Chapter Three

Four months, two weeks ago

She opened the door to her room at Kelly's and tried to fight the smile that tugged at her lips. She had thought this moment, wondered if he'd actually come to her. She leaned against the door, her hand on her hip, and looked him square in the eye. "I never imagined I'd see you here."

His mouth went dry immediately and he started to wonder if it was a mistake to come here. He wasn't even sure why he was here. He looked her over, noticing the way her jeans hugged her hips, and tried to keep his eyes from lingering on the low cut of her top. He held up a paper bag. "I brought cake."

"You don't call, you don't write, you don't send flowers," she murmured, a devious smile on her lips as she stepped away from the door. She looked over her shoulder at him. "You really know how to make a woman feel good."

He smiled slowly, folding his arms across the chest as he walked into her room. He kicked the door shut with his foot, then leaned up against it, just like he had that night at Jake's. "I thought that would cheapen it."

She raised her eyebrows at him. "And being gone before I wake up doesn't?" He blushed and looked away. She laughed to herself and wondered if this was a feat of sometime. He never got embarrassed that she remembered.

He wouldn't tell her that the reason he slipped out before she woke up was because he couldn't bare to say goodbye. He knew the moment he woke up with her in his arms and she flashed an awkward, good morning smile to him he'd never be able to leave. He held the bag out. "A peace offering."

She stepped forward slowly, almost apprehensively. She wasn't sure what any of this meant. They had spent one…Two nights now together. And both nights had gone by with little discussion. Why was he here now? "I can never turn down cake," she said, taking the bag from him and walking over to the bed. She sat down slowly, then pulled the carton from the bag. She glanced back up at him. "How did you know where I was?"

He shrugged, sliding his hands in his pockets. "Word gets around in this town," he replied, biting his lip. He wouldn't tell her that he had asked around and had been given answers that he didn't like.

She popped the lid on the container and held a fork out to him. "You asked about me?" she asked with a smile. He looked handsome, sexy, ready to be taken with the way he was propped up against her door. She knew it was an image of him she'd remember for always. She was taken back when he didn't step forward, when he didn't seem to eager to sit down next to her. Was this just a pity stop? "What? You don't eat chocolate?" She slid her fork into the cake and took a bite.

He sucked in a breath, watching her mouth wrap around the bite. He noticed the tiny piece of chocolate that lingered at the corner of her mouth. It took all he had not to pounce on her like he had at Jake's, but this was different….Or was it? He wasn't even sure how he ended up here. In her room. He walked over and took the fork from her. When she took another bite, her lips sliding across her lips, he thought about turning around and walking away. He shouldn't be here now.

"You can sit," she said, nodding at the empty spot next to her on the bed. "I'd offer you a chair, but for some reason there's not one in here…Something about a fight, but it's just me." She paused and flashed him a grin. "I didn't imagine I'd have any guests."

He sat down beside her without saying anything. When she held the cake towards him, he scooped off a tiny bite, but didn't look at her. He felt out of place and lost. He should have never…."How are you?" he asked. He knew the answer already, but he was curious as to whether or not she'd give him the honest one.

She shrugged, taking another bite, then throwing her fork down in the container. "You asked about me," she replied curiously. "What are the people around town saying?" He shrugged, still not meeting her eye. This was awkward and she hated it. It wasn't supposed to be like this. Not with him. "I just mean-I'm sure you know."

He nodded as turned towards her, his knee grazing hers. It was an accident, but it sent a shiver through him. He was reminded of the touch of her skin, the taste of her lips against his, and the way she had called his name. Without thinking, words came from his lips. "I wanted to see you." She smiled and looked away, as if she were embarrassed. He scooted closer towards her and was relieved when she didn't back away. His eyes ran over her body and he wanted her more than he had ever wanted anyone. He didn't think of the reasons it was wrong, of why he should do her the favor and go, he just thought about his lips against hers.

It was as if her body had a mind of it's own. She felt his hand rub across her thigh and immediately she moved towards her. Her hands slipped beneath his jacket, running up and down his back, before she brought them around to push it off. She avoided his eyes, worried that if she saw how scared or how strong her desire was that he would back away.

