Chapter Ten - Desperate Times, Even More Desperate Measures
Blackmail Boles. That's all it was going to take. A little bit of threatening and then me and the Joker were on the express train out of here. And I was going to do it with pleasure. I mean, come on, the smug bastard had had it coming for him since the day we met. It was all so easy, too easy in fact. I didn't know why I hadn't gotten into extortion sooner, it was hilariously fun!
My merry humming was cut short by Crane's observation.
"I haven't seen your so called 'monster-lady' in two days now." He noted without looking up from his gourmet meal.
"So?" I asked disinterested. Deep down I was slightly surprised that he actually paid attention to my rants about Arkham and our fellow inmates. In all honesty half the time I didn't even pay my words any attention, I just enjoyed venting out my anger.
"In Arkham, minutes are weeks. It means she's probably dead."
Well Quincy had been looking for a replacement for Strange, I guess he hadn't gone too far to find one.
My thoughts of Quincy brought my mind back to the freakish mystery of the card and the cake. If it was true that it hadn't been the Joker, then somebody else had saved my skin.
I looked suspiciously towards Crane. But instincts told me it hadn't been him. He hated me, so why would he give me a slice of cake? It didn't make sense. Unless, he had given it to me to brag about how delicious the staff food was. But nope, I still didn't buy it.
Who even cares? I'll be out of here by tomorrow. I forced my brain to forget about the whole enigma. I currently had more important things to focus on.
"Why would I care?" I queried, grimacing as I fished a long strand of grey hair out of my lumpy porridge, holding it up for inspection before dropping it to the floor. As if the taste itself wasn't enough to gag at. It was hard to believe that the people who prepared the staffs and Crane's food with such care and affection, were also the ones who were in charge of my meals. In my opinion, they contaminated it on purpose, it was the only reasonable explanation.
Crane looked at me now with suspicion, "I thought since you were too scared to step into the shower room because of her, you'd be pleased."
"'Scared' is a pretty strong adjective. More like 'cautious'." I said, pretending not to smell my own bullshit. "Nope, it makes no difference to me."
Well, not anymore, it doesn't.
To try act more natural to Crane's probing eyes, I ate a heaped spoonful of sludge. But it was a huge error. I spent the next minute with tears streaming from my eyes as I attempted to not choke on the gruel as it traveled down my oesophagus at a snail's pace. I even felt it stick to my stomach lining like wet cement.
"What happened to your neck?" he questioned after I had finally managed to compose myself again.
I nearly spat out some of the remaining porridge left in my mouth.
"Wait. Did you seriously just notice it now?" I scoffed in disbelief.
Thanks to the Joker, the whole of my neck had turned bright blue. And that wasn't an exaggeration. The whole thing was actually bright blue! But the colour, and the discomfort created when it was touched, was just a small price to pay for an eternity of freedom.
"No, I saw it straight away. I just didn't care," he admitted, painfully honest. "But now you are acting strange, I want to know."
"Strange, in what ways?" I scoffed again, pretending to take offense to possibly the mildest insults he had thrown at me during the last week.
His eyes narrowed, "You are happy."
"Can't a girl be happy for a change?" I said, jumping to my own defense.
"You haven't once complained about the food." He added.
"Well, not aloud."
"But most of all," he said, saving the best observation for last. "You haven't mentioned escaping. Not even once. And I would place bets that your behaviour has something to do with that strangulation mark around your neck."
Damn, busted.
"Yeah, you're right." I admitted in defeat, sensing that more I denied it, the further he was going to dig. With Crane sometimes it was better to confess. It didn't mean that I was going to tell him the whole truth though. Not in a million years. I was in the process of racking my brains for a plausible reason why I would be happy for having a swollen neck, when Jonathan handed it to me on a silver platter.
"They've increased your morphine." He nodded smugly pleased with his own deduction skills. His facial expression and tone didn't bother to hide the fact that he thought I was a complete junkie.
It was so very tempting at that moment to admit to the truth, just to watch the arrogance drain from his face, when I realised that they had indeed increased my morphine supply. And all because I had asked them too.
