Chapter Seven
I'm thrilled that people are actually reading my fic, thank you all so much! Many thanks to all of you who have left your feedback, it means a great deal to me! And last but not least, thanks to my lovely beta, Lady Darksbane for all her help. You are awesome, sweetie!
This chapter is mostly dark, and there are scenes that are graphic, so fair warning!
Please don't hesitate to leave a comment, your feedback is always welcome! :D
…
Cullen never got the chance to speak to Beatrix before she left. And on that very morning, the nobles started to arrive. He frowned as their carriages stopped by the main gates, while a couple of scouts opened their doors and helped them out. He saw Josephine greeting them, and wave him over. Clenching his teeth, he did as the Ambassador asked, stopping only when he was right beside her. Frowning inwardly, he bowed to the nobles and kept quiet, letting Josephine do all the talking as they walked through the gates and towards the Chantry.
Josephine opened the Chantry doors and gestured to scouts who were holding trays bearing refreshments. The Chantry had benches where the nobles sat, drinking their wine and nibbling on different cheeses and pastries. He didn't know where Josephine had gotten these delicacies, but truthfully did not want to know either.
"I received letters early this morning. The rest of the families who are supporting us are travelling here as we speak. They should arrive soon!"
Cullen nodded once. "I'll have to go see Krem and the Chargers then," he muttered, bowing to the nobles as he turned to walk away.
"Hurry back, Commander!" Josephine asked in a clear voice before he managed to even get to the Chantry doors. "We still have much to discuss."
Cullen sighed as he went outside, a headache suddenly flaring to life. Of all the things he expected today, entertaining nobles was the least of those on his list. In fact, this wasn't on his list at all. Bracing himself for the day ahead, Cullen stepped outside the gates and turned left, a scowl on his face.
"Good morning, Commander," Krem said with a smile. "I see the nobles are arriving."
"Yes, Krem," Cullen replied with a sigh. "More of the families who support us on are their way. We'll be leaving for Therinfal Redoubt as soon as they arrive."
Krem nodded at this with a smile. "Don't like nobles either," he announced to Cullen. "Don't mind looking after them with the Chargers around, though."
"Then it's fortunate that at least one of us will be amused," Cullen replied. "See you later, Krem."
Krem inclined his head, the smile deepening and Cullen turned, eager to get to his cabin and splash some cold water on his face.
Bloody headache.
…
As it turned out, they left without incident two days later, but also without having received any word from Sister Nightingale, the Herald or her team. Cullen assured the Ambassador that they were probably still traveling to the Hinterlands, hoping to calm her. He did not. Josephine was still a wreck, making sure the nobles were comfortable throughout the journey the best she could.
Their first stop was a large inn on the way where they rested and replenished their supplies. Soon they would be heading into the wilderness, as the Seeker fortress was in an area that was not very well known – there were no settlements or villages around. He made sure that Josephine informed the nobles so they could get all the extra luxury items they were accustomed to and not complain when they finally arrived.
Then again, they were nobles. Nobles always complained.
That night, Cullen stopped by the Chargers' tents. They had chosen to remain camped outside the inn, and were laughing at something just as Cullen approached. A fire was cackling merrily in front of the tents, and the Chargers were sitting around it, forming a tight circle. Krem stepped out of a tent and nodded at Cullen.
"Commander," he saluted as he sat next to Rocky. "Anything to report?"
"Just making sure you are all alright and ready for travel," Cullen replied, a smile on his face.
"Looks like we are," Krem smiled back. "Any problems with our 'guests'?"
"They're complaining, as usual," Cullen sighed. "So, no. No problems I can readily discern."
Cullen sat on one of the benches next to the Chargers before he continued speaking. Krem handed him a wine skin and he smiled gratefully before he drank. The wine was delicious and it would probably help him catch a few hours of sleep.
"We're heading out tomorrow. Maker only knows at what time," Cullen informed the group a few moments later, handing the wine skin back to Krem. "Stay as close to the nobles' carriages as you can."
"No worries, Commander," Krem replied. "We have experience handling nobles. We won't do anything to scare them."
With a grin, Cullen left the group and headed back to the dreaded inn where all the nobles were. He sighed deeply, his thoughts on Beatrix, wondering if she had reached Redcliffe by now.
"Maker, please keep her safe," he murmured to himself, stopping at the inn door. He looked up at the night sky. One star that was shining brightly caught his eye and he smiled briefly, remembering the twinkle in her eyes whenever she teased him.
