CHAPTER THREE:

Gou couldn't recall the days without being by his side. It was only meant to be just for a few weeks. But those weeks turned to months and somehow it soon didn't feel the same without the man by her side. The young red head closed her eyes and she leaned back and let her red hair loose and it whipped wildly with the wind. The air was filled with her laughter as the boat continued to sail at high speeds as the man beside her just smiled.

After taking lessons (without any help from Nagisa) the man was able to get use to steering the dinghy sail boat. As much he enjoyed sailing at fast speeds with high winds, nothing felt as good as being in the water itself and letting himself get carried away within its currents.

His mind began to space out. It had now been four months since the whole incident occurred and nothing had been fixed between him and his husband. Haru could remember waking up in the morning in the guest room as a normal thing now compared to waking up beside Rin. He missed his tender arms wrapped around him during the nights and how beautiful his long red hair would lie on the pillows.

But as much he missed his hugs and kisses he just couldn't remove the image of his betrayal. Everyone made mistakes and there was nothing wrong with giving him a second chance…and then suddenly his eyes gazed on the woman he was with. Her red ruby eyes stuck on the view ahead as they traveled around the outskirts of the island.

Gou never gave another chance for Makoto to make up to her so should he do the same with Rin? Haru shook the thought away. He was married to Rin while she was engaged. There was a big difference with that. It wasn't as simple to call it quits with someone you're married with than someone you have been dating with.

"Hey Gou?"

Haru's voice broke the silence as Gou turned to her brother in law.

"What's up Haru?"

Haru looked at the woman before looking up ahead and saw more of the beach; it was less crowed than the main one.

As he steered towards the empty beach, "Why didn't you give another chance for Makoto to make it up to you?"

Gou's face went pale. It had been such a long time since she had heard the man's name. Gou took in her time with her answer as she looked away and focused on the beach they were heading towards.

As they reached the island, Gou's lips began to move.

"It just felt right."

The boat finally stopped as it hit the sand. Still silent Haru got off first as he pushed the dinghy boat more until it was stuck and stable enough as he looked at Gou and saw she had gotten off as well. Taking a seat by the ocean Gou watched as Haruka fell backwards into the water before rising up again seconds later. His hair wet as his mind was lost in thoughts once again.

"Just what are you up to Haru?" Gou's words were soft and quiet. "Is it really that bad that there is no way to make it up with my brother?"

Gou caught a glance of Haru looking at her before slowly looking back at the ocean ahead of them both. Gou was puzzled at why Haru was looking at her in such a way. Was it because she looked so much like her brother?

"Are you giving up on him?" She asked.

Her voice brought him back as he glanced over his shoulder.

"Should I?"

Quiet at first, Gou sighed as she dipped her feet into the cold waters of the ocean. She leaned back and looked up at the sky.

"You're married to the man, not me."

Haru sighed and let his body float above the surface of the water and closed his eyes.

"You have a point."

"I'm sorry it had to be this way."

His red ruby eyes were stuck on the man as he bowed his head down, trying to look away from his handsome features.

"We have to end whatever we have now."

The man was quiet at first before he reached for Rin's chin and pulled him up until their line of sight reached each other's. His fingers made their way from Rin's chin to behind his neck as he pulled the man closer to him, his body touching his.

"You know you'll be happier with me."

With both of his hands on his torso, Rin pushed himself away, his face flustered. "Sosuke."

The ex swimmer put up a warm smile, "Are you sure about this?"

Silent at first, Rin nodded. "I want to try and save my marriage with Haru as much as I can."

The ex swimmer could see the determination in Rin's eyes to save whatever he had left with Haru. Sosuke didn't see what was there left to save as their marriage was already on the rocks before Haru discovered Rin was cheating with him. It was sad to watch Rin suffer like this.

He remembered as he was offered to be Rin's best man at his wedding and Sosuke was glad for the offer. Even though his feelings for Rin weren't obvious back then, it did get more unbearable as the years went on by as Rin and Haru soon adopted their first child, Saito.

"Because you're important to me, I'll let you go. Just remember I'm always here for you Rin."

