A/N: This chapter brings a couple of things to 'In Your Light.' The first is an update on Killian and his progress with his lingering PTSD, which I think is still an important part of this story for sure. Don't worry though, things are good, and we're still firmly in fluff territory. Then the second part tracks another date for Emma and Killian and because I haven't written many of them, it's a movie date. I hope you all enjoy and thanks for reading!
As Emma had lamented over a week ago, the wedding and all it's festivities truly were upon them. He'd just dropped Emma off at Elsa's for the wedding shower, promising to be back in a few hours to see her home again, and in the process he'd been instructed – or rather condemned – to Liam-watch. Elsa pleaded with Killian to see his brother through a few hours away, and he couldn't deny her, especially when Emma mouthed her own 'please' behind her sister's back.
"Rather sad that you couldn't secure your own plans for the day, Liam." Liam scoffed, slinging his arm around Killian's shoulder.
"Not to worry little brother, I've a few tricks up my sleeve yet." The 'tricks', it seemed, were a stroll through Storybrooke, stopping at Granny's for a bit to eat and talking at length with each and every person who asked about the upcoming nuptials.
Despite the rather time consuming nature of these social stops, Killian delighted in seeing his brother this way. Elsa truly made him happy, and Killian could think of no other man as worthy as Liam to be given such a gift. His brother had been Killian's protector and his guide all through their youth, always taking on responsibilities no young man should have to face in order to care for Killian. With their deadbeat father, and their mother gone too soon, most people might have crumbled under the pressure, but not Liam. He'd persevered and given Killian the strength to do so as well. It was good to see Liam then get a bit of reprieve in the form of love, and Elsa was a fine woman, who was herself a devoted sister and a natural caretaker. To put it mildly, they made a favorable match.
When all the socializing came to an end though, Liam headed towards the park, remarking that this had been his plan all along, to meet up with Kristoff and the kids for the rest of the afternoon. Killian hadn't been to this playground much since his first arrival in town, but the scene it made for looked almost entirely the same, except for one critical piece – Emma wasn't there. His slight sadness from that fact though, was quickly made up for by the excitement of Emma's niece and nephew.
"Uncle Liam! Uncle Killian!" Killian smiled at the endearment the children had bestowed upon him. It gave him a sense of warmth to be an uncle (even if technically he was not related to them yet), as if somehow he mattered more than the common person.
He'd always loved children, and though there was a time not too long ago that he believed it unlikely he should ever have his own, meeting Emma changed that. Part of him felt it was foolish to be planning for such big things with a woman who'd only recently become his girlfriend, but there was no rationalizing through what he felt, and instead he chose to follow his gut over analyzing this to death.
Instinct had gotten him this far, had seen him through war and strife, through the pain of losing his mother as a boy and of losing friends along the way as well, and his instincts were resolutely on the side of Emma being right for him. Killian didn't need time to know she was the only woman who would ever make him feel this way, but he did need to wait to be sure she was on the same page before he ran around making such declarations. Shaking away the internal considerations, he greeted the children.
"Captains. What adventure do we have in store today?"
"I'm showing Billy Brannigan that I can do the whole monkey bars! He said girls can't do all ten but he's wrong!" Lena said, reminding him a lot of Emma in moments when she was determined to prove herself. A somehow endearing competitiveness was a trait this little girl certainly shared with her aunt.
"And Captain Garrett, does the caterpillar watch continue?" The boy's whole face lit up as he nodded.
"Hannah's Dad gave us a whole terrantium for them." From behind Garrett, Killian heard Kristoff clarify.
"It's terrarium son." Garrett parroted the word back correctly before spotting his fellow bug enthusiast across the way and racing off. That then gave young Lena leave to do the same.
"What am I, chopped liver?" Liam huffed when they were both gone, and though Killian recognized the words were meant in jest, he also knew his brother loved these kids as if they were his own.
"Your brother's just the shiny new toy, man." Killian winced a bit at the categorization, but Liam agreed with Kristoff.
"Not just with them. The whole bloody town's taken with him, for what reason I'll never know." Killian smirked, acknowledging the truth in the statement. Killian at first posed a mystery to the people of Storybrooke, but over the past few weeks he'd evolved into an honorary local. He would wager most of that came from his connection to Emma, but it meant that wherever he went he was greeted as a favorite neighbor despite his being so new to the area.
