XXx Aya xXX

I watch the pale fine sand blow over my feet as the host club gets to work. Tamaki really had me going there. For a minute there I actually thought this was going to be a hosts only thing like the waterpark was.

But no…there are nothing but skimpy, bikini clad high school girls for as far as the eye can see.

I fiddle nervously with one of the ties of my own bikini as the sand stings my bare legs.

Hikaru and Kaoru have stuffed me into one of their mother's newest designs. A dark sea-foam green number with tea rose pink ruffles. It's not bad, but this time I wasn't able to snag a pair of shorts.

More than anything, I just want to cover up. I hate wearing a swim suit without shorts.

Thankfully the length of my hair covers most of my body, and my breasts are really nothing much to look at. Normally that would make me feel secure, but now that I'm surrounded by a bunch of other girls in skimpy swimsuits, I can feel my self-esteem plummet below sea level.

Especially because Kisa flaunting her curves and all of her busty glory barely contained in a baby pink bikini and plastering herself to Honey. Watching even from a distance makes me nauseous, but I don't feel like ruining this beautiful beach by making my breakfast reappear.

"Hey Aya-senpai, come play with us!"

I turn to see the group of girls the twins usually host standing by a huge volley ball net.

I swallow hard. Sports plus me in a bikini equals a possible embarrassing moment I'll never live down as long as I live. But then again, that applies when I'm not wearing one too. And I'd rather avoid any situations that could end like that.

"Um…I think I'll pass," I mutter as I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear.

Their smiles slip before they exchange an odd look before turning back to the twins, their eyes flashing ever so slightly. Their grip on the beach balls tighten for a second before they put on a smile for Hikaru and Kaoru.

My stomach sinks as I make my way over to the large black beach umbrella I set up earlier. I find myself sighing for the millionth time this morning as I sink down onto my fluffy blue towel.

I hug my knees for a second before grabbing for my pair of borrowed sunglasses from where they rest by my pair of black sandals and slip them down onto my face. I pull over my black and grey hoodie over towards me and ball it up before stuffing it under my head.

I curl up on my side, closing my eyes behind the purple tinted shades and listening as the rest of the hosts work their charms. My breathing slows, and I drift onto that fine line between sleep and consciousness. I feel the sun beating down on my face, and the cool mist of the breaking waves.

Everything is so peaceful, save for the occasional squeal from the customers. I'm glad no one's thought of telling the school that I'm technically a hostess. I don't how I'd handle hosting boys.

Soon enough my train of thought slips.

I'm floating in bliss, thinking about mindless things. This is the most relaxed I've been since the trip to the water park a week ago. I've been spending so much time around the host club that I find myself forgetting what me time feels like. Which really isn't such a bad thing now that I think about it.

Earlier this morning all I really wished was that I could have brought my headphones with me. But Kyoya made me leave them back at his estate. But now I'm kinda glad, it's kind of like listening to one of those therapeutic 'sounds of nature' tapes you play when you have trouble getting to sleep.

Everything is peaceful and serene, and the sun is warming me nicely. I could stay this way forever.

That is until I hear them...

"Do you think she's really sleeping?" I hear a girl whisper.

"Why don't you poke her with a stick and find out?" another answers.

I feel my eyebrow twitch. Yeah, poke me with a stick, see what happens. I dare you.

"I think she is," the first girl mutters.

It takes me a second to place them as Sumi and Meirika. I resist the urge to groan as I hear them step closer to me. Part of me wishes they'd come close enough for me to stick a leg out and have them land face first in the gritty sand, but to my utter disappointment, their voices are coming from behind me.

"She hasn't moved at all," another voice says coolly. "She'd have moved by now if she could hear us. We all know how good she is at feigning innocence."

My hand that lays on the towel next to me twitches against my will. Of course the universe would throw Kisa into this moment just because…reasons.

Why couldn't she just do me a favor and stay on the other side of the beach?

"Has she said anything to you since that day at the club Kisa-chan?" Sumi asks as I hear her take a step closer.

"Yes and no…" I hear Kisa reply, her icy tone becoming masked by her normal 'cute little girl that can do no wrong' act.

"Well which is it?" Meirika pushes. "Did she or didn't she?"

"W-well," Kisa stammers. "There was this thing a few weeks ago. I was walking out of the library and saw the hosts coming out of the elementary school buildings. She was with them, and her and Honey-senpai were dressed up like elementary students."