You see though, I was nothing like the addicts you see cluttering the streets of The Narrows. Not in the slightest. I could stop any time I wanted to, I just chose not to. In fact, I would get clean as soon as I was out of the Asylum. Then my mind would be completely straight when I was focusing all my energy on revenge and Sionis.
No more drugs as soon as I was out. I made a pact with myself.
Well actually, maybe some. I thought, immediately getting doubts. Just a tiny bit of morphine, on occasions. For the special events, to make everything brighter. Just a little dosage to help me relax. Perhaps, maybe even just a small dosage to help unwind at night. But apart from that, I didn't need it at all. None whatsoever. I could stop in a moment's notice.
"Maybe." I said tensely, feeling hot flushes of anger on my cheeks. Frankly I was sick and tired of his superiority complex which I had been subjected to for a week. Somebody, one day, who wasn't Bats, needed to put him in his place.
He pushed his tray to the side of him, folded his hands together and leaned over the table like he was a shrink again.
"Would you like to talk about it?" he asked sarcastically, his crystal eyes holding nothing but cold mocking.
And that's when I finally snapped, and tried to scoop his eyeballs out with my spoon.
"Ow! Not so hard." I whined, whilst being dragged violently by the arm down the corridors towards my cell. I shouldn't have complained though. Of course Frank Boles' reaction was to going to be digging his fingers into the flesh of my arm in order to hold me tighter.
I hissed out in agony.
"Always knew you were a brainless bitch, but you've really outdone yourself now." He chuckled darkly. "What do you think'll happen next time you see Scarecrow? You retard."
Well it looked like somebody wasn't up-to-date on what is politically correct.
But he had had a point though. If I ever saw Crane again, Scarecrow would be sure to retaliate. It didn't matter that my attack had failed in even connecting the spoon with his eye- in my rage, I may have forgotten that he had indeed been wearing glasses, only seeing red. Boles was right, I was dead if I saw him again. So very, very dead.
So it was a good thing that I wouldn't.
"Who says we'll meet again?" I asked him, as he stood unlocking the padlock to my cell door.
Boles opened it, but thought twice about pushing me in and walking away.
"What are you on about, you crazy bitch?" he asked pushing me into the doorway of my cell, one hand resting on the door, threatening to slam it in my face, and his other hand resting characteristically on his dreaded Taser which I was already familiar with.
I lowered my voice, and smirked, "A certain croc, and a certain crooked Guard."
Yup, that's right. You heard me. Apparently there was a cannibal beast that lurked in the depths of Arkham, and Crane hadn't been lying. Who would have guessed it? Certainly not me.
Boles froze in shock, dropping his hand from the metal door.
"So that's what the Joker was telling you so slyly." He said eventually, shaking his head in disbelief towards himself for not realising it sooner.
"Tell me Boles, what do you think will happen once the Press gets a load of this? An inmate too dangerous for society to even know about, and the Guard who let them off the leash to try get a promotion. Sounds like some front cover shit to me. Stacy Gleeson will be talking about this story for weeks."
Boles just raised his eyebrow, seemingly unafraid, "Oh yeah? And how do you think you'll manage to tell them?"
I grinned back, "Sorry to break it to you, but you aren't the most likeable person here. Any Guard in this shithole of an establisment would be willing to rat you out once they find out the whole story. I mean, you did endanger all of their lives. Plus, think of the amount of cash the Press would pay for a story like this. Secrets. Betrayal. Greed. It's got more themes than a fucking Shakespeare."
Boles shrugged casually, "Yeah, you're probably right. So this is the plan, isn't it? Try force me to let you and your clown buddy walk free?"
"Ehh, yeah. That's exactly what I was going to do." I frowned questioningly at myself, Boles' calmness was completely throwing me off my game. I was pretty certain that this wasn't how normal people reacted to being threatened of getting exposed.
"That was a pretty solid plan." He admitted. "Could've worked well too."
"Could of?" I repeated, now completely confused.
"Well let's get this straight. You haven't actually told any Guards yet. Have you?" his released his grip on his Taser in order to fold his arms across his chest arrogantly.