After a while he went inside, the light and brightness of the star shining deeply within him, nurturing his very soul.
He would sleep well tonight.
…
Things had gone horribly wrong at Redcliffe Castle.
Beatrix had found herself dragged into a time rift with Dorian. They discovered very quickly that they were a year ahead and it was awful. Red Lyrium grew from Fiona as she warned them about an 'Elder One' who was rapidly destroying the entire world. She also informed Beatrix that her Spymaster was kept somewhere in the dungeons and was alive.
The rest of her companions told her about this Elder One's destruction – that his people had assassinated Empress Celene, and that his demon army was annihilating mankind. Her companions had been infected with Red Lyrium – their eyes now bloodshot, their voices cracked and broken. They travelled through the castle dungeons, searching for any clue that would take them to Leliana. Some of the walls were covered with red lyrium, some of the corridors were blocked by the red lyrium blocks, shooting upwards towards the sky.
Beatrix had to keep reminding herself that this was the future – a future that she could change, must change if she could. Grimly she walked the corridors; her mind focused on the Spymaster, vowing to kill any Venatori along the way.
According to one of the tomes found in one of the rooms, Leliana was being used for experiments. She was resistant to the Taint, and Alexius wanted to find out why. Beatrix nearly lost it right then and there after she finished reading. Now more than ever, she was determined to find her and then deal with Alexius shortly afterwards.
Oh yes. She would deal with Alexius all right.
It was the anger that kept her going. Her fists were constantly clenching and unclenching every time she reached a dead end or an empty room. She felt that somehow they were running out of time, trapped in an unending red nightmare.
"Beatrix," Cassandra said as softly as she could, because her voice wasn't soft at all. Beatrix clenched her fists again. Because her voice had been altered. Because her friends were going to die if she didn't fix this mess.
"I'm going to fucking kill him," she finally said, loud enough that everyone could hear her. "How DARE he do this? How DARE he?"
"He used to be quite the man and mage. I looked up to him," Dorian said. "Funny how different things turned out."
Beatrix turned. "We must find the torture chambers. Anyone see a corridor or flight of stairs we missed?"
"I believe I can help," Solas said. "We passed by a corridor we haven't been in when we last went down to the lower dungeons."
"Do you remember where it was exactly?" Beatrix asked.
"I do," Solas replied, inclining his head slightly.
"Good. I can't wait to kill something," Beatrix deadpanned. "We follow you then."
…
They were almost to the Seeker fortress, when Cullen spotted movement ahead. A group of men were approaching them. He held up his hand to stop the procession behind him and waited.
Cullen was able to discern that they were wearing templar armor. When they reached him, the leader looked at Cullen who had already dismounted.
"Ser!" the man leading the rest said. "If you are going to Therinfal Redoubt, I'd suggest you turn. There is nothing left there to see."
"What do you mean by 'nothing left'," Cullen asked.
"We are the only ones remaining, Knight Captain," the man replied, recognizing Cullen from Kirkwall where he had been stationed several years back, before he was sent to the White Spire in Orlais.
"That is no longer my title," Cullen said shaking his head. Then he looked behind the group and stared at the fortress looming up before them. "Tell me what happened."
"The rest of the templars were taking some kind of lyrium that infected them. It was red, Ser. We fought against them and ran when the demon attacked us," the templar replied. "We are the sole survivors. The demon made them fight each other when it saw they could not force us to drink that red lyrium, Ser."
"A demon attacked you?" Cullen repeated, unable to believe what he was hearing.
"Yes, Ser. We believe it had taken the shape of the Lord Seeker, but we never saw him inside the fortress, Ser."
"I see," Cullen replied, looking at the templars behind the man who was speaking. "They aren't infected?"
"No, Ser," he replied. "I ordered them not to drink and they complied because I'm their commanding officer."
Cullen turned around, searching for the Chargers. "Krem!" he called, as soon as he spotted him.
Krem walked up to Cullen and the templars, the twenty or so men he was commanding following him.
"Yes, Commander? How can we assist?" Krem saluted, nodding to the man who was talking to Cullen.
"There's a demon in the fortress," Cullen replied quietly. "We cannot let this fiend loose into the world. Find and kill it."
"Aye!" Krem said and turned to his group. He explained quickly what they were going to do, and walked off with them to the Seeker fortress.
"Will you be joining the Inquisition?" Cullen asked the templar he had been talking to. "We are in need of templars such as yourselves."
