VIII

Deserted

Helga woke up startled by the sound of her own dad banging on the door.

"OLGA! Answer the door! I'm starving!".

She quickly put her pajamas on and opened the door just to find her dad with his arms on his chest and looking menacingly. She yawned, and scrubbed her right eye.

"What do you want?", she just asked.

Big Bob roared, giving Helga a blow of wind and saliva to her face. "I'm hungry! I need to eat and your mom's not here!".

"What do you want me to do about it?", she asked again.

Her father snarled a, "KITCHEN! NOW!".

Helga blinked a few times, understanding the situation. "Oh, so YOU want ME to cook you breakfast!", she laughed sarcastically. "I'm not your maid, you know that!", she put her arms on her chest, doing more than to anger her father. He practically was boiling red. But Helga didn't move a muscle. She was just as stubborn as her father, so it would take time to put her on a maid dress before she was eating ice cream with Phoebe.

Big Bob's anger stopped suddenly, revealing wisdom and trickery. "So…", he cleared his throat. "How did it go last night?", he asked, as he was still forcing himself not to crush his own daughter's neck in his hands, his knuckles white from pressing his hands firmly into fists.

Helga looked surprised at him, disarmed at the question, but she couldn't respond. She started to get nervous. "I…uh…well, it didn't…you know…work, actually", she dismissed it with a sheepish smile.

Her father raised an eyebrown and put his arms over his chest again. "Really? What happened?".

She shot him an uncaring look. "Doesn't even matter…", she shrugged.

"What time did you get here?", he asked, uncaring look.

"Twelve", she responded.

"You sure?", he asked in case she was lying.

"Actually, I found you last night sleeping on the couch with the TV without signal and Miriam in an interesting position, dozed off", she said, as she put her arms over her chest again, still uncaring look.

He blinked for a few seconds, surprised, then smiled. "Sounds about right. You're punished, young lady", he stated.

"Dad. I'm eighteen.", she stated.

"My house, my rules. I told you to get back at eleven. Now, go to the kitchen if you want to get rid of the punishment", he stated.

She cursed under her breath, but accepted the consequences. She was heading downstairs, until he snickered, triumphant smile on his face. "Just so you know, nobody beats Big Bob Pataki!".

Helga stopped right in her tracks, just to turn around an give him a good answer. "Except death…", she mumbled, pressing her teeth together.

Big Bob's face drained out of color. His smile faded. He now looked disarmed. The whole idea of trying to beat death was painful enough, and she knew it. He had two heart attacks in two years, trying to cope with overwork and changing his beloved beepers to new technology, cellphones and tablets, and notebooks, and resolving a non-existent economic crisis.

Now she smiled triumphantly. "Don't worry, Blob, I'll make something without cholesterol". She laughed.

Half an hour later, Miriam came home and went inside the kitchen to find Bob at the table, shaking, scared, still trying to get his yogurt past his mouth. His breakfast consisted on the same yogurt, diet crackers, a small coffee latte and a small piece of vanilla cream cake. Loving the view of Bob suffering was Helga, smiling devishly, enjoying her delicious honey pancakes, all done by herself. Miriam dropped the few supplies she brought from the supermarket, including a small bottle of vodka that was suddenly appearing and disappearing from her coat as she moved fast, and turned to assist her husband.

"Oh, honey! Did she do this again?", she asked, placing comforting hands on Bob's shoulders.

Bob only nodded, still messing with his yogurt. Miriam turned to frown at Helga, who frowned back.

"Helga, how many times I've told you to leave your father's medical crisis alone?", Miriam slurred.

Helga acted as if she was pondering the question. "Mmmmm… I guess it's the first time".

Miriam suppressed a hiccup, covered by exaggerated surprise. "Oh no, I'm sure I told you before! I guess…".

Her daughter gulped a pancake and replied a "Just shut up and join me to eat pancakes".

Miriam just sighed. "Okay, I guess I could eat a few…", she slurred again, dragging her foot to take a plate, just when Bob recovered his own mind.

"She's the devil, Miriam! She's got power over us! I say we get rid of the damn thing!", he screamed as he punched the table and got his pants and shirt dirt of yogurt. Helga rolled her eyes at her definition of 'thing'.

"Whatever you say, sweetiee… zzzz", her wife said as she fell asleep, her face on her pancakes.

Helga choked on a pancake. "Look, Blob! I only got two weeks to get my ass out of this damn house! If you don't like it, I get it, but just don't even think about fucking my vacations!".

Bob took the offensive, knowing with a smile that her daughter was scared of being thrown away so soon. "Is that so? Then you should be thankful you're going away, we spent too much effort in you!".

Helga raised an eyebrown. "If you mean studying, I didn't need help, I had thirteen years going to school on my own. If you mean money, I've got a full scholarship and everything paid off, something Miss All Perfection Olga couldn't even achieve. And if you mean you guys are terrific parents, well… newsflash!", she screamed aloud, dropping her fork. "You guys seriously need teraphy!".

Bob was lost at words. It took him a few seconds to shrug it off, determined to get rid of his own unwanted daughter once and for all. "Well then, what are you waiting for? Go live your life! The only thing I ask you for is a good breakfast and you treat me like some kind of… pig! What is this? Yogurt? Who does eat yogurt!", he was boiling red at the sight of his pants. "Damn it, get the hell out of my house!", he commanded.

Miriam woke up. "Can I come toooo…? zzzzzzzz". she placed her head over her pancakes, staining her hair and face in honey.

Helga jumped from her seat. "Damn you! Who needs you and your stupid yelling?! I'm going to my room to get my stuff!", she screamed.

"I'll personally check there's not even a single remnant of you in this house!", he screamed and punched the table, now dirtying himself in coffee.

Helga pulled a big bag and placed her clothes, her diary, her old locket with Arnold's picture in it, and some make up her sister Olga left for her and never used. She went to her parents room and pulled a wallet from one of Big Bob's pants, and took the money in it, without even caring she threw the pants over the window to fall in a bald guy's face. She dragged her bag through the stairs, and headed to the main door. She opened it, just to receive a huge screaming from the kitchen, "AND LEAVE THE KEYS!".

Helga screamed back a "I'll leave them to the mafia, maybe they will like this house for a poker reunion!", and with that, she closed the door behind her.

Realizing she was now homeless, she dragged her feet and her bag to the nearby alley to cry in loneliness.

R&R people! More coming soon!