"This is the worst plan ever." Vanessa shook her head as Beth drove away on the back of Daryl Dixon's motorcycle.
Maddy nodded, sighing. Vanessa regarded her curiously. "How'd you know to call him?"
Maddy returned her gaze shrewdly. "She may not realise it, but I think he'd do anything for her."
Vanessa blinked, looking back out to the road where the lights from the motorcycle were no longer visible. Beth's relationship with Daryl Dixon had only come up in passing a few times with Maddy.
"C'mon." Maddy sighed. "I'll offer Maggie and Glenn a lift home. I'll say Beth is upstairs asleep."
Vanessa glanced back at her friend distractedly. "Yeah…just make sure she doesn't go upstairs." She paused. "What about Zach? His car's at your place ain't it?"
Maddy's lips compressed into a thin line. "What about him?"
Vanessa watched her walk away before following her shortly.
They always underestimated Maddy.
.
.
Daryl drove back to his house slowly. Probably the slowest he had ever driven. He didn't hear a sound from Beth.
When they reached the threshold of the forest, Daryl slowed to a halt. He considered momentarily whether they should walk through the forest, but he felt her hands squeeze at his waist.
He revved the engine, carefully manoeuvring through the trees until they reached the clearing in front of his cabin.
Once he had parked, he waited while she shakily used his shoulder as leverage, dismounting from the bike in the careful manner of someone who wasn't quite seeing straight. He took his helmet off, letting it fall by his side before quickly getting off the bike, watching her closely out of the corner of his eye as he jingled his keys.
She looked tired, and avoided looking at him. The moonlight barely penetrated the trees, but the faint light illuminated her skin. He rolled his shoulder, arching his back before he walked towards the cabin. The night around them was still and silent, a far cry from the party they'd left behind. He heard her footsteps closely behind him.
Daryl didn't know what happened at the party, but a part of him wished he had been there to rip apart whoever was responsible for this. The part that didn't wish it…it was the stronger part. The part that knew that nothing specific had happened, that this had been a long time coming. He wouldn't know for sure until she told him, and he wasn't going to ask her to.
He could be wrong. He'd never seen Beth act like a stupid teenager, not really. She'd come close to it that day by the lake, but even he knew himself that he was taking his anger about Merle out on her. After all, that had been the day Merle had been sentenced.
He clenched his teeth. Merle. He had yet to arrange a visit to the prison. He knew he should, and soon, but it had been so long now since he had seen or talked to his brother it was hard to pick up the phone. He needed to talk to him, but was almost afraid of what he would hear. He would do it soon, he told himself. Soon.
Focusing his attention back on Beth, he unlocked the door and pushed it open, standing back to allow her to walk in first. She walked past him sullenly, and he started to think maybe this was Beth acting like a stupid teenager. He tried to remind himself that she was probably feeling sick and more than a little affected by the alcohol but it was hard not to react to her sullen stance, especially after picking her up from the party in the middle of the night.
The silence that greeted them once the door slammed shut behind him was deafening. She stood by the dining table, her head lowered.
"Sit down."
She lingered for a moment before pulling out a chair abruptly, sitting down hard.
"Getcha some water," he muttered, walking over to the kitchen. He washed out a glass before he filled it with water.
She remained silent as he placed the glass in front of her.
"Can't I have a beer?" She asked pointedly, looking over at the fridge. Daryl nearly snorted at the first words she chose to say to him.
"Fresh out," he grunted, sitting down opposite her. He wasn't lying either, he hadn't had any beer in his fridge for about a week. He would usually crack one open after work but had been doing it less and less since Merle was gone.
"Isn't that all you drink?" She asked, looking sceptically around the room. He stilled, narrowing his eyes.
"That what you think?" He asked. "Just sit around, drinking all night?" His tone was deceptively offhand, a hostile vein running through it. She must have noticed because she suddenly looked uncomfortable, shifting in her seat.
"No, well, I mean you like it right? And most guys drink it," she amended, looking at him apprehensively.
