(A/N: Back from the dead. Temporarily. I'm reaching out of my genre range – romance and fantasy – to get a taste for more books and increase my minute (hehe, it means small, not always a form of time, I'm improving D) vocabulary and literacy level, hopefully I'll be able to improve my writing style too. My non-fanfiction book is actually doing pretty food, I just haven't posted it anywhere on the Internet yet because I restarted it and deleted anywhere that I did have it, XP If anyone cares I'll put it on my deviantart, I kinda-sorta quit GoodReads ;, but for now I'm still obsessing over Maple Story. Is anyone else on it? D This chapters for my Boiled French Fry Rachel, ) Her crush totally destroyed her spirits, and I've actually gone up to him and have been yelling at him – asking her herself her username's toniponi11 D – and now she's mad at me for almost "accidently" tripping him on his crutches. Sadly I didn't put him on them. ,( So anyways I owe her an apology, and here it is. Gawd, that was a long Author's Note. O.o)

Early Morning At the Cullen Household

-doorbell rings-

Edward: Alice go get it.

Alice: Don't sit there drinking coffee and reading the newspaper in your underwear like you just woke up, you've been awake all night D:

Bella: Really, Edward, go get it.

-Alice and Bella share evil grin and devious laugh-

Edward: Zomahgawd, what's wrong here? Bella snorting in an attempt to laugh evilly? And Alice wearing an Indiana Jones hat complete with lasso? Something's up…

Alice: Just open the dam door Edward!! .

Edward: What ev.

Alice: Don't even say 'What ev" unless you know who John Mayer is.

Edward: But I don't.

Alice: Then don't.

Edward: Fine. –saunters to the door and opens it-

Rachel: -at the door- HAY Y'ALLLLL!! 3

Edward: WTF?

Alice: Hey Rachel! Edward, meet Rachel, she's the winner of your contest!

Edward: What contest?

Bella: Your fanclub's contest. Alice set it up so one lucky fangirl got to spend the day with you if they wrote an essay on why they love you so much.

Edward: WHAT?

Rachel: Edward, you don't have the British accent I imagined you to have…

Edward: Huh?

Alice: Duh. Only Simon Cowell and Ferb (from Phineas and Ferb) can pull one off anyways.

Rachel: Then he should dye his hair green.

Edward: YOU'RE TALKING LIKE I'M NOT EVEN HERE! –pokes Rachel- What did your essay say anyways?

Bella: -clears throat and pulls out a paper- 'Edward Cullen is hot – well, freekin freezing cold, but SMEXY HAWTT! Almost smexier than Spongebob—'

Edward: You're comparing me to Spongebob?

Rachel: At least you can play the noseflute.

Edward: How did you know that?!

Bella: ANYWAYS, 'Werewolves are icky and sweaty. And they have gaudy curtainy-hair. And they creep me out with their pervertedness. Eww.' She rambles pretty much the rest of the time.

Edward: Why'd she win? That sucked.

Bella: There were a lot of Jake fangirl letters flaming you.

Edward: but polls on Google Fight said I win! TT.TT

Bella: Yeah well in the first chapter of Breaking Dawn everyone felt sorry for Jacob and got mad at me for being a whore and you for marrying me and actually planning to turn me into a vampire for real, and once they realized they have no chance with you they turned to Jacob. (A/N: True story in my case. I read the first chapter at Barnes and Noble with Rachel, D)

Edward: What ev—

Alice: -ahem-

Edward: -er.

Alice: Plus Taylor Laurent –without his wig- is cuter than Robert Pattinson, who portray you two in the movie. (A/N: Also true.)

Edward: No fair. I get an ugly actor. :(

Jacob: -out the window- HAHA!

Bella: Odd… well, anyways, we set this up so that Alice and I could have a Girl's Day Out without you peeing in on Alice's mind for our every move.

Edward: I still can. :K

Alice: Rachel is very… hyper-active, you'll have enough time trying to keep up with her rather than us.

Edward: Joy.

Rachel: Hehehehehehehehehehehe, :)

(A/N: Short chappie. It's a setup for the next one; I just want to see if anyone's still willing to read this fanfic, so review if you want more!! And yes Spongebob is smexy. Yes I think I like Jacob more now, and yes I watch Phineas and Ferb. Perry the platypus is smexy too, ;D)