Hello readers, I am still overwhelmed with the positive response IDNNH has been receiving! I do try and update as often as I can, but I am very busy with school. A few people have asked me when there will be MerDer scenes. Derek will be introduced soon, but do not expect any fluffy or happy MerDer scenes for a while. They will end up together but they have a lot to get through first.

TRIGGER WARNING: For mentions of miscarriage and discussion of fetal loss during this chapter. This occurs during a flashback and the scene is in italics if you believe this may upset you, please skip this chapter or the section in italics.

Flying to Boston nearly seven years ago had been stressful, yes, but Meredith had been by herself. The flight had been over six hours long, and she'd had horrible morning sickness that morning. It was so bad that the man with the aisle seat offered it to her so she could rush to the bathroom more easily. Back then, the hadn't known she'd be making the return flight with six-year-old twins.

Logan International Airport was large, crowded, and overall confusing and her boys wanted to explore. Every. Single. Inch. Before Meredith had even payed the cab driver upon their arrival, Evan and Zach were already trying to climb the concrete pillars in front of the entrance. She had gotten the twins to the ticket counter, but Evan had gotten very upset when they tried to take his bag as he was convinced an "airplane" robber would come and steal it. Once Meredith had opened his bag and pulled out his special blanket and his favorite Red Sox hat, he had been willing to hand it over, and they three finally made it to the security check point.

Meredith couldn't believe how fast they day of their departure had come up. Richard had been very willing to give Meredith back her residency position, even though she only had to finish one more year. She had no idea who her fellow residents would be. She'd had to take quite a lot of time off after she'd had Zach and Evan to recover. Their birth hadn't been at all easy on her body and her healing process took a backseat to the needs of her two newborns. She'd also found an elementary school that would take her boys, and had informed Izzie and Alex that she was going to be coming home. Alex had volunteered to move to the attic, knowing it would be quieter, and Izzie had cleaned up Meredith's old room and the boys' new room for them.

Now the only thing left to do was to actually get there. The security line was crawling and her six-year-olds were having trouble standing still when there was so much excitement going on around them, never mind all the looks they got. Meredith was never one to intentionally dress them alike, but she often bought two of everything to avoid fighting. If Zach got a dinosaur shirt and Evan didn't get the same one, it wouldn't be a pleasant scene. If Evan got a plain, boring, basic pair of white socks, Zach would be angry that he didn't get socks too. However, this morning, both of them had come out in a similar pair of jeans and identical airplane t-shirts.

They got stares normally, something about identical twins was more intriguing than Meredith understood, but dressed alike it was much worse. "Oh my goodness, look at all of those curls! They're twins aren't they?" An older woman behind Meredith cooed. She smiled stiffly.

"Yeah, they are," she answered politely. She was already stressed out enough without having to have the same conversation she'd had since the boys were born with yet another person. She was watching them closely, and they were beginning to drift further and further away from her. "Hey! Zachary, Evan, you boys stay here!"

They were playing a game that she'd seen them play before, but she never quite understood the rules to. It seemed like they were preforming something half trauma surgery and half flying a fighter jet. The continued to play this game all through the line, but stopped in front of the metal detectors.

"Mommy, is that a spaceship?" Evan asked curiously, eyeing the huge metal machine. Meredith laughed for the first time that day. All the stress of flying was getting to her, but her boys always managed to make it better.

"No Ev, it's a metal detector. You have to go through it to make sure you don't have anything in your pockets that is not allowed on the airplane." She smiled as she watched her sons stare at it in awe. They looked almost exactly like their father, but at least their eyes were her shade of blue-grey. They had her frame too, they probably weighed less than 90lbs between them, but they were a little taller than average as well, making finding clothes for them difficult.

The boys pulled their matching pairs of sneakers off when asked and put them in the little plastic bin provided, talking excitedly about the rolling belt that moved the bin along. "Oh, aren't they precious! Are they twins?" Meredith protectively grabbed the twins' hands and looked around for the voice. It was yet another woman, this time in her mid-forties.

