Not mine. All the characters belong to Joanne Rowling and DC Comics. Nothing is mine, especially the limericks, which were written by qwanderer. Author's notes are at the end of the chapter, where they belong.

Chapter Two

THE SORTING HAT'S LIMERICKS

As Damian predicted, they reached the Hogsmead station in around five minutes. Colin was the first one out of the door of their compartment, pushing through the crowd into the platform.

'Hey, watch it!' elbowed him in a back some bulky kid with a green tie, who had a misfortune of having Colin step on his foot.

'Sorry!' hurriedly answered Colin, reaching the small staircase out of the train and practically rolling down it. 'So sorry!'

He quickly jumped down on the platform, sidestepped to the right to let others walk free and took a deep breath. The air was cold and smelled of burnt coal and steam, but to Colin it was a smell of magic. His adventure was finally about to begin.

'Firs' years! Firs' years, to me!' sounded above the platform in a loud, deep voice. Colin looked around and in the evening light saw a mountain of dark hair, looking only remotely like human… if humans ever grew almost seven feet tall. In its left hand the mountain held an oil lamp, high above his hand. The person swung its other arm, summoning Colin and the rest. 'Over here!'

Colin shrugged and started walking. As he walked closer, he realised, that most of the hair was, in fact, a dark fur overcoat, that housed a giant man with an incredibly shaggy black hair and massive beard. The giant chuckled, seeing the look of awe on Colin's face and winked at him. Colin smiled – if the giant had been wearing a red suit and had died his hair white, he'd make a decent Santa… except for a fact, that he wouldn't be able to fit into any chimney.

As he looked to the left, he saw his train companion, studying the giant with slightly squinted eyes. As both of them walked closer, the giant performed a headcount, whispering under his nose, and frowned.

'Two more…' he grumbled, looking around and comically standing on the tips of his toes. 'Two more…' He placed the lamp on the ground, put his hands to his face in a shape of cone and shouted again, 'Firs' years! Firs' years, to me!'

A small shape detached from the crowd that was walking towards the carriages, dragging behind her another, somewhat familiar to Colin. Two girls, panting and huffing, ran up to the giant and first years that surrounded him.

'I'm sorry,' whispered the redhead – Ginny, remembered Colin – trying to catch her breath. 'I just followed the rest…'

'And I followed her.' finished the other girl. She looked at giant's face and smiled brightly, 'You must be Mr. Hagrid!'

The giant laughed. 'Aye, 's me.' He turned to all of the kids and took a deep breath. 'I am Rubeus Hagrid, Keymaster and Groundskeeper o' Hogwarts. Follow me.' With this, he turned around and slowly, but steadily started walking down a narrow path, that descended from the platform to the lake nearby. The path was tiled with large, roughly cut stones, but in cold and muddy autumn that meant that it stayed solid and relatively dry.

Wayne "hm"-ed under his nose, rose his head up high and was among the first to follow the giant, preceded only by a frail girl with blonde hair – the one that Ginny had gotten late. Colin and Ginny almost immediately followed their friends, and soon all first-years, in a long and uneven line, were walking down a stone path.

The giant was waiting for them at the bottom of the hill, which doubled as a shore for the lake. Near the end of the path was a small dock, with a dozen or so boats, yet Colin couldn't see any oars. Come to think of it, there weren't any horses in the carriages for the upper years either – wizards appeared to show-off their "wizardiness" in everything. Colin wondered for a second, why were they using a train to send children to school, but was immediately distracted, as the giant turned around and cleared his throat.

'Alright, yeh all here?' He looked at the group of students and smiled. 'Good. Now, then, get inside.' he pointed at the boats. 'Four studen's per one boat.' He once again counted the students, this time silently, and looked back at the boats, looking a little sad. 'O' course there's enough…'

Colin and the rest of the first years slowly walked to the boats, looking at them and choosing which one to ride. Ginny jumped into the closest one to her, and Wayne, apparently feeling competitive, immediately followed. Colin looked at the blonde girl, who offered him a small smile before joining her friend.

Feeling a little weak at the knees, Colin slowly approached the boat and clumsily climbed aboard. Since he was a kid he hated sailing and swimming – the very thought of deep water scared him. And the Hogwarts lake was deep – one book talked about the Hogwarts Squid, that lived in this lake and was as big as a car of Hogwarts Express, with tentacles as long as the train itself.

He took a place by the side of the blonde girl, directly in the back of Wayne, who was already looking around with interest. Suddenly, the oil lamp on the nose of the boat came alive, and with a graceful push the boat started its slow journey into the mist. Colin grabbed the side of the boat with all his strength, yet still couldn't keep himself from looking.

To his left, he saw another lamp, on another boat. Right by the lamp sat a girl, who held a small cage with an owl in her hands. Beside her sat a boy with a curly dark hair, who was actively swinging his hands around, telling some sort of story to the other kids Colin couldn't see. Soon, he realised that he couldn't see their destination either – everything ahead was draped in a thick, grey mist. Colin squinted, yet could not see any sign of light in it.

The redhead must have noticed his fear, because she turned around and offered him an encouraging smile.

'Hi, I'm Ginny! I don't believe we told each other our names back then.' she nodded at her companion, who placed her hand in the water to the side of the boat and was playing with it. 'This is Luna, my friend.'

'Hi…' quietly said the blonde girl, without any other acknowledgement of the conversation. She reached into the pocket of her robes with her other hand, procured a small blue berry and ate it with a distracted expression on her face.

