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YUU ARE SO PERDY YUU ARE SO PERDY YUU ARE SO PERDY
Kanda pulled the bandages tighter one last time before deeming it acceptable and allowing his patient to button up her uniform. He and Lenalee were currently kneeled behind a large dumpster, catching their breath as they prepared to make one final run to rescue their comrade. The game plan… was absolutely terrible, in the Japanese teen's opinion. The two exorcists would find a group of the military men and knock them out. With any hope and a lot of luck, two of the uniforms would be close to the correct size. Lenalee and Kanda would proceed to dress themselves in the uniforms (stupid) and somehow manage to sneak/walk into the building where Baka Usagi was being held, navigate to the prison cells, grab Baka Usagi, and then escape with their heads.
It's a great plan, according to Lenalee.
That's how the duo found themselves behind the dumpster about an hour later, donning the blue military uniforms of Privates Gregory Smith and Sarah Lin, who were both hidden further down the alleyway with blankets the exorcists borrowed from a clothesline. It truly wasn't the most flattering on the two fairly attractive teens. Private Smith was a small, chubby man whose uniform was sweaty and smelled of cigars. Private Lin was very, very tall (although she was the same…. width as Lenalee) and seemed as if she really did love the smell of her flowery perfume. The author will leave that imagery here for you to giggle about to your heart's content.
Kanda glared at Lenalee as she put her shoulder-length hair into a military-style (at least she hoped) bun. "Kanda," she started. "You should do the sa-"
"No." Kanda was not a religious man (funny, considering what occupation he held). But for God's sake, he was already trapped in this tiny, suffocating uniform. There was no way that he was going to tie his hair into some kind of… man bun. There was a limit to how far he would go to rescue a comrade, and that was it. No.
Lenalee frowned at him, but knew that she lost the fight. "Let's go, then." She said, exiting the alley with Kanda close behind her. They were about two and a half blocks from where the older exorcist thought the main building was. Unfortunately, being that close to a military base meant that there were a lot of soldiers loitering about. However, it was more the civilians that were giving the two odd looks. Thankfully, Kanda worked as a shield and directed his 'I will eat your soul' glare at them. They made sure not to look that way anymore. By some stroke of luck, the two were able to maneuver through crowds and made it to the front gates. "You would think it would be better guarded." Kanda nodded his head, agreeing with Lenalee's whispered statement.
"Don't question it and keep moving."
MUSDANG MUSDANG MUSDANG MUSDANG MUSDANG MUSDANG
"Wow, we've really made a lot of progress. I would say that we're pretty much best friends."
Edward's eye twitched in time with Mustang's. The Xingese man turned his glare onto the young state alchemist, provoking a silent conversation between the two.
Why did I let you convince me to bring him to my office?
"This couch is super comfy! Can I have my scarf back?"
Because he said that he knows where the other two might be.
"Maybe could I have my jacket? Puh-lease! It's getting cold in here! I want to put on all my clothes!"
Mustang turned his attention back to the bouncing ball of energy (were those rabbit ears?). As annoying as the child-stuck-in-a-man's body was, he (and his comrades) were extremely valuable to the Amestrian military. If the colonel could be the one to bring all three – maybe four – in, there was definitely a promotion in his future. So when the Fullmetal Pipsqueak (Damn you, Colonel Bastard!) had broken down his door saying that the idiot knew where his comrades were, Mustang jumped on the chance. The red-head, Lavi, if he remembered correctly, hadn't shut up in the ten minutes he'd been in the office.
"Fullmetal says that you know where your comrades are. I suggest you sit down and talk before I have Lieutenant Hawkeye come in here." As he said this, Lavi grew slightly paler. No doubt he was remembering when he was attempting to proclaim his innocence.
"Ah, location, location, location. They may or may not be on their way out of the city."
"And they wouldn't come for you?"
"Nope, Yuu-chan hates me. When he doesn't want to do something, not even Lenalady can change his mind."
He's lying.
LOVELY LAVI LOVELY LAVI LOVELY LAVI LOVELY LAVI LOVELY LAVI
Ah, the pros of purposely lying badly.
Mister Japanese-man (Colonel Mustang, as his desk plaque read) picked up on it. Lavi had shifted his view towards the ceiling, as if trying to avoid eye contact, and bit his lip. Kanda and Lenalee were already here, although Lavi couldn't tell where exactly. It seemed that the Innocence wanted to be helpful, but not too much. After all, we wouldn't want the exorcists to have an easy time doing anything, would we?