"Yes, they are," Meredith said, before turning back to help each of her sons through the metal detectors. She passed through herself, then grabbed their shoes and bags, guiding the boys to a bench so they could all sit and put their shoes back on. They both had worn their black canvas shoes, but Meredith knew Zach's shoes had dirtier laces as he wouldn't take them off when walking through mud at the park like Evan would.

After a quick trip to the bathrooms, a lunch consisting of dry sandwich wraps and juice boxes, and a half hour spent on the moving walkways at the boys' request, the Greys finally arrived at their gate A13. Meredith pulled out the Nintendo handhelds she'd gotten for them for their sixth birthday two months ago and handed them to Zach and Evan's eager hands.

Meredith pulled out her phone so she could call Alex to tell him they were going to be flying out in a half an hour, but Zach distracted her. "Mommy, can you tell Evan that I get to be Yoshi? I am always Yoshi and he's trying to be him. He's my guy!" Evan made a face.

"No. Zach always wins when he has Yoshi and it's not fair! I want to be Yoshi this time! Zach is mean and he never ever shares!" Meredith put her finger over her lips, signaling both boys to quiet down.

"How about neither of you use Yoshi for the first round, and whoever wins gets Yoshi first. Then you have to trade." The boys agreed and went back to excitedly playing their game. Meredith had become a professional mediator in the past few years, and it came in handy often. She dialed Alex's number, relieved when he picked up.

"Hi Alex, we're at the airport right now. I think we'll be there around 9pm, so can you be at the airport by then to pick us up?" Meredith asked him. She could hear Alex laughing a little and raised an eyebrow. "What's so funny?"

"Iz, George, and I are picturing you sitting in a crowded airport gate while your kids are running around in circles all around the place," he admitted, still laughing. "They're both here right now, Iz and George are on call, but they're really hoping they don't get called in."

"I'm excited to see my nephews in person!" Izzie called from the background. Meredith smiled a little. She was pretty excited to see her friends again, even if that meant she might cross paths with Derek and Addison every once and a while.

"They…they look a lot like him," Meredith admitted. "Both of them have the hair." She looked over at the twins, who were still engrossed in their game. They both needed a haircut, especially Zach, as his hair had a tendency to fall over his eyes. "They're identical. I don't know if I ever told you that. Evan's got a Red Sox hat on. Just so you know, they both hate it when you call them by the wrong names."

"If they look that much alike you might as well just glue a hat to his head. Not the Sox one though, I've got a spare Mariners hat around here somewhere." Alex mused.

"Good luck with that one. At their end of year tee-ball team party their coach had on a Red Sox games, and now it's all Sox everything." Meredith said, stifling a laugh when both boys perked their ears up upon hearing the name of their favorite team. Suddenly, she heard the first boardings being called. "Alex, I have to go. Remember, 9pm."

"9pm," Alex verified, "good luck with the flight." Meredith thanked him and put her phone away, checking their tickets again to see when they were supposed to be boarding. As soon as their row was called, Zach and Evan bounced excitedly to the gate, Meredith not far behind.

The boys were thrilled to see the inside of the plane, and Meredith had to explain that they couldn't sit in the big seats of front because they already had assigned seats. She herded them towards the back of the plane, and explained that, as it was Zach's turn to be first, he got the window seat for half the flight, then they would switch. Zach eagerly climbed into the seat, Evan took the middle, and Meredith took the aisle seat.

She had to help them buckle in, as they never seen the type of seatbelts they were now faced with. Zach took a deep breath in and blew it out on the window so he could draw a smiley face, while Evan pulled down the trey and put it back up again several times. Even if they were both a bit tall for six year olds, neither of them could touch the ground with their feet.

She'd always seen airplane seats as being small, but now, noticing Zach only took up half of the seat and the very top of Evan's head didn't even reach the headrest, they seemed a lot bigger. They had never been on a plane before, at least not as two fully developed people. She didn't count her flight to Boston, as she'd only been two months pregnant.

She'd already been showing enough that people had noticed. For the first few weeks she'd convinced herself it was food poisoning and that whatever she was reacting to was causing bloating. It had been Cristina who had suggested she take a pregnancy test after a week of finding her retching in the bathroom between rounds multiple times a day. Looking back, it made since that she'd been so sick, mothers carrying twins often had more severe morning sickness, but at the time she'd been scared and confused.