'C-Colin.' whispered Creevey, looking at the glade of the lake against his will, and feeling already consumed, devoured by its horrible blackness. 'He's Damian.' Wayne nodded, yet kept looking forward. Colin ripped his gaze from the lake and forced himself to look at Ginny. 'Did you find your friends?'

'No…' the girl shook her head, pursing her lips. 'Percy sent owls to school and to my parents, but that's all he could do.' She sighed. 'I hope they are alright.'

'They will be.' quietly spoke Luna, removing her hand from the water and smiling at her friend. 'You told me yourself – they can do everything.'

Ginny smiled back with a hint of sadness and reached to grab her friend's hand. 'It's different, Luna. But thank you.'

'They will be.' repeated Luna seriously, tightly holding Ginny's hand. She procured another berry and placed it into Ginny's palm. 'Here, have some. Might help you scare the nargles away.'

'Um…' said Ginny, taking it and studying it suspiciously. 'Oh, what the hell…' she threw the berry in her mouth and started chewing. Next moment, her face cleared and she smiled. 'This is good! What is it?'

'No idea.' smiled Luna back with a shrug. 'I picked some from the bush on the way to boats. Another one?'

Ginny, looking a little green all of a sudden, slowly shook her head. Luna shrugged and ate one herself.

'It's wild blueberries,' chuckled Wayne without turning his head. 'Also… hold on tight', he immediately added in his usual cold tone. Colin looked up and suddenly felt that they were turning, sharply, apparently circling around something massive to his left. In the mist ahead, he saw some blurry lights, and at this very second a strong gust of wind ripped the grey veil from the surface of the lake and Colin saw Her for the first time. And there were no words for him to describe what he saw.

She was majestic. Her stone towers threatened to reach the sky, yet Her walls spread their roots deep into the rock She was built on. In the darkness of the night sky, She was alight with thousands of lights, warm and comfortable, yet promising infinite adventures. In the second Colin Creevey saw Hogwarts he was in love, even if he couldn't even comprehend what "love" even was. This was a moment Colin, for the thousandth time in his life, wished that his stupid, clumsy hands could paint, so he could show people what he really saw. But still, he had the next best thing. Forgetting his fear, he stood up in the boat, pulled his camera from its bag that hang on his neck and started filming.

Click. He caught the photocard and put it in your pocket. Placed a new one in the slot. Click. His hands were going through the motions, never minding that he only had twenty and he had already used three. Click. Suddenly, another gust of wind grabbed the newly filmed photocard, sending it into the lake. Colin reached after it, but it was already caught by a thin pale hand. Luna looked at the card, smiled as the picture of the Hogwarts slowly faded onto it and offered it back to Colin, who, suddenly embarrassed with his outburst, shook his head and gave it to her. She smiled and nodded her thanks before turning back to the castle. The wind had ruffled her hair, and Colin saw that her earrings were, in fact, in form of radishes. And somehow, with Luna, it made sense.

Those fifteen minutes Colin spent on this boat, watching the massive of Hogwarts towering over him, would forever remain in his memory. But, like everything else on Earth, they had to end, and soon the boats came close to the rock that served as a foundation for the castle, aiming for the small dark tunnel ahead. Colin sat back down, putting his camera back in the bag, and took a deep breath. Wayne in front of him was sitting unnaturally still, yet Colin didn't even notice it, until the boy slowly relaxed and loudly gasped for air.

The boats slowly entered the tunnel, which led to a small underground harbour with a huge stone stairwell in the back. A couple of torches, mounted in the walls, casted light over it. Damian was the first one out, emotionless as usual, although he did offer a hand to Colin and the girls. Ginny scoffed at his attempt at gallantry and vaulted over the board, clearly showing off, while Colin simply shook his head and climbed over, but Luna took him up on the offer and gracefully stepped on the solid ground in an almost dancing move.

A couple of THUNKs sounded behind them in a quick succession. Colin turned around and saw other ten boats arrive, followed by a bigger one, that carried Hagrid. First years started climbing out of the wooden vessels, laughing, shouting and, in some cases, splashing the water on their comrades. The boy with dark curly hair – the one that Colin had seen on the neighbouring boat – slipped from the edge of the dock and almost fell in the water, but he was almost immediately grabbed by another boy and a girl and dragged back. The last one to step on dry land was Hagrid, who once again performed a headcount and, satisfied, walked to the staircase, humming some song under his nose.

'Good evening, Hagrid.' said a stern female voice from the top. 'No problems, I believe?'

Colin, with the rest of the students, looked up, surprised. The wooden door on the top of the staircase was open, and there was a woman standing in the doorway. She looked tall, thin, yet strong, wore long green robes and a pointy hat, and on her nose sat a pair of elegant spectacles. She was even older than Colin's grandma, and spoke with the same Scottish pronounce, although much less noticeable.

'Evening, professor,' happily agreed Hagrid, smiling into his beard. 'No more than usual. Firs' years here, safe and on time.'

'Hm.' professor looked over the students, who gathered in a small crowd. 'Thank you, Hagrid. My name is professor McGonagall.' she turned around on her heels. 'Students – follow me.'

With this, she once again went inside the door, as if expecting that all her orders are to be followed. As students started fearfully ascending the staircase, Colin looked back and saw, that Hagrid wasn't wasting his time – the giant man was picking up boats, like they were made out of cardboard, and placing them inside niches in the wall. Colin froze, astonished by such a display of primal, pure strength, and started unclasping his camera bag.