"Green is an interesting shade on you, brother." Liam laughed at that, acquiescing, and replying that in the end he was just glad Killian decided to stay at all.
As they watched the kids playing, Kristoff, Liam, and Killian filled the time talking shop, with Killian learning a bit more about Kristoff's environmental research for a local university. Killian meanwhile kept them apprised of how well things were going working with Dave while Liam noted that soon school would be out for the summer. One more week and he'd be free, while Killian faced the busiest season of his new-found professional year. He didn't mind though, for the work was rewarding and there was no doubt in his mind that he'd find or make the time to still see Emma, which was all he really wanted.
Eventually the easy going small talk faded though, and seemingly out of nowhere Kristoff posed a line of questioning that would shake the calmer nature of their whole discussion.
"So Anna told me you came by a few weeks ago, to talk about what happened." Killian tensed a bit at the mention of his meeting with Emma's sister, but with a few even breaths, and a gentle touch of Emma's compass still residing in his pocket, he managed to relax some. Kristoff was Anna's husband and so it made sense that she would mention it, but where Killian tried to be understanding, Liam remained on the defensive for him.
"I see you're blunt as ever, Kristoff. Forgive him brother, he does better with animals than people." Killian shook his head and waved it off like it wasn't a big deal but it was, and his brother understood that. Liam knew how it felt to try and find one's bearings after a life in active duty, having been through something similar a few years ago. Killian and Liam hadn't spoken much about particulars, but recently there'd been more talk between the brothers, and things thankfully were beginning to return to how they had once been between them. Kristoff though only knew what Anna had told him, which Killian was betting wasn't much since he'd felt the need to ask now.
A few days after their first meeting and the incident at the dinner party, Killian went to see Anna personally. Emma mentioned to him during their talk that night that Anna was a grief counselor, but he'd actually gone to her merely to apologize. He didn't want her to think that Garrett or Lena had been in danger from his actions, and insisted that if she was more comfortable he could keep his distance. She'd asserted that there was no fear or worry on her side, but that he didn't have to go it alone. Anna gave him a whole list of people trained to help with things like this in the area, and she mentioned that her and her sisters had found they needed a similar kind of counseling when they first came to Storybrooke. Killian was grateful, and when he was honest with himself later, he admitted that on some level he'd hoped for such assistance when going to see her.
"Yeah. Seemed like the best thing to do considering everything that was going on." Killian certainly had more than enough to talk about with a specialist. Between his past haunting him in the present and the surging emotions he was wading through with Emma, he'd needed some sense of guidance, and luckily found it.
"How's that going by the way?" By 'that' Killian assumed Kristoff meant dealing with the remnants of his trauma since leaving the service. It felt a very personal thing to answer, but if Killian had learned anything since moving to Storybrooke, it was that some people kept poking until they found the truth. That it was done from a place of caring helped, but still it went against Killian's own habits profoundly.
"I've been seeing Doc Hopper a couple times a week. Progress is good, but there's no overnight cure." That was true enough. Whatever strides he took within the four walls of that office might be good investments, but it was all still what he made it, and sometimes the mind needed more time to adjust. He still startled at sirens and loud clanging, but the jumping into full blown fight responses had eased away, and he'd learned how to get a handle on the flooding of anxiety that came in those moments. Emma's presence made the episodes fade away far faster than when he was alone, but even when he didn't have her by his side he was improving.
Kristoff nodded, essentially dropping the conversation, and Killian wondered again about how different this man was from most of his other friends. Dave for one was patient, out waiting any sort of tension or problem, until the person in question came to him. Killian had revealed some of his past and his present because of that and because of David's own experience as a marine in the past. Killian never felt forced to say anything, but knew that Dave was a good sounding board for some lingering problems. Liam was similar in his attempts to be there, asking more guarded yes and no questions designed to see if Killian was okay as opposed to finding out the gritty details. Graham never brought it up at all, which suited Killian just fine, but Kristoff went for the heart of the matter one second and then walked away, as if unbridled by social convention. Maybe Liam was right –he was just a bit more animalistic than the rest of them.