"And…?" Meirika urges.

"They were holding hands…" Kisa whimpers. "And she saw me and Honey tried to let go of her hand bust she wouldn't let him. She even laced their fingers together and then just smirked at me."

"What a two-faced bitch!" Meirika snarls.

"Meirika-chan!" Sumi gasps and somewhat scolds.

"Don't act like it's not true!" Meirika snaps. "You've seen how she is at the club! She thinks that she's too good to associate with any of us. If you try and be friendly she just glares and backs away like you've got some contagious disease, but when she's around the hosts it's like she's a little angel that can do no wrong! I'm getting real sick of taking a backseat to this stupid Goth Doll."

Whoever said jealousy looked hot on a girl was the biggest idiot to ever live.

"Calm down Meirika-chan," Kisa says, just barely disguising the command with a sweet tone. "Jealousy isn't befitting a pretty girl like you. You'll get anger lines."

"T-thanks Kisa-chan," Meirika stammers. "But I'm not pretty…not like you. It's really no wonder why senpai likes you so much."

"Thanks," Kisa replies, and I can picture her smugness from where I lie. "But even I'm being shoved to the side by her."

"Well this trip is your time to shove back Kisa-chan," Sumi replies. "She's down for the count right now, so go make a move to make sure he hasn't forgotten."

"Yeah, I mean come on," Meirika pipes up again. "If anyone knows what a freak she is, it will be him."

I grit my teeth, biting back the anger boiling in the pit of my stomach. Obviously they have nothing better to do with their lives.

"She seems to have everyone else fooled though," Sumi spits. "Did you hear she rejected some guy who tried to ask her out about a week ago? She was brutal! And in front of his friends too!"

"I heard about that!" Kisa replies. "She even pulled the whole 'it's not you, it's me' thing on him."

Yeah, you'd know all about that wouldn't you Kisa. I debate speaking up and scaring the crap out of them, but that takes energy I don't have right now. My body is still in that relaxed state and doesn't want to move.

"She acts like that, and yet she has every one of the hosts wrapped around her finger!" Meirika rants. "Especially poor Honey-senpai! He follows her around like a puppy! It's sickening."

I almost choke on my own throat. Say what? What the hell are they talking about?!

"Don't say that," Kisa says sharply.

"S-sorry," Meirika stammers. "But you do know that's what it looks like to us."

"How do you think she gets away with it?" Sumi asks quietly.

"I don't know," Kisa spits, obviously still angry with Meirika's last statement. "But she's gotten more attention from Honey in a day then we got all semester!"

"Do you see the way they fuss over her all the time?" Sumi continues. "It's like she's some little doll they enjoy dressing up."

Well I hate to tell them this, but that's kinda true. Hikaru and Kaoru have way to much fun dressing me up. But it's not like I enjoy it. I mean sure…sometimes it's fun, but on days like this where it's bikini stuff...I'd rather not.

"C'mon," Kisa mutters. "We may as well get some time with them while we can. I'm not wasting any more time on her."

I simmer with anger as they trudge away through the sand, occasionally grumbling about how they should lose some weight since their feet were sinking so deep into the tiny dunes.

I grumble as I roll onto my back. Well, I guess it was stupid to think that you can avoid gossip just because you move. It follows you everywhere.

And now I just want to leave. So I give it ten minutes before I pretend to wake up.

I make a big show of stretching out my arms and back before I pull my black mini sun dress on. It's not shorts, but I do feel a lot better. While I straighten it out along my body I take a quick glance around.

Everyone seems occupied. The twins are playing volley ball, Kyoya is managing the waiting list for 'alone time with Tamaki,' Haruhi is hunting for shellfish with Honey, and Mori is watching over them. This may be my one chance to sneak away.

I'm suddenly very happy Kyoya's beach house is close by, and that he forced me to leave all my stuff there.

I inch away slowly, glad for the first time that some of these girls hate me and won't care to point out I'm trying to sneak away. But just as I'm leaving, Kisa spots me from halfway down the beach. Even from this distance I can see a huge smirk distort her pretty face, and she makes a quick shooing motion with her hands.

I roll my eyes and quickly step off the sand and past the wall that separates the beach from the residential area.