"Jimmy drink beer?" He asked, and he immediately knew how that sounded. But he knew what her father's take on alcohol was, and he was pretty sure her brother Shawn knew his way around a liquor store (even though he probably wasn't twenty-one yet), so for males in her life that he knew of it basically left Jimmy.
She glared at him. "No, and so what?" She snapped, and winced almost immediately, her hand going to her temple.
"Nothin', I just ain't some pansy ass boy," he replied angrily, feeling his temper build. Beth rolled her eyes, still rubbing her temple.
"Oh, so drinkin' beer makes you a man does it?" She asked drily, squeezing her eyes shut for a second.
He blew out a breath through his nose, his fingers itching by his side. That wasn't what he meant, and he already regretted saying it but he was too worked up now. Images of his father passed out on the couch, of Merle laughing in his face swam before his eyes.
"You think drinkin' beer makes you a woman?" He countered, wondering why in the hell he picked her up tonight. It sure as shit wasn't to have this conversation.
Beth dropped her hand away from her face, glaring at him but even he could see the hurt mixed through it. He felt a flash of fear that she could see the same.
"You think I wanted to drink 'cos I wanted to feel grown up?" She asked, disbelief evident in her voice. "I wanted to forget," she enunciated the word 'forget' deliberately, even as her cheeks turned pink.
He felt some of the tension drain from him, only to be replaced instead by the feeling like he was suffocating. "Forget?"
She blinked, her eyes flickering to the ceiling before she exhaled heavily. "This year has just been…really hard. My…mama, and…my brother movin' away, and tonight was just…" she trailed off. "It just feels…it felt like I was all alone."
Daryl stared at her for a moment that seemed to stretch on forever. "Life's hard, ain't it?" He asked, and the hostility in his tone seemed to startle her out of her reverie.
"How can you say that to me?" She asked incredulously. "You know what it's like, losing your mother!"
The chair scraped against the floor as he stood abruptly. "Least you had a fuckin' mother!" He seethed. Beth very nearly recoiled, staring at him in shocked confusion. He only then realised exactly what he'd said.
"Daryl –"
He glared at her, effectively silencing whatever she had been about to say. "My mother was long gone 'fore she even died."
He didn't want to talk about his mother's death, and he wanted to talk about his childhood even less. Beth comparing their loss…it was inconceivable to him at that moment. He had no one.
"I am nothin' like you! You still have your family," Daryl snapped as he pointed his finger, indicating the place they'd just left behind. The place where her family and friends were, and the place she had just run from.
Beth blinked, staring ahead of her. The silence stretched between them, his words echoing throughout the room and he was horrified with himself.
She looked up at him, wide eyed. "I…" she stopped, seemingly at a loss for words. She stared in front of her before looking up at him again, her eyes pleading. "I'm sorry, I'm not like you, I'm not strong like you," her voice wavered and suddenly panic and pure shame was running through him.
"She's just gone." Beth whispered the words, seeming to withdraw even further into herself.
Daryl ran a hand through his hair as he stared at her, concern building quickly within him. He had fucked this situation up royally, and he took a small step towards her, watching her carefully. He had berated her for comparing their loss, their lives, when in fact it was hypocritical of him to do so. He had essentially told her to be grateful for what she had left, but it wasn't at all fair. She had lived a life full of…love, and warmth. To have an integral part of that torn from her…
He studied her closely, taking another small step towards her. Her posture was slumped and her gaze forlorn.
"Beth…"
Her eyes flashed, pinning him with their sudden anger. "What?"
He winced slightly.
She shook her head, rubbing her temple looking confused and angry, whether it was directed at him or not he wasn't sure.
"Everyone leaves…" she murmured. "And I just want it to stop."
Daryl crouched down slightly in order to meet her eyes. "I ain't leaving."
Beth looked at him soberly. "You have before."
She stated the words simply. There was no malice, only the barest trace of bitterness.
Daryl wavered, uncertain of how to respond to that. "I got you, didn't I?"
