Ironically I wrote this chapter in the hospital while my sister was being induced (first nephew YAY!). No baby yet but I assume it will happen tomorrow so chances are I will get at least 2 more chapters posted before D-Day.

In addition to this update, I am also working on the prequel to this story AND I already have plans for a sequel (that is if I don't decide to just keep it all as one giant story... still debating that one). The prequel takes place during Padme's intern year and while Anakin is in his last year of medical school. This means more insight into their beautiful yet short lived romance and marriage.

Enjoy!

-DFD

Chapter 10

The waiting room was half full when he walked over to the nurse's station on the main floor. Leaning over the counter he grabbed a tablet and pulled up his patients, checking on a chart to make sure the interns monitored her properly. Looking up he saw Owen walking towards him. "What are you doing here?" He asks.

Owen stuffs his hands in his pockets, "Dad's here to get his prostatic fitted." He said, "And we were going to see mom after."

Anakin nods his head, but both of them are silent and neither is sure how to continue, "Alright then," Anakin starts, "Hope that goes well." Anakin tries to leave but Owen calls out to him.

"Wait," He says, "Why… is it so hard for us to just talk?" He asks, "I mean, we're brothers-"

"Stepbrothers." Anakin corrects.

"What difference does that make?"

Anakin sighs, and rests his tablet on the counter, "Your dad married my mom." He said, "He makes her happy, which is what I want for her. After everything that happened with my dad, she deserves that." He shakes his head, "But none of that means you're my family. I get that you and your dad want a relationship with me, but I don't."

Owen lets out a small laugh, "I don't get you at all." He says, "What is so wrong with letting us in?"

Anakin lets out a sigh and looks him in the eye; "If you want me to let you in, if you want me to act like your brother and treat your dad like my dad; you're about ten years too late. The dream of having the perfect dad and the perfect childhood died when I was fifteen. Nothing you or your dad can do will change that." Anakin glanced at his watch and started to back away, "Excuse me."

[][][][]

The patient was recovering nicely and Ben was pleased to see she was already awake, though still drowsy from the medication. He smiled at her as he finished his exam and left her to rest. Anakin was leaning against the wall when he came out of the room, "Something wrong?" He asks.

Anakin gives a shrug, "Not really," He said, glancing down at his chart, "You took my surgery." He said.

Ben gave a shrug, "I figured with everything going on-"

"You don't steal my surgeries just because I had a bad day." He said, "Which one of us is the head of cardio?"

"You are," Ben answered, "But it was more than just a bad day." He argued, "Your mother is sick; I did what I thought was best for the patient."

Anakin pushes off from where he is standing and moves to tower over him, "You think I can't do my job?"

"I never said that. I just thought you'd want to spend time with your mother."

He shook his head and pointed his finger at him, "You don't decide that for me."

Ben raised his hands, "You think I overstepped-"

"You did overstep."

"But I had good reason to." He said, "You have a lot on your plate right now, I just wanted to help."

Anakin grabbed Ben's tablet and checked his OR schedule, "You have a valve replacement today, I'm taking it. You can do that appy Organa asked someone to do for him." Without another word, he handed the tablet back and walked away.

Ben let out a heavy sigh; he could tell things were going to be tense for him so long as his mother was in the hospital. He needed to talk to Padme and make sure she keeps an eye on him to make sure he isn't pushing himself too hard and to ensure he is in a good place emotionally to do his job. He's worried for him.

[][][][]

"You want me to do what?" Padme asked. She could not have heard what Shmi said correct. There was no way she would ask her to perform a surgery with only a 5% success rate.

Shmi smiled, and took Padme's hand, "I know why you don't want to remove the tumor." She said, "But I can't live like this anymore. I can't keep hurting Ani like this. It needs to end." Padme opened her mouth to protest, but Shmi ignored her, "If you can get the tumor out and I live, all the better. But if I die, then at least he won't have to see me like that anymore."

"Shmi, I can't." Padme said, "It would kill him if you died."

"It is killing him every time I snap at him and compare him to his father." Shmi looked at Padme and let out a sigh, "How much has he told you about him?"