'Hey, snap out of it!' someone shook his shoulder. Colin looked and saw a boy with short, harsh, almost spiky black hair and narrow eyes. 'You don't wanna make this harpy wait, do you?' The boy started running up the stairs, dragging Colin behind him. On third or fourth step Creevey finally came to his senses and shook the boy's hand off. He was a little sad that he couldn't film the giant, but the boy was right. Creevey promised himself that he would find Hagrid later on. As they reached their peers, who were ascending at much slower pace, Colin caught his breath and offered the other boy his hand.

'Thanks. I must have drifted off for a second. I'm Colin.'

'Luke.' The boy shook it with a smile. He spoke fast, like he was afraid to not be given a chance to finish his sentences. 'You are welcome. Trust me, I know a thing or two about pissing off teachers in the first day of school. You don't wanna do this. Unless you really wanna do this, then, of course, go for it!'

Colin chuckled and nodded in understanding. Luke reminded him a little bit of his cousin Terry – if Terry was a couple of years younger and Asian. Terry had a tendency to get into all sorts of trouble in school, and uncle Trevor was always telling Colin's mom how Colin will be just like this too. Elisa Creevey, during such talks, smiled, nodded and winked at Colin, sometimes mouthing "drama queen", when her brother couldn't see. Colin liked Terry too – trouble or not, he was a good friend, even if he had less and less time over the years to spend with his younger cousins.

The staircase ended in a small room, with a massive on the side wall. Instead of torches, the room was lit by a couple of braziers, that hung along the walls, offering much calmer and comfortable light. Professor McGonagall stopped in front of the doors, turned around, waited until her students gathered around her, and spoke.

'Greetings at Hogwarts. You are about to enter the most prestigious wizarding school in Europe, so I would ask you to behave with dignity, that befits your status as wizards. Once again, my name is professor McGonagall and I am the Deputy Headmistress of this school, which means that any trouble maker or flunker will have himself explained to me.' She adjusted her glasses and looked over the students. 'Am I being understood?'

Satisfied by inharmonious "Yes, professor McGonagall" and "Yes, madam", she spoke again.

'Good. Now, I must leave you here for a second – I will return in a minute or so and we will proceed with your Sorting. I expect discipline and level-headedness in my absence.' With this, professor opened the doors and swiftly went through, closing them behind her. Everyone left in the room loudly exhaled.

Colin found Wayne, who was currently squinting at the painting of a fat man in a purple mantle and a golden crown, and wedged through the crowd in his direction. Luke was already talking to the boy who almost drowned on the harbour, and Ginny was talking to some other girls. Luna was once again in her own world, leaning on the wall near the picture Damian was studying, with a distant smile on her face.

'I saw how he twitched his nose…' whispered Wayne when Colin came closer, not letting his eyes from the painted man. Luna snickered.

'Loderick the Gluttonous, 1489-1543,' read Colin aloud. 'I don't know, seems like he hasn't been twitching in awhile…'

'Ha-ha.' said Wayne without a trace of laughter in his voice, earning another snicker from Luna. 'Just keep in mind, something's up…'

Suddenly, the air in the room grew colder and the fire in the braziers flailed wildly, casting long and troubling shadows on the walls. With a long, loud "OOH!", two humanlike, but almost completely transparent figures swiftly rose from the floor, menacingly hanging above the shivering first years. Some girl shrieked, and…

The fat figure, dressed in loose monk robes, comically grabbed its ears, trying to cover them, lamenting in rather deep voice. 'For the love of all that's Holy, please, make her stop! I'm sorry, I'm sorry, alright?'

The girl, confused, stopped. The portrait of Loderick dropped all pretence and started laughing, loudly and merrily. The fat ghost gave the portrait a glare and slowly descended to the girl's level, his head with a grey bowl-cut bowed in gratitude. 'Thank you, thank you, fair maiden!' The girl, bewildered just like almost everyone else in the room, nodded.

'Warned ya…' managed to squeeze in-between the laughs Loderick.

'Indeed, you did.' agreed the other ghost, dressed in a fashionable for his time ballroom suit, with a camisole and tight pants. On his head was an incredibly complicated mess, that somewhat reminded Colin of a wig he saw a judge wear on TV, if said wig was sent through a washing machine first.

'Hey!' took offence the monk. 'If they were like they should be, this wouldn't happen!' His face fell for a second. 'These kids grow louder each year, huh, Nickie?'

'Indeed, they do…' confirmed the other ghost, also levelling himself on the ground. 'Now, then, children. Do you know who we are?'

'Almost-Headless Nick!' happily shouted Luna from behind Colin's back. The ghost, with a smile on his face, nodded, and slowly rose into the air, where he performed a proper bow, slowly spinning in place. After he straightened up, he scratched his ear for a second, before suddenly pulling on it with full force. With a sickening pop, his head detached from his neck, hanging upside-down on a thin strip of skin. The room gasped, with a couple of slightly uncomfortable chuckles from the more acknowledged students. Colin, who for the last minute was trying to catch both ghosts in the same shot with his trusty camera, gasped too, yet noticed, that Wayne was among the neither group, and was watching the spectacle with an irritated expression on his face.

'I prefer "sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington",' loudly announced the ghost, putting his head in its place. 'But if you are in trouble, or in a hurry,' he smiled kindly, again lowering himself down. '"Almost-Headless Nick" would certainly do. I am the ghost of Gryffindor.'

