A/N – I know, I know…This one's late as well. Uni was a bitch, work is evil and real life is also interfering with fic. LOL. On a side note, if you want to know more about me and have MySpace the link to my MySpace profile can be found at the bottom of my author profile. Check it out sometime. And feel free to drop me a line and add me as a friend if you like…Though, be warned, my penname here at FFN should never be mentioned on myspace, for fear of people I know and speak to on a daily basis reading my fics…
Severus spent the rest of the week in an almost frantic state of mind. From what he'd gathered from Goyle and Malfoy's hushed conversations in Potions, Hermione was carrying his child. He was certain it was his as she had spent the entirety of the holidays with him, and he knew, from Malfoy's own admission, that she hadn't completely given herself to any other man, due to the castle's wards remaining firm. Thus, there was only one possible candidate – Him!
Merlin, he wasn't ready to be a father.
And, furthermore, she wasn't ready to be a mother! She was barely nineteen, for pity's sake! Little more than a child herself!
An avalanche of questions overwhelmed him as he came to grips with the revelation, the most prominent of which being: how long had she known?
Was her behaviour with Malfoy somehow caused by his own inability to acknowledge her while she grappled alone with the knowledge that she was pregnant? If that was the case, then he certainly couldn't allow her to take all the blame for her indiscretion…He should have noticed…He should have seen the signs! She'd been moody, her emotions had been going haywire, she'd been clingier than usual…And he'd essentially told her that their relationship was a mistake. That he didn't need her any longer.
Which, naturally, hadn't been his intention at all. She was the best thing to ever happen to him (if one could excuse the cliché) and he'd panicked.
But now, with the knowledge that she was expecting his child, he knew he had to swallow his pride and apologise. He owed it to her, and to his unborn child, to provide the best possible future for them as a family, and there was no way to do that without mending their broken relationship first.
So, all he had to do was wait until Friday evening, when he could corner her on her own and have a proper discussion. They needed to set things right.
-?-
By the time Friday evening came around, Hermione was looking for any and every excuse to avoid going to her detention. It wasn't that she was afraid of facing Severus and the consequences of her actions, but rather the very thought that the awful Matthews woman would be there again. Just the thought of Severus and that wench together made her nauseous. If she were to see them together again, she wasn't certain she'd be able to hold her tongue…or her dinner.
"You'd best 'urry if you don't want to make 'im even angrier." Greg said, shaking her from her reverie.
"Can't someone tell him that I've died or something?" She moaned. "I'm certain that would please him."
She missed the look Draco and Greg shared.
"I seriously doubt it, Granger." The former replied, ushering her to the door. "Now get going! The sooner you arrive, the easier he'll be to get along with."
Harry snorted. "Yeah, right."
Hermione smiled weakly, "My thoughts exactly."
-?-
Down in the Dungeons, Severus was trying his very best to remove Siobhan Matthews from his classroom. In his panicked state, he'd completely forgotten about his bid to make Hermione believe that he, too, had moved on with someone despicable, and now the bint wouldn't leave him alone.
"Come on, SevvieWevvie, just one more? Like last week?"
He scowled; inviting her to assist him with his brewing had been the largest lapse of his judgement to date. "No. I have a detention to supervise and your presence is not required."
"Ohh," she grinned wickedly. "Is it the high and mighty Head Girl again?" When he refused to respond, she cackled. "It is! Oh, Sevvie, you must let me stay! The look on her face last week was priceless."
"I do not want you in my classroom, Siobhan."
She pouted. "But we had such fun last week."
His eyes widened incredulously. "Fun?" He echoed, casting his mind back to the previous Friday evening. "You ruined an experimental potion I had been working on for weeks, and you damn near exploded my best cauldron! It was not fun by any means."
"But, Sev-"
"And I have told you numerous times to never call me such hideous pet names! Now get out of my sight!"
He threw a jar of leeches at the nearest wall to illustrate his point and took pleasure out of seeing her flinch.
"NOW!" He bellowed, and smirked to himself as she fled from the room as fast as her skinny legs would carry her.
"Trouble in paradise?"
He spun around to the doorway to face Hermione, noting, absently, that she looked somewhat green around the gills.
"That is none of your concern."