Thankfully the children returned in that moment, hell bent on starting a battle between their uncles, which Killian welcomed. The excitement of the kids and their obliviousness to anything being different about Killian at all let the moment pass, and a few hours later, after some exhausting shows of strength and smarts and speed between himself and Liam for the amusement of Garrett and Lena, Killian knew it was time to head back. He'd received his text from Emma, and could hardly wait to see her once more. Liam decided to wait a bit longer, for his presence would essentially decree an end to all festivities, while Killian's would just signal Emma's departure.
On the way back to Elsa and Liam's, Killian popped into the flower shop only briefly to secure a little something for his Swan, just to show that he'd been thinking of her. Bounding up the steps to Liam and Elsa's, he nearly stumbled when the front door flew open. Ruby looked at him with relief in her features.
"Oh good, you're here. Emma won't participate in the final game, so you'll have to be her inducement." This was not a part of the plan, but Ruby dragged him into the house. He tried his best to hide the flowers behind his back, knowing that if everyone saw them it would become a moment of everyone hemming hawing about how cute they were, and he didn't want to embarrass Emma at all.
"Elsa, I love you but this is like five steps too far." Elsa's laugh could be heard through the hallway from where they must be in the living room. Killian had heard it enough times to know that this particular tone meant Emma's sister was a little buzzed at least.
"Emma, it's just for fun. You remember fun don't you?" Killian heard Emma reply in a barely restrained tone. She was clearly more sober, but definitely less comfortable.
"Writing sex advice for you and Liam's honeymoon is not exactly my idea of fun, Els."
What the hell? Killian thought to himself as Ruby chuckled.
"You're not going to be much help convincing her are you?" Killian shook his head as Elsa spoke again.
"Just think about you and Killian and write something down!"
"That's what this is – isn't it? A scam so you can all find out what my sex life is like?!" Killian reached the doorway and could see Emma, blushing furiously and looking lovely even if she was a bit shaken.
"That appears to be the case, love." She swung her head around to look at him and relief washed over her. Emma grabbed her purse and sweater and made her way over to Killian as Elsa pouted.
"Dang-it, we were so close!" Emma rolled her eyes, but smiled all the same as Killian nodded to the remaining women.
"Ladies, if you'll excuse us." He discretely shifted the flowers so that no one saw, but just before presenting them to Emma when they were once again outside, she spoke.
"You're my hero right now, I mean it." He grinned at her flattery.
"Is that right love?" Emma nodded, noticing the flowers and giving him her own happy smile in return. Without hesitation, she stepped up to kiss him and then took his hand in hers, walking back in the direction of her house.
"Sorry you had to hear that. I love my sisters and my friends, but sometimes, they really just don't understand the meaning of privacy." Killian nodded his understanding. He'd been dealing with a similar issue earlier this afternoon.
"Any reason in particular that you haven't said anything?" Killian tried to push away the trickling of doubt in the back of his mind that said maybe Emma wasn't as interested in that part of a relationship as he was.
"Aside from the fact that we haven't… you know." Killian did know, for nearly every second of every day he thought about when it would finally happen and how good it would be.
The only reason they hadn't taken things to that most intimate level, was that he wanted things to be absolutely right, and he wanted Emma to finally have a perfect moment. He knew a little of her past with other men, and it tore him up how cavalier and lacking in basic kindness it had been. She deserved everything, and Killian was trying to give it to her even if it was driving him insane in the process. That wasn't to say he hadn't been keeping her satisfied though, so he wondered where this instinct for quiet was coming from. She finally explained, soothing his worry in the process.
"I just like that what we have belongs to us. For the first time, I feel like I'm a part of something real, and I don't feel like jinxing it or taking it for granted. It feels safe kept between the two of us, you know?" Killian nodded, accepting that for Emma, this thing between them was a risk and something outside of her comfort zone. Both of them were learning to trust and to try in the name of love.
And that was what this was, at least to Killian. He'd even confessed as much this week when he'd seen the Doctor, admitting out loud that the pull Emma had over him, and the ties that brought him closer to her each and every day were something he'd never known before but had always been searching for.
He loved her, and he knew it because she was the first thing he thought of in the morning, and the last thing before he went to sleep. He knew because all his actions and all his choices held new considerations that revolved around her. He knew because being with her felt like Christmas as a child, the first warm day after a brutal winter, and the lurch of a roller coaster down the summit all wrapped into one. Nothing and no one held a candle to her, and all Killian wanted was to be the person she seemed to think he was and to show her that such a man was worth her love in return.
"It's real for me too, Swan." He heard the happy little sigh that passed through her lips and knew that this was enough as far as professions went for right now. He would be greedy in one respect though, and ask her to spend another mystery evening with him. Ever since their first date, he'd found that surprising Emma brought him a particular sort of joy. With each success, he felt her wariness of them shifting, as if his efforts were undoing some bitter remembrances from her past. By now she was more than amiable when he enquired without giving details of their destination.
"So I'll see you later?" She asked not bothering to contain her excitement when they'd reached her front gate.
"Aye, love."
"Good." Then she kissed him gently before returning inside and leaving Killian already anxiously awaiting their reunion.
…..
"I honestly can't remember the last time I came to one of these. We used to go all the time when we first moved here, but I don't know… we forgot about them or something." Emma looked around the interior of the Storybrooke Cineplex with a smile on her face. This place held a lot of history, and a lot of character, and once a month it hosted a classic movie night, paying tribute to everything from Gone With the Wind to Rocky Horror. Tonight's movie was one of Emma's favorites – Singing in the Rain.
"A good surprise then, love?" Emma nodded, knowing that she'd somehow made him just as happy as she felt right now by liking the surprise. She didn't fully understand what he got out of giving her so much, but she loved his inclination to do so all the same.
"Very good." They walked through the lobby, gathering their snacks and tickets before entering the theater itself. As Emma expected, it was a pretty light showing of people, and for a while they thought they might even have the theater to themselves. Unfortunately for them, that would not be the case.
"Oh look at you two kids here! Is it date night?" Emma closed her eyes and bit back a groan. The gaggle was here, and now she and Killian were in for a night of… well a whole lot of public attention and loud musings on how they worked as a couple.
How to describe this band of ladies that called Storybrooke home? One could call them a coalition of elderly, well meaning, nosey as all heck, kind-hearted, meddlers who were wonderful and loathsome at the same time. Any other time of day, seeing them would be a treat, but not tonight, not when Emma wanted romance and a carefree time out with her boyfriend.
"It is, Doris. How very perceptive of you. And you all look lovely tonight, ladies." Emma squeezed Killian's hand tighter, whispering in his ear.
"Charming them is only going to make this worse." Killian replied back with the same whispered tone.
"I've faced foes scarier than this, love. Trust me." They looked back to the gaggle and all of them were still preening from Killian's compliment.
"You know we've been waiting so long for someone to sweep our Emma off her feet. We didn't think anyone would ever catch her fancy," Glenda said jovially as Marie clucked a bit in agreement before supplanting her own dollop of mortification on Emma.
"She's a bit choosy, that one." Emma nearly squeaked from embarrassment, but Killian handled it with grace.
"You can imagine how lucky I feel to have been found sufficient then, for she is a marvel." The old women were practically fanning themselves now, and Emma had maybe thirty seconds left in her before she laughed or screamed or something, but Killian continued on. "In fact, I'm now rethinking this entire evening out. We should be making as many memories as Gene and Debby did, not simply watching them. If you'll excuse us."
To sell the sentiment, Killian swept Emma up in his arms, carrying her out of the screening room, leaving the older ladies in a tizzy about Killian's romantic tendencies and how nice a young man he was. When he let Emma back down to her feet, she ran a hand over his chest looking into his mirth filled blue eyes.
"Admit that you love all the attention." Killian shrugged, taking Emma's hand in his.
"I love that this whole town knows you're mine and I'm yours, and if anyone had any doubts, they'll be gone by morning." Emma gaped at him.
"You're using them as your own unofficial PR team?!" Killian nodded.
"Aye, love. Far more efficient than enlisting a town crier on my own – besides they love it, and I think that you do to." They were back out on the street once more and only then did Killian seem to realize that his date night now lacked direction. He ran a hand through his hair thinking.
"You know, if you were willing to give me the reins on this, I could probably manage to salvage our movie date." Killian raised a brow at Emma's comment and damn if it didn't cause a happy little flutter to course through her.
"Have you been holding out on me all this time, love? You have some sort of movie connections I'm unaware of?" She laughed and he smiled, cementing Emma's desire to call in this favor and keep the evening going.
"Stick with me, kid, and all of Storybrooke can be your kingdom." He barked out a laugh at that as Emma pulled out her phone, scrolling through her contacts before finding the one she needed.
