Chapter 17

Arnold's Dream

Arnold walked down the long hallway, past all the border's rooms, and up a tall staircase at the end of the hallway to his room. He stepped inside and shut the door.

"Grandpa sure knows how to make a crazy story," he said out loud. "Like some girl really locked him in a warehouse to prevent him from moving to Nebraska. How gullible does he think I am?" he said, as he climbed into bed.

"He just likes to tease me. There's no way anything could ever happen between Helga and me," he whispered, as he drifted off to sleep.

"What? Where am I?" Arnold cried, looking around.

He was in a long room with seats on either side. It kind of looked like a plane.

"Hey, man! You're up!"

"Gerald? Gerald, where are we?"

"What do you mean, 'where are we?' We're on a train, remember?"

"A train? Why? Where are we going?"

"To Nebraska, of course!"

"Nebraska? Why on earth are we going to Nebraska?"

"Because you have no future back in the city. We're going to Nebraska to start a new life!"

"A new life? But I don't want a new life! I don't want to move! I've got to get back home! I've got to get back to Helga!"

"Helga?"

"Yeah!"

"Helga G. Pataki?"

"Yeah! Gerald, you have to help me get back! Come on, help me stop the train!"

He ran towards the door, but Gerald stepped in front of his path.

"Gerald, what are you doing? Get out of my way!"

"Arnold, you can't go back! You have to stay with me! You have to go to Nebraska to start a new life!"

"No! I'm not starting a new life in Nebraska! I'm going back to the city! I'm going back to Helga! Will you help me or not?"

"Arnold, listen! You have to go! You have to!"

"No! I won't! And you can't make me!" Arnold shouted, trying to shove Gerald aside. "I won't let you keep me from Helga!"

"I hoped I wouldn't have to resort to this," Gerald said slowly, shaking his head, "but it appears I have no choice."

He suddenly stepped aside of the door and pulled it open. He lunged forward, grabbed Arnold's arm, and pushed him through the door.

"Goodbye, man!" he called into the darkness.

Arnold was falling, falling through the inky blackness that surrounded him. He was beginning to get the feeling that he would be falling forever, when suddenly he hit a hard stone floor.

"Ow!" he cried.

He stood up and looked around. All around him was pitch darkness. He couldn't see a thing. He knew absolutely nothing of his surroundings, except that it had a cold, damp, stone floor.

"Where am I?" he whispered.

"Am I? Am I?" his voice echoed.

Suddenly, he thought he heard a sound. It was quiet and muffled and seemed to be come from far away. It sounded a little like someone crying.

"Hello?" he called. "Is someone there?"

"Arnold?" he heard a voice gasp, sounding a little closer. "Arnold! Is that you?"

"Yeah! It's me! Where are you?"

"I don't know! Arnold, I'm so scared! You have to help me!"

"Don't worry!" he called. "Just keep talking! I'll find you!"
"Hurry, Arnold! Hurry! She's coming!"

"Who's coming?"

"She is! Hurry! You have to find me!"

"I'm coming!" he shouted, running through the dark chamber.

The voice seemed to be getting closer. He was almost there. All of a sudden he crashed into someone and fell backwards onto the floor.

"Arnold?"
"Yeah, yeah it's me."

"Where are you?"

"Hold out your hand so I can find you."

He felt around in the darkness until he grasped an arm.

"Oh, Arnold!" the person cried, collapsing into his arms. "Arnold, just hold me. And never let go!" The person suddenly threw both of their arms around his neck and hugged tightly. "Just hold me," the person repeated.

"Don't worry," Arnold said, hugging the person back. "Everything's going to be okay."

He didn't know who on earth this stranger was, but whoever they were, they were obviously very frightened, and he wanted to help them.

Without warning, the floor started to shake. A loud thundering noise seemed to fall all around them.

"Oh, no!" the person screamed. "She's found us!"

"Who? What's going on?"

They saw a faint red glow coming from a distant corner of the room. They watched as it got bigger and bigger until the entire room was lit up with red light.

"HELGA?" Arnold exclaimed, realizing who the person was. He quickly stood up. He watched as she slowly stood up too. "Helga? What are you doing here?"

"I was waiting for you," she said softly, staring at the floor.

"Waiting for me? Why?"

"I was scared."

"Scared of what?"

"Of her. Oh, Arnold, it was wicked and selfish of me to lead you here. Now we will both be under her terrible wrath. I'm so sorry!" She began to cry again.

"No, don't cry!" he said. "Please don't cry." When she failed to obey him, he took hold of her both her shoulders and pulled her towards him, forcing her to look at him. "Listen!" he exclaimed, shaking her slightly. "I'm not mad at you! Don't cry! I don't know where we are, or why, but-"

"Get away from her."

Helga flinched.
"Who was that?" Arnold asked.

"Her."

Arnold looked around and noticed something he hadn't before. In the far corner of the room was a shadowy figure.

"Get away from her," the figure repeated, stepping into the light.

"Lila?"

"Not just Lila. I am now Lila, Mistress of Evil. Now get away from her!"

"Lila?" Arnold said, letting go of Helga and taking a step towards Lila. "What are you doing here?"

"I should be asking you the same question. Why are you in my dungeon?"

"I have to save Helga."

"Helga, Helga, Helga, is that all you ever think about?"

"No, but she's in trouble! I have to save her! What have you done with her anyway? Why have you brought her here?"

"To keep her away," Lila explained. "With her locked in here forever she will never interfere with us again! Oh, Arnold, we can finally be together!"

"Why would I want to be with you?"

"Because you love me."

"Says who?"

"Says me."