"Well, I've told you." My eyes flickered up to his face trying to understand what he was getting at.
"So no." he snickered, finding this whole situation darkly amusing. "See, if the Joker tells anybody, who would believe him? The psycho isn't known for his truth telling. But with you? Well, people might just think-twice. So the solution is pretty simple. You die."
My whole body turned to stone, paralysed from my stupid error. I had been right, the plan was too easy.
"Nothing personal," he trailed off for a second before admitting, "Who am I kidding? This is completely personal! Truth is, I've wanted you dead for a while now. There's something about you that just rubs me up the wrong way. You don't even need to speak. The fact that you're still breathing pisses me off."
My memory led me back to the ride to Arkham when I had disrespected him in front of Cash, and not only that but Cash had defended me. To a person as power mad as Boles, he had probably been craving revenge from the get-go. The odds had always been stacked against me.
"So I could kill you now. It's tempting. But after what happened today, looks like I don't need to get my hands dirty. Scarecrow will do the job better than I ever could, tea-time tomorrow. You should've seen the last person Scarecrow got at in this shithole of a place," Boles laughed reminiscing. "He didn't quite kill them, but he brought them close. So fuckin' close. You know what we had to do? Put them down. Like they were a dying dog. Maybe the same'll happen to you. Huh, bitch?"
"Bastard." Was the only word I could whisper out.
Boles just laughed, and kicked me in the stomach sending me flying to the floor in the middle of my cell.
I choked, my lungs trying desperately to refill with air after getting it sucked out from me.
"You know, I wasn't actually going to tell you this. Didn't want to make your life worse than it already is. But now? Now, I think you've deserved the right to know." He said, speaking over the sounds of my heavy coughs. "Want to know how I knew where you were when you were butchering that Nurse? Your clown-friend told me."
My eyes nearly popped out of their sockets.
"Liar!"
I sprung up and charged at him. He slammed the door shut, and once again I was sent flying back into my cell.
I felt something wet run down my face, it was blood. A whole goddamn lot of it. My hands held onto my nose, trying unsuccessfully to stop the bleeding.
"Surprised?" Boles laughed.
I shuffled away from the door into the dark corner of my room, trying to escape from Boles and his poisonous words.
"No, no, no." I said frantically, some of the blood running down from my nose seeping into my mouth. "He wouldn't do something like that."
He would do something exactly like that. My mind admitted.
"Sounds like you don't know him that well after all, Princess." I could hear Boles' grin in his words. "I'd be lying if I said it was nice knowing you. See you in Hell, bitch."
I spat out my mouthful of blood aiming skilfully at the gap in the door, but none of it had hit him. He had already left.
In less than twenty four hours, I had managed to go from the happiest person on the planet to the most miserable. How the World loved to toy with me.
"You have a lot of nerve coming here." Crane seethed at me, threatening to unleash his Mr Hyde, when I sat opposite him again for our meal. I had figured there wasn't any point prolonging the inevitable. If I was going die, I may as well do it when I had lost the will to life anyways.
"Yeah, I'm a complete idiot." I agreed earnestly, full of self loathing from my critical mistake that I had made yesterday. "But in my defensive, blinding you was going to be my parting gift."
Crane held back his wrath, swallowing his spiteful words, suddenly growing curious.
"Parting gift?" He asked, his eyebrows lowering sceptically.
I shrugged stiffly, "It doesn't matter anymore. I'm going to die in this dump, either by you or by Boles. I don't know which is worse."
I laughed sarcastically, hiding my fear with craziness. Sometimes in life it was easier to delve into madness than face up to reality. My sudden realisation made me feel slightly guilty for having judged so many inmates in this place.
"Alice. Focus." Crane snapped at me, breaking his cool demeanour. "What are you talking about?"
Having already lost all hope, I figured I may as well just come completely clean. It wasn't as if I could get any more repercussions from my actions. So I confined Crane with everything.
"My bruise, it's from the Joker. We were planning to escape. Long story short, now I'm going to die. And he'll live happily ever after in some lunatic ward in Metropolis."
The bastard, I cursed him in my head bitterly.