He leaned in close, his hands tightening around her thighs. He noticed how she was avoiding his eyes and wondered if it was because like him, she knew it was wrong, but it just felt right. He brushed his cheek against hers, his eyes tracing over the smooth silkiness of her skin. His gaze lingered on that tiny speck of chocolate on the edge of her lip. "You uh, got some chocolate right here," he said, pressing his lips against the side of her mouth. His tongue snaked out, lapping gently at her skin.

She told herself this was wrong, that she had to stop this. She sighed, pulling away, her eyes snapping to his. She was prepared to tell him to go, to tell him she didn't want to see, but when he looked at her she knew it would never be possible. She was spent. In the worst possible away. She lifted a hand to his face, her thumb running over the bottom of his lip. "I think you missed it," she murmured, pulling his lips back against hers.

He tightened his grip on her thighs as she pulled his mouth against hers. He kissed her softly, his tongue prying her lips apart slowly and once he was in, he kissed her hard and passionately, a low moan escaping from his throat. His own desire and need surprised him. He moved his hands from her thighs to her waist, pushing her back against the bed. He shifted his weight on her, his body molding against hers in a perfect fit. When he felt her hands slide beneath his shirt, he pulled away breathless, nearly gasping for hair. He rested his head against the side of her face, his breath hot and heavy on her ear, before pulling back and slipping his t-shirt over his head.

She bit her lip in anticipation, taking in the sight of his muscular body. She reached out, her hands needing to touch his skin. It was smooth and defined beneath her palms and she wondered how she ever thought this is was wrong. When he pressed his face against her neck, wrapping a hand up in her hair, tugging slightly, she moaned loudly. And when he pulled harder, she whimpered. She wanted him then and there. She wasn't eager for a slow love making like before.

He tugged at the cut of her blouse, his tongue leaving a hot trail across her chest. He maneuvered it low enough to where her breasts were just in reach. He could see the faint bruises from the last time he had been with her and knowing that she had carried that night with her, made him want her more. His tongue licked across her chest, from one breast to the other, his hand still tugging on her shirt. When he heard it rip at the seam and saw how quick she was to help him tear it from her body, it took everything he had to not tug her pants off and take her right then.

"God," she murmured, when he finally jerked her shirt away, one last ripping sound tearing through the room. She wrapped her hands around his head, holding his mouth against the top of her breast, his tongue hot against her skin, as he maneuvered her body to undo her bra strap. She laughed softly when he yanked the bra from her body. Her laugh was replaced with a moan, when his mouth went straight for a nipple.

He sucked the tip hard, his tongue swirling around it in circles. He liked the feel of her hands tugging at her hair and the way her hips were thrusting towards her. She was desperate with a desire and need that only he could fulfill. He kept his mouth against her nipple, sucking hard, wanting to make sure she remembered this for days to come. He shifted to slide a hand between them and flicked the snap of her jeans and lower her zipper.

The instant he slid her zipper down, she pulled his hand away, wanting to get her pants off as soon as possible. She needed to feel his skin against hers. She rocked her hips up against his, his hard on pressing against her, and she cried out as she tugged the jeans down her sides. She thrust her hips against his again, something about the feel of him, knowing that he wanted her as badly as she did him, driving her wild.

He pulled away long enough to slip her pants off the rest of the way. He stood at the foot of the bed, his eyes looking her body up and down. She was naked, her hands gripping the sheets tightly, her hips rolling in desperation. He had never seen anyone so beautiful. He shoved his pants down, then lowered himself back over her slowly, taking her lips with his.

She broke the kiss almost immediately, a heavy sigh escaping her throat, when she felt his hot, toned body against hers. Her hands were in his hair, pulling his mouth against her skin. She cried out when his lips brushed over her breast, his teeth raking over it lightly, and his tongue licking slowly as if to soothe it. Her body arched up against his, anxious for his touch. When he made no move to touch her, she whimpered, pulling his head away from her body. "Please," she murmured, looking into his eyes.