She shrugged. Honestly, she hadn't meant to comment, but couldn't help herself when the opportunity presented itself. "Where do I need to begin tonight, Sir?"
Though he had originally planned to talk to her like any other concerned soon-to-be-father would, he was too riled up to even contemplate it, and waved absently at the broken jar of leeches he had thrown. "Clean that up –without magic- then proceed to the cauldrons again."
"Yes, Sir."
Those were the last words they exchanged for the evening. Hermione worked steadfastly, ignoring his presence to the best of her ability. Severus, on the other hand, couldn't tear his eyes away from her, and fought his concern every time she moaned in pain or rubbed at aching muscles. At a quarter to twelve he released her from her duties and dismissed her from his classroom with strict orders to come directly after dinner the next week.
Once in his own quarters he dropped down onto the couch with a sigh. Next week, he decided, he would set things right.
-?-
Hermione sighed as she curled up in bed. She'd arrived at her detention just in time to hear Severus shout and to see her other Potions professor dart down the hall. She wondered, idly, whether he'd grown tired of her, too. Not that it would be hard to do with that woman…but it was becoming quite clear that Severus Snape was far less interested in maintaining a relationship than he first made out to be.
Still, as she had noted many months earlier, anything was better than the thought of that wench having him! Hermione could reconcile herself with the thought of her former lover finding solace in another witch's embrace, but never with Siobhan Matthews. So, though she'd felt ill when she'd seen them together, she couldn't help but feel awfully smug at the evidence that they were 'on the rocks'.
That doesn't mean they won't make up, Hermione. A voice in her head reminded her. And it has been said that making up is half the fun…
As if to accompany the notion, lewd images of Severus Snape and Siobhan Matthews filtered through her mind, and she felt ill again.
Urgh! She thought, her eyes snapping shut.
Why did they haunt her even in her private time? Why couldn't she just accept that it was over? Why did she have to drive herself insane with the very thought of them? It was just too much.
Grumbling in annoyance, she summoned her latest text book on Ancient Runes and forced herself to study. After all, if she wasn't going to be able to sleep, the least she could do would be to use her time constructively…
-?-
Noticing that Hermione was in no better shape that weekend, Greg and Draco made the decision to put Phase Two of their scheme into action. This next phase was even more cunning –and, thus, even more immoral- than the one preceding it. But desperate times called for desperate measures…and, if nothing else, it would provide them with stories with which to amuse their grandchildren in decades to come.
-?-
At breakfast on Monday morning, Severus scowled as Hermione clamped a hand to her mouth and raced out of the Great Hall. It seemed that she was still suffering from bouts of morning sickness. He had done his maths (and his research) that weekend; she had to be in her second trimester by now. Morning sickness generally faded after the first. Some unlucky carriers experienced it in the following months, though in the Wizarding World it was safe to seek medicinal potions after the third month should the sickness continue…
Clearly, though, Hermione wasn't seeking any medical attention, most likely for fear of losing her Head Girl position or, worse, having to reveal the identity of the child's father.
Foolish girl. He internally seethed. She was putting both herself and their child in danger by not going to a Mediwitch! Thankfully, though, the Easter Holidays would begin at the end of the week, and he would be able to corner and subsequently talk some sense into her then.
-?-
Goyle felt just a little guilty for lacing Hermione's breakfast with a Vomiting Vapour (a Weasley twin invention), but it had been worth it to see Snape barely restrain himself from racing after her in concern. The next step, however, was a little trickier…He had to somehow plant a seed of doubt in her own mind, so that when Snape finally broke and confronted her, the entire plan wouldn't blow up in his face and bring them both seeking vengeance.
"Oi, Granger, you feelin' alright?" He asked cautiously as she dropped down beside him at lunch. "You looked a bit green this mornin'…"
She crinkled her nose, remembering her mad rush to the nearest restroom. "Don't remind me, Greg…I think it was just something I ate…"
He nodded in acceptance. "Well then," he started, piling her plate with food, "Best you get your fill now…Can't have you wastin' away on us…"
As she rolled her eyes, he worked a small charm over her goblet which would hopefully allow her to 'skip' her next period, furthering her suspicions. If all went well, she'd be running directly to Snape in no time…
-?-
Hermione scowled at the mirror as she washed her face. For the last week or so she'd been feeling run down and had thrown up every other day; sometimes in the morning, other times at night. It was beginning to drive her mad with frustration. She was relatively certain it was stress causing her body to react so horribly, and made a pact with herself to relax over the upcoming Easter break. No NEWT studies…nothing. Just some private time for rest and relaxation. However, she had to survive the rest of the day first, which included detention with Severus.
