A/N: Almost April 1, and I still have a million things to take care of!

"I snuck away this morning. Nate didn't look too convinced when I told him I just went home late and woke early," Blair tells Serena blankly, her voice quiet. "I feel so. . .dirty."

"And what did Chuck say?"

"Nothing. He was still asleep."

"The night before?"

Blair pauses and looks at Serena. "He told me he loved me again. But then again, he was drunk both time—"

"Both times? Again?" Serena questions incredulously. "Blair, when did the last time happen?"

"That's not important," Blair says—nearly pulling her own hair in frustration—, waving her hand. "S, I've committed adultery! I'm not religious but it's still horrible. And it's not like in high school. Now, I have children and a life!"

Serena looks at her, in thought. "Would you do it again?" she asks after a moment.

Blair opens her mouth to answer, but hesitates.

"Oh my God, you would!"

"I didn't say anything!"

"You didn't have to; I saw it in you."

"What am I going to do?" she asked, groaning. "I mean, I love Nate too."

"So you're saying you love Chuck?" Serena asks pointedly.

"I don't know," Blair admits, biting her lower lip. "S, help me. I think I might."

The doorbell rings again, and Serena tells her rushing maid that she'll get the door. She swings the door open, still facing Blair.

"So now that you and Chuck—"

Speaking of the devil.

"Chuck, what are you doing here?"

"Nathaniel told me Blair was here," he says, stepping in quickly. Blair frowns at him from the living room as he walks in with Serena right behind.

"Come in," Serena mutters. "But what are you doing here?"

"Are you out of your mind? Going to Nate the day after you had his wife?" Blair demands, her voice shakily angry. "Don't you know anything, Bass?"

"I know when I woke up this morning, you weren't beside me anymore. Blair, please, what was I supposed to do?" he asks. She can hear the silent frustration in his voice.

"Call, maybe?" Blair replies icily.

"Look, you guys, you both obviously have to talk," Serena interjects. "But could you just tone it down a bit? I don't want my children knowing these things."

"We do not have to talk," Blair retorts. "I'm married, and that's it."

"That's it? We sleep together for one night and that's it? It's not like there's no strings attached or anything," Chuck replies sarcastically.

"That's exactly it. There are strings attached, and between you and my family, there's no competition. I can't leave them."

"So why did you let me do it then? Last night."

"I wasn't. . .ready, for it," she answers uncertainly. "You caught me by surprise, and that will never happen again."

Chuck sighs. Blair's going into denial mode again, just when he'd thought something was happening. He throws a quick glance at Serena, who nods and disappears into the kitchen.

"Blair, don't do this."

"Do what?"

"That. Running away."

"Why not? You did it."

"I didn't do it for two decades," he points out. "Aren't you tired of it? I am."

"Then what am I supposed to do?" she asks. "Leave everyone I love and run to you? Then how long are we going to last—a couple of weeks, months, a year?"

"Don't you love me?"

The question lingers in the air as he watches her features for a reaction. A part of her stiffens, and withdraws a little, looking unsure. Does he disgust her with this emotional talk? It's not like him, he knows that, but with Blair.. .things were always different.

No matter, he doesn't want to care anymore; he's throwing everything for her, except Daniel; his pride, and the game. Everything.

"I. . .I don't know."

"It's a simple question, Blair."

She looks away, her eyes filling with tears that if he hadn't been watching intently he would've never seen.

"And I promise you, it won't be just for a short while. It's different this time—"

"Because we have children and obligations."

"Forget about that for a minute," he tells her, earning a shocked, horrified look. "Don't involve them first. This is about you and me, but you make the choice."

"I can't. I can't decide everything now, Chuck. You can't expect me to," she says, shaking her head. "You think this is easy for me? It's not."

"I know. It isn't easy for me either," he admits gently. "But we can't be miserable all our lives—"

"I'm not."

"I am," he offers softly. "And I know I have a son to take care of, but sometimes, I just want to be selfish, think of me. It's that I know I was wrong, and I can do so much better that's the worst part."

Despite herself, Blair could not suppress the curl of her lips. "Nice speech, Bass."

He grins. "Is it enough to convince you?"

She sighs, throwing her hands up in the air in exasperation. "Not quite."

It reminded him of older times, when he and Blair would stay locked up in a room for hours, plotting and planning against somebody else. They would rack their heads and drink until they had a solution none of them could shoot down with flaws. But this time, it feels so much different. For one, Chuck isn't even sure who they're fighting.

"How about we. . ." Chuck paces the room, his eyes absentmindedly trailing the Humphrey family's vacation pictures on the mantelpiece. "Get away for awhile."

"What? Are you still drunk?"

"No," he says, breaking a smile. "You know, we could go somewhere, figure things out, see if we can last a few days without killing each other."

She frowns disapprovingly. He knows it's not her nature.

"Won't that just be even more wrong?"

"We're halfway deep into sin already."

"So why would you want to sink in deeper?"

He shrugs. "It might help. Come one, after this, we'll have a better shot of making a choice."

He meets her eyes, hoping she would see how sincere he is in this with her. Just because he's in love doesn't mean he's irrational—for the most part—he knows this is crazy, even for them. He's not intentionally destroying their marriage, he reasons, because he cares about Nathaniel, which is why they're doing it in secret. What he didn't know couldn't hurt him.

"Blair?"

"You really think this is going to help us?"

"If not, what will?" Chuck gets on his knees before her, looking up closely, so that her eyes are all he can see. "Look, the Bass jet can take us anywhere. No one would know. It won't hurt anyone, all right? We need this."

"This is a crazy plan, Chuck," she whispers.

"I know."

"I'll. . .I'll think about it."

He allows himself to smile, his own heart fluttering along to the butterflies. It wasn't forever, but a few days would be enough for now. He would make her see how much he loved her.

Blair shakes her head and turns sideways. "What kind of mother am I? Audrey and Josiah don't need this. . .Nate doesn't deserve this."

"My son wouldn't like it either," he tells her, soaking the guilt up. "But we have to do what we think is best."

For a moment there, he thinks she's going to retort that, the "best" that they could do. But Blair just glances at him, listless, as if he had said nothing at all.

"The company will be okay with it?"

Chuck thinks of his board of directors, his associates and all the papers mounting high on his desk. It could not compare to living without Blair.

"They'll be fine for a couple of days."

"Where do we go? It's not easy for us to disappear."

He grins. "I think I know the perfect place, since we're now officially having an affair."

"Oh, what did I get myself into?" she moans softly, with a small, smile, tucked behind her lips. It isn't much, just a hidden one, but it's enough to make him feel better.

"It's just the beginning."

My biggest fear or challenge in this chapter was making it more "real". I didn't want Blair and Chuck to suddenly forget about their responsibilities. . .I think I did a terrible job at it, but you tell me, please!