XII

What happens if you don't listen

Although there was tension built up in the house, and they were the only ones at home, Arnold resolved to talk to Helga the next morning, as he opened the covers of his own bed and drifted off to sleep. A dream came to his head, making him roll over the sides and mumble things.

Helga was walking down the aisle of what seemed to be a nicely built Jupah at the center of a beautiful garden, although he didn't think of Helga becoming the marrying religious type. Another Arnold, just like him, drunk, red eyed, bowtie loose, bottle of whisky in hand was poorly dressed in time as a best man, which made himself freak out and ponder who was the fiancée. The Rabi accepted their consolidation in matrimony by writing the papers, and when Arnold touched the shoulder of the fiancée to turn him around, he was shocked to learn it was none other than brainy Brainy, who in return gave him a creepy, under-the-flashlight smile.

Arnold woke up sweating and somehow exhausted. He glanced at his clock and read 1.30 AM. It couldn't be. Helga would never leave him forever, would she? He chuckled as he thought it was just a bad dream.

At 9 in the morning, Helga stirred as she felt sudden pounds at her new bedroom door.

"I'm coming! I'm coming, geez!", she screamed, as she started putting on her pants, and socks, and her bra.

She stepped off the bed, and walked to the door. She opened and glared at who was the one who interrupted her sleep. Her death look at Arnold only softened seconds later when he, himself, brought her breakfast on a tray.

"Why?".

Arnold looked confused at her, as he gave her the tray in her hands. "It's a service for guests", he explained. "Well, at least since grandpa died, I decided to bring breakfast to the boarders. As I explained to them, I wanted this to be more like an hotel, with housekeepers and such. They didn't like it, of course. There was a big difference between renting a room for a month and renting said room for a day, and that was partially the reason they mutinied against me. They even thought I was going to raise the rent. So…".

She put the tray in her bed and sighed. "Arnold. You have a good heart, really good heart, But you make soo much stupid decisions!".

He stared at her, questioningly. "I'm sorry, but I'm not getting it. You decided I was going to sleep outside your new room, even when we had the most amazing-".

She cut him off, raising her arms up in protest. "It's not that, Arnold-o! It's about yourself and your life!".

He put his arms over his chest. "What about my life?".

"You think I'm blind enough that I didn't even notice you've never suffered from abstinence after all this time? You think I don't know that junkies conserve some of their weed while going to rehab?", she retorted.

"No, I just try to cope by smoking cigarettes until I start next monday", he stated, matter-of-factly.

She raised an eyebrown. "Oh, really? Then why did I just dream last night we were married, had two kids, BUT you were a bum, I was an alcoholic, and a smoker, AND I was pregnant, and we were using your college money to survive?".

His jaw fell in shock, and his eyes widened. He was lost for words. "Uhh..".

"You do get why I was last night pissed off now…", she lowered down her head, and sighed heavily.

"I had a dream of my own", he said. She raised her head up and looked at him. "You just married Brainy".

Now it was her turn to be surprised. Well, mostly. "W-well yeah, buck-o! I'll marry who I want! I'm Helga Marrying Pataki! But now to the point!", she put a finger to his chest, not playfully, but hard. "You want us to stay here, rotting and living like failures or you want us to succeed? It's up to you, Arnold-o!". As she said that, she went to the bed and grabbed a toasted cheese sandwich, which she had to admit, was delicious.

She was right. Arnold raised a finger up the air to re-establish his decision. "I..uh…".

There was a doorbell ring.

Arnold and Helga looked at each other, and he went to open the door. A lawyer stepped inside without warning.

"Arnold… Sherm—Shortman?", the lawyer asked.

"Yes?", he replied.

"The name's Phil Hartman, Mr. Shortman. I'm on behalf of Miss Rhonda Wellington Lloyd, regarding a succession. She's suing you for rape and stalking, and because she claims she's a long lost niece to the family of your grandmother. All of your bank accounts are clean and untouched because it's a college fund but your life insurance have been blocked.", he explained, as Arnold widened his eyes more and more in shock at each word. "You have been served. Have a good day", he said as he handed him a yellow paper. The lawyer gave a curt nod to him and Helga, who was watching the whole scene, and then he left.

Arnold stared at the guy step into his BMW and speed away. Then, he stared at Helga, desperatedly, like, finding hope from her.

"Don't look at me, football head! Call your own lawyer this instant!", she immediately replied to his stare.

"Right!", he went to the phone, only to find the line was dead.

Also the lights suddenly went off. "Strange… we're in May 26th… the phone bill and the electricity should've been paid off!".

He went upstairs to his room and searched for his cellphone. He returned while talking to his cellphone to his lawyer. "….no, no, I don't know why she sued! We ended a two week relationship. She's rich, she's not married to anyone of my family and her last name is Lloyd….", he said as he waited for a response. His eyes widened, as he glared to the wall. "What do you mean she's adopted?! Her parents are her biological… oh… I see… but, I'm a blond, and she's brunette! Alright I'll call you later".

He clicked on his cellphone and used it to ask his accountant.

"Hi, this is Arnold Shortman. I'm calling because my bank accounts have been searched and my life insurance has been blocked. Contact me when you can".

Helga looked at the whole scene in silence. His lawyer called again, apologizing and told him his life insurance would be opened again once the court settled an arrangement. Also, because of the fees he was charging on him, he wouldn't have any insurance payment for at least 6 months. He cursed under his breath, and hung up his lawyer, then looked at Helga.

"I'm sorry… I'm just… I don't know what to do…", he sighed heavily, as he sat on the staircase, miserably.

Helga approached him and slapped his face. "What do you mean you don't know?! I know! You can move your ass and start searching for new boarders! And I MYSELF...", she pointed at her chest with confidence, "...can be a co-manager".

His eyes opened wide as he smiled of joy. "Helga! That's a terrific idea! I'll start looking right now!".

She smiled openly at him. But soon, it faded when she remembered something. "Oh… just… one recommendation... Don't even suggest talking to Stinky".

Arnold's jaw dropped. How did she knew? "What? Why not?".

"He will search for new people when pigs fly", she stated, matter-of-factly.

"Is that on your dream, too?", he asked, surprised.

"Yep!", she replied.

"Damn… we have to get some money now…", he said, as he bit his nails, nervously.

Helga slapped her forehead. "This is going to be a looong day...".