He scowled when she said it. Knew he was a goner. It had brought him to his knees before and now, here he was, putty in her hands, willing to do whatever she wanted. He eased his body over hers, lowering his lips to hers. He pulled away, pressing a wet kiss on her cheek. "Please what?" he asked, his voice low and rough. She arched her hips against his and whimpered when he pulled away and looked at her, a devious grin on his face. "Just say it."

She whimpered again. She didn't know what to say. She wanted, no needed, it all. She needed his hands on her. She needed him inside of her. And she needed him all around her. She took a couple of deep breaths, trying to figure out what she wanted first. She knew he wasn't going to make a move until he told her to and it drove her mad. She reached out and traced a finger up and down his chest. She smiled when he pulled away from her touch, deciding she wasn't going to tell him what she wanted, she was going to take it.

He was taken back at first when she sat up and pushed him away, her eyes locked on his. She grabbed him, pulling him into a rough kiss, as she flipped him onto his back. She laughed when he cried out with surprise. She muffled it, kissing him hard, forcing her tongue into his mouth. She ground her hips down on his, forcing him to moan into her mouth. She was fired up with determination. She was going to make him want her as bad as she did him.

He gasped, his hands grabbing her by the hips, trying to keep her from grinding down on him again. He shook his head when she laughed at his frustration. He groaned when she bent over him, her lips brushing across his chest, her tongue lapping at his skin. He grabbed the back of her head, pulling her up into a long kiss. He knew she wanted the control and he would give it to her gladly, but she needed to know he could only take so much.

She kissed him back just as hard, her hand cradling the side of his face. She pressed her body against him as she slowly moved downward. She smiled as she placed short kisses down his chest. She laughed again when she heard him gasp as she slipped a hand between his legs. She shifted and wrapped her hand around him, then pumped up and down slowly.

He moaned, his hips arching up, and pulled himself to a sitting position. He groaned when she continued to touch him, his eyes locked on hers. It turned him on in a way he didn't think was possible and it was difficult for him to not lay back and let her do what she wanted. But he knew he'd never last. "You can't," he said, moving to pull her hand away from him.

"Hey," she said, raising up on her knees. She wrapped an a hand around the back of his head and pulled him into a kiss. She shifted to straddle him, keeping enough distance to slip her hand back around him. She broke the kiss and looked him in the eye. "Don't tell me I can't."

He would have laughed had she not meant it. "I would never," he replied softly, leaning in for another long kiss. He ran his hands up and down her back and she arched against his touched. He tried to ignore the fact that she was torturing him, focusing on her and her lips and the feel of her skin. But eventually, he pulled away and pressed his face against her shoulder. "You have to stop," he murmured, reaching between them and pulling her hand away.

She grinned deviously and leaned back, looking him in the eye. "Then tell me what you want me to do," she replied.

He had never seen her so confident, so sure, so commanding. He brushed her hair from her face and kissed her, flicking his tongue over her lip. "I want you." He groaned when she didn't move, but continued to look at him. "Please."

She leaned forward, brushing her chin against his. "That's all you had to say," she whispered, her breath hot on his ear. She shifted herself over him, placing a soft kiss against his ear, before she eased herself down on him.

His hips reared up immediately, his hands clutching her at the hip. He held on tightly as she stared to move. His swept his mouth over her shoulder, kissing her lightly, then biting down against her shoulder.

She cried out, pulling his head away from her shoulder immediately. She flashed him a smile, when he gave her a worried look, to let him know he hadn't hurt her. In fact, she kind of liked it, but she wasn't going to tell him that. She pushed him back down against the bed. Her hands planted firmly against his chest. She grinned down at him when she saw how he bit his lip in frustration and moved his hips to meet hers. She leaned forward, kissing him lightly. When she felt his hands tighten on her hips, she grinded harder, pulling away from the kiss and resting her head against his shoulder as a long moan escaped her lips. She tried to fight it, tried to wait for him. "I can't…" she murmured, against his shoulder.