"Since when were you in charge of who I loved?"

"Since I felt like it."

"Well, you're not. I don't love you."

"What are you talking about? Of course you love me. Everyone loves me! I'm perfect!"

"You're right. You are perfect. You're too perfect."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I mean that no one could possibly be that perfect. It's impossible. You're not really perfect. You're just acting perfect to get attention. Besides, you just said that you were the ruler of evil of something."

"You know what Arnold? You're right. I am evil. I'm evil, and I'm proud of it!"

"Why?"

"None of your business. The point is, I am. I am the Mistress of the greatest organization to ever be established. E.V.I.L. That stands for Every Villain Is Lemons."

"Every villain is lemons?"

"Yes! Lemons! Mwahahahah- sorry. I'll stop. We're getting off subject. The point is, with Helga gone, we will have nothing stopping us from ruling the world! Come, Arnold, and we will rule the universe as husband and wife!"

"Lila, you're not talking sense! I can't marry you! We're nine! And besides, I don't love you! Do you not get that? I DON'T LOVE YOU!"

"Why?"

"Because you're a phony little nobody, who thinks they can lock people up in the dark for pleasure! I mean, what did Helga ever do to you anyway?"

"She stole you from me," Lila whispered.

"Excuse me?"

"She stole you from me! I would have had you all to myself if it weren't for her! She's destroying everything! She'll ruin my beautiful scheme!"

"She didn't destroy anything! You're just jealous is all!"

"Jealous of what?"

"I don't know-"

"The fact that you love her and not me?"

"I WHAT?"

"You love her and not me!"

"I never said I loved her! I just said that I had to save her!"

"Arnold, it's either her or me. Make your choice."

"Well, if I had to choose, I'd choose her, of course!"

"No, you wouldn't."

"Yes, I would!"

"No, you wouldn't."

"Yes, I would!"

"Prove it."

"Prove it? How am I supposed to prove it?"

"You can't. Because you wouldn't choose her."

"Yes, I would! I'd choose anyone but you! And I will prove it! Just tell me what I have to do."

Lila stopped and thought for a moment. Then she started to smile a cold, cruel smile.

"Kiss her."

"What?"

"Kiss her! If you really would choose her, then you would."

"But-"

"Or maybe you need some persuading," she said, pulling out a sharp dagger.

"You're mad," Arnold said, slowly walking backwards towards Helga, who stifled a gasp.

"Yes, thank you."

"What do you plan to do with that knife?"

"If you do or don't kiss her?"

"Um…both."

"If you don't…let's just say I've been practicing my dart throwing. If you do I won't run you through. Any questions?"

"Have you ever seen a psychologist? Cause I think you need one."

"Kiss her!" Lila screamed, holding the knife up.

"We're gonna die, we're gonna die, we're gonna die," Helga chanted over and over.

"No! We're not! She can't do this! It's…it's murder!"

"She won't care. She won't get caught. No one will ever find us here. No one will ever know. Even if they did, everyone's too nuts about her to do anything about it. I'm the only one who's ever realized what she's really like. That's why she imprisoned me here."

"No…she said she trapped you here because she thought you were stealing me from her or something. I don't know why she thought that. I'd never love someone like her anyway."

"I'm waiting!" Lila exclaimed impatiently.

"Look, can't we just talk this over?" Arnold asked her desperately.

"No. I'd hurry up if I were you. I haven't got all day."

"What are we going to do?" Arnold whispered, turning to face Helga.

"I…well, I-I mean…um…"

"Is there any way out?"

"No. I've searched the whole place. There's nothing. We're trapped."

"I'm counting to five, and then I'm throwing the first knife."

"First?" Arnold asked in disbelief.

"I've got plenty. One…two…three, four, five. Time's up!" she exclaimed, as she hurled the knife straight at Helga.

"Helga! Look out!" Arnold cried, grabbing Helga and throwing her against him, so that the knife just grazed her arm.

She closed her eyes from the pain but didn't cry out. He looked at the thin line of blood on her arm and felt himself burn with anger, just like he had that afternoon. And suddenly, he knew what he had to do.

He pulled Helga back an inch or two and looked at her.

"She's actually kind of pretty," he thought to himself, as he nervously smiled.

"What?" Helga asked, wondering why he was smiling.

"Um…just hold still, okay?"

"What are you talking abo-"

She was suddenly cut off as Arnold pulled her forward and gently pressed his lips to hers. He only kissed her for about two seconds before pulling back. As soon as he did he sort of wished that he hadn't. He had never done anything like that before, but it was amazing. Kind of weird but amazing.

Helga just stared at him, her face a mixture of surprise, wonder, and happiness. Actually, she mostly looked dizzy and confused.

"What, I, um, wait, what-"

"Sorry, Helga. I had to do it."

"Sorry? Arnold, don't you get it? I love you! I absolutely adore you! That was the best thing that ever happened to me in my whole life!"

"Really?" he asked, smiling shyly.

"HOW DARE YOU! HOW DARE YOU!" Lila shrieked. "HOW DARE YOU CHOOSE HER OVER ME! HOW DARE YOU!"

Rapidly, she picked up a handful of knives and hurled them straight at the two of them. There was no escape.

"Helga, I love you too!" he heard himself saying. "I love you!"

"Oh, Arnold, I love you," Helga cried, hugging him with all her might. "I love y-"

HEY ARNOLD! HEY ARNOLD! HEY ARNOLD! HEY-

Arnold leaned over and shut off his alarm clock.

"Wow. What a night. What a dream! Grandpa and his stupid stories must have gotten to me," he thought, as he sat up in bed. "Good thing it was only a crazy dream."