Plastering a cheeky grin on his face, Lavi looked at Fullmetal. That's kind of a weird name, but also pretty cool. It probably came from the metal leg that made a soft grinding noise at random times when the teen was moving. Golden eyes stared back at him before flicking to his hands. Ah, so he noticed that the exorcist was twirling Tettsui around his fingers. Observant, seeing as how his superior hadn't. The blond opened his mouth to say something, but stopped when Lavi performed a one eyed wink at him. Fullmetal narrowed his eyes and glanced at a walking, talking suit of armor, but was silenced when Mustang started to speak.
"What does the symbol on your coat mean?"
"A symbol of our Lord, Timcanpy."
"Where are you from?"
"Nunya. It's pretty close to Bidness, maybe you've heard of it."
Suddenly an explosion rocked the building. Mustang's next question was cut off as he and Fullmetal raced for the window. Lavi was right behind them, cursing as he saw the five level one akumas firing sporadically in the courtyard. The exorcist turned on his heel and strode towards the door. As he made his way towards where his Bookman intuition (definitely not the author's) told him where the door was, Lavi could faintly hear a "He's gone!" and three sets of running footsteps.
When he had entered the other office where all the other soldiers worked, no one really made a move to stop him. Lieutenant Hawkeye had her hand reaching towards the holster on her hip, but it seemed that everyone was in some kind of shock. After all, who would dare launch an attack on the main military building in the middle of the main city in the middle of the country? Lavi had decided that he wasn't going to look a gift horse in the mouth and had continued on.
A few minutes and one almost deadly wrong turn later, he was standing outside the front doors. Craters were everywhere and unfortunately there were more than a few empty blue uniforms. Other soldiers who were (hopefully) unconscious laid splayed out in random locations. They had probably been thrown from the force of an explosion and knocked their heads. Every now and then a round of gunshots could be heard, echoing around the city. It never did much more than creating sparks on the armor of the floating akumas. The same creatures that had now turned their attention to the red-haired exorcist. Away from the building, away from the building! Lavi jumped down the steps and drew most of the akumas' fire away from the probably very expensive to repair building. The Black Order would not be happy to receive that bill.
"Ozuchi Kozuchi! Man, man, man!" The now gigantic hammer demolished two of the akuma, causing them to explode in a cloud of dust. Lavi dodged another bullet, turning to hit two others. However, he was stopped by one exploding into dust and its friend (can akuma have friends?) smashing into the ground with extreme force. And then he heard the voice of a Lenalady. "Lavi!"
"Yuu-chan! Lenalady! You came for me!"
"Shut it, Baka Usagi!"
Apparently the last akuma didn't like being forgotten. It simultaneously fired at the exorcists and at a crowd of curious civilians that had gathered. Kanda's voice cut through the air.
"Move!"
LENALEE LEE LENALEE LEE REPETITIVE LENALEE LEE LENAELEE LEE
The three seemed to vanish as they moved in different directions to avoid the bullet. Lenalee went in the direction of the civilians. If I'm able to get there in time, I might be able to deflect it…. Or take the hit. As she neared the group, something she saw in the corner of her eye made her slow. A bolt of fire was streaking towards the bullet as fast as she had been moving and, in front of the civilians, a thick wall of concrete was rising from the ground. The wall had strange blue lightning arcing around it. The bolt of flame connected with the bullet and caused it to explode, sending bits of shrapnel and dust everywhere. Lenalee turned her attention to the last akuma, which was being suspiciously silent and still.
"~Lord Millennium is in search of you…~"
She was swinging her legs back and forth, twirling an umbrella around her hand.
~"Looking for the heart now, have you heard the news?~"
Striped stockings complimented the gothic Lolita style dress she wore.
Road Kamelot smiled at the trio.
"Hello, exorcists. Or should I say good morning? Probably good evening, but then that makes me sound like that vampire exorcist. Anyways, Millennie asked me to tell you that. I wanted to see Allen, but he's not here." The Noah twirled one slim, gray hand in the air and a door appeared behind her. "Bye-bye, now! I'll be seeing you all very soon." She leapt from the akuma, jumping into the unseen space beyond the door just as Kanda sliced the akuma down the middle.
"Che." He grunted, sheathing Mugen. Lenalee let out a sigh of relief that she didn't know she was holding. Even if level ones weren't a challenge anymore, it was always a little… sketchier when a Noah appeared with their minions. They should really be thankful that it wasn't a level three or four.
EDWOAH EDWOAH EDWOAH EDWOAH EDWOAH EDWOAH EDWOAH
Mustang was almost completely useless.