He held a hand at her hip, guiding her movement, while he slipped another hand between her legs. He slid his thumb across her bud and she whimpered against him. "Let go," he muttered, pressing harder and almost immediately, he felt one of her hands scraping against his chest as she cried out, her entire body shaking above his. He pressed his face into her hair as he bucked her hips against hers, his hand still guiding her movements. He could hear her soft moans being muffled by her shoulders as she continued to grind against him. He felt the release build and when he came it was long and hard and he cried out even louder than she did.

She took a couple of minutes to catch her breath before she eased herself off of him. She ached for the touch of his skin on hers as soon as she pulled way. She laid on her back, her chest heaving, the room spinning. She felt completely out of control. And she was quiet afterwards, the realization of what they had just done sinking in. She knew it was wrong. She could list a thousand reasons, but all of them were countered by how right it felt. She closed her eyes, wishing she could will the outside world away. She wanted the moment in this room to last for always.

He watched as she rolled onto her side, the blanket slipping away from her chest. He wanted to tell her how beautiful she was, but knew he didn't have to. His eyes roamed over her breasts and he was relieved that she didn't cover herself up. He wanted her to feel free and uninhibited with him. It was part of his pull to her.

She lifted her eyes to his, her hand smoothing the blanket between them. "Why did you come here?" she asked finally. She almost regretted it as soon as she said it, but it was an answer she needed.

He kept his eyes locked on hers as he reached out and took her hand, linking his fingers in her. "I needed to get away for a little while….And I figured you did too."

"Are you okay?" she asked, wondering if he'd really tell her. She knew so little about his life, what was going on, especially right now. But she wanted to be a part of it all.

He wasn't sure at first how to answer. He didn't want this to come off as cheap or trite when it meant more than she could ever understand. "She wants to work things out," he said after a long pause. "I don't know how to separate the past from the present. It doesn't just go away."

She smiled sympathetically, understand more than he knew. "He went to rehab," she said softly. "I told him I'd stand by him and support him, but…I couldn't stay there. At our apartment where he had been with her."

"But that's good," he said, his eyes still locked on hers. He could see her. Really see her. And it scared him, so it had to scare her. "I mean, that you're working things out."

"I don't know what I'm doing," she replied, her eyes shifting to their hands that were still tightly woven together. "I want to stand by him because he needs me, but I need time to figure this out….To deal with what happened…And he thinks time means a separation…." Her voice trailed off and she felt as though she had said to much.

"Does it?" he asked, propping his head up on his hand. He knew she loved him, that her heart belonged with him, but he wanted to hear differently. He needed to hear differently, even if he shouldn't. Not when he had someone at home too.

She shrugged, her eyes gaze roaming back to his face. "Are you asking if we're together?" she asked nervously. She could hardly catch her breath when he nodded. "Depends."

"On?" he asked flatly.

"Which one of us you ask," she replied, looking away from his intense gaze.

"I'm asking you," he said seriously.

"No," she replied, biting her lip. "But that's just because I want this to feel less wrong….If you asked him, it would be different." She sighed, pressing her face into her pillow. "But we were talking about you here, not me…I always do that."

He smiled as he leaned over and pressed a kiss against her forehead. He was surprised by how hot her skin still was and when he looked down at her face, he saw the same desire and need she had before. "It's not wrong unless you make it that way…You love him. You want to help him. That doesn't mean-"

"And you love her," she interrupted hurriedly, as if she needed to remind him. Or maybe she was reminding herself. "You just have to decide whether or not you can get past what she did."

"Can you?" he asked curiously.

She smiled sadly. "It's sad," she replied. "When I was a kid, I had all these romantic images of love. Of it being a princess in a castle. Never unrequited. Always selfless. And all too real…But what's love now? Is it more than an obligation?"

He reached over and brushed her hair from her face. "I don't remember what I thought love was before," he replied, referring to his accident. "I only know what I've learned. And it's everything you just said. It's never unrequited, always selfless, and always very real. That wasn't a dream."

She shrugged. "But it's a reality that neither of us are living."