Some days were better than others. There were the days where all I could even think about was how high I had the ability to get later, and how much I could drink before passing out.
Then there were other days, where I would continually drink, but it wasn't as much as I usually drank by a long shot.
It was on those days when I couldn't seem to be drunk enough…
Almost like today.
I was walking (more like staggering) back from the bar to my house, when I bumped into something strange.
I could feel cloth, and skin. I hadn't bumped in to something but someone… I sensed his shaggy beard… If you could call it that. It was more of five o'clock shadow… Was I really that close to feel it though?
I sensed some buttons, and I felt a buckle press up against me. Two strong, muscular arms wrapped around my waist and picked me up. What was he doing?
Even in my drunken state, I most certainly was not stupid and I did not appreciate being touched in such a manner… And by someone I didn't know? Was it someone I didn't know?
As I said, there were days when I got too drunk to feel anything at all. And unfortunately, today was one of those days in which I could not have been drunk enough. Even though my mind was foggy, I felt painfully alert. It was like someone was hitting my mind with a jack hammer, but some painful force was keeping me awake. I must have done something seriously wrong in a past life…
I felt something hit me… Or me hit something…
Faintly, I could feel my ribs cracking and a pin went up both my legs. I must have been kicking… Hard. I fell (or was thrown) into something quite hard… My whole body was vaguely aching as I felt something… Or someone… On top of me.
I could feel my belt being removed from it's previous position, and I could feel something sliding down my legs… Rough… It was denim. My Jeans! He was pulling off my jeans! Something silky followed, sliding off my legs… Was that…?
My underwear! I started shivering lightly, foggily hearing someone else's pants being unbuttoned and pulled off… My attacker?
My mind searched unsuccessfully for this word… I knew what was happening… I was being hurt, and something told me that it wouldn't just stop at that. Something deep in my instinct told me that more was going to be taken away then given…
My body shook as the cold swept across my currently bare body. I could feel goose bumps rising on my arms and legs. The wind was beating against my already aching body. I felt my body being invaded… Hands on my breasts, running all along my stomach… Something sharp suddenly entered my most sensitive area… A knife?
It felt cold, but I could sense my own blood running in a pool between my thighs. I felt my body being torn apart as this someone entered me, thrusting into me several times.
I seemed to not be able to find my voice… I couldn't scream, and every time I opened my mouth his lips invaded mine…
He stood up finally, after bruising me, and cutting me deeply and painfully in several places… And he left me.
Left me to die in my own pool of blood…