What's worst than awkward fluff? Public embarrassment and awkward fluff! Woo hoo!

Disclaimer: If only...then I could get to see this scene for real...

...

Cam sat at the reserved table waiting for her date, Austin, to arrive. He was a fellow pathologist and they had met at a conference months before. Now that he was in town he had called her to ask her out. She was looking forward to seeing him again. The clinging, knee length white dress she had on that was currently cutting off her circulation definitely communicated that. She even left her hair down in waves around her face and wore a pair of impossibly high heels. Austin was definitely worth it.

"Hi, Dr. Saroyan."

Cam looked up to see Zach.

"Hey, Zach. What are you doing here?"

"I have a date. Do you know the new Paleontology intern?"

"Nerissa? You have a date with Nerissa?"

"Yes," Zach said in his robot drone, like he didn't know the significance of getting a date with Nerissa when all the interns and some of the doctors were vying for the same honour.

"Wow. Is she here yet?"

"No."

She patted the place in front of her, "Come. Keep me company till our dates arrive."

He sat down, "You look very nice, Dr. Saroyan."

"Thank you Zach. That is some case we're working on, isn't it?"

"Yes it is. It is more interesting because of the bite marks on the victim. I still am not convinced that..."

"Zach, how many times must I tell you and Hodgins that there are no such things as Chupacabras?"

"Nobody knows for certain, Dr. Saroyan."

"There is no concrete evidence to say that there are any."

"No. But their existence could explain what exactly had eaten Mark Ferguson after he was shot."

"It could just as well be a deformed dog or something, Zach."

"That is a valid explanation, Dr. Saroyan, but..." he cut himself off, "Um...Don't feel offended, but I really hate that necklace."

"What?" Cam touched the red beaded necklace she had thought looked perfect with the red shoes she was wearing.

"I-I'm sorry, Dr. Saroyan. I shouldn't have..."

"No, tell me. What about it?"

"Um..." Zach looked slightly uncomfortable, "The beads and the dress are both very bold. Together, they try to fight for dominance of the outfit. It would be best to eliminate one."

Hmm. Zach Addy, wardrobe designer, Cam thought as she fingered the clasp of the necklace open.

"Thank you, Zach for your honest- dammit."

She had tugged on the necklace too hard and it popped, sending beads across the table and onto the floor.

"Don't worry, I'll pick them up," she said as Zach motioned to pick up the beads. She got down on her hands and knees and picked up the beads. To get to some of them, she had to crawl under the table.

Dr. Saroyan was under the table and several things that shouldn't have crossed Zach's mind crossed it anyway. The possibility of those things happening were very slim. Actually they were nonexistent. But that didn't stop his heart from racing as he heard her shuffle underneath the table.

"Hold these for me," Dr. Saroyan's hand came up from under the table, full of beads. He took them from her and put them in a plate in front of him, trying to dismiss the fact that her hand came up from under the table in his lap.

"Um, Dr. Saroyan?"

"Yes Zach."

"Does your date have spiky black hair, a large build, green eyes and a goatee?"

"He's here?"

Austin walked up to the table, surprised to see some geeky-looking guy where his date was supposed to be.

"Who the hell are you?" he asked the geek.

"I'm Zach. Nice to meet you."

"Where's Cam?"

Zach felt said person's hand on his knee, and he supposed she had absentmindedly rested her hand there while taking up more beads. But his blood pressure elevated regardless.

"Uh..." The hand on Zach's leg moved. What was she doing under there? "She..."

"Zach, what are you doing over here? Our table's over there," said Nerissa as she came walking over.

"I know."

"Alright, moron, where's Cam?" asked Austin again.

"Cam? As in Dr. Saroyan? That's Zach's boss," Nerissa added.

"Is there a problem?" the maitre d' came over. By now the whole restaurant was looking on.

"No," said Zach.

"Of course there's a problem! Where's my date?!" Austin exclaimed.

The hand on his thigh shifted again, making Zach jump in his chair in surprise. Which made Cam jump under the table. Which made her hit her head on the underside of the table. Which sent the table two centimetres into the air.

"Ow!" her voice came from under the table.

Austin, Nerissa, the maitre d' and the patrons of the restaurant all looked at the table in surprise.

"She is under the table," said Zach. Austin and Nerissa had similar looks of confusion on their faces.

Then Cam crawled from under the table.

"My necklace broke," Cam started explaining immediately, still on her knees, "I was taking them up and some rolled under the table," she held up the beads as evidence.

"Oh," said Austin and Nerissa simultaneously. The maitre d' was smiling broadly.

"B-Bye Dr. Saroyan," said Zach as Nerissa grabbed him by the hand an drew him to their table.

"Bye Zach. Have a good time," realizing she was still on the floor, Cam got up and turned her attention to Austin.

"So," she said, "How have you been?"

...

I'm eeevil! I'm eeevil! I'm evil, evil, eeevil!

Alright. Okay. I know. THAT would neeeeever happen! At least not outside my twisted mind.

Have I appeased anyone? Have I redirected anyone's lunch? Tell me! Review!