"Mornin'," Greg greeted from the sofa, "Feelin' any better today?"
She shook her head and he frowned.
"You know, if I didn't know any better, I'd say you were up the duff, what with the tossin' your breakfast and all…"
She snorted derisively. "It's a good thing you know better then, isn't it?"
He smiled and nodded, having successfully just planted the seeds of doubt in her mind. "Most certainly." He glanced at the clock and rose from his seat. "Ready to face the day, then?"
-?-
By the time her detention rolled around, Hermione was a nervous wreck. She'd laughed Greg's comment off that morning, but, more and more, she was beginning to second guess her body. It was true that she had missed her period this last cycle, though she'd put it down to stress, and then there was the illness and the constant tiredness…Merlin, but it didn't make sense! Shouldn't these symptoms have shown themselves months ago?
Having surreptitiously consulted her Sexual Education text over lunch, she'd realised that there was no real 'formula' for the symptoms. So erratic was the pattern that some young men and women never even realised they were pregnant until it was time to give birth…though that was a very small statistic, and the cynic in Hermione was almost certain that some of them just claimed ignorance to avoid further attacks from their families...
However, all cynicism aside, Hermione was currently panicking. She'd need to brew a potion, of course, to confirm her suspicions, but requesting the ingredients from her ex-lover and possible soon-to-be father of her child was not an option. Nor was stealing them.
She would simply have to wait until the morning and get permission to visit Hogsmeade. After all, she was planning on staying at Hogwarts for the Easter break, it shouldn't be too difficult to convince Professor McGonagall to let her go while everyone else headed to the station.
But she had to make it through this detention first. Which would be easier said than done.
-?-
It was Friday night and, once again, Severus found himself having to forcefully remove Siobhan Matthews from his classroom. She seemed intent on making Hermione as uncomfortable as possible upon her arrival, and he was having none of it.
"…But, Sevvy, I want to stay and help! Merlin only knows how terribly boring detentions are to supervise! I can make it…fun." She winked suggestively.
Swallowing his revulsion at the simple act, Severus scowled. "Damn it, Woman, this is the last time I will tell you not to refer to me with your blasted pet names!" At her pout he glowered, "And my answer remains the same; you are not welcome during Miss Granger's detention."
"But Sev-" he shot her a warning glance and she quickly changed tact, "-erus, please, can't you just see how entertaining upsetting the little bint would be? She's clearly attracted to you…It's amusing to see her flare up with jealousy."
If you only knew, he mused, before responding, "That little bint, as you so maturely phrased it, is a student, Siobhan. Merely speaking of her like that is an insult to the profession you have chosen to pursue. And, as I have stated before, Miss Granger's intellect is damn near unrivalled, even by myself. To refer to her with such base terms further illustrates the reasons behind my refusal to allow you to remain here. The girl has had a trying year and you choose only to exacerbate it; I will not allow you to behave so childishly in my classroom."
She gaped at him. "You're defending the little tart! I don't believe it…You're interested in her, too!"
"You speak out of turn, Siobhan." His tone was near lethal. "And, as per usual, you are spouting absolute drivel! I am doing my job as a teacher and am demanding that a student under my care is treated with the respect she deserves. We are not in this school to parade ourselves about them in a game of power relations; we are here to guide these young adults through their schooling years – something you clearly do not comprehend."
Hermione paused outside the door to the Potions classroom and held her breath. She hadn't heard Severus speak so passionately in what felt like eons, and it surprised her that it was his profession which he was defending so vehemently. She peered around the corner to catch the end of his tirade:
"…If anyone is the 'tart' here, Matthews, it is most undeniably you." He concluded, red spots of anger firmly situated above his cheekbones.