Her whole pregnancy had been scary, especially the day she had found out it was twins.

"Meredith Grey?" Meredith looked up from her hands, which had been gripping her book so tightly that her knuckles were white. She hadn't even opened it. She stood up shakily and followed her doctor into a room.

It was painted rather brightly, and there were tons of posters on the wall of various stages of fetal development. The doctor gestured to the table and asked Meredith to sit down. She stumbled a little, but managed to sit down without actually falling. For the first time in a while, she wished she wasn't all alone. If she'd stayed in Seattle, Izzie would have come with her, maybe even Derek. She pushed the thought away. She was not going to think about Derek right now.

"You're here today for a 14-week scan, is that correct?" Meredith nodded, her head a little bit fuzzy. She hadn't slept well and she'd had horrible morning sickness earlier that she still hadn't quite shaken. "Have you been in for a scan yet?" Meredith shook her head. In between trying to keep up with her new job at Mass General and spending her time sleeping next to the toilet, she'd had a hard time finding somewhere to get the ultrasound done. It had been even harder to find an appointment time that worked. "Have you been taking prenatal vitamins?"

"I've been, uh, I've been taking samples until I could get in," she admitted. She watched nervously as the ultrasound technician set up the equipment, pulling up her shirt a little to allow the technician to pour the gel onto her bare skin. It was surreal. She'd spent hours starting at herself in the mirror, trying to gauge how much bigger she looked each day, but it all become more real when she felt the cool gel. She squirmed a little uncomfortably.

"So, we're going to find the baby first, and then you'll be able to hear the heartbeat," she informed her. Meredith was shaking a little. She was going to see her baby now; it was all about to become real. As soon as the screen flicked on, she paled.

"There's two babies in there," she said, beginning to panic. "Oh my God, there's two." She couldn't do anything but just stare at the screen in shock for a moment, before another, more important thought came to her.

"Are they okay in there? Do they look healthy?" She was frantic, panicked, looking wide eyed at the doctor. She didn't know too much about reading prenatal ultrasounds. She had seen ultrasounds before in pre-op to assess risks and complications, but she'd been told whether or not those ultrasounds were abnormal.

"Ms. Grey, they look healthy, about 14 weeks, like you guessed, but I'm going to have to refer you to a specialist. They share a placenta, and that always increases the risk of complications including…"

"Twin to twin transfusion syndrome," Meredith interrupted, voice almost a whisper. "They look about the same size to you though, right? I think they do but I'm panicking right now and I don't trust myself." The doctor was still moving around, looking for something, though Meredith didn't know what.

"I don't see a membrane separating the fetuses, so I'm going to need you to see a specialist within the week. I can give you a few names for specialists in the area, but Ms. Grey, you have to schedule an appointment right when you leave. They may find a membrane, and I hope they do, because monoamniotic twins are very high risk. Even with the help of a specialist, there is still a fairly high chance that they won't survive to term."

"What do you mean there's a high chance they won't survive to term?" Meredith asked, her voice breaking. She couldn't not cry. Nothing she did was going to stop it. She just curled up and completely broke down, because her babies could die. There was a high chance that they could die and then she'd been in Boston all alone in an apartment full of all of the baby supplies she'd been stocking up on.

"With biweekly monitoring before 24 weeks, followed by admission into a hospital for 24-hour care, there's about a fifty percent fetal mortality rate. I can't one hundred percent confirm they are monoamniotic, and I'm not trying to scare you, but this is information to need to know."

"Can I at least hear their heartbeats? If they might…if they might die can I at least hear them now?" Meredith asked desperately. The doctor nodded, put something in place and then she could hear them. Two heartbeats, a familiar and comforting wub wub wub that managed to calm her down just a little. They sounded strong.

"I need to number to the best specialist in the state. I'm going to do whatever I need to to have these babies alive."

The rumble of the plane alerted Meredith to the fact they were likely taxiing before take-off. She looked over at her boys. Evan was leaning back, trying to look out the window and see around his twin brother, who seemed considerably less impressed.

"Mommy, I want to go back to the airport. I don't like this airplane I think it's broken!" Zach was crying and Meredith took his hand tightly. The plane stopped, obviously waiting in line for the runway to clear. She quickly got the boys to switch seats and buckled them back in, so Evan could see and she could comfort her little boy. She put an arm around him and kissed his head.

"It's going to be a little loud for a while, and the plane is going to shake a little when it takes off, but once we get in the sky you'll be just fine okay?" She pulled out a stick of gum, giving one to Evan. "Chew this okay? Keep chewing, it'll help you feel a bit better once the plane starts to pressurize." She hoped it would help his ears pop less. Zach squeezed her hand tightly when the plane jolted under them and began to speed down the run way. He began to cry louder and Meredith knew people were staring, but she didn't care.

"Shhh, hey, it's okay Zach. I've got you. Nothing bad is going to happen to you. You're safe, and you're loved," she whispered to him, rubbing his back gently. She grabbed an airsick bag with her free hand and handed it to him. "Zach, I'm going to hold this up to your face okay? When I do that I want to breathe in and out when I do." Zach nodded quickly and Meredith held the bag up for him, taking slow deep breaths for him to follow. He followed along for two, but then the plane lifted off and he began to breathe too quickly again. He was choking on his own breaths. Meredith patted his back.

"Zach, come on. You need to breathe with me. I'm going to count to three okay? One, two, three." Zach was able to follow her breathing and she could see him begin to relax before she could hear him trying to speak through the bag. She took it away from his mouth and he looked up at her helplessly.

"My ears hurt," he whimpered. Meredith gave him a piece of gum as well, now that his breathing had stabilized. She told tell Evan was having the same problem due to his expression.

"Keeping chewing, it'll help your ears," she told them. She hated seeing them in pain. Evan's eyebrow was furrowed and his hands were clamped over his ears tightly. She rubbed his shoulder comfortingly.

Luckily, as the flight went on, the boys grew a little more accustomed to the change in air pressure. By the time the snack cart came around, even Zach had forgotten his earlier reservations in favor of being able to get a little glass of Sprite and some pretzels. The only problem was, after about three hours, by which time Meredith had cut them off of their endless flow of Sprite, they started to ask for water out of boredom.

They would ask for a refill every half an hour when the cart came around again, and soon Meredith was apologizing to every single person they jostled on their trips to the bathroom, and there were a lot of them. Zach would tell her he had to go, and she wasn't going to leave Evan alone, so she'd bring them both to the bathroom. Evan would claim he didn't have to go, so they'd go back to their seats and five minutes later, Evan would decide he had to go after all.

Luckily, after about four and a half hours, they both fell asleep while watching on inflight movie. Unluckily, Meredith realized she needed to use the bathroom and she had to wake them back up so they could all go together.

Zach had freaked out again during the landing, and she'd had to make him spit out his gum so he wouldn't choke on it while she helped him ride out his panic attack. So by the time they finally made it off the plane and to the baggage check, Meredith was exhausted. Even the boys were drooping a little. The moving truck wasn't going to be there for another three days, so she was going to have to share her bed with the twins until she got some bedding for Alex's old bed. She'd done this before, especially during storms, but she knew that all three of them snored, and it wasn't going to be pleasant. Zach was a kicker and Evan was a blanket hog.

They made their way to the car bay, and there was Alex. Izzie was next to him, and George was there too. Meredith didn't even stop to wonder how they had all managed to be there at once, but she was too grateful to care. She rushed up to her friends, Zach and Evan shyly holding onto her hands. She hugged all three of them tightly, then smiled brightly.

"Alex, George and Izzie, meet Zachary and Evan Grey," Meredith said breathlessly.

And thus the Greys are back in Seattle. The positive response IDNNAH has been receiving is amazing to me, and it never ceases to make me smile when a get an email notification that someone has followed, favorited, or reviewed my latest chapter. I would defiantly appreciate any comments, positive, constructive or otherwise!

+ Special shout-out to Jackiiiieeee111, Pat, Kate and Patsy for reviewing both of the previous chapters.