Chapter 11

The Ball Game

"Well, well, well, what have we got here? Looks like you fourth grade wussys actually kept your word."

"Wolfgang, just shut up and play."

"Nobody tells me to shut up, got it, football face?"

"Okay, okay, sure. Let's just get this game going."

"Whatever."

"Okay, listen up!" Helga called, taking charge of the team, as always when it came to sports. "Sid, you cover first, Sheena you cover second, Tall Hair Boy on third, Curly, Harold, Lila, and Nadine go outfield, Stinky, Football Head, Brainy, and Rhonda cover infield."

"Are you insane?!" Rhonda exclaimed. "I'm not going out there! Do you see all that mud? The field looks like a swamp! I'll completely ruin my exclusive, one of a kind, vintage outfit! Do you realize that it cost three hundred and fifty dollars?!"

"Whoopdeedo. Don't blame me. Arnold's the one who got us into this mess in the first place."

"Arnold, remind me to kill you."
"Um…I'll do that."

"Are you guys playing or not?" Wolfgang shouted.

"Phoebe, you're score keeper. Okay, break."

"Hey, Helga, what are you doing?"

"What do you think, Arnoldo, I'm catcher! Doi!"

"Hey, what about our team?" Wolfgang shouted. "We don't have any extra people to be catcher!"

"Fine, then I'll be catcher for both teams," Helga replied. "Happy?"

"How do I know you won't cheat?"

"Look, if you just want to forfeit now and declare us the winner, you can go right ahead."

"Oh, whatever," Wolfgang reluctantly agreed.

"Okay, we're up first. Stinky, get over here!"

"Okeydokey."

Some fifth grader pitched the ball, and it went right over Stinky's head before he even saw it.

"Strike one!" Another pitch. Another miss. "Strike two! This is so pathetic. Strike three! You're out!"

"How can I be out? He never even pitched the dang ball!"

"Stinky, he pitched it three times," Helga said.

"Awe. This really bites."

After that, the fifth graders struck out Harold. Next it was Lila's turn up to bat.

"I'm just ever so sure that baseball is my all time favorite sport!"

"Oh, really? Well maybe you should 'ever so' keep your eye on the ball if you don't want to strike out," Helga taunted, as she tossed the ball back to the pitcher. "Strike one!"

"What? But that's not possible! I'm ever so sure that I'm supposed to be ever so perfect at just about everything I do."

"Fascinating. Strike two!" Helga cried, enjoying every minute of Lila's humiliation.

"That's it. This has gone far enough!"

"Strike three! You're out! So go, Little Miss Perfect!"

"That's the last straw! Hey, you!"

"Who, me?"

"That's right!" Lila shouted, marching across the field to where Wolfgang stood, on the pitchers mound. "What do you think you're doing?! Don't you realize what you've done?!"

"Uh…struck you out?"

"Exactly! You struck me out!"

"Uh…so?"

"So?! So, you can't do that to me! I'm perfect! And now, you're gonna pay."

"Whatever," he muttered, shoving her face down in the mud.

"Hey, Arnold! You see what just happened to Lila?" Gerald said.

"Huh? No, what?"

"Oh, brother. You're so in love with the girl that you don't even notice when she gets thrown in the mud?"

"She did? Why didn't you tell me, Gerald?"

"I just did."

"Oh, yeah. Well, it looks like she's okay," he said, watching her stand up and run away.

"Are you feeling okay, man? The love of your life just got completely nailed, and you don't even care! I thought you'd jump up and run to help her, but you didn't even notice!"

"Well…what could I do against Wolfgang? Besides, she's okay. I just…had my mind on the game is all."

"Whatever you say, Arnold. Whatever you say."

"Yo, Arnold! Get over here! We need another player!" Helga shouted across the field to him.

"Coming!" he called back to her.

"Listen, Arnold, you need to make this hit! We're down by four points!" Helga whispered from behind him.

"I'll do the best I can, but he seems to be pretty unbeatable."

"Come on, Arnold! You can do it! You're always saying junk like that, so why not put it to some good use?"

"I'll try."

"Well, well, well, if it isn't the football face up to bat. I've knocked out three of your little classmates, and I guess you'll be my next victim."

"Just throw the ball Wolfgang," he said through clenched teeth.

Wolfgang fired the pitch, and it flew past Arnold.

"Strike, ow!" Helga cried, as she caught the ball. "Criminy, that guy throws hard!"

"Are you okay?" Arnold asked, with a hint of concern in his voice, as he turned to her.

"I'm fine. Strike two! Arnold, forget me, keep your eye on the ball!"

"Oh, right. Sorry."

"Arnold! Swing!" she cried.

He turned around and saw the ball heading right at him. He swung with all his might, and his bat collided with the ball.

"RUN!"

He tour around first, second, third base.

"Where's the ball?" Wolfgang shouted.

"I don't know! It landed in the mud somewhere!"

"Well, find it!"

"Home run!" Helga shouted. All the fourth graders cheered. "Keep going, Arnold!" she whispered to herself

First base.

"I found it Wolfgang!"

"Well, what are you waiting for, get it!"

Second base.

The fifth grader threw it to another player.

Third base.

"Arnold! Go Arnold!" all the fourth graders shouted.

"HOME RUN!" Helga cried.

"Wolfgang! Catch!" the fifth grader called, throwing the mud covered ball to him.

"About time, you pathetic losers!"

Arnold stopped on home plate, gasping for breath.

"Arnold, you did it!" Helga cried. "That was…amazing!"

"Thanks," he panted.

"The new score is fifth graders four, fourth graders two."