A/N: Hey guys! Well, you must've noticed that I replaced the chapters' names. I'm not good at those, not even at titles or summaries, so I just took those out. BTW, I think it's really unfair how they space the remaining Gossip Girl episodes out. Did you hear about the spolier that Nate and Blair are going to get closer? i think that might be fun to watch.
Who knows how long I've loved you,
You know I love you still.
Will I wait a lonely lifetime?
If you want me to I will.
-The Beatles
He can count in one hand all the times he's been scared in his life.
He was scared when he'd just been starting with Blair, for all the things he'd felt and could not explain. He was scared when his father died, and left him the company. He was scared when Daniel had been born, fearing that he would not be a good father. And now, now he's scared because those feelings for her he couldn't explain should've gone away years and years ago.
Bu they haven't.
Nothing could explain them, and he's tried everything to forget her. Every trick in the book except marriage, of course. But ever since his son started dating her daughter, he thinks. . .he thinks that he doesn't want to. Not anymore. And he's not an idiot; he damn well knows she's Blair Archibald. She's married, and in love, with two beautiful kids. He has nothing to offer her, not like Nathaniel.
And despite being scared, he knows seeing her is the only way to scratch the itch.
It's not that he enjoys taunting her, really. That's not the reason why he came.
"I was hoping Dorota was delusional when she told me you came," Blair tells him coolly as she arranges her flowers in a vase. Hydrangeas, he notes.
"I feel so welcome," he replies with a light smirk. If he isn't imagining things, he thinks that she looks even more beautiful than last time, which is difficult to, seeing as she always is.
"So why are you here? Nate's at work, and my children are already in school."
"What are you suggesting?" he asks, eyebrows raised. She rolls her eyes and fusses over her flowers more."Well, I heard you were back."
"So you come running here? I'm seriously rethinking you stalking me."
He smirks. "You think so badly of me, Archibald. . .I'm hurt."
"I thought you were incapable of human emotion," she scoffs. "At least your son isn't."
"It was sweet, what he did for your daughter, wasn't it?"
"Yes, it was." She pauses. "But also terrible risky. You should've seen the look on Nate's face."
He pinches the bridge of his nose. "Can we not discuss Nathaniel now?"
"Why?" She raises an eyebrow, her lips curved. "Jealous?"
"Never."
"Good."
She looks at a petal, as he watches, and the hand holding a single stalk falls limp at her side. The moment is surprisingly silent, both having nothing much to say. Chuck thinks it's sad, how they're reduced to fumbling for things to talk about and avoiding each other's eyes.
"What were you thinking, sending me that necklace?"she asks coldly, suddenly.
He stiffens."I apologize for thinking it would be a nice gesture."
"My whole family—and the Humphreys—saw it," she hissed. "And I told you before, I don't want it. Not ever, Chuck. I told you I was done, and we could've been friends, but that's it."
It's like her words are piercing through his heart, and even then, he can't show it. Chuck steels himself against showing emotion, and his eyes flicker to the flowers, anywhere but at her. "You don't mean that."
"I do."
"No, you don't." He looks up and pulls a smirk on his face. "Throw it. Burn it, if you will."
She narrows his eyes, as he draws nearer. "You don't think I can do it."
"Yes, I don't."
"Is that a challenge?"
He shrugs and draws closer, and lowers his voice. "I'm just saying I know you can't."
"Fine," she snaps. Why is she being so cold to him? "Dorota! Light the fireplace for me!"
"Yes Ms. Blair."
She storms up the stairs to her bedroom, and she unlocks a safe and pulls out the necklace from the box. He thinks it's going to be quite a morning, and walks through the master bedroom. It was an elegant room, with a big bed and a view of Manhattan from the windows. An image of Nate and Blair resurfaces in his mind painfully.
"Why did you follow?" she asks.
"So this is where it happens, huh?" he asks, a bitter barb to his smooth voice. There are pictures of their perfect family on the tables. "Not too bad."
He smirks as she rolls her eyes.
She stands before the fireplace, and he's behind her, watching. Chuck pulls on a calm face, assuring himself that she can't, and she won't do it. Blair's a romantic, and she can't. The flames dance dangerously in her eyes.
