Chapter Four

Four months ago

She pressed her cell phone between her shoulder and ear as she stepped through the automatic doors leading to the parking lot of the hospital. She held her purse in front of her, digging for her keys. "Yes, I know," she murmured into the phone as he rambled on about the plans for when he came home tomorrow. She shook her bag to move things around and finally her keys came into sight. Taking them in her hand, she threw her purse back over her shoulder, clutching the tiny container of pepper spray in her hand. She hated when she worked late at the hospital. And she hated even more when she had parked clear on the other end of the parking lot, where there was no light. If there was anything she had learned to be afraid of during her life, it was the dark.

He saw her hurrying towards the other end of the parking lot and asked himself why she had parked so far away. He, too, knew what dangers lurked in the dark. He reminded himself it was a hospital parking lot. Not some shady garage or an alley behind an abandoned building. He knew she'd be safe walking towards her car, but for some reason he was worried for her. He started in her direction, then stopped. It had been two weeks since they had been together. He had seen her a couple of times at the hospital and the exchanges were awkward and confusing. Mostly because he had been in a room with the woman he was sleeping with, his girlfriend, and his girlfriend's dying mother. Anyone would be nervous in those conditions. He kept waiting for the ball to drop. Then again, she was classy, as classy as a married woman sleeping with another man could be. She'd never out him like that.

She broke into a sprint when her car came into sight. The night air was cool and quiet. A night perfect for driving around with all the windows down on the way to nowhere. "Yes, I'm still here," she muttered into the phone. She was exhausted. A twelve hour shift that she had been late for. Not to mention the fact that it was supposed to be her day off, but she had picked it up because a room at Kelly's and eating out everyday wasn't coming cheap. This whole situation was becoming costly, on her wallet and her heart. "I'm at my car," she said as she unlocked the door. She cringed when he said I love you and whispered back, "You too," before hanging up the phone. She sighed, cursing to herself when the lock on the door stuck. It always seemed to do that. And that was when she heard the footsteps.

He jumped back when she spun around on him, her pepper spray pointed at him. "It's just me!" he cried, holding his hands up. He could see that she was shaking and she dropped her hand, a string of curse words coming from her lips.

She couldn't believe he was approaching her now. When she was leaving work. After they had seen each other several times in the hospital. Had he followed her? Had he wanted to see her? "Well, it's a good thing you weren't a rapist or a psychopath," she replied when she realized the button wasn't working.

"And it's a good thing you don't know how to work that," he said, reaching over and taking it from her hand. When his fingers grazed hers, he felt a shiver go up his spine. He knew that he should turn around and walk away. He held it up to her face, flicked the safety on the side on, then flicked it back off. "I'd spray it to show you how it works, but then we wouldn't be able to breath."

"I think I can figure it out on my own," she replied, snatching it back. She slipped the key back into the door and jiggled it until the lock finally popped up. She was annoyed and angry, but she wasn't sure if it was at him or at herself?

He could tell that she was and felt guilty. He knew it was partly his fault. It wasn't his style anymore than it was hers to sleep with someone randomly for comfort, to feel better, and then ignore them. But he couldn't rightly walk up to her and kiss her in public, despite how badly he wanted to. "I was heading inside when I saw you," he said to her back.

She had started to slide into the car and stopped. She turned to face him slowly. "And?" she asked folding her arms across her chest.

He shrugged. "It's dark," he replied, looking around. There were no other cars, no other lights, not a single soul within five hundred feet of them. "I wanted to make sure you were okay."

She pushed her hair from her face and realized her hands were trembling. "And if I say I'm not?" she asked, leaning up against the side of the car.

He took a step towards her, a sincere smile spreading across his face. "I'd ask if there's anything I can do to fix it."

She bit her lip and stared at the ground. The dance had begun. She had made the first move, he reciprocated, and now he was waiting for her to give it a go. When had this become a push and pull? Then again, it was comfort sex. It was about giving when the other needed it and taking it when they didn't want to give it. She shifted her eyes to his and could see that he wanted it. "Are you okay?"

He shrugged again. "We're talking about you," he replied, stepping towards her. He reached out and touched her face. "What's wrong?"

She shook her head. "Nothing is wrong," she said as she stepped away from him. "I've seen you almost everyday for the past two weeks…You'd know if something was wrong." She sounded more angry than she had meant to. Could she really be upset that he hadn't come to see her in two weeks? Or should she have found him? She had never been caught up in something like this, didn't know the rules or how the game was played.

"So that's what's wrong."

"I never said it was that."

"Then what is it?"

"Everything else….My job….My car's broken door….Him and stupid rehab!"

He stepped towards her, placed his hand on her face, and lifted it to his. Her eyes were dark and sad. He had a pretty good feeling why, that it had something to do with him. "I'm sorry."

She pulled his hand away from her face. "Don't be." She sighed heavily and looked away. "How is her mother?"

"Not well."

"And how is she?"

"You've seen her. You know," he replied, not really wanting to talk about her. He wanted….Well, what he wanted was anything but this. Something like this shouldn't be a secret. Or was that what made it so good? He was confused. He had spent all his life being honest and true until now. He was breaking every rule he ever made for himself and he had no idea why. Then she glanced up at him, her eyes saying everything she couldn't and he knew why.

She stepped forward, grabbing him by the front of her his shirt, and pulled him to her. She slipped a hand behind his neck, tipped his face to hers, and brushing her lips over his. She kissed him softly and innocently, remembering why she had needed him so bad all the other times. And when she brushed her tongue over his lips and his mouth parted, she slipped her tongue through, starving for the taste of him.

He slipped his arms around her, one hand slipping beneath the thin material of her scrub top, the other pulling at her messy ponytail. He fumbled with her hair for a second, finally pulling at the band so hard that it snapped. She gasped against his lips and he immediately went hard. He wanted now. He pushed her towards the side of the front of the car. She buckled when the back of he knees hit and stumbled, but he lifted her quickly, sitting her on the edge of the car. He broke the kiss long enough to look her in the eye, to make sure that she wanted him.

She nodded, her body and mind no longer connected. She had kissed him first and now all bets were off. She took his face in both her hands and pulled her lips to kiss. She flicked her tongue over his lips, pushed her way into his mouth, letting her teeth graze over his bottom lip. She bit it softly as she pulled away a devilish grin on her face.

He tugged at her hair, forcing her tip her head to the side, his lips grazing over her neck. He flicked his tongue across her cool skin, ran it in circles, before biting down and sucking hard. He knew he caught her by surprise when his teeth sank into her skin and she tightened her grip on his waist and thrust her hips at him. He slipped a hand up the front of her shirt, his fingertips grazing over her skin as he made his way to her breasts. He tugged her bra down, kneading at one of her breast. He ran his thumb over the nipple, pinching it lightly, then harder as her sigh became a moan.

She pulled him into her, wrapping her legs around his waist. She could feel his hard on against her and knew he was ready to take her now. She groaned in frustration when she rubbed herself against him and he pulled away. She pressed her head against his chest when his hand slid across her chest and began kneading her breast in his hand. She was being tortured slowly. She wanted him now.

He pulled her face back to his, slipped his lips over hers, taking her mouth for his own. He felt her hands slide beneath his shirt, and she ran her fingers up and down his chest. He tried to pull away when her finger flicked across the snap of his jeans, but her legs were locked around him. He moaned against her mouth when she slid her hand down the front of the jeans, wrapping her slender fingers around him. "You can't d-"

"I can," she replied, pulling her hands out of his pants suddenly. She placed her hands on his chest and pushed him away, her legs dropping from his waist. She bit her lip as she moved to her feet, then grabbed his shirt, pulling him around to the front of the car.

He was curious, like usual, when she took control. It meant that she wanted to make him feel as good as he did her. And there was no bigger turn on. When she let go of his shirt and shoved him against the car so hard that he fell against the hood, he felt like he was getting hard all over again. He felt one of her hands run between the leg of his jeans, her palm rubbing over him. He cried out, partly from surprise, partly from pleasure. When her saw wink at him, her hands tugging at the sides of his jeans, he knew what she was going to do. He just wasn't sure if he could handle it.

She bit her lip hesitantly, but felt relieved when he raised his hips towards her, letting her tug his jeans and underwear down. She sucked in a breath when she looked down at his hard on, felt her palms grow sweaty. It wasn't like she had never done this before, so why was she nervous? She looked at him one last time, smiling when he nodded. She knew he wanted to do it. She ran her hands over his thighs, squeezing gently, as she dropped to her knees in front of him. She leaned forward, placing her mouth just over his tip, her tongue flicking against him.

His hips bucked against her face immediately and he let out a soft moan. He moaned louder, his hands going instinctively to the back of her hand as her mouth slid over him entirely. He sat up, looking down at her, as she started slide her mouth up and down. He felt her tongue swirl around as she sucked tenderly, her mouth slowly growing tighter around him. His hand tangled in her hair, tugging hard, as he groaned loudly. His voice echoed through the darkness. He tried to remind himself they were in a parking lot. Someone could hear them if they were loud. He knew he couldn't take it for much longer. This wasn't how he wanted to end it, he wanted to be inside of her. "You have to stop," he said, trying to pull away.

"Hmmmmm?" she asked, her mouth still moving against him.

He felt a shiver run over him. And it was hard for him to tell her to stop. "Please…." he moaned, trying to pull himself away from her.

"Hmmmmm?" she asked again, her eyes snapping open and locking on his.