'Fat Friar.' announced the other ghost, taking a graceful lap of honour across the room, swimming through the air on his back. Colin bit his lip, timed the shot, and squeezed the shutter, grabbing the photocard with a now routine move. He stuffed it into his pocket, far too enchanted in the present company. Fat Friar continued:

'Although you might better know me as… Ah,' he stopped. 'Who am I kidding?' he sighed. 'No one remembers poor Brother Pimbleton these days, do they?'

A short girl with a straight, dark hair, wrinkled her face and suddenly clapped on her forehead. 'You invented butterbeer!'

The Friar's face cleared, and he, with a jolly laughter and tears of joy, ascended to the ceiling. 'They remember! They remember!' he shouted proudly, until he went to another floor, which muffled his screams. Sir Nicholas chuckled.

'Now he won't shut up about it for a year…' He looked at the girl seriously. 'Thank you. He needed this.'

'My father owns his brewery.' shrugged the girl with a smile. The ghost smiled back kindly.

'Best not tell him that, then, young Pevency. Unless, of course, you want him constantly asking how it is doing, down to the most meticulous detail. Anyway,' Almost-Headless Nick looked over the room, 'That was The Fat Friar, the ghost of Hufflepuff. Grey Lady of Ravenclaw and Bloody Baron of Slytherin couldn't come, but you will meet them in due time.' The ghost floated to the doors and shoved his torso through them. 'Aha!' he pulled himself back out. 'Here she comes. Right on time, Minnie, just like always…' He saluted to the students and floated to one of the walls. 'Farewell, children. I will see you at the sorting.'

Just as he left the room, the doors opened wide with a loud BANG! "Minnie", commonly known as Professor McGonagall in this day and age, looked over the students with a strict, yet affectionate smile on her face.

'Is everyone alright?' After seeing the happy faces, she once again turned on her heels, hiding her smile from the students. 'Follow me. Your Sorting will begin now.'

He found the ghosts incredibly lame. Like he, they were given a second chance, a life after death, and what had they been doing with their chance? Scaring first years and begging for attention, that's what. What a bunch of losers… Damian twitched, remembering the way the Almost-Headless Nick popped his head off, and felt like the shivers ran down his spine. Besides their overall lameness, the ghosts made him feel a little bit uneasy – just like graveyards, churches and morgues had been doing in the last year or two. With a frown on his face, he realised that he was starting to brood. Brooding was bad – at least, that's what Grayson and Father said, the latter in "Do what I say, not what I do" kind of tone – but at the moment he no longer cared.

That was troubling… Damian ran a quick analysis of his mental state and cringed at the result. It appeared, that the ghosts were only a part of a problem. Being out of his element, crushing down from the sugar high and being forced to socialize (although, he had to admit, Colin seemed as an interesting character) took a huge toll. The worst thing was the fact, that he missed his Father, missed Grayson and everyone else. Feeling homesick was unworthy of Wayne, unworthy of his legacy, yet he still was. The only thing that could make it even worse, would be if he was forced to listen to poetry. Thankfully, the possibilities of this seemed slim.

The children were clearing the room, following McGonagall, so he sighed and trudged behind them. Colin, of course, was at the head of the column, next to Ginny and her weird friend. To be honest, Luna confused Damian – at times she reminded him far too much of Maps, yet at the next moment she was completely closed off in her shell. Wayne sighed – he'd like to have Todd, or even better, Drake, on this one, but it seemed like he would have to use his own people skills in order to understand what was wrong with her. Said skills were not non-existent – despite whatever Grayson said – but they indeed were mostly theoretical. Damian added Luna to his mental list of curiosities worthy of investigation. Brooding intensified.

The next room was incredibly big, with 7-meter-wide staircase to his left and at least 10-meter-tall gate to his right. A red carpet with a golden ornament lied on the floor, stretching from the gates and going up the stairs. A set of doors – smaller than the gate, but still overcompensating for something – was right in front of him, with one of the leaves being open just enough for a person to walk through.

On the other side of the doors was the Great Hall. Wayne looked around with a modicum of curiosity, taking note of four House tables sitting parallel to each other, the staff table that stood alongside the far wall, and, of course, the ceiling. The illusion of the night sky on the ceiling was remarkably realistic. Damian took a note to check, whether it really showed the sky outside or just mimicked the weather to the best of its abilities.

The students sitting at the House tables were studying the first years with curious looks, yet Damian ignored them for now. He was far more interested in the one of two people sitting behind the staff table. While an upbeat black woman in her early thirties, with a round face and straight long black hair, was to be expected, the other person wasn't. A man with short platinum blond hair, dressed in a beige suit with red accents, sat near the left side of the table, looking around like he owned the world and flashing a smile to the Hall from time to time. Damian bit his lip - if Lockhart was as good as his books told, he could be a problem. Although, Tim, who was in charge of scouring the wizarding books for valuable intel, had some doubts about Lockhart's legitimacy. Wayne sighed and added Lockhart to the list.

'First years, wait here.' said McGonagall before walking straight ahead, in-between Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws, towards the staff table, in front of which stood a chair with some sort of rag on it. Wayne frowned, but then realised, that the rag, most likely, had something to do with the Sorting. Despite easily cracking the Gordian Knot of Ilvermorny, even united efforts of Tim Drake and Stephanie Brown failed to uncover the exact process of Sorting in Hogwarts. Of course, they might have been studying each other instead of the wizarding books… but Father taught Damian to give his family a benefit of a doubt and so he did.