I stick to the shade, since the ground is hot and I can feel it through my thin sandals and it scorches the tops of my feet. My stomach gives out a growl as I walk through the labyrinth of streets, rudely reminding me that it's lunch time.

This stinks, but it doesn't take me long to find my way back to Kyoya's villa. I just have to look for the largest building in the area with the best view of the ocean. So I find it within ten minutes. The shade of the looming building is nice, and a lone maid opens the door for me before leaving for her break.

Despite my protesting stomach, I refuse her offer to make me lunch and just head to the kitchen myself.

After rummaging through the take cupboards for a few minutes I find a small bag of pasta that cooks in eight minutes. I bring out a pot and begin boiling the water as I search through the enormous fridge for butter and some parmesan cheese. When it's done I grab a bottle of water before trudging to my assigned room.

I change into a pair of white shorts and a red tank top before collapsing into my plush covers with my bowl in my lap. The warm cheese tastes more wonderful than usual as it wets my appetite.

"What to do, what to do?" I mutter to myself as I skewer another forkful of noodles.

I should be used to this kind of treatment. But it seems to hurt twice as much since I've gone a few months without hearing any spiteful gossip. But what bothers me more is what they said about Honey. He does follow me around, but it's because he knows I'm not much of a people person and he's trying to be the best friend he possibly can.

Is it so hard for them to believe he just does it to be nice? It's not like I asked him too. But, it's also not like I don't like it. I feel my face heat up. I've only just barely come to terms with the thought that I might like him as more than a friend…

And I still haven't gotten over what happened at the water park.

Waking up from that dream cradled in his arms was more of a pleasant surprise than it should have been. But what puzzled me is what my mind conjured up in the confession part of my dream.

I can barely admit to myself that I may like him, so it amazes me that I was able to say l-lov-... the L word.

But I had felt so safe. And every time I try to have this debate in my head my brain always turns to jelly. Many would think that was all the answer I need, but it's always that one thing that stops me.

Him.

That foul, loathsome maggot. It's because his accusation keeps screwing with my mind that I can't come to terms with anything. I don't love him, yet people believe that dreams are simply an embodiment of our most desperate desires.

Yet I know that I'd never want him to haunt my ass. So is it…that what I really want is to reject him? I let out a frustrated growl, flipping onto my stomach. The anger I felt from earlier is rekindled as I roll off the bed.

There's one way I can let all this out.

I reach into my bag, bringing out my dart board and my stash of old pictures that still need to be punctured beyond recognition. I slip back into my sandals and grab my phone, sticking it on my pocket and sling the string of the board over my shoulder while I tuck my headphones around my neck.

I glace out the window, seeing the vague outlines of the host club on the beach.

Just off to the right there's a large cluster of rocks. I squint, spotting a flat open space in the middle of the formation. That'll be prefect. It isn't visible from the beach, so I shouldn't have any problems with people interrupting.

XXx Honey xXX

"Ta da!" I yell as I walk out of the kitchen. "Here you go! Don't they look yummy?"

My arms are weighed down by plates of crabs, and Takashi is behind me, carrying even more plates. Haruhi really knows how to pick her seafood. The plates are loaded with crabs, oysters, scallops, and anything else that you would see at a high class seafood buffet.

Kyo-chan turns around as Takashi helps me place the food on the table.

"I apologize there aren't any maids around to help you cook senpai," he says as he makes his way over to his place at the table.

"It's no big deal," I say with a smile. "We appreciate you letting us stay here."

I do a quick headcount before turning towards Takashi. He catches my gaze and nods before I can even ask him to go get Haruhi and Aya.

I sigh to myself as I watch his retreating figure.

Sometimes I wonder what's going to happen to him when my aunt and uncle decide he needs to start dating. I mean, I love Takashi, but he's too quiet for his own good. Sure the girls at the club find it cute that he's the 'strong silent type.'

But what'll happen when he finally gets married? How will his wife deal with his silence? I can't be there to be his voice forever.

I look out the window at the stormy grey sky. Surely he's realized that by now. Right?

"It's awfully gloomy out there," I say to no one in particular. "It looks like it it's gonna rain."

"It's not just gloomy outside," Hika-chan mutters.

"It's pretty gloomy right here in the dining room," Kao-chan finishes. "Just take a look senpai."