She shook her head, "Nothing." She said, "I know they only met twice, but he didn't tell me anything else. I know he hates him though."

Shmi nodded her head, "You would too if you met him, believe me." She said with a smile that quickly died, "Ani has worked so hard not to be like his father. For me to say he is… it hurts him so much."

Padme shakes her head, "I can't." She said, "On any other patient with this condition, I would never advocate this surgery. Your tumor is too far progressed."

She nodded her head, "Yes, yes, I've heard this story at every doctor I've seen. I know how bad it is." She said, "And I don't expect to come out of it alive."

Padme let out a sigh and moved so she was half sitting on the bed, "If you don't expect to live, then why do you want to go through with it?"

She smiled at her, "If you can get it out with minimal damage, that will be fantastic and I will owe you a debt that I could never possibly repay. But if I die, it's a win-win situation."

"Except that you very well could end up dead," Padme reminded her. "Let's say I do the surgery." She starts, "If I end up killing you, what do you think that will do to Anakin?" She asked, "Do you think he would be happy to see you dead? Do you think he would forgive me for killing you?"

Shmi let out a tired sigh, "Padme, my death would be painful for him, I can't argue that. But the pain will fade in time." She squeezed her hand tightly, "As for you, I trust that you will fight for me more than any other surgeon. So even if the odds are only 5% like you said, I will go out knowing you gave it everything, that you tried to keep me going even after you're suppose to call it."

Padme shook her head, "I can't believe you're asking me to do this." She said, "Are you going to tell him?"

"Yes I am. Just before you wheel me off to the OR."

She let out a tired sigh; she can't do this. She can't do this to Anakin's mother of all people. Padme knows seeing his mother when the tumor is talking is painful for him, it is disturbing to her too, but what can she do about it? Dr. Farr would never do a surgery like this, how can she?

Shmi squeezed her hand again, "Go and think about it." She said, "But I would like consent papers right now I don't want the tumor to change my mind for me." Padme nodded her head and went to retrieve the papers and Shmi signed them without question. She even filed a Do Not Revive. She was serious about this. Padme posted the DNR sign on the door and on her monitors before giving the woman a small smile before leaving with the paperwork tucked neatly under her arm. She can't do this.

"Padme."

She turned sharply, tucking the paperwork behind her back before she relaxed, and saw it was only Ben, "You startled me," She said.

"Apologies," He said, "I was hoping I could catch you before you before my appy."

Padme raised a brow, "You took Organa's appy?"

Ben sighed, "More like your boyfriend gave it to me." He said and she laughed, "I was hoping I could talk to you about him, actually."

She let out an exhausted sigh, "I already told Dorme, just because he's living with me does not mean we're having sex."

He raised a hand, "Uh, I wasn't going to ask about that… but I will spread the word for you so the gamblers will leave you alone." He said, "I'm actually worried about him."

"Worried? Because of his mother?"

He nodded, "Yes. I just… I think you should keep an eye on him. This is obviously a delicate situation for him. I think he needs someone by his side through this."

Padme nodded her head, "Of course," She said.

Ben leaned over to the side, getting a small glimpse of the papers behind her, "What are you hiding?"

She lets out a sigh as she shows him the consent forms, "Shmi wants me to try to remove the tumor."

"That would kill her."

"That's what I told her." Padme said, starting to walk down the hall with Ben at her side, "I don't want to do it, but she is asking me,"

"You have a right to refuse treatment if it is too great a risk."

She sighed and shook her head, "I know that."

Ben stuffed his hands in his pockets, "You're considering it."

She nodded her head, "The reasons she gave… they make sense. But if I do it and she dies, Anakin would never forgive me." She lets out an awkward laugh, "She seems to think he will though."

He gives a shrug, "Maybe he will." He turns his head to look at her, "If this were a cardio procedure and the patient wants to do a risky procedure, Anakin would do it. This should be no different."

She shakes her head, "Yeah, well I don't take risks like that." She said, "With procedures like this, where the odds are so low, I only take the risk if I am confident I can do it. I don't think I can."