Her friend may have practically begged him to pick her up, but he did, and he figured that had to count for something. Her words struck a little too close to home for his comfort though. He had a tendency to leave, to run when someone got too close. It also struck him that his avoidance of her after the near-dinner at her house must have hurt her more than he thought.
"It won't last." A tear fell down her cheek and his hand twitched.
"I ain't leaving." Daryl repeated himself urgently, taking another step forward and crouching down fully before her.
Beth took a shuddering breath, blinking before wiping her eyes. She smiled weakly, her eyes red and puffy. Her make up was smeared and the shirt she was wearing was far too large, drowning her petite frame. She was beautiful.
"Promise?"
Daryl furrowed his brow. Could he promise such a thing? Was there any acceptable answer other than yes?
He nodded slowly. "Yeah," he rasped. "Promise."
He froze in place as she slid off the chair, feeling his arms rise up to catch her. The chair slid back against the floor behind her as she sunk into his body awkwardly, until he shifted, his knees hitting the floor and her body moulded against his.
His arms, loose around her, tightened their hold and she curled into him, her arms snaking around his body.
Lord, but he was lost.
.
Daryl held her until her breathing was deep and even.
He carried her into his bedroom, setting her down on his bed carefully. He lifted her legs up as he pulled the blanket out from underneath her before covering her with it, and she snuggled into the fabric with a sigh as it was draped over her body.
She was damn well gonna kill him.
He set a bucket down by the bed, expecting that the contents in her stomach would make its way up sooner rather than later.
He pulled the door ajar quietly before sitting down heavily on his couch, leaning forward and scrubbing his face with his hand.
Completely and utterly lost.
.
The retching started nearly an hour later. Daryl sat dozing in front of the television as it played silently, the bluish light flickering in the otherwise dark room.
He shifted on the couch, inhaling deeply as he slowly stirred from his semi conscious state. He rolled his shoulder as he listened to her puking her guts out. He couldn't stop a wry look from drifting across his face as he shook his head, rubbing the back of his neck. If anyone had ever told him that Beth Greene would be in his bed throwing up one day, he probably would have ignored them from the sheer stupidity of the very thought.
There was a pause in the retching and Daryl pushed himself off the couch. He walked over to the dining table, retrieving her glass of water from earlier. He made his way silently to the bedroom door, knocking firmly before slowly pushing the door open, looking into the dark room.
Beth was sitting up hunched over the bucket in her lap, and he pushed the door ajar behind him allowing a remaining sliver of light shine through across her face. The curtains were open, allowing a thin film of moonlight to shine into the room, only just reaching the edge of the bed.
She put the bucket down on the floor beside the bed and looked up at him tentatively.
"Brought you some water." He suddenly felt a little nervous, and held the glass out to her as he reached the foot of the bed.
Her fingers touched his as she accepted the glass and his eyes darted to hers before he looked away just as fast.
"Thanks." Her voice was a little dry. She took a sip, leaning back against the bed frame. "I'm so embarrassed."
Daryl shifted on his feet. She put the glass down on the bedside table.
"I feel so stupid, I don't even know what happened. I just…"
Daryl sat down on the edge of the bed, twisting to look at her as she moved her feet to make room for him.
"You just panicked." He finished for her.
Beth nodded.
They sat in silence for a moment.
"You didn't have to come get me." She said quietly, leaning forward and shifting down the bed towards him, the sheets rumpling around her. "They shouldn't have called you."
Daryl looked up at her sharply.
"But I'm glad they did." She reached out a hand and covered his own that was splayed on the bed supporting him. Her skin was smooth, unblemished ivory against his worn, roughened skin.
His face was warming slightly, and she looked so damn beautiful sitting there in his bed in her oversized shirt. His hand tensed under hers until she curled her fingers around his, and he relented, his fingers encircling her petite hand.
.
.
Daryl sat in the dark while Beth went to the bathroom. By some miracle he actually had a spare toothbrush somewhere, the package of which was probably covered in dust, but he had told her to use it if she wanted to.
Neither of them had mentioned their spat earlier. He knew that she hadn't just meant the party when she had said she was embarrassed. It wasn't exactly an apology, but he didn't need one. He had said some stupid shit too. He did need to remind himself to breathe when she held his hand.