"They're moving him?" Crane frowned suddenly.
"I was so close." I groaned out ignoring his words, putting my head in my hands with utter defeat and despair.
"Focus!" Crane nearly shouted, making me jump up in my seat. It wasn't like him to be so tense, he was usually so uncaring and calm. "Are they moving him? Answer."
"Yes." I sighed out from under my hands.
Crane swore aloud.
"What's stuck up your ass?" I asked angrily looking up from my hands, cross that he was acting that the World was ending when he was perfectly dandy. I felt that I was the only person with the right to true misery.
"You!" he pointed at me accusingly, as if it was all my fault. "I was just using you to get myself acquainted with the Joker. You have ruined everything."
"What do you need to get acquainted with the clown for?"
"So we can team up together, to get rid of Gotham's pesky bat problem." he was nearly red in the face with fury.
Oh yeah, he still didn't know.
"Well, there's no need to be melodramatic." I scoffed at him. "I hardly am the one who decided that he should get transferred."
"No," Crane agreed. "But I bet that you messed up the escape plan."
"Barely." I lied.
I had thought the plan would have gone swimmingly, figuring that since I grew up in The Narrows blackmail would have come easily to me. But it had turned out that blackmail was far more complicated than I had first thought. And it wasn't so fun either, at least not when it turned around to bite you back in the ass.
Crane rubbed his forehead, as if trying to defend his brain from stupidity that he felt was contagious. Calming down into his usual cold and collective attitude, as he did so.
"Right," he said finally, burying Scarecrow deep inside of him so he could have full control of the situation. "We need to get out of here."
I couldn't believe my ears, it was about bloody time!
I jerked up in my seat in excitement, and then cautiously queried, "What happened to not wanting to leave?"
Crane looked me dead in the eyes before answering, "If the Joker is leaving, then so am I."
I knew he was obsessed with the clown! I felt like doing a fist pump into the air, but controlled my urges.
"When will we escape then?" I asked eagerly, my fingers dancing along on the table top, creating a tuneful beat from my obvious glee.
Jonathan stared at me for a moment, before permitting himself to let out a few chuckled breathes.
"We, as in the Joker and I. There is no you."
The beat stopped.
"But you said you needed me to get acquainted." I quoted directly.
Crane nodded absorbing my point, "But that was before. I don't need you now, not since I'm going to break him out."
"You're wrong," I argued. "See, the Joker wants me and him kept together."
"Of course he does." Crane shook his head, smiling slightly with disbelief, thinking it was another one of my pathetic ploys to get out of here.
"It's true."
It was true!
"Go on," he encouraged me sarcastically, wanting another chuckle at my desperation. "Tell me why."
I sighed agitatedly, wishing that I had been more successful when I tried blinding him with a spoon. It didn't take much for him to do to piss me off.
"Listen, it beats me. Your guess is as good as mine. But all I know is that, for some reason, when he got caught in the hospital, he got me caught too. By all means, try escape without me. I'm telling you, he'll come for me."
I hope.
Crane searched my eyes for lies and then gave in.
"You can come. But if I find out that you're expendable to him, I will relish in terminating you." He threatened lowly, his eyes hardening.
No pressure then, I gulped, momentarily wondering what would happen to me when he found out that the Batman was no longer a threat to Gotham's criminals, and he could have escaped at any point during my stay. Nothing good, that was for sure.
"So what's the plan?" I questioned, trying to distract my mind from the many possible gruesome outcomes of his wrath.
"I'll cut the alarm system, steal the keys, and we will all walk out of here."
"You're joking right?"
And he thought I was an idiot.
Crane scowled at my judgement, "It's worked before for me."
"Yeah, that was when there was one of you. You may have easily just slipped through the cracks. Now there's three. I'm not willing to risk it, not just for ease."
"First, you force me to let you tag along. Now, you force me to change my plan." He glowered. "What do you suppose then?"
"I'm glad you asked." I beamed. Finally my obsession with Prison Breakout films had come to use. "It's simple really. We need a distraction. Something so big that all it will hold all the Guards attention. Then while we are invisible. That's when we walk out the front doors."