Ben moves to block her path, standing directly in front of her, "Is that because of the risk? Or because its Anakin's mother?" He shakes his head, "You wouldn't be considering it if there wasn't even the slightest chance that you could do it. Look at the scans again- have Farr look at them again. And if there is a chance, maybe you should take it."

"What about Anakin?"

He shrugs, "He'll be angry; angry that you did the surgery, angry if she dies… Maybe it will end things with him… or maybe this will bring you both closer."

She scoffs, "How would me killing his mom bring me closer to him?"

"It's a test." He said, "You both know how she is suffering- him more than anyone. And you both know that you will fight to keep her alive if you can. He knows you won't just give up until the very end."

Padme shakes her head, "Sounds like a pretty crappy test then."

Ben smiles at her, "Perhaps, but it's not like you have to take it." He looks down at his watch, "Just take care of Anakin," He says before he turns and walks away to do his appendectomy.

[][][][]

Padme spent the rest of the day with Dr. Farr going over Shmi's scans. At first they both agreed the risk was too great. But at closer inspection they saw there was a chance- a small chance, but it was still there. The two of them sat huddled over piles of research and even ordered new scans on Shmi so they have a more recent image of the tumor to examine. They had been so absorbed in the work that Padme even ran down to Anakin who was working on a valve replacement to tell him to take the apartment key from her purse because she was working late. He had rolled his eyes at her but agreed they would see each other back home.

By the end of the day, they concluded that an aggressive surgery gave her a chance- and that if Shmi wanted it, it was worth it. They spent a few extra hours coming up with the beginnings of a plan before deciding to call it a night. They would tell Shmi the news in the morning. But Padme was going home to her son… Farr suggested keeping it quiet until tomorrow, and while she agreed that was the best protocol, she hated the deception.

Walking through the front door she kicks off her shoes and lets out a tired sigh as she stretches her tired limbs and makes her way deeper into her apartment. She forgot to eat dinner and was starving she can't wait the few hours before breakfast. Opening the cabinet she pulls a bag of chip and takes a bottle of water out of the fridge. Sitting at the small island she opens the bag and starts to eat. She doesn't Hear the footsteps behind her and jumps when she feels arms wrap around her waist and lips press gently into her neck, "What are you doing up?" She asks.

He smirks into her neck, "I heard you come home," He said, "You sound tired." He drags his hands up her spine to her shoulders and kneads them softly.

She moans at the feeling and leans into it, "You're tired too," She points out.

"Yeah, but I didn't just get home at one in the morning." He says, the humor in his voice evident. Leaning forward he presses a soft kiss to her neck, "Let's go to bed." He says. Padme reaches into the bag of chips and takes out a handful before rising from her seat and letting Anakin wrap his arm around her and walks with her to the bedroom. Padme is so tires she doesn't even bother changing into her pajamas, opting just to sleep in the shirt she has on and her underwear. Climbing into bed, she leans over to Anakin who was currently on his side facing her. Leaning over him she presses her lips to his, his hand coming to cup her cheek as she deepens the kiss and he responds. They pull back after a moment, and she runs her fingers through his hair, "I love you." She says.

He smiles at her and kisses her again, "I love you," He says but Padme shakes her head.

"I mean it," She says, "I love you. Please, just remember that. I love you."

He furrows his brow and sits up, his hand coming to cradle her neck, "What's brought this on?"

She shakes her head, "I just want you to know," She says, "I truly, deeply love you." Anakin isn't sure how to respond to this. He could tell something was bothering her, he imagines it must be something that happened at the hospital- something a patient said maybe- so he does the only thing he can do. Pressing a kiss to her forehead he shifts so he can lie down and Padme turns away from him but stays in his hold. Wrapping his arms around her he holds her tightly, providing what comfort he can.

[][][][]

The next morning when they came into the hospital, Padme told him that Dr. Farr wanted to talk to him and his mother about her tumor. He had tried to get her to explain more, but she said that she had to talk to Farr before pre-ops. Anakin was worried what her silence on the matter meant, but he would find out soon enough. He made his way to his mother's room where he found Cliegg, Owen and his girlfriend, Beru already waiting. His mother smiled at him and he saw she was still in a good mood this morning.