Damian looked over the Hufflepuff table, studying the students sitting at the one beyond it. Soon, his gaze zeroed in on a scrawny figure sitting in-between a freckled, redheaded boy with a long nose and Hermione from the train. Harry Potter – who apparently had some trouble with reaching the school this year, which in and of itself was a valuable data point – didn't seem to change much during the summer, compared to the photograph in the archive copy of Daily Prophet. Currently, the Saviour of the Magical World was sulking, looking straight in front of him, while Hermione and the other boy seemed to be engaged in the shouting match. Alas, due to a loud commotion in the Hall, Damian couldn't hear them. Although, he did notice, that the boy's ears were weirdly red even for a redhead and somewhat swollen. He deemed it curious. Not curious enough to add to the list, but curious still.

'Hey, here you are! I couldn't find you anywhere!' whispered to him Colin. Damian detected the slight shiver of the boy's voice, sighed and turned to his new friend. Right now he couldn't do anything about Potter or the Mission anyway. Might as well try to "be a kid", as Grayson put it. A pity there wasn't an arcade around…

'Hey, here you are! I couldn't find you anywhere!' whispered to his new friend Colin, feeling relieved. The whole "being the centre of attention" thing hadn't been working out for him at all, and at that moment almost everyone in the room was studying the first years. Not to mention, that he was a little unnerved by the sheer size of the room – it could easily fit in the whole house that Colin grew up in at least a couple of times over.

At first he tried to stick to Ginny and Luna, but both of the girls were almost immediately swept by the other girls, and Colin chose to retreat. Luna did not look particularly happy about it and almost looked like she wanted to stop him, but chose her apathy instead. Another time Colin might have stayed and tried to cheer her up, but the prospect of spending his time with a dozen of girls was something he'd rather pass. When the girls bundled together, even the better ones became way too much… "yuck". Yes, "yuck" was the right word. Besides, by that point he had already noticed his companion, who was studying the room with the same squint he offered the portrait of Loderick.

At the sound of his voice, Wayne turned around and offered Colin a small, pained smile. Colin, seeing that he wasn't the only one unnerved, smiled back and looked up, studying the night sky. He had already snapped a picture of the Great Hall, and now was just marvelling in its beauty. Floating candles, that lit up the room, gave the sight a truly surreal feel, but Colin felt like he had already used all his ability of feeling astonished today. Although, it didn't mean, that he couldn't appreciate what he saw.

The door behind the staff table opened up, and a number of wizards and witches walked in, taking their places behind the table. Colin's eyes were locked on Dumbledore, full of admiration. According to the book he bought in Diagon Alley, he was currently looking at the biggest hero of the past age, who was going to share his wisdom and experience with all of them. Colin was a little disappointed to find out, that the Hero was wearing a violet shiny mantle with golden stars and a pointy cap with the same ornaments, but he was willing to forgive an old man the lack of taste. Not to mention, that there was another Hero in this very room – a Hero of Colin's generation, Hero that saved the whole Britain from the evil monster and allowed a poor kid from North Ockendon to become a wizard. In other words, Colin couldn't wait to meet Harry Potter.

The other professors were far less of note. A tall, old man was walking with a cane he held in a wooden arm shaped like a claw, next to an incredibly short brown-haired man in a dress-coat, who was sporting a majestic moustache. Professor Sprout, whom Colin knew, since it was she who brought him a letter from Hogwarts, was engaged in an animated discussion with a dark-haired, shrivelled man dressed in all black. The last was a copper-haired young woman, dressed in dark-blue robes. This woman sat to the left of the woman in black and whispered something in her ear, which caused them both to laugh.

Professor Dumbledore took his place in the middle of the table, rose his goblet and struck it with his fork, producing a clean, loud sound. All discussion and other noises immediately died down. Satisfied, professor smiled and made a gesture to professor McGonagall. She slightly tapped the grey rag on the chair with her wand. The rag immediately perked up, assuming a form of a tall, crumbled cap. For a second Colin thought that the shadows from the candles had formed a primitive face on the cap, but the next second the cap leaned forward, and Colin realised that it, in fact, had a face. And then the cap started to sing. Or, quickly corrected himself Colin, more like chant.

It can really be quite a pain,

To be just a hat with a brain.

I sit in the tower,

and, hour by hour,

I think how I could entertain.

Colin smiled. Limericks were usually a rather shameful art, and many poets considered them a faux-pass, but he happened to like them. Maybe exactly because he wasn't a poet. He found, that there was something attractive in their simplicity. Although, judging by the groan from his left, Damian did not share this passion of his. The Hat, though, continued unfazed.

Though I've lived through the time of Shakespeare,

Sometimes I just can't get into gear.

The song just won't come;

Like my tongue has gone numb;

So I ask my friend Dumbledore here.

Aforementioned professor rose his eyebrows in curiosity and smiled, leaning forward and listening to every word.

He always has some good advice;

It usually makes me think twice,

And it sticks in my head;

But this time he just said,

"I often think limericks are nice."

Dumbledore proudly nodded, causing a number of chuckles among the students. Professor McGonagall shook her head and pursed her lips, yet said nothing.

Now something in my head went *chime*

I began coming up with this rhyme.

I realized too late,

he was quite off his pate.

He had been fast asleep at the time!

Dumbledore gasped in mocked offence, transforming chuckles into laughs. Professor Sprout grinned and winked at professor McGonagall, who hung her head in defeat.

I suppose I must just go along,

And sing this ridiculous song.

As long as it tells

Of the house where you'll dwell

I guess it's not really that wrong.

If the reason you'd like to see Rome

Is to stare at some rare obscure tome,

If the books you live for

Seem to make others snore,

Then Ravenclaw's surely your home.

The table with blue decorations laughed the most at this dig, although the rest of the school was also happy to chuckle at studious Ravenclaws.

And whether it be lion's roar,

Or worse, a professor's low score,

If you face up to all

And you're still standing tall,

Then I will name you Gryffindor.

A couple of students behind the Gryffindor table proudly puffed their chests, but then realised the subtle attack in the verse and deflated.

If you want all the power you can take,

Suspect friends of stealing your cake,

And if you aspire

To learn black magic dire,

Then a great Slytherin you will make.

The Slytherin table took the onslaught gallantly – a tall, dark boy, who had started to rise to disprove all arguments, was immediately dragged down by his Prefect and force-fed a whole pinch of Berty Botts by his other neighbour, which took him out of commission.

Those of you who don't think that you've got

What it takes to be part of this lot,

Hufflepuff's always fair;

All you need to get there

Is to work hard, or have you forgot?

Hufflepuffs, who started to frown at the beginning of the verse, erupted in laughter at the final line. The Cap took a deep breath and finished the song:

So sit down and put me on tight.

Don't worry, you won't get a fright.

I will just pick your mind

'Till I find out your kind,

And tell you where you will fit right.

The song ended and nearly everyone in the Hall started to applaud. Some students shrivelled their noses and attempted to explain to their peers why exactly the limericks were bad (with a majority of such critics located behind the Slytherin table), but most students seemed to like song. Colin, smiling, joined the ovation – he felt like he found his people.

The Cap bowed to all of the four tables and finally stood in attention. Professor McGonagall cleared her throat, turned towards the first years and started talking.

'Quiet!' All noises died down once again. 'Now, I will start calling out names. Upon hearing yours, you are to walk towards the Sorting Hat, pick it up, sit on the chair and put it on. The Hat will decide the most suitable House for you and announce it both to you and the Hall. Upon hearing it, you are to stand up, place the Hat on the chair and join your new House. Your Prefects will take care of you from that point. Am I being clear?'

The first years, once again being the centre of attention, nodded in disorder. McGonagall smiled.

'Then, let us begin the Sorting.' she procured a roll of parchment from the staff table, adjusted her spectacles and called out the first name. 'Alavi, Hakim!'

The boy that almost fell in the water in the boathouse smiled and took a step forward. Luke, who was standing close to him, clapped him on the back, and Hakim clapped him back before continuing his walk. Upon reaching the Sorting Hat, Hakim proudly placed it on his head with a smile on his face.

The second the Hat touched his head, the smile was gone. Holding their breaths, students of Hogwarts waited for the first Sorting of the year. With each passing moment Hakim grew sadder, until…

'Slytherin!' proudly announced the Hat. The green table started to applaud and Hakim jumped down from the chair, placed the Hat back on it, and walked to his cheering new comrades, holding his head up high and hiding tears in the corners of his eyes.

'Brooks, Victoria' called out professor McGonagall.

A pale, brown-haired girl with freckles – the one that screamed at the Fat Friar – quickly walked to the chair and hastily put the Hat on her head. A moment later the Hat announced, 'Hufflepuff!' With a huge smile on her face, the girl ran up to the "yellow" table, which congratulated her with a standing ovation.

'Creevey, Colin!'

The time slowed down. Colin gasped for air, yet it wouldn't come. He took a small, uncertain step forward and froze again, looking like a deer in the headlights.

'Come on, go!' whispered Wayne, shoving him forward a little. Colin mechanically nodded and walked to the chair, taking the Hat from it and putting it on. And suddenly everything went quiet.

'Ho, ho, ho…' said the voice in his head. Colin twitched.

'G-good evening, Mr. Hat?' he said. And yet his lips didn't move, the words sounded in his ears. The voice chuckled.

'Good evening? What do you mean, good evening? Do you mean…'

'All of the above.' quickly interrupted Colin with a smile. The voice hummed.

'Yes, I suppose we do not have the time… Let me be frank, mister Creevey – you have a perfect fit. Yearning for friendship, for belonging, you will find yourself right at home among the Hufflepuffs…'

Colin stubbornly bit his lip. The voice took note of it. 'Ah, yes. Gryffindor. Harry Potter. You are no hero, mister Creevey…' the voice stopped and hummed once again, 'But you might be, yes, you might… Your bravery may be few and far between, but it is there indeed. Yet it won't be easy, let me assure you of that.'

'Nothing ever is.' whispered Colin. The voice laughed.

'No, it isn't. Alright, then.' The voice stopped, and suddenly the sounds came back.

The hat on top of Colin's head proudly announced "Gryffindor!", and the table with the red decorations welcomed him with a round of applause. Damian smiled, watching his friend run towards his new House, yet frowned a second later. During the trainride, he pegged Colin as a Hufflepuff. He was missing something.

Professor McGonagall kept calling out names, yet Damian paid little attention to them. Colin was seated not far from Potter and his friends and Damian wondered if he knew what Potter looked like. Judging by the fact that Colin was still conscious, it was unlikely.