Hermione noted that, for maximum effect on the horrid woman's humiliation, now would be the perfect moment to enter the classroom. So, straightening her uniform and plastering a concerned look upon her face, she cautiously knocked on the door frame.
"Forgive me for intruding, Sir, but the door was open…" She played up her naivety and innocence for the purpose of irritating Matthews even more. "I hope I haven't interrupted anything important?"
"Of course you have, you nosey little brat!" The woman in question hissed, while Severus scowled.
"Silence!" He snapped, before turning back to Hermione. She looked healthier than he'd seen her all week, and his spirits rose slightly. Understanding what she was scheming, he smirked and followed along with her ploy, "You have not interrupted anything important, Miss Granger. Professor Matthews was just leaving, and your detention was scheduled to start in a minute at any rate."
Her eyes glittered with amusement. Well done, Severus, she acknowledged with a nod. "Yes, Sir."
It was obvious that Siobhan Matthews was having a difficult time reigning in her temper. She turned on Hermione and glared, "I will find evidence that the two of you-" here she gestured wildly between them "-are partaking in an illegal relationship, and I look forward to seeing you both thrown out of this school!"
The Potions Master and his detained student shared a look that spoke volumes about their companion's sanity (or, rather, the lack thereof) and the former narrowed his gaze, "I've already warned you about the consequences of threatening your students, Professor Matthews, and I suggest you consider them as you make your way out of my classroom." And on that note, he spun deftly on his heel and addressed Hermione, "Now, Miss Granger, I believe tonight you shall sort the ingredients cupboard…"
Having been thoroughly dismissed, Siobhan glowered at Hermione and exited the room with a huff, resolved to humiliate the Head Girl and the Potions Master before the end of the school year.
Absolutely certain that Matthews was out of earshot, Severus' instructions trailed off and he frowned at his detainee. "Just what, pray tell, were you thinking when you decided to provoke a Professor?"
"I'm sorry?" Hermione raised an incredulous eyebrow. "It seemed to me that, if I hadn't intervened, the two of you would still be bickering…"
She realised, as the words left her lips, that antagonising Severus Snape, like she would Harry and Ron, was, perhaps, a very bad idea.
Obsidian eyes blinked back at her. "You are skating on very thin ice, Granger, so I advise you to avoid fuelling my ire."
Despite the fact that Hermione knew she should keep her mouth shut, she found herself on the defensive. "I see, so I just imagined you struggling to kick Professor Matthews out of this room, then…"
Severus advanced upon her – the very picture of danger – until he'd backed her up against the nearest wall. "How dare you speak to me-"
"Oh, for Merlin's sake, Severus!" She cut him off, her own eyes blazing, "If you think this-" she gestured at his intimidating stance "-scares me these days, you're sorely mistaken." Sighing, she allowed her features to soften. "I'm sorry my actions this evening were unwarranted, but that cow had it coming. Besides," she smirked, "you clearly enjoyed it…"
"Whether I found myself absorbed in the moment or not is not your concern. You provoked a member of the staff, and, as such, have earned yourself more detentions following the Easter Break."
The Head Girl could hardly believe what she was hearing. She had assisted him and this was the thanks she got? "Severus, you and I both know that is entirely unfair!"
"Twenty points for your complete lack of respect for a Professor."
She stared back, unable to speak. Any resolve to tell him about her suspected condition was put on the backburner as her anger got the better of her. "I'm sorry, Professor. Maybe I should just go ahead and start sorting those ingredients before I do something I'll really regret?"
Severus scowled, now incredibly incensed. "I think not. No; tonight you will be on your hands and knees, scrubbing the floor with a Muggle toothbrush!"
Hermione narrowed her eyes. He was being unreasonable and cruel! Even more so than usual! Realising that arguing with him would only get her into more trouble, she reigned in her temper and nodded. "Yes, Professor."
-?-
Having sent the Head Girl back to her quarters after curfew, Severus sat in his own living area nursing a snifter of firewhiskey and musing over how easily the detention had gotten out of hand. He knew his temper was namely to blame, and he felt –as he usually felt- an enormous sense of guilt. Hermione was pregnant with his child and he'd allowed his temper to cloud his judgement, so much so that he had forced her to do backbreaking labour for hours on end, which would definitely not be good for her health, nor the child's.