"I'm waiting, darling," he says lazily.
She prepares, holding up mechanically. It dangles precariously in her fingers, and he stops breathing to see if she'll dare to do it. Perhaps it was a horrible idea. It's not like he'd kept it all those years for nothing, and it just might disappear in a second.
"Anytime now."
"I'm ready." She bites her lips and lets it slip from her grasp and into the waiting fire that swallows it with a short burst. The flames flicker over it, and they both can see what's left of it dying slowly on the wood. He feels her eyes turn to him, but he doesn't move, and he doesn't speak.
He's staring at it quietly, stunned that she actually let it go.
The necklace is him, he thinks. He means nothing to her anymore.
"I honestly didn't think you would," he says quietly. "I guess I was wrong."
"It's not the first time," she responds, surprising him with her soft tone. And when he turns to figure out why, he can see the understanding in her eyes. "Chuck, you shouldn't have come. Even if Nate and the children aren't here now. . .you shouldn't have."
"I know."
"Then why did you?"
"I didn't think," he admits. "I'm sorry."
A heavy silence fills the air.
She nods, lips pursed, and sighs, as if she knows she'll regret what she'll be doing. "Why don't I make it up to you?"
He smirks. "Upstairs? All I need is five minutes."
"No. Um. . .dinner. Maybe tomorrow?" she asks with a smile.
"Is this a pity invitation?"
She frowns impatiently, tugging at her bouquet. It makes him smile, how much of a perfectionist she still is. "Take it or leave it, Bass."
"I'll clear my schedule," he says with a grin. Maybe this is why he came. "Text me where?"
She bites her lip nervously, looking away.
"What?"
"When I bought a new phone years ago, I never put your number in." He can feel his heart sinking in the pit of his stomach again, only deeper. "Why don't you text me?"
"Do you still have the same number?"
"Yes. You have it?" she asks curiously. "Until now?"
He nods, feeling his phone in his pocket; cold, and smooth. It's pathetic that he still has it, and had kept it just to see her name on his contact list from time to time. Sometimes, he would pause and scroll over her name, and key in a text he would never send, or let his finger hover over the "call" button. He just wanted to feel like she wasn't completely gone from her life, which she was, and is.
"Got a date tonight?" Daniel asks with the Bass smirk.
"No, not really," Chuck checks himself in the mirror, fixing his bowtie and his hair. He can't wait to see her. "You? I imagine you and Audrey have some plans?"
"Don't worry, dad. Once you head out, we'll kick in."
"Oh, okay." He chuckles and places a hand on his son's shoulder with a wink. "Just so you know, there's some protection in my drawer and do not use my couch."
"Dad, I'm not eight. It's not something I'm comfortable discussing."
The elevator bell rings, and Audrey walks in, a vision of her mother. Chuck watches Daniel kiss her softly on the lips.
"Good evening, Mr. Bass." She smiles. "Hope it's okay I came tonight."
"You're always welcome here. And by the way, great job turning my son into a gentleman."
"I feel offended," Daniel says, amused. He leans down to whisper into her ear. "He's just referring to this girl he met at our age."
Chuck wonders if Blair's ever told her about what they used to be.
"Really? Well, what happened to her, Mr. Bass?"
He shrugs. "I lost her."
"Did you love her?"
He nods, unable to say it. But he pulls another smirk on his face as Daniel explains to Audrey that he's never told her the girl's name.
"Daniel, remember what I said. . ."
"Dad! Just. . .go and have fun already!" He shakes his head at Audrey's wondering eyes.
"Well," Chuck responds with a shrug. "Proud of you, Daniel. You're growing up."
"We don't have to do this." Daniel smiles shyly as Chuck heads out. "I already know it."
"Good."
He's learned from Bart's mistakes, and he hopes to fix some of his own pretty soon.
The moment the door of the restaurant opens, he begins to search for her. And he smiles when he finds her, and clears his throat. Blair isn't facing his way, of course, and it's his turn to surprise her. Chuck suppresses the urge to run to her.
Then he sees a familiar figure next to her, and he stops.
Reviews, please? Oh, and please tell me what you think about how the ending should go. I know most people are rooting for a happy ending, but we all know most things don't happen like that.