'Lovegood, Luna!' announced professor McGonagall and Wayne shook the thoughts off. This one was important, if he was going to get into Luna's head and see what made her tick. The girl, with the same distant stare, slowly walked to the chair and placed the Hat on her head. Suddenly, she smiled.

'Ravenclaw!' announced the Hat after a moment of thought. Luna quickly took it off and ran up the eagles' table. Somebody offered her a place, but she, still smiling, shook her head and chose to seat alone, far from the rest. Wayne blinked – that would be a place he'd choose. With each observation, he more and more noticed, that Luna seemed to be a weird hybrid of his and Maps's personalities. His frown deepened – just like his Father, he didn't consider himself completely sane, and seeing similar patterns on someone else, someone who reminded him of a close friend, made him uneasy. He would deal with it later, though – he felt completely wasted, and he still had a couple of challenges ahead.

Norbert, Lucas joined Slytherin, Tina Pevency went to Gryffindor and soon there was only a handful of first-years left. Ginny, who previously kept her composure just fine, started losing it the moment McGonagall reached the letter "T" and Torkind, Wesley went to Ravenclaw. The girl still stood tall, but she bit her lip hard, hyperventilating and looking at the chair with unease.

Wayne wasn't feeling all that well himself. Previous calculations for this mission were based on the House qualities that were described in the study books, yet Colin had already thrown all of them out of the window. He rose his eyes at the large, a little fat boy who was currently occupying the chair. He wondered how the Hat decided on the House. Did it read people's minds? If yes – could he prevent it from happening with his?

'Gryffindor!' loudly announced the Hat and the boy walked to his table with a smug smile on his face.

'Wayne, Damian!' said McGonagall and Damian took a deep breath. Showtime.

In a swift, even pace he walked to the chair, picked up the Hat and placed it on his head. Everything around went silent. The boy frowned – telepathy it was. This was going to be fun.

'Wow.' said a voice in his head. It was deep and just a little bit rough. 'And to think, that I thought, that I had already seen everything.'

Damian cursed. The voice laughed.

'Do not worry, mister Wayne, your secrets are safe with me. Although, I must admit, this is the first time I sort somebody sent to infiltrate Hogwarts.'

Damian shrugged. 'I am here to study, too.'

'Yes, yes, magic does seem like a great advantage in your line of work…' said the voice. 'I am sorry for what was done to you. And while I do not approve… I understand.'

'Thank you.' answered Wayne, pursing his lips. 'Can we get on with the Sorting?'

'Yes, yes, although there isn't much to sort, is there? You are here for knowledge, after all.'

Damian smiled. Despite a talking, thinking hat, the plan was back on the rails.

'Before we are done, mister Wayne…' said the aforementioned cap. 'I want you to know, that the requirements for the houses are more of a guidelines and there are loopholes in them. While you may be a suitable fit, there were students today, who tried to use such loopholes to get into a house they should rather avoid. And I could not stop everyone.'

Wayne cursed again, summoning a picture of Colin in his mind.

'I cannot tell who exactly.' sadly answered the Hat. 'But since you are going to have a little easier time here, due to your unnatural abilities…' the Hat paused for a second, 'I would like you to keep an eye on those stray souls. Their stubbornness and dedication, while admirable, might lead them to a bitter end.'

Damian mulled over this. He understood non-belonging – something that he felt a lot when he first came to Gotham. And while he made it his home eventually, he had to agree that he'd never be able to do this without Father, Alfred, or Grayson. Even Brown and Drake played their parts. Slowly, he nodded.

'If it won't compromise the Mission.'

'Yes, of course.' agreed the Hat. 'As for your mission… I am bound by the same rule… But he was here and I sat atop his head. A near perfect fit, that one was…'

'Thank you.' whispered Wayne. That was an incredibly valuable, even if incomplete, piece of intel.

'No, thank you. I wish you success, mister Wayne. And now, you would do well to join…'

'Ravenclaw!'

Colin frowned. Of course, he did not expect that his new friend would become his housemate… but he certainly hoped for it. Still, that didn't mean that they couldn't be friends. Not to mention, that Luke was in Gryffindor too, which meant he wasn't completely alone.

Colin watched as Damian, at the same brisk pace, walked to the Ravenclaw table. Luna asked him something as he walked by her, and he seemed to answer, but Colin didn't see what happened next, because McGonagall called out "Weasely, Ginevra", and the Gryffindor table visibly tensed up.

The girl took a slow and uncertain step forward and unsurely looked at the Gryffindor table. Redheaded twins, who sat at the head of the table, smiled at her and made a welcoming gesture, before mouthing something to her. Colin did not know what they were going for, but it seemed to enrage Ginny, who furiously strolled towards the chair, grabbed the Hat and put it on.

The silence was damning. A couple of seats to the left from Colin, redheaded boy, who had been arguing in whispers with the girl that was looking for her friends on the train, now was watching the Sorting with an unblinking stare, biting his lip so hard, that Colin thought it might start bleeding soon. Percy Weasely, the Prefect of Gryffindor, who personally congratulated every new student in his house, sat unnaturally stiff, drumming his fingers on the table. Finally, the Hat gave its verdict.

'Gryffindor!'

Ginny, with a bright smile, grabbed the Hat from her head, gave it professor McGonagall and ran up to Percy, who immediately grabbed her in embrace. After she got out of it, Ginny was almost immediately clapped on her back by the twins, and soon sat just across the redheaded boy that was so worried for her. The girl from the train – Hermione, finally remembered Colin – started quickly whispering to Ginny, sometimes pointing at both her brother and the thin dark haired boy with round glasses that was sitting between them.

