Disclaimer

I do not own Naruto. Naruto is the sole property of Masashi Kishimoto.

Episode 1: Pilot

The camera pans in on a disgruntled Naruto and sheepish-looking Sakura.

"Hello! Welcome to the Konoha show!" Sakura chirped, looking slightly over the camera. She bounced on the balls of her feet, her nervousness evident.

"Tsunade's making us do this because the missions are super slow right now," Naruto mumbled. His hands were buried in his jacket pockets as he focused his gaze on the camera.

"Now, you may be asking, where is Sasuke in all of this," Sakura began. "Well, he's... where is he?" Her widened eyes darted around the room, scanning the furniture and the entrances.

"I don't know! You said you knew!" Naruto accused. He turned from his position in the center to point at Sakura's nose.

The screaming ensued, and with each response, they grew closer and closer.

"Well, I obviously don't!"

"You should!"

"Why can't you ever figure things out?!"

"Because that's your job!"

"My job is to babysit you!"

"I don't need a babysitter."

"Then keep up with things!"

"Sasuke's your boyfriend; why should I watch after him?!"

Sakura blushed and turned away from Naruto. "He is so not my boyfriend!"

"Then why can you never stop talking about him?!"

"I do too!"

"Do not!"

"Do too!"

"Do not!"

"I do too. Your argument is irrelevant!"

"Well, your face is irrelevant!"

Sakura glared, turning back to Naruto. "Is that all you can come up with?"

"No! I can come up with plenty more!"

Their faces were inches apart.

The door opened to allow Sasuke Uchiha to enter. A fake crowd cheering system applauded. "Sorry, I'm late. I had things to take care of," Sasuke began before looking at Naruto and Sakura.

Who were now kissing.

In a panic at the door opening, they fell on top of each other, locking lips in the process.

Sasuke groaned. "Get a room!" He threw a stack of papers at the two entangled on the floor. "Seriously, this is television. Children are watching!"

Sakura pulled herself off of Naruto, who was still stunned. Blushing, she wiped at her mouth. "Oh gosh, Sasuke, thank goodness you came when you did! The freak kissed me!"

The camera panned to a smaller television in the corner, which slowly replayed the entire first scene.

Sakura blushed more. "No, no, Sasuke, it's lying! It was just a freak accident!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "Hn."

"Do you still love me, Sasuke?"

Sasuke squinted. "Love you? No."

Naruto bolted up. "See, Sasuke doesn't love you! You can stop acting like he's your boyfriend any time now!"

Sakura, fed up, walked straight to Naruto, and punched him.

Naruto went flying through the glass window.

Sakura, being too busy seething with rage, remained at the window, shouting insults at Naruto.

"Alright, guys, uh, thank you for tuning in, I guess. See you next time?" Sasuke mumbled, glancing back occasionally.