"Dammit," he said, leaning over and pulling her away. He almost came then, he grabbed her the shoulders and shoved her away.

She was almost taken back by his action, but she didn't have much time to think because as quickly as he pushed her away, he was jerking her body towards him. He grabbed her hair, pulling her head back to expose her neck, his tongue brushing over it in long, slow licks. His other hand tugged at the front of her scrubs pants, then in one quick motion he was in. He felt her tighten around him immediately as she tried to rock her hips against his hand. He flicked his thumb across her bud, causing her to moan so loudly that he had to drown the sound with a kiss.

She kissed him hard, her tongue swirling around his. She pushed her body against him and he fell back against the car easily. In seconds, he was on his back and she was on top of him. Her mouth still over his as she pumped her hips against his finger. She felt another finger slide into her and she broke the kiss, pressing her face into his chest as a long moan escaped from her mouth. She wanted to come now. She needed to come now. "Please," she murmured as she rode his fingers.

He grinned at her, taking in the sight of her looming above him. Her head was thrown back in complete pleasure and he knew that he could do whatever she wanted and she wouldn't care. His fingers slipped from inside her as she flipped her over, slamming her hand onto the hood of the car. She cried out loudly and he worried for a second that he had hurt. But then he felt her shoving her own pants down and tugging her shirt up, exposing all of herself to him.

She pulled her scrub top as far as she could it get it, just above her breasts, then pulled his face down to them. She held him against her as he took one nipple in her mouth, biting it lightly, then sucking hard. She wanted him to mark her. She wanted him to make her his. And when the pleasure got to where she could stand it, she pulled his face away, moving it to the other. She tried to push his hand between her legs, aching for him to touch her. It wasn't fair of him to get her so riled up. She ran her hands through his hair, whimpering softly. "Please," she whispered, pulling his face back to hers. She looked him in the eye, her eyes full of desire and need. "Please…Just take me."

God, he had missed that desperation. The way that she needed him as though her life depended on her. He kissed her softly, his tongue licking it's way across her lips, before he pulled back. He tugged her shoes and socks off, then slipped her pants the rest of the way down, letting them fall to the blacktop. He planted on of his hands against the car to steady himself, grabbing one of her legs with the other as he pulled down the hood, slamming into her. He groaned loudly, falling over her. She was tight. Tighter than he remembered and he had to breathe for a second, had to remind himself she needed time to catch up.

She lifted her legs, tightening them around him. When he didn't start to move immediately, she did her best to pull herself against him, but he was careful, making sure she had little movement. She was so caught up in the moment, in the pleasure, that when he didn't allow her to move, she let her own hands wander over the front of her body. She needed to be touched, needed to feel something. And if he wasn't going to do it for her, she would do it for herself.

He watched her hands graze across her breasts, making their way across her stomach. He was drowning in the sound of her whimper and soft cries. He bit his lip in anticipation as her hand continued to move downward and wondered if she would go that far. He watched her hand slide down, her finger slipping over her, and just when she started to rub her tiny bud, he smacked her hand away, replacing it with his thumb.

She felt him pull back, then slam into her, his thumb spinning over her in circles. She withered below him, one hand clutching the hand that was planted beside her head, the other smacking the hood of the car. The sound echoed through the parking lot, but she didn't care. It felt that good. She cried out his name as he continued to slam into her repeatedly. She pressed her face against his wrist, her tongue lashing out across it, her teeth nipping at the soft part of his skin. When she felt the pressure build inside her body and a slow tremble escape, she sunk her teeth into his wrist a loud, blistering moan escaping from her lips.

The second he felt her tighten over him, he all but slammed into her one last time before he was coming with her. He collapsed on top of her, her legs still wrapped around him, forcing him to keep pumping against her. He buried his face in her breasts, his tongue licking her skin as he moaned against her. He felt her hands run through his hair, could hear her sighing softly, her body still shaking below his. He didn't move, couldn't move, until her legs finally fell from his waist. He shifted off of her, holding his body above hers, taking in the sight of her splayed out beneath him.

She kept her head to the side, her heart pounding inside her chest. Her breath was ragged as she panted, trying to bring herself down. She couldn't feel her fingers or toes, let alone think. She lifted a hand to her face, pushing the hair from her eyes, cursing when something got caught in her hair. She tugged her hand away, looking at the strands caught on her diamond ring. The diamond ring she was wearing on her left hand. She sat up suddenly and pushed him away, tears hanging in her eyes.

"What's wrong?" he asked as he stumbled back. He looked her over worriedly. "Did I hurt you or did something-"

"No," she said flatly sliding off the hood of the car. She reached for her pants and tugged them on hurriedly, gathering her shoes in her hands.

"Wait," he replied, grabbing her by the arm. "What's wrong?"

"This!" she screamed, holding up her quivering left hand. "I can't do this! I'm married!"