"So what we need is a Prison riot." Crane stated, I could tell that under his cold, calculating eyes he was secretly impressed. "But do you have any idea how hard they are to begin? Most inmates are so doped up that they live in their heads more than here. They wouldn't even notice, let alone react to a riot."
"Which is why you have to start a small one, to unleash the bigger one." I explained with ease, the thought having already occurred to me.
Crane sat silent, listening to my solution.
"See the Monster crew over there, lost without their leader?" I pointed to them with my head, watching them all bicker. "They're vulnerable as well as violent. Anything would set them over the edge. You start something with them, and they'll kick off. The Guards here will be too distracted to notice me sneaking out."
Crane frowned, not liking the sound of trusting me with anything, "Why is it you that sneaks off?"
"Because you won't be able to do the next part." I retorted back. "Whilst they're trying to take control over the situation, I'll find that Croc guy, break him out. And we've got our diversion."
"You thought Killer Croc was a bullshit."
I shrugged loosely, "Yeah well, I changed my mind."
"And then what?" Jonathan asked, uninterested in how I came to the revelation, all he wanted to now was the plan.
"We regroup at Maximum Security which should be empty given there's an animal of the rampage. We break him out, and like you said- walk out of here."
Crane nodded sarcastically, "This is all supposing that the Croc doesn't kill you the moment you open his cell door, which I wonder how you will manage given you don't have any keys to open the lock."
He didn't trust that I could manage any of it, but most of all he didn't trust me. He thought as soon as the miniature riot was taking place in the cafeteria I would chance escaping through the entrance. And I probably would have considered doing just that if I had known the directions to the front door from the dining hall, which I obviously didn't. The only places I knew how to get to were from my cell to the cafeteria, and maximum security section from my cell. Other than that, I was clueless. I needed him currently just as much as he needed me.
"Listen Doc. All I need from you is to tell me where they keep him, and a paperclip. If we haven't regrouped within ten minutes you are free to assume I am dead, and can leave with your boyfriend without me."
Crane eyed me up suspiciously, ignoring my jeer, "You seem to be very willing to risk your life for someone who got you here in the first place."
I grimaced at the memory.
"Yeah well, as soon as I'm out of here, I'm going my separate way." I admitted, "I can't stand the clown. But he's my ticket to freedom. If I have to save him to save myself, then I'd do it a hundred times over. So I'll take my chances with the Croc. If I don't then I'm dead anyways, by either you or Boles."
Plus I was hopeful that the Croc wouldn't be willing to eat anything that hadn't been clean in a week. Tainted meat, and whatnot.
"If you even consider double crossing me, I'll kill you." He warned.
"Wouldn't dream of it." I tried to give him a small reassuring smile. "So, the Croc?"
He paused for a second, considering yet again whether or not to trust me before answering.
"Bottom level. You take a right if you leave through the backdoors, go down two flights of stairs, go along the corridor and turn right. Then keep going until you come to his cell door. It's easy to spot, it's the only one there."
Sounded easy enough.
"How about Guards?"
Crane let out a small smile, "Nearly non-existent. Only time he gets checked to see if he's still breathing is dinnertime when they throw him a chunk of meat. Nobody wants to go near him in case he catches a craving for their scent."
I swallowed, that didn't sound good.
"Only thing you got to watch out for is the security cameras," he cautioned. "Once they find out you're down there you'll have four minutes at the very most to break him out."
"Got it. So the paperclip?"
"Easy." He bragged. "I'll have it you by tomorrow."
I nodded.
"Remember," he reminded me, as if I may have forgotten. "Double cross me-"
"And you'll rip my lungs out from my mouth" I finished it for him, brushing off his threat. "Don't worry, I'll save you all the trouble. See you, same time tomorrow."
I was only hoping that Boles wouldn't have my dead by then.
Author's Note: The next chapter is a biggie, so I'll try to have it written as quickly as possible. Then after that, it is onto Part Three which will finally feature much more of the Joker, and Alice's complex relationship with him. I'm so pumped! Thank you again for all the support, I can't emphasise how much it means to me.