalie down. "...Did he say he was?"
"No, but--"
"Oh..." Alice pushes through her family members and rushes out into night, gasping as the heel of the new shoes Rosalie bought for her sinks into the mud. She retreats back to the porch and tugs them off, dropping them on the steps and hurrying out into the forest behind the house.
She stops, sniffs, and keeps running. She can hear her family members behind her, calling both her and Jasper's name, but she ignores them. I shouldn't have left him, she thinks wildly. If anything happens...
"Jasper, where are you?!"
"Alice..."
"Jasper!"
"What's the matter?" he asks, taken aback when she rushes towards him and presses her face into his chest, wrapping her arms around his waist tightly. "Alice?"
"I thought -- you didn't come back with the others, and..."
"What are you wearing?"
She sniffs and looks down at her lilac, knee-length dress. "Just some stupid outfit I bought today, oh, Jasper you scared me so much... where were you?"
"I needed more," he says quietly, "I'm not as easily satisfied as the rest of you, Alice, remember?"
"Yes. Yes, I remember, I just... oh. Don't do that to me anymore... I'm going with you from now on and--"
She can't say anything else because his hands on the side of her face and his lips are pressed against hers. She stands there on her tiptoes for a long moment, completely still from shock of being caught off guard. When she comes to her senses again, she stands higher on her toes and reaches up to tangle her hands in his hair.
"I'm sorry," he whispers in her ear after he pulls back and wraps his arms around her, lifting her up off the ground. "I didn't mean to frighten you."
"Doesn't matter," she mumbles. "Don't remember what I was worried 'bout, anyways..."
He grins up at her, and it's in that moment that she realises what Esme and Rosalie meant. She'd know when the time came...
She knows.
Alice wants this man; she wants him in more ways than she ever has wanted, or has ever had him, before. She wants him to be hers and only hers. She wants to drag him back to the house, to their room and she wants to make love with him for the entire night, and the next day, and the day after that.
"Alice?"
Alice gasps, curling her hands into fists on his back, gripping the fabric of his shirt in her fingers. She's blinded temporarily, and then she sees it. The future. But not the future she was thinking of. She sees her... small and dark, with wild crimson eyes and a vicious expression of pure rage and fury on her face.
Jasper's face returns to her, and Alice stares wide-eyed at him. He doesn't need to know, she thinks. Not now. Not yet.
And she won't tell him. She won't tell him because the future is subject to change. She won't tell him because she doesn't know the outcome... because she doesn't want to face the fact that it's probably truth.
She won't tell him that Maria will return.