He heard the bathroom door open and listened closely as she walked through the cabin, her steps quiet and deliberate. Hesitant.
When she finally appeared in the doorway, she looked tired but less pale. Her fingertips brushed at her temple briefly, the gesture catching his eye.
"I can sleep on the couch," she offered as she hovered in the doorway. "You can have your bed back."
He stood up as she entered the room. "Take the bed. I'll sleep on the couch."
She shook her head. "It's ok, I don't mind."
He pretended he didn't hear her protest. "What time does yer Daddy get up? Gotta get you home before then don't I?"
Beth shrugged. "Pretty early, but he'll be out workin' in the fields." She paused. "I don't gotta tell him 'bout this do I?"
He snorted. "Hell no."
Beth looked at him in amusement and he felt a smirk tug at his lips.
"What happened to being honest?" She asked lightly, taking a step closer to him, tilting her head back.
Daryl shrugged. "Fuck that, he'd shoot both of us."
Beth shook her head, smiling wryly. "You didn't do anything. It's all right."
The smile on her lips died as they looked at each other.
"Thank you for…before. I was wrong to throw you leavin' back in your face."
Daryl squinted at her uncertainly.
Beth smiled again, ruefully. "You came back…always do." She huffed out a short laugh, shrugging.
Daryl shook his head. "You don' need me." His bedroom had never felt so small.
Beth looked at him timidly, before she took a step closer to him, almost right under his nose, and he stared down at her as she raised her lips to his cheek, pressing a soft kiss to his skin.
He swallowed hard, warm flashbacks to outside her house rushing in his mind. Her lips felt so warm and soft, and he couldn't look away as she stared up at him.
He tilted his face, his lips hovering over hers for a moment as his eyes flickered down to her lips and back up to meet her gaze. She was looking at him so openly and surely, and his heart was fucking pounding.
.
Beth stared at Daryl as he held himself rigid, his entire body tense as he stared down at her seemingly frozen. On the inside, Beth's heart was racing. She smiled softly in an effort to reassure him, before leaning in somewhat, pausing for the briefest of seconds until she finally closed the distance between them. His lips met hers softly as she kissed him, placing her hands against his chest feeling the solidness, his solidness, beneath her hands. Beth tilted her head and he seemed to breathe her in, their lips fusing together as her hands gripped his shirt, clutching the material tightly.
Her heart soared as his hands gripped her waist, pulling her against him. Beth tilted her head, parting her lips and he took the invitation, his tongue slipping inside, stroking languidly against her own. He tasted vaguely sweet, almost tangy. Beth moaned low in her throat, and suddenly his hands were on her shoulders pushing her away, his lips torn from hers.
Beth stumbled back a step, blinking in confusion. He stood before her breathing heavily, as was she, and he couldn't meet her eyes.
"Sorry," he breathed hoarsely. "I shouldn't have…fuck." He shook his head.
Beth felt the hurt build up inside of her, but she pushed it down, shaking her head. "It's ok."
He eyed her hesitantly, his hand coming up to brush his mouth. Beth turned away from him, sucking her lips in as she tried not to cry. Again.
The silence settled in the room, only seeming to amplify the rapidly uncomfortable tension that was developing between them.
The seconds stretched into what seemed like hours as Beth waited for him to say something. When he did, all she felt was crushing disappointment.
"Take the bed. I'll sleep on the couch."
Beth glanced at him over her shoulder, before looking back in front of her. She nodded, more to herself than in answer to his statement. After a moment, she heard him walk away, and the door shut softly.
A/N: I'm really curious to hear your thoughts on this chapter! Seriously thanks to everyone for the follows, favourites, reviews and for reading, it's kind of amazing to me that there are so many people reading this, and 19 chapters in!
To Opal (guest reviewer) - Very true and well said, re Beth wanting to ask Daryl to the party :)
I'm going away again in a few days, for 3 weeks. I won't have my laptop and internet will be sketchy, just in case you leave a question or something and I don't reply for ages.