That's the conclusion that Edward had long since reached. The idea had formed in his head the first time he had walked into the office and saw Lieutenant Hawkeye holding a pistol to the colonel's head because he didn't want to do paperwork.
Like he said, almost completely useless.
Sure, he was a great alchemist and all, but it also seemed that the Flame was terrible at catching people.
The three 'convicts,' as they were being referred to again, had shared one look and suddenly Lenalee was flying away. Lavi and the girly one were sailing through the air on a… hammer? What? None of this makes sense.
The two males landed on the closest rooftop and bounded across it. By this time, Mustang had taken of and was racing after the trio. And of course, Edward and Alphonse were right behind him looking for a chance to slow down the two that were grounded.
Just as the brothers saw their chance and went for it, the runners somehow managed to take to the air by leaping off the either of the walls that were forming on both sides of them. Similar to what the girly-man did earlier, they reached out their hands and were picked up by a very fast Lenalee. Before they disappeared, an "Are you calling me fat!?" exclamation came from Lavi.
Three teenagers had escaped three skilled alchemists (two that were State Alchemists) and played a part in pretty much destroying the courtyard of Central Command.
Damn it, Edward cursed silently, I'm on clean up duty.
MUSDANG MUSDANG MUSDANG MUSDANG MUSDANG MUSDANG
This was very, very strange.
There were several Amestrian military uniforms (nine, Mustang counted in his head) that had been found during cleanup in the courtyard. It was as if the men and women who owned them had simply vanished without a trace. The only unusual thing on the uniforms was a strange, dark silvery powder that had almost been mistaken as concrete dust during the first inspection.
Nine people, gone in the blink of an eye. No one knows where they went and most are assuming the worst.
Then there was the question of what those things were. Similar to how the nine disappeared, those five creatures (if they could be called that) had apparently appeared out of nowhere.
It was times like this that Mustang wished he had been out there to see what had really happened. Because the witnesses the military questioned were absolutely crazy. One older gentleman had said that one of the creatures burst from a woman and shed her body much like a snake shed its skin. Another woman said she saw a soldier disintegrate into ash after being hit with a bullet. That would explain the powder on the uniforms, though, so the Flame Alchemist didn't completely write that one off. But the man sounded crazy. It almost warranted a background check from the colonel, honestly. You know, see if there was a history with drugs.
Just in case.
Mustang ran a gloved hand through his messy hair. This incident had created a new mountain of paperwork for everyone. And at the same time, more specialized and better equipped teams were being put together to search for the trio of teens that had destroyed the creatures with surprising ease. The higher ups really, really wanted that power on their side.
YUU ARE SO PERDY YUU ARE SO PERDY YUU ARE SO PERDY YUU ARE SO PERDY
It would be really nice if everyone would shut up, for once. Kanda's eyebrow twitched as Lavi continued to talk about the most random things. A kid with a metal leg, almost getting shot, and someone who apparently sounded like the Japanese exorcist. It was getting ridiculous.
After fleeing from the military base, the three had returned to the abandoned farmhouse. Lavi had volunteered for the first watch, but neither of the other two were getting any sleep. "I can't believe you called me fat, Lenalee!"
"I didn't! I said that it was heavier than my usual get away load!"
"That's pretty much calling me fat!"
"Baka Usagi, you're fat."
"Yuu-chan! You're so mean to me! And Lenalee! Did you betray me for Yuu-chan?"
Silence enveloped the group (mostly due to Mugen resting peacefully at Lavi's throat). They stared into the small fire that the red-haired accommodator had built. "Guys," Lenalee started, "where do you think Allen is?"
"Ah, Lenalady, you know how Moyashi-chan is. He's probably worked his way into someone's heart and is eating them out of house and home." Lavi grinned at her while Kanda snorted.
"Che, he probably got himself kidnapped. Or killed."
"Kanda! You shouldn't say that!"
IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK
"~Who is it that has my heart? I will find you soon.~"
That's a wrap for this chapter! I'll only be using Japanese for Kanda's insults and any Innocence or weapon names that merit it. The biggest example is Lavi's Innocence in this chapter (Big Hammer, Little Hammer. Grow, grow, grow!)
I'm letting you guys kind of decide how Allen is found. I'm not going to say anything further on this, but pick one of the four and either message me your choice or leave it in a review.
Clown
Crystal
Briggs
Scar
Bad news? I'm working every day this week. Good news? I'll be writing almost every day this week.
Have a fantabulous day. Word actually recognized that as a word. Sweet.
Read and review! Hope you enjoyed!
Captain Jap