"Hello?" Emma bit back a smile at the somewhat sleep-riddled voice answering the phone.
"Tink – wake up, I need a favor." Her friend groaned through the receiver.
"Emma, you are cutting into some prime nap time right now." Emma checked her phone's clock – yeah it was 7 PM. No respectable person should be napping right now.
"Look outside, Tink." She heard her friend's string of curse words and some banging around that told Emma Tink was getting out of bed, having clearly overslept. "I'm calling in the big one." Tink sighed.
"I knew this day was coming. Meet you there in ten." With that they hung up and Emma looked back to Killian who couldn't keep the questioning from his face.
"That was extremely curious Swan." Emma grinned, leading him further through Storybrooke until they reached their destination: the high school. "I'm still not following love."
"It's your turn to trust me. Just wait." In a matter of moments a car pulled up towards where they were and Tink hopped out, looking flustered but intrigued all the same.
"Must be some big deal for you to call in a favor like this." Emma looked up at Killian and smirked.
"He certainly thinks so. Tink this is Killian, Killian my friend Tink. She works with Elsa and Liam at the school."
Emma would pay to know what Killian was thinking as he extended a hand to her petite friend who was dressed entirely in varying shades of green (her signature color) and who gave off a defensive, almost scrappy vibe. Tink was by no means the most amiable person on first meetings, but she was someone Emma had grown to appreciate over the years, and to truly count as one of her favorite people. Still, Killian must be wondering why they needed Tink to get into the school when they had so many other connections to the place.
"It's a pleasure, love." Tink regarded him for a minute, extending her hand eventually and shaking Killian's in greeting.
"Okay, I can see it. But he's not gunna narc or anything right?" Emma glanced to Killian, who still stood there a bit shocked. He looked at her for guidance but Emma simply shrugged.
"Well, are you?" Killian shook his head.
"No, love." Tink nodded.
"Good, then let's do this." Pulling a string of keys from her pocket, Tink unlocked the front door and led them down the barely lit hallway. Emma told her friend that they'd need the library and the auditorium. Emma then whispered to Killian as they walked.
"Tink and I made a bet a couple of years ago about which of us could fare better in the annual cider donut eating contest. If she won, she got to paint my bug green, if I won, I got this." Killian raised a brow.
"But what is this, love?" Tink grunted at Killian's question.
"An all access pass to the school on a night of her choosing, and getting to watch me involved in some grade-a delinquency." Killian blinked at Emma.
"What? Old habits die hard, and sometimes I like to bring others to the dark side too."
"I'd hardly call you a member of the dark side love. But I struggle to understand how you manage these subdued tendencies for breaking and entering given your sisters." Emma sighed.
"It's a struggle, because they are your garden variety goody goodies despite what you saw at the shower, but I try my best. They'd never do something like this though, even if it makes such a good story." Tink snorted out a laugh as they stepped in front of the library and she unlocked the door.
"That's an understatement." At that moment, Tink's phone dinged and she pulled it out, her whole demeanor suddenly changing. If Emma didn't know any better, she'd say Tink was blushing. "Hey if I give you the keys, can you handle yourself?"
"You know I can. I'll drop them off in the morning." Tink nodded and headed back out into the hallway, leaving Emma and Killian alone once more.
As soon as the door closed, Killian's arms were around Emma and his lips were on hers in a demanding kiss. It took only the briefest moment for Emma to catch up to his level of enthusiasm, not pulling back until both their breathing was ragged. They leaned their foreheads against each other as they tried to catch their breath.
"I take it you like my little bit of rule breaking." His hands ran over her hips, keeping her close.
"I'm a fan of every part of you love, but this element has a certain kind of appeal to me." The words were dripping in innuendo and Emma's whole body heated at the promise in his tone. She would love to explore his desire for this side of her, but they had a plan, and she intended to stick to it. Emma stepped back, keeping her hand in his and moving towards the movie section of the library stacks.
"They don't have a big selection or anything, and I doubt they have Singing In the Rain here, but I'm sure there's something viewable." Emma flicked through the titles, finding a lot of good options, but none that really called out to her until at last she saw it, The Princess Bride. "Like this. This is a classic."
"Never seen it." Emma blinked at him.