I shift my gaze over and just beyond the table I can see Tama-chan curled up in a ball. His anger seems to have depleted from earlier, but now he seems to realize what he said to Haruhi. I can't tell what hurts his pride more…The fact that he actually said he wouldn't speak to her until she apologized, or the fact that she basically told him not to hold his breath for one.

"Come on, quit moping Boss," Hika-chan commands.

"You shouldn't have picked a fight with her in the first place," Kao-chan sighs.

Just then the door swings open, and Takashi's standing there with Haruhi...who's wearing a frilly pink dress…Well things just got a lot more interesting.

"Haruhi where'd you get that dress?" Hika-chan and Kao-chan ask in unison.

"From my dad," she says nonchalantly. "He must have repacked my bags when I wasn't looking. He's always trying to get me to wear this frilly stuff."

"That's awesome!" Hika-chan and Kao-chan yell. "Way to go dad!"

I smile at their antics. This is only the third time we've seen Haruhi in a dress, and I will admit that it suits her. But I can't help but wonder what Aya-chan would look like in a dress like that. Sure she'll wear a dress once in a while, but nothing frilly like this one.

For once I wonder if she'd ever wear something like that.

Then I notice.

"Hey Takashi?" I ask. "Where's Aya-chan?"

"She wasn't in her room," he replies with a shrug.

"I'll be right back," I sigh before walking out of the room. "Go ahead and start eating."

He nods as I walk down the hall to Aya's room.

I haven't seen her since she left the beach earlier, but conveniently; Kisa kept me from catching up to her. I couldn't think of a polite way to tell her to go away, so I was left to watch her leave quietly.

I finally reach her room and knock loudly, but her door swings open as my knuckles graze the wood.

The light isn't on, but it doesn't look like she was here all afternoon.

I sigh as I walk over to her bed. The blankets are wrinkled, so she must have taken a nap or something. I look out the window, staring at the storm clouds as they grow closer. I hope she gets back before it hits.

Then I see it. Its unmistakable.

Aya-chan's bright hair is visible among the rock formations down by the beach. I smile in relief and head for the door.

If she's got her headphones on like I think she does, she probably hasn't even noticed the storm clouds yet.

XXx Aya xXX

I throw the darts in time with the rapid beat of the music, ignoring the chilly air that blows against my face. I've been at this for hours, but I've barely made it halfway through my stack of photos. The fact that there are so many makes me angrier. I wasted so much time with him, so much time I could have been doing something useful with my life.

Eventually everything just goes numb and I collapse in a heap on the floor. My body is still shaking form earlier, and no coherent thoughts are running through my head, and it spins as the sun beats down on my back.

My shoulders shake as I rest my face in my hands. This is unbearable. How can one person break me down and reduce me to this? How could I allow this to happen? And why am I still carrying on?

XXx Honey xXX

She goes ridged as I remove her headphones and slide them down to rest on her neck.

She looks quickly, her expression furious. I flinch back internally, but force myself to keep my expression composed. On the bright side, once she sees it's me standing behind her the anger seems to drain out of her.

"Oh, sorry," she mutters. "I didn't know that was you."

She tries to turn back around, looking slightly ashamed of herself for being caught. Again. Her face is red, but it's more muted than usual, as if she doesn't have the energy to be fully embarrassed.

"Are you ok?" I ask.

"Fine," she mutters, but even she doesn't seem convinced by her answer.

I walk past her and over to her dartboard. There's another picture taped to the center of it. It looks like a self-shot picture of Aya-chan and that boy from the last time. Half of her face his punctured away, but I can see from the part that's still intact she's smiling.

The boy's arm is around her shoulders, holding her close. I feel a pang of jealousy. She looks so happy. She's blushing and smiling, like she's really enjoying herself. Like there's no other place in the world she'd rather be.

I swallow the bitterness in my throat and step away. It's going to hurt, but I decide to ask anyways. How else am I going to be able to help?

"Hey Aya-chan?" I ask, turning back to her.

"Yes?" she responds, not looking up from stuffing the darts back in their case.

"Am I ever going to find out who this guy is?" I ask, fighting to keep my voice neutral.

Her eyes widen as she looks up to see me pointing at the picture. Then they narrow as she walks towards me, and for a minute I think I made her really mad, but she just walks straight past me, and rips the picture quickly from the board.

"I really don't know what to call him now," she says bitterly. "But if you want to keep things simple, I guess you can call him my ex-boyfriend."

