CHAPTER 6

(DAY 2)

Clarke's POV

On my way to the my mom's ward in Polis, I started to think. Did Lexa's spirit enter Alicia's body yet? I mean, this is the second day that Alicia's has been in this year. Shouldn't it have happened already. I braced myself as I opened the doors to the ward. I spotted Madison and Alicia both talking to different patients and getting their history and current mental status. While my mom just tended to the injured people. I could tell the transfer had not happened, because Lexa would not have been wearing a skin tight tank top and shorts that short. Alicia just looked so normal. As flattering and how much skin she showed it didn't really faze me. Lexa's arms were toner and nicely sized muscles and Alicia didn't. I don't know. There's also something about being the only person that saw so much of Lexa's skin that excited me. Lexa's clothes were almost like her walls. When she had on her warrior clothes she was the formal and great Heda that people admired and feared. When she took her clothes off, and it was just me and her, she was just a girl. It was like she hid everything from everyone and let me only in. With my realization, I felt the gratefulness I felt for Lexa. She trusted me enough to be vulnerable and let down her walls. She always made me feel special.

What did remind me of Lexa was that today Alicia was wearing her hair partially up. Her face looked almost exactly like Lexa's. I had to remind myself every so often to check myself and tell myself she wasn't her. That was hard too though. I mean knowing now that Lexa and I were brought together in a union and we were married, the feeling is unexplainable. How do you look at someone that reminds you of someone you love. How do you look that someone knowing that you now know that you were married to the person they appear to be. How do you stop yourself from feeling the excitement to tell that person that we were married. You just remind yourself every second of every day that she's not her and you move on. That's how.

Our eyes met and for a second it felt like Lexa was looking at me, but there was not the longing and intense loving gaze that I craved and was so use to. There was only admiration in those eyes. I guess she wasn't mad at me for being so rude to her yesterday. I should still apologize. That would be a conversation starter and I could see if she's thinking about staying in Polis. I waited until she was done with her patient.

"Alicia could we possibly talk in private?" I asked. She nodded without giving away any emotions. We found a quiet space in the clinic to sit.

"Hi." I started off. She raised her eyebrow.

"Are you planning on staying in Polis?" I asked.

"I don't know. I don't plan on it." She put it simply. Oh no. I can't let her leave. I need her to be here with me so Lexa can come back to me. I don't Alicia to be harmed by Lexa's enemies thinking Alicia is Lexa. Alicia and her family wouldn't stand a chance against the clans.

"Why? You'd be able to have a place to sleep and eat. We'd help you adjust to 2150." I said.

"I just don't think it's a good fit. I know how against it you were yesterday just by you're tone," Alicia told me. Stupid me. I should float myself for my attitude yesterday. I need her to stay. I took a second and sighed. I decided to go with the truth. Well part of the truth anyways.

"Look I wanted to say I'm sorry about yesterday. I was just flustered. I thought you were someone I knew. She passed away recently. You look exactly like her. When I found out you weren't her. I kind of just freaked out and put my walls up again because I was made vulnerable when I first saw you." I said. She wouldn't look me in the eyes.

"Did you love her?" she asked me while moving her hair around probably trying to hide how shy she was for asking this question.

"Yes, I do love her." I said.

"Do you have a picture of her?" Alicia asked. Picture?

"What's a picture?" I asked.

"You know a camera takes pictures." Alicia said.

"No. I do have a few drawings I did of her. Let's just say, if you stay in Polis with your family I'll show you another time. Would you like that?" I asked.

"Sure. I'd like that. Thanks Clarke. Oh, would you mind telling me about her?" Alicia asked me. I smiled.

"That's a story for another time, Alicia. Now let's get back to work." I said. We spent the day helping the victims of Alie's destruction. There were no fights, no yelling, no deaths, no tension, and no wars. Life was good in Polis; it was just missing Lexa.

Alicia's POV

The chat with Clarke calmed me but it also made me feel a little awkward. Now I know Clarke's not a bad person, but now I also know she's in love with someone else. This someone else looks exactly like me. That's literally such a big coincidence. What are the odds. Just when I was starting to have good like-feelings towards her. Hmm... Maybe it's not meant to be.

When I went to sleep, I dreamed another dream. Clarke was in this dream too. We were running from this giant monkey. Clarke was running ahead of me when I fell. The monkey got to me and started dragging me. I told Clarke to leave me but she didn't. She fought the monkey until I was free. She brought me to safety as I limped on one leg. She saved me. I woke up to darkness after that. Damn... I was having some weird ass fantasies of this girl.