Padme and Dr. Farr entered a few minutes later. "I'm glad you could all make it," Farr started, "Dr. Amidala and I have done extensive research on your tumor and we think there is a slight chance that we might be able to take it out."

Shmi smiled, "That's wonderful," She said, "When can we do that?"

"Hold on, mom," Anakin interrupted, "What do you mean by slight?" His eyes were trained on Padme, the disappointment evident in his eyes.

Padme shifted where she stood, "Originally, the surgery has a 5% survival chance."

"Yes, I know that." Anakin interrupts, "That's why surgery is not an option."

"But after looking at the scans and research again, we have found that there is a way to get to the tumor. It's small, but it increases the survival chance to about 7%." Padme glances at Farr for a moment, "Dr. Farr thinks its worth the risk, and I agree."

Anakin shakes his head, "No," He says, "No surgery, that is out of the question."

"Anakin," Shmi starts but Anakin cuts her off.

"You will die." He says, "You will die if you go through with it."

Owen places his hand on his shoulder, "But she might not." He says, "It's a small shot, but it's still there."

Anakin pulls away from him roughly; "You don't have a say in this." He says, rounding on Padme, "How could you of all people think this is a good idea?"

"Because there is a chance." She says, "She wants this."

He shakes his head, "I won't sign the consent forms."

Padme sighed, "You don't have to. She already did." Padme showed him the form she signed yesterday. The look on his face is one of betrayal and she can't help but feel that that is exactly what she did, "Ani, she wants this," She whispers.

"Who will be doing the surgery?" He asks.

Padme glances at Farr and he nods his head, "We both will." He answers, "If I have any chance, I need the best by my side."

Anakin looks at Padme for the entire time and several moments after, his mind still processing what was happening. When she reached for his arm he pulled back and left the room. Padme watched him leave and one look from Farr told her she could go. Racing after him she called his name several times but he kept walking.

"Ani-"

"How could you?" He demands, "You're basically agreeing to kill my mother."

"Ani…" Padme tries to grab his arm again but he backs away from her. She lets out a sigh, "I didn't want to do it at first."

"Then why?"

She gives a shrug, "She asked me to." She says, "I looked at the scans again, and told myself 'no' because of all of these reasons but they all boiled down to 'because she's your mother'." Padme shakes her head, "When I looked at them with Farr, I realized that there is a chance. Shmi knows the risks. She knows she could die. But the tumor will kill her eventually anyway."

"So you don't even care that you could kill her, all because 'she'll die eventually'."

"Of course I care!" Padme all but shouts, reaching for his arms she grasps his sleeves and doesn't let go, "I care that this is your mother I'm operating on. I care that you might hate me if she dies. I care that this might ruin everything we have." She takes a deep shaky breath and blinks back the tears that are threatening to fall, "But I can't give less than what I would normally give to my other patients. If there is a chance, and they want to take it… I have to try." She lets out a sigh and shakes her head, "You're not thinking about this right."

He scoffs, "And how am I thinking about this then?"

"You're thinking like a family member." She says, "You're not thinking about this like a surgeon."

"I am family-"

"But you're also a surgeon," She interrupts, "You know what it's like, you do high risk surgeries almost as often as I do them."He tries to pull away but she holds on tightly to his coat, "I love you." She says, "I love you and I don't want to hurt you… but I have to do my job." She lets go of his sleeves and he starts to walk away again, "If it were my father," She calls, "If it were my father lying on your table with a small chance to live, would you do what I'm doing?" She sees him stop in his tracks at the scenario presented but he neither turns nor says anything. After a moment's hesitation he starts walking again.

Dr. Farr comes to stand behind her and places a hand on her shoulder. He doesn't say anything. No reassuring words, nothing to distract her from what very well might have been a silent break up. She takes a moment to compose herself before turning to Farr and nodding her head, "Let's, uh… let's work on finishing that plan."