Professor McGonagall removed the chair with a flick of her wand and carried the Hat to a small pedestal in the corner of the room. After setting it there, she started walking to her place at the staff table, but Colin was once again distracted.

'They what?!' loudly gasped Ginny, frantically looking around the table. Some of the people gave her somber nods, which didn't help her composure at all. 'Ron…' Ginny, furious, stared at her youngest brother, and Colin realised that she had tears in her eyes. 'How could you?'

'Gin…' started the redheaded boy, raising his hands.

'Do not "Gin" me, Ronald!" she snapped at him. 'Do you… do you even understand what could happen to Dad? To you? To…' she looked to her brother's neighbour and fell silent.

'Ginny, please.' quietly said the dark-haired boy. 'We screwed up. We know that. We've been hearing this for the last hour…'

Ginny, completely red, deflated. 'S-sorry.'

Hermione, who had been glaring at her friends, pursed her lips. 'I hope you don't think you can deal with me that easily, Harry.' The boy cringed, but nodded to her.

Colin's eyes widened. Was this… was this Harry Potter? The legendary wizard, who defeated the Dark Lord? It seemed, like today was a day to be disappointed in the visual images of his heroes. Still… Colin touched the camera bag with a smile. He was going to get this picture. He already was in the same House as Harry Potter. How cool was that?

Professor Dumbledore at the staff table stood up and once again hit the goblet. The silence once again took over the Great Hall. Dumbledore smiled and cleared his throat.

'Welcome! Welcome to the new year at Hogwarts! Now…' he paused, 'now would be the time for me to offer you some words of wisdom…'

Some students chuckled. Colin didn't get why. Dumbledore continued.

'…but it seems I am fresh out. Instead, let me introduce our new teacher of Defence Against the Dark Arts at Hogwarts – an adventurer, novelist and gentleman, cavalier of the Order of Merlin, third class, honorary member of the Dark Force Defence League and simply a hero – Gilderoy Lockhart.'

The Hall erupted in applause. Lockhart – who turned out to be that fancy-dressed blonde guy – stood up and bowed to the Hall.

'Thank you, thank you, Albus… Although you forgot to mention, that I am also a five-time winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award!' said Lockhart with a wink. Some students laughed, and he had to wait until it died down. 'I am glad to be in Hogwarts once again. It will be a great honour, and a great opportunity for me to share my knowledge, my life, with so many young minds. I cannot wait to begin! I will see you all in my class, but, for now, let us listen to what else our Headmaster has to say!'

Lockhart sat back down and returned to his conversation with professor Sprout. Dumbledore chuckled.

'In fact, dear Gilderoy, I may not be able to say much. Except only for,' Headmaster smiled, 'tuck in!'

At the very second he said that, the tables, which previously had been empty, became full of food. Colin, who finally lost all ability to be even surprised, picked up a fork and poked the nearby roasted chicken. The chicken felt normal, so he cut himself a wing, placed some mashed potatoes on his plate and followed the advice of the Headmaster. To his left, Hermione continued her one-girl-assault on Harry Potter and Ronald Weasely, both of whom seemed to be completely focused on the eating. And at the Hufflepuff table, a second-year boy was looking at Damian Wayne with an astonished expression on his face.

Hello again!

First of all, let me thank you all for your feedback! Unfortunately, FFN crapped out and I can only read reviews in the email, but the sheer fact, that four people took time to read the first chapter and then review it is invigorating to me. Once the review system is up, I'll start responding to them properly, but for now you'll have to bear with replies in ANs. Sorry, I promise I'll try to keep it to a minimum!

Some points from reviews I'd like to raise:

Keeperofhounds: Goliath may appear in the flashbacks or bonus chapters, but you shouldn't wait for him in the main story this year. I also love him, but he is going to be a distraction right now. Justice League does not exist on this world at all, although Bruce keeps contact with some other street level vigilantes. Like Goliath, they will not appear this year.

TheUnfamiliarFamiliar: Yes, I studied mostly American English. I try to use British slang, but my knowledge of it can be compared with Damian's people skills. If someone could Britpick my writing - that'd great.

Nobodez and Snowflakeofdoom: Thank you for your kind words!

Now, about the chapter. I tried very hard not to turn it into a slow drag, because everyone in HP fandom had seen the Sorting one too many times already. I hope that I managed to spice it and the boatride with enough fun things, but overall I was just trying to push through the Feast, so that we can get to the actual plot. While the actual antagonist won't strike for awhile, Damian vs Lockhart in the next few chapters is going to be fun.

I also tried to give each of my protagonists a unique voice. Still not sure if I succeeded. I'll try to improve on it in the future. As for why they are in different Houses... Frankly speaking, Damian in Gryffindor is an equivalent of Colin in Slytherin. He won't fit. Not to mention, that he would thwart Riddle's plans far too quick, before good old Tom is able to gather his strength.

There's also a reason why this update is so soon. I will be unable to post on Saturday, like I originally planned, so I am switching things around a bit. I hope Tuesdays work for you too!

Once again, thank you everyone, who reviewed, followed or favourited Chapter 1. While I am not going to beg for reviews or keep new chapters hostages, reading other people's opinions on this fic really helps me write, so, if it is not too much of a bother - please, send me your opinions on what you just read.

With love, farfromrefuge.