"We would be honored, Ser," the templar replied quickly, saluting Cullen reverently. The rest of the men with him did the same.
"There is no need for such formality," Cullen said, a faint blush appearing suddenly on his cheeks. "Welcome to the Inquisition."
The man smiled, his green eyes shining with hope and determination.
"What's your name, Lieutenant?" Cullen asked as he smiled back at him.
"Delrin, Ser. Lieutenant Delrin Barris, at your service."
…
Beatrix had managed to rescue Leliana, or what was left of her. The Spymaster's face was a crisscross of wrinkles, her eyes were dull and almost lifeless, and they had practically torn off pieces of skin for the experiments. It made Beatrix want to kill Alexius even more than before. But they had to reach him first.
They arrived at the docks, killing two mages that had been possessed by demons and then stepped out into the courtyard. The Breach was now directly above their heads enveloping everything around them in an eerie green light. As they walked forwards, they could see a rift seemingly waiting for them. It popped and crackled, the demons attacking them immediately. These weren't that hard to kill, for most of them were wisps at the beginning. But when a second wave appeared, they were all armored shades.
Once those demons were dispatched and Beatrix closed the rift, they noticed yet another rift, almost at the end of the courtyard. This one was feeding directly into a massive red lyrium block that was occupying the center of the area. Beatrix leapt to the first demon that appeared. Screaming a plethora of curses, she slashed into it, and then disappeared into the shadows.
"Keep off the areas that slow you down!" Dorian yelled at the group as the first group of terrors appeared. "There are other areas that speed you up, use those!"
"I knew there would be more of those!" the Bull boomed out joyfully, as he decapitated one of the terrors.
"There's a faster one here," Solas yelled out, stepping into the area. His spells annihilated the rest of the demons easily and Beatrix closed the rift with an audible snap.
Something was glinting. Something in the red lyrium block that was on her left. Cassandra had already approached it, and gave a gasp. She quickly rushed towards Beatrix, trying to stop her from reaching the massive block.
"What?" Beatrix asked, her eyes on the Seeker's bloodshot ones. "What did you see?"
"Beatrix, it's better you don't –" But Beatrix pushed the Seeker away and marched straight up to it, stopping directly in front of it. Her mouth opened and a scream came out that made the rest rush to her side.
What was left of Commander Cullen was his fur mantle cloak, and his blond hair. There was no skin and very little flesh on him. He was just a skeleton, his mouth open in a silent scream.
There was a notice nailed to what was left of his chestplate which glinted in the sickly green light. The words on it only added to Beatrix's tears and screams.
'There is no Maker. We serve only the Elder One.'
Beatrix dropped to her knees, screaming over and over again. Dorian reached out to her, but she slapped his arm and hand away. There was no comforting her.
Leliana stepped close to her and spoke. "Herald," she said in a quiet tone.
Beatrix stopped screaming – the sobs wracking her body.
"Herald," Leliana spoke again. This time she continued. "If we do not stop Alexius, we will all succumb to the Elder One. You will NOT get your revenge. Is this what you want? Don't you want to avenge the Commander's death?"
The sobs quieted down. A short while later, she stood with Dorian and Cassandra's help.
"You're right, Sister Nightingale," she said quietly. "I'm going to kill Alexius for this. But I'll make him suffer first."
"You and me, both, Herald," Leliana replied, her eyes cold and hard. "You and me, both."
…
As soon as Cullen and the rest arrived in Haven, he received a missive from the Herald herself. Opening it with trembling hands, his eyes widened as he read the two sentences on it.
Allied with the mages. Coming home soon.
Cullen let out a half-growl, startling the messenger that was standing near him. He turned to Barris, who was standing behind him and asked him if he could watch over his training recruits. Barris nodded and inclined his head, wondering what had set the Commander off so badly that he had to drop everything he was doing.
Marching into the Chantry, he veered off to the left, pushing open the door to the Ambassador's office, and striding in, thunder and lightning in his eyes as he walked to her desk.
A very startled Josephine looked up at him, the confusion on her face making him throw what looked like a missive on her desk. "Read it!" he ordered, his voice an angry snarl.
Josephine took the missive with trembling hands and read it quickly, one of her hands immediately flying to her mouth. Cullen said nothing and did nothing but clench his hands over the pommel of his sword repeatedly.
"Oh, my!" Josephine finally uttered, if only to break the heavy tension in the room.