With a sigh, he set aside his glass and massaged his temples. How on earth was he going to be an adequate father if he couldn't even treat Hermione with a modicum of respect? Even more important still – would she, given the way he had treated her, even allow him the opportunity to know his child? Not unless he changed his behaviour.
Then I must apologise, he decided, I will swallow my blasted pride and treat the mother of my child as she should be treated.
He knew, of course, that it would be easier said (or, rather, thought) than done, but he would stand by his word as soon as the opportunity presented itself.
Naturally, that would be sooner than he'd anticipated.
-?-
"But, Professor, I won't be long in Hogsmeade…" Hermione pleaded with the Head of Gryffindor the next morning after breakfast, "I just have to pick up a book and-"
"I've said no, Miss Granger." McGonagall's stern brogue cut in to her pleas, "It is still far too dangerous to allow any students to visit the village unsupervised. Have you considered placing an owl order?"
Yes, the Head Girl had considered it, but refused to order her ingredients via owl on the off chance that they were intercepted or tampered with. However, it was clear that she would be getting nowhere with her Head of House and chose to go about attaining the ingredients some other way. Plastering a self-depricating smile on her face, she hit her forehead and sighed. "Oh, how silly of me! Forgive me, Professor McGonagall, I haven't been thinking clearly...I'll go and send that owl now." Sparing the Professor one last glance she scampered down the hall, only to run straight into the Headmaster.
"Ah, Miss Granger, just the young soul I've been hoping to see…"
-?-
"Absolutely not!" Hermione and Severus cried out in unison, having been shepherded into Dumbledore's office under the pretence of making certain their relationship was 'on the mend'. Once seated and obligated, through cups of tea, to stay, the old man had sprung his new 'request' upon them – to spend the Easter holidays together again, preferably at Snape Manor once more because he felt that they 'both deserve some fresh air away from this silly old castle'.
"Headmaster," Snape was the first to recover from the not-so-pleasant surprise, "I beseech you…Allow me at least one holiday to myself…"
Albus was hearing none of it. He waved Severus's request away as though it were a mosquito. "Nonsense, my boy…You need the company." He glanced sideways at Hermione. "You both do."
The Potions Master was immediately alert. Did the old coot know something about the Head Girl's condition? Was he, Severus, somehow implicated? No; if that was the case he would have been sacked by now…so what on earth was going on?
Hermione chose that moment to voice her own opinion. "Professor Dumbledore…I appreciate the sentiment, but I do feel that Professor Snape deserves some alone time…And I enjoy being on my own. It allows me time to study. Besides, there are other students remaining at the school…"
"First and second years namely, my dear girl. Nobody who you can honestly say will provide adequate social stimulation for you…" The Headmaster's eyes were kind as he spoke. "I would not have a clear conscience if I allowed you to stay here practically on your own…"
Snape's chair flew backwards as he jumped up in anger. "Then you must suffer with a guilty conscience, Albus, because I refuse!"
With a handy bit of wandless magic, the chair resumed its rightful place in front of the desk, and the Headmaster of Hogwarts gestured calmly for Severus to take his seat again. "Severus, you can not refuse…Hermione's parents have already expressed their delight at the news, as they are, sadly, at another conference abroad. They were most pleased she wouldn't be…how did Mrs Granger put it?...Ah, yes, 'trapped in a lonely old castle with only books for company'…" He smiled and reached for his tea. "They were even more pleased to hear that Hermione would be in your capable hands. It seems our Miss Granger has expressed her high esteem for you for years…"
The girl in question was blushing furiously, while Severus glowered into his tea. There was no avoiding it – they would be alone, in his Manor, for two weeks. The cogs in his brain started to turn. Surely he could use the situation to his advantage? Allow Hermione to come to him with her dilemma, rather than forcing himself to confront her…Perhaps even rebuild their friendship, if nothing else…
With a melodramatic sigh, he rose from his seat and stared down at his employer. "Fine." He spat, before turning to face Hermione. Features softening slightly, he nodded at her. "You'd best pack your belongings, there is nothing we can do to remedy this situation. I expect you in the Entrance Hall in no more than an hour."