"You've never seen The Princess Bride?!" He shook his head, and Emma's whole body hummed with excitement at showing it to him. "It's easily one of my favorite movies. Funny, bizarre, emotional at parts, but really just a good story." Killian stepped forward to kiss her cheek.
"Then I think we've found our choice, love." Emma nodded, and they made their way back through the hall to the auditorium.
A few years back, the school completely revamped the space thanks to a generous donation from one of the town's prominent families. It was now outfitted with comfortable seats, a great sound system and a projector with quality to die for. It would be the perfect place to watch the movie, but before that, they had one more stop to hit. Just outside the auditorium was a vending machine, 'the good one' if Liam's intel could be trusted and it would be their means for snacks this evening.
"You've thought of everything, Swan." Killian said as she pulled out her purse and gathered change enough to grab them what they needed and she could hear something a lot like pride in his voice. She blushed under the intensity of his gaze as she made her selections and offered him something she knew he liked.
"I'm good at adapting."
"An admirable quality to have." Emma considered that and agreed, liking that their opinions seemed to be so in tune.
Without further delay Emma got the DVD hooked up to the projector, turned everything on thanks a trusty manual in the top drawer of the booth, and returned to her seat beside Killian. She watched as the movie opened and noticed that she knew almost every line at this point, but every time she looked over to Killian he seemed just as entertained as she was.
"You neglected to tell me that this was a movie with pirates, love. Quite a selling point." She always thought so too. There was just something about a good-looking man wielding a sword and living as an outlaw on the open seas that got her going. Giving Killian a once over she realized he might have made a very good-looking pirate if he lived in a story like this one.
"I've always had a soft spot for them." Killian chuckled, setting those blue eyes her way once more.
"Is that right? And what about those of us bound to a life of sailing without the excitement of banditry?" Emma smiled, knowing that underneath his teasing he really cared how she saw him one way or another.
How could she show Killian that she thought so highly of him she felt brave enough to fall in love? Emma may not be entirely ready to admit it out loud, but it was happening. She was falling for him and how could she not? He was thoughtful and kind, undeniably the most attractive man she'd ever met, adventurous, and honest. He brought together all the attributes she didn't dare to think one man could have, and then he brought something more, something so integral to who he was that just clicked into place in her heart. They'd both been through so much, and come out on the other side, somehow hoping that things could be better. She'd never given any thought to happy endings before Killian, and now she did. That was how she knew that with Killian, there was a chance at being truly content.
"I know one sailor at least with a 'claim to my affections.'" He grinned at her attempted accent.
"Actually not that bad this try, love." That was high praise from the man who'd told her time and time again these past few weeks that her accent needed work. They settled into the rest of the movie, holding hands as the time flew by. In the end, Killian more than appreciated his Princess Bride education, and walked Emma home as he did at the end of each of these dates going on and on about the best parts and the surprising twists and turns the story took.
"I told you you'd be a fan." Killian nodded.
"I never doubted you for a moment, Swan." They'd arrived once more at her doorway, and the next part came more naturally than anything in Emma's life. She reached for him stepping into his arms and kissing him with all the passion and desire that was bottled up inside of her, only to then step back again to say goodnight.
"Goodnight, Killian." His hand remained on her cheek where it had moved during their kiss.
"Goodnight, Emma." Just before opening the door though she added something beyond their usual goodbye.
"Someday I won't have to say goodnight because you'll stay with me, and I really hope that day comes soon." Killian's eyes were filled with fire. She could see him warring with himself to come inside and give them both what they wanted right now, but all he did was kiss her lightly once more. Emma then walked inside, closed the door, and rested her back against it when it was firmly shut behind her. She could have sworn that through the wooden beams she heard a soft murmuring of words that meant the world to her.
"As you wish."
I love you too, she thought to herself, and Emma knew in her heart it was the truth.
Post-Note: So there we have it, another fluffy addition to 'In Your Light.' Sorry not sorry about already throwing in the L word, but I love when my Captain Swan babies both know they love each other but hold back on saying it for a while. I'm anticipating the M rating to come if not next chapter than the one immediately following it, because even if it hasn't been that many chapters, it feels like a longer time since the installments have been wordier for this story than my past ones. I hope that you are all enjoying so far, and as always I would love to hear what you think, and if there's something else you guys were hoping to see in this fic. Thanks again and have a lovely Tuesday!