It seemed that this was what Cullen had been waiting for, because he started to yell as he paced the room. Minaeve took one look at what was happening and sneaked away, closing the door behind her.
"She is the most IRRESPONSIBLE and RECKLESS person I've ever known! Does she not know what danger she puts our people in?" Cullen yelled.
"But, we have some templars," Josephine cut in, and he turned his head, the anger in his eyes making the Ambassador flinch involuntarily.
"Yes, not nearly enough for the number of mages she is bringing! This is the ENTIRE group of mages that never made it to the Conclave! There are mages there that were with Grand Enchanter Fiona when the voting took place in Orlais! From all over Thedas! And with the Breach not yet closed, some of them could very well be possessed by demons!"
Cullen stopped to catch his breath, pinching the bridge of his nose as he sighed deeply, trying to gather at least some control over his anger and disappointment.
Josephine said nothing, not wishing to set him off again.
After a while, he looked at her, his eyes still angry.
"I'm sorry Ambassador. I did not mean to yell. It is not your fault," Cullen rasped out, shaking his head. "I hope you can forgive my outburst." His hands were trembling as he reached out for the missive and Josephine looked at him, a worried expression on her face.
"Are you alright?" she asked, the concern in her voice dragging out a bark of a laugh from him.
"Lady Ambassador, I am never alright when it comes to Beatrix Trevelyan." And with those words he bowed, then turned and left the room, shutting the door carefully behind him.
…
When Beatrix and her group arrived in Haven, she dismounted and headed straight to the War table room, gathering the rest of her companions with a wooden smile on her face. Varric fell into step beside her, and the Seeker was walking directly behind them. The dwarf smiled up at Beatrix when she glanced at him, but she did not return the smile; the look she gave him was old and sad. The rest followed them quietly while Varric wondered what was wrong – what in Thedas could have happened to Beatrix to make her look this way.
The two hundred mages she had allied with were due to arrive sometime in the late afternoon and she had to make sure everything and everyone was ready for them. Pausing only at the Requisition table to ask if there were enough tents, she discovered quickly there were only fifty-five available. They were large ones though, so she nodded and asked the quartermaster to have them pitched on the grounds outside the village proper.
A few moments later she pushed open the heavy doors that led into the Chantry, and got hold of a messenger boy who was speaking to Mother Giselle. The boy nodded as he sprinted to get the Ambassador, running off to look for the Commander immediately afterwards, and leaving Josephine's door open. Josephine stood up from her desk and hurried outside, giving Leliana a brief hug before she turned to Beatrix, looking at her with concern in her eyes.
"My Lady Herald," Josephine said, her voice nearly a whisper. "There is something you must know before we start the meeting –"
At that moment, the door to the war table room was flung open by none other than Commander Cullen, who stood in the threshold for a few moments, a scowl on his face.
"You!" he yelled, marching up to Beatrix, who was looking at the floor. "How could you do this? Do you not know the danger this puts all of us in?"
Beatrix did not move, but when she spoke, her voice was soft. "The mages have never been given a chance to prove themselves."
"The mages are vulnerable while the Breach remains! They could turn into abominations, slaying innocent people! Is this what you want? You are the most IRRESPOSIBLE and RECKLESS person I have ever known!" Cullen shouted, his voice booming throughout the Chantry.
It was then that Beatrix raised her head, her eyes shining with unshed tears. "Is this what you really think?" she asked, her voice quavering.
"Yes!" Cullen thundered, his stormy eyes gazing into her tearful ones.
Beatrix nodded, then turned, running out of the Chantry – disappearing into stealth a moment later.
Everyone in the room turned to look at Cullen, who was still breathing heavily, his eyes shooting daggers. He flung his hands up into the air in desperation and he walked away, leaving everyone standing there in stunned silence.
"Well," Varric said after a few moments, scratching his chin thoughtfully. "who wants to start the search for the Herald?"
…
It was Cassandra who found her, crying quietly on a boulder in the woods that surrounded the village. She made noise when she approached, so as not to startle her, and sat down beside her with a sigh.
"Beatrix," she said in a low voice, putting an arm around her.
"Please, Cassandra," Beatrix sobbed on her shoulder. "Don't ask me to return. Don't ask me to face him!"
"Shhh," the Seeker said as she stroked her hair. "Nobody will ask you to do anything."
"I can't," came Beatrix's strangled reply. "I can't face him. Not after what I saw, not after what he said."