Hermione sat in a stunned silence as he swept out of the office. Somehow she knew this Easter would not be one to forget in a hurry.
-?-
An hour later found Hermione and Severus climbing into a carriage to take them to the train station. The atmosphere between them was thick with tension, though neither of them spoke a word. At the station, they found a secluded carriage on the Express and continued on in silence. When they were a quarter of an hour away from Central Station, Severus cleared his throat.
Hermione looked at him expectantly.
"It is about time to make ourselves appear more Muggle."
She rolled her eyes and removed her robe, having thought ahead and worn a complete Muggle outfit beneath it. Meeting his gaze, she raised an eyebrow. "Is this satisfactory, Professor?"
He winced at her tone and tore his gaze away. It wouldn't do to be caught staring at her stomach, after all. "It will suffice, yes."
"And what about you, Sir?" She asked sweetly, deliberately giving him the once-over. "Don't you need to get into Muggle attire?"
Taking a deep breath, he, too, removed his robe to reveal Muggle clothing. Smirking, he cocked his head to the side. "Is this satisfactory, Miss Granger?" He mocked.
Feeling a blush rise up to her cheeks, Hermione averted her gaze. She hated herself for allowing him to affect her so. It had been months, and still the sight of him undressing before her (if only to remove a robe) induced a lusty throb in her body.
Mentally berating himself for doing exactly what he'd told himself he was to avoid, Severus sighed. "Hermione, I apologise…"
"What?" The use of her name startled her out of her reverie. She blinked back at him. "What in Merlin's name are you playing at?"
"I apologise for my behaviour these last few months. I admit I haven't been the man I led you to believe I could be…"
Dear Merlin, he's talking in riddles! Hermione frowned. "No, you haven't. But I also told you that I wasn't expecting anything extravagant. All I asked was that you treat me as an equal…and the second we were back in that school you treated me as little better than a first year…"
He opened his mouth to respond, but snapped it shut again. The phrase 'I was afraid and panicked' seemed far too juvenile for his liking. Having hesitated, he tried again; "I realise my behaviour was out of line, and I can offer no plausible excuse for it. I know that my apologies hardly suffice, though they are all I can truly give you at this point in time."
The Head Girl considered his words and his countenance. He genuinely appeared remorseful. And he had avoided the opportunity to throw her own behaviour (namely her actions with Malfoy) back at her.
But that doesn't mean anything. The voice of reason spoke up in her mind. He was a double agent, Hermione. And has openly admitted his ability to fool others is well polished.
Though she knew this was true, Hermione couldn't help but feel that, if nothing else, he deserved to be heard, perhaps even given another chance. Merlin only knew how horrid she'd felt when she thought her friends would never speak to her again.
Eyes bright with emotion, she offered him a small smile. "If that's the case, Severus, then I feel I should apologise as well. I should have handled the situation more maturely…and I should never have abused your trust by turning to Malfoy at Valentine's…" Her cheeks were scarlet but she ploughed on. "It doesn't make it right, I know, but I have missed you. On many, many levels…"
Severus felt his blood boil at the reminder of her betrayal, but forced himself to remember his vow from the previous evening. He would fix his relationship with Hermione Granger, and forgiving her of past indiscretions (which he vaguely acknowledged he had pushed her towards) would be the first of many steps towards a real reconciliation. He owed it to her and, more importantly, to their child. Swallowing his ire, he met her gaze and found warmth, insecurity, love and, above all, hope.
"And I," he admitted softly, "have missed you, as well."
A/N- Right, this is perhaps one of the shortest chapters to date, and, while I had more planned for it, it felt right to leave it here. The other planned scenes will be added on to the next chapter. And don't fret: I promise Sophia has not been forgotten just yet. I had meant to deal with Severus' issues surrounding her absence in this chapter, but it just didn't seem to fit as I'd hoped it would.
Anywho, I hope it was an enjoyable chapter. I thought you deserved a little speck of fluff as a reward for your patience and wonderful feedback. Though I do wonder how Severus will react when he realises that Hermione is not actually pregnant…((Grin))
And, as usual, if you have suggestions do not hesitate to offer them! As you may have noticed, I do have a tendency to run off with a few of them if I feel they work better than my original plan…But, yes, I'm rambling. Please review!