I figured as much, but it still hurts to hear her say it. Knowing that she went from being that happy in this guy's arms to taking darts to his face is a little scary.

"What happened make you hate him so much?"

She cringes.

"He dated me as a joke," she finally spits out after a short silence.

The words come out like venom. Only instead of affecting me, they seem to only dissolve her emotional barriers. Sympathy and anger wash over me as I watch her face fill with bitterness and self-loathing. She looks like she's biting on the inside of her cheeks to keep from crying.

"What?" I finally mange to ask as the initial shock wears off.

"His friend bet him that he couldn't stand to date me for a month," her voice is thick, like she has trouble forming the words. "He did, and he got an hundred euros for it."

With all the raw emotion that's rolling off her, I want to offer her a hug, but with the way she is now I don't know how she'll react.

"I hate him," she finally whispers, crumpling the picture in a tight ball.

I look up. She looks so hallow and broken, confusion and regret swirling violently in her eyes. They battle fiercely, pushing tears over her long lashes that cut harsh trails down her cheeks. Her shoulders quake harshly, and before I can even think about it my arms are around her and her head is under my chin, one hand stroking her hair and the other rubbing soothing circles between her shoulder blades.

"I'm sorry," I murmur, apologizing for the forwardness and for making her talk.

She goes ridged in my arms, tilting her head up slowly to meet my gaze. I in turn just offer her a soft smile, and wait to see how she'll choose to respond.

My heart pounds as her hand loosens around the crumpled picture. It falls to the ground as she leans forward, falling into my embrace. I try and ignore the pounding in my chest as she clings to me her cries are muffled.

"It's ok Aya-chan," I murmur as I stroke her hair. "He's halfway around the world. You never have to deal with that guy again."

She clings to me tighter, and I return the action, happy to have an excuse to have her in my arms again. But I've got to admit I could have asked for better circumstances.

"But you know what?" I continue as I stroke her hair. "It's not good for you to carry on like this. I know you can't just pretend that never happened, but it won't do you any good to linger on it."

She's silent for a minute before she pulls back, her eyes bloodshot but no longer tearing up. Glancing over at the picture on her dartboard she lets out a heavy sigh.

"I know you're right," she whispers. "I've tried so hard already. But maybe that really wasn't hard enough. I mean, I do still have these."

She lets go of me and walks over to her bag and pulls a large yellow envelope from the inside. Grimacing as she opens the flap, she gets back to her feet before detaching the picture on the dartboard.

"Can you hand me a few rocks?" she asks.

I stare at her in confusion but do it anyways, scooping up some large rocks from the floor. I hand them to her and she puts them in the envelope, sealing it shut permanently. Her eyes are still dead and hallow as she completes the task but begin to brighten as she tucks it under her arm and begins climbing the side of the rock formation.

Confused and more than a little bit worried, I follow her up and reach the top just in time to see her drop the envelope into the crashing waves below us.

"I'm sorry," she says turning back to me. "I wasn't supposed to get that worked up over this. After the last time you caught me, I promised myself it would be the last time I cried over him. You must think I'm pretty pathetic. Or a clingy drape…or both."

"Not really," I say as I step up beside her. "Crying doesn't make you weak. Your human and have feelings, so just get it out. You'll feel a lot better too, and then you can give your heart a break."

She smiles a bit, her cheeks flushing a bit.

"It's kind of amazing," she almost shyly. "I haven't known you for very long at all, yet you can make me see reason like you've known me your whole life. I wish you had been there when it actually happened, maybe I wouldn't be like this now."

I can feel my face heat up at her statement, but before I can respond, I hear a clap of thunder. She jumps slightly and we look up just as the rain begins to fall.

"Come on," she calls above the rain. "Let's go back."

She grabs onto my hand. It's reverted back into the non-romantic way, and while I'm still surprised she did it, I'm a bit disappointed it reverted to that. But I take advantage of the situation anyways and hold on to it tightly.

"You ready?" she asks.

"But what about your stuff?" I ask, looking back down to the little clearing.

"I don't think I'll need it anymore," she says with a smile. "I never really liked darts anyways."

And with that we jump back down to the beach, heading back to Kyo-chan's villa.

XXx Author's Notes xXX

Thirteen going on thirty…a little too literal for my liking

Lotsa love, Krystal