"Perhaps it is better if you tell me," Cassandra murmured. "Sometimes talking helps."
Beatrix nodded sitting up, her sobs still coming as she started to speak. Casandra held her hand as she listened, her expression changing to a horrified one when Beatrix reached the part about Cullen. Then, Beatrix stopped talking as fresh tears started rolling down her cheeks. At that moment, Cassandra promised herself that she would talk to Cullen.
Maybe not exactly talk, since she was angry. Very angry. But she would certainly let him know what was going on.
"Do you think you can walk to your cabin?" Cassandra asked, as she pulled a strand of Beatrix's hair behind her ear. "How about a bath?"
Beatrix nodded, not trusting herself to speak. They walked slowly back, passing the training area along the way.
The Commander was nowhere to be seen.
…
When Cassandra tucked Beatrix in, after their bath and a simple beef stew, she blew out the candle and stayed in the darkened room for a few moments, trying to clear her head. They had the mages, but she knew Beatrix needed some time before she could close the Breach.
There was a soft knock on the door and Cassandra rose to answer it quickly, not wanting a second knock to disturb the Herald's rest.
Cullen stood on the other side, his eyes swollen, a stricken look on his face.
Cassandra shook her head, and put a finger to her lips, gesturing that he must be quiet. He nodded once, his lips pursed as he was led down the path by the Seeker, outside the gates and directly to his cabin in the woods, passing through a number of mages' tents along the way.
Once they reached his cabin, Cullen shut the door behind him and leaned back against it.
"You are in a lot of trouble, Commander," Cassandra said, her voice laden with anger. "Where is your self-control? That self-control that makes you the Commanding force of the Inquisition?"
Cullen sighed deeply, rubbing his face with a gloved hand, then letting it fall beside him.
"How is she?" he asked, looking at the wooden floor of his cabin.
"Not well. Do you know what horrors she faced at the Castle? You did not even think to ask. All you cared about was your anger, your discomfort."
"You know very well that having the mages here is not good with the Breach still open!" Cullen replied defensively, but Cassandra held up her hand, and Cullen stopped talking.
"I know this. I do not agree with her decision. But I won't scream the things you screamed at her, because I understand why she did it," came Cassandra's reply.
"Well, you'll have to explain it to me, because I don't understand why she did this at all!" Cullen shot back at her with a deep sigh, sitting on his bed.
"Were you not there when she told us about her aunt, Commander?" Cassandra asked, sitting on a chair across from him.
Cullen's reply was to groan and put his hands over his face, rubbing it furiously.
"I agree that the mages should be watched, but I did not know there were templars here," Cassandra continued. "That will certainly make our task a lot easier. But enough about the mages. Let us talk about Beatrix instead. You have effectively made her feel guilty about herself. Made her feel unworthy as well."
Cullen looked up, his startled gaze fixing on her face. "What?" he managed to say.
"While we were all in Redcliffe, the Magister sent her and Dorian a year ahead in time. I do not remember any of this, because I was left behind. Only for a few moments though. She appeared again not five minutes later and demanded Alexius hand over the castle and had him arrested. This was before the Queen of Ferelden showed up, asking Fiona to take her mages and leave the castle. Both Beatrix and Dorian are the only ones who remember that future, because they were the only ones that were sent into it."
"Dorian," Cullen spat out, the scowl on his face making Cassandra smile briefly.
"She found you Commander, or what was left of you in the courtyard of the castle. Your flesh long gone, recognizable only by your fur-mantled cloak and blond hair. She said that she had never screamed or cried so much in her entire life. Aside from that, we all were infected by Red Lyrium in this terrible future. Leliana resisted the infection and the Taint – Beatrix said Alexius was experimenting on her. She mentioned that the Spymaster was unrecognizable. She fought hard to return to the present. We only saw her gone for five minutes at the most."
Cullen shuddered, shaking his head. "I didn't know," he murmured.
"We cannot second-guess ourselves. We need to support the Herald's decision. How will we fight united if we are not united at all?" Cassandra commented wisely.
"I must speak to her," Cullen said, the remorse in his voice evident. "I must beg her to forgive me. I – I just couldn't control my anger. I felt like she had betrayed me."
"She is very broken. Perhaps you should let some time pass. We must focus on her getting better in order to close the Breach," Cassandra said, rising to her feet. "I must go. Good night, Cullen."
As soon as the door closed behind the Seeker, Cullen felt the tears start.
He did nothing to stop them.
…