Rin chuckled at the statement, "That's how we got into trouble in the first place."

Trying to put up a grave face, "Of course, how could I forget?"

The sounds of keys dropping to the kitchen bench were the first signs to Rin that his dear husband had finally returned home. After fixing his relationship with Sosuke and finally closing that chapter of his life, he could see Haru had gone sailing again due to how wet his hair had become.

He leaned at the entrance of the kitchen door. He knew that his sister was helping him deal with Haru's issues with him by offering to join him on his sailing adventures. Four months had passed but Rin felt that it only had drawn them more apart.

He loved Haru. He needed him. He needed his hugs and kisses that he loved so much waking up too. He missed his warms arms around his waist and sweet caress voice that he only shared with him.

"Haru," Rin finally spoke, with his arms crossed and still learning on the door entrance of the kitchen. "We need to talk."

His husband finally locked his eyes with him. Even though there was no anger in them no more, it still felt wrong. As if Haru was nothing but an empty shell and his emotions had left him months ago.

"What do you want to talk about this time?"

Rin felt Haru's shoulder bump into him as he walked passed. Rin watched as Haruka poured himself a glass of water.

"I want to fix our marriage."

Suddenly Haruka missed his glass completely as cold water splashed onto the kitchen table top. His eyes widen by the suddenly shocking announcement. Haruka blinked a few times as he tried hard to find the right words to speak.

With his hand still in the puddle of cold water, Haru clenched his fist.

With his voice as cold as the water itself, "What about Sosuke?"

Standing upright finally, "I've ended things with him."

Haruka stared at his husband before walking to the sink to clean up the water he had split. He didn't know if he could trust Rin's words but as he looked at the way he was standing in front of him, he knew he was serious about getting back together with him.

"How ironic," Haru rolled his eyes as he wiped away the water with a sponge, "I was thinking of a divorce."

Rin felt his knees shake and felt like they were going to give way from what he had just heard. He felt his feet shuffle backwards until it touched the kitchen wall. He felt as if his heart had just died from the bad news.

He couldn't believe Haru was ready to let go, but yet again he couldn't blame him. In fact he should have seen this happening a mile away even since Saito was introduced into their lives.

After taking in a few seconds to accept Haru's words, "A-Are you sure?"

Haru could hear the desperation in his husband's voice as he took a drink from his glass. "We are getting nowhere Rin. You know that."

Having a hard time accepting that his marriage was literally on the brink of falling apart, "What about we go see a marriage counselor?!" Rin was getting desperate.

Haru dropped his empty glass onto the kitchen bench and stared at his husband. The way he was looking at him he knew he really wanted them to work out. His ruby eyes that he admired were on the brink of breaking down as water began to build up in his eyes. Haru glanced away and pondered for a moment.

Half of him wanted to get back with Rin and the other was tired of loving him. He was stuck at a crossroad and had no idea which way to head down.

After having a minute to roughly get his mind up Haruka glanced back at his husband. "Fine,"

"So, Rin and Haruka Nanase, we will now go into some personal questions here. I hope that is fine for both of you."

Both husbands nodded as the female counselor who was sitting opposite of them flipped through her notes. She readjusted her glasses and both looked at the professional swimmers.

"After hearing what you both had to say, I believe your marriage isn't physical but more emotional."

Crossing his arms and leaning on his chair, "That sounds about right." Rin spoke as Haruka remained quiet through the whole ordeal.

"Now, may I ask, when was the last time you guys had sex?"

Both their eyes widen as embarrassment crossed their cheeks. Rin covered his face with his hand as Haruka just tried to look away. Nobody could blame them as it wasn't an everyday conversation topic.

Trying to break through the awkwardness of the topic Haru's voice was heard in the room first. "…on…Rin's birthday…" Haruka tried so hard to make himself stop blushing but he felt his cheeks still red.

"I see. Rin is that true?"

"Ah…um…y-yes…" Rin stuttered. His cheeks were nearly as red as his hair.

"Alright then," The counselor placed her notes down onto her desk. "Now tell me, when was the last time you guys made love?"

Taking in another moment Haru answered. "On Rin's birthday."

Haruka glanced over at Rin and saw he was taking his time with answering a simple question he had just answered. Both Haru and the marriage counselor waited for Rin to give an answer but minutes had passed by and Rin still didn't give an answer. Haruka looked into Rin's eyes and could see he was filled with sadness and guilt.

"…so that night… you weren't really…" Haru looked away disgusted as he didn't want to even finish his sentence.

"I see." The woman in the room tried her best to regain composure between the two men. "Then I suggest the next time you both consider to go to bed together, don't just try to have sex but make love."

"…we'll try." Rin's voice finally was heard in the room. He glanced at Haruka who gave back in response a death-like glare at he left the room in a rather foul mood. Rin could hear Haruka slam the door on his way out.

Haruka felt his feet bring him outside of the building and noticed the overcastted weather. There was no sun shining nor did the wind feel warm. Leaning against the wall he body sled down until he was now on the ground. His whole body felt emptier than it did before. He kept looking up at the skies as his ears picked up on the sounds of doors opening.

Footsteps followed and headed his way. Haruka didn't want to look who those feet belonged to as he had a good idea who they belonged too.

"I'll be in the car." Rin's voice was heard before Haru heard his feet shuffle away.

Still sitting on the cold cemented floor Haru closed his eyes as he began to hear the small patters of rain crashing on the rooftop above him.

Days and nights have passed as Haruka read over his training schedule for the next two weeks. As much he tried to get his mind to focus on his training and qualifications to get into the Olympic Games four years from now, he couldn't, not after what he heard from Rin at the marriage counseling days before. He glanced at the paper on his desk again before slumping back into his chair.

He then raised his hand on where his wedding ring was. Why was it even there still? Nothing was happening between them. Haru felt like he was now on a train waiting for it to crash when he had plenty of time to leave beforehand.

Soon Haruka could feel warm arms placed on his shoulders as Rin's chest was pressed against his back. His fingers naturally letting the paper in his fingers slip and float back onto his desk and Rin's warm lips made contact with the back of his neck. Rin's fingers traced down Haru's chest as Haru closed his eyes for a brief moment and as he opened them up once more he noticed Rin was looking right at him.

Confused at Rin's actions he let his husband play the lead and kiss him on his lips. He felt their tongues clashing and felt Rin pushing forward before something hit within Haru as he placed his hands on Rin's chest and shifted his face away from him.

"Get off." He spoke softly.

He couldn't kiss him any longer. Rin tried to move his face closer to his husband before he felt Haru had pushed him away.

"I can't do this." Haru sat up from his chair and Rin tried to approach him. "Damn it!" Haru hissed.

Shocked, Rin walked up to Haruka and tried to hold his hands. It only lasted a second before Haru withdrew even that privilege.

"But just a moment ago you-"

"And that was just a moment of weakness!" Haruka yelled. Rin was surprised at how quickly Haruka was getting angry towards him. "The longer we kissed the more I see you kissing that bastard Sosuke!" Haru wiped his lips clean. "I can't continue this."

Walking past his husband Rin heard Haruka slam the door shut on him again as he ran his hand through his red hair. His dread began to overcome him as he wondered if he was now fighting a losing battle.

Under the covers once more Haru opened his eyes to the sound of his phone vibrating beside him; the light on the screen shining bright under the covers. He watched the little device jump up and down a little before letting his hand reach for it. He squinted his eyes at the light and saw Gou's name show up on the screen.

Releasing himself from the covers he answered the call and placed it on loudspeaker. Only his head was above the covers as he waited to hear Gou's voice from the other end of the call.

"Hello Haru?" Gou's sweet voice gave an unexpected smile to Haru's lips.

"Hey." He greeted quietly. Gou noticed his instantly.

"Hey Haru, I was going to call you about if you could help me move into my new apartment this weekend with Nagisa and Rei but maybe now isn't the time. Maybe I'll call another time?"

"No. Don't." Haru spoke bluntly. "Please. Stay."

Gou knew by the way her brother-in-law was talking that he was suffering from his marriage problems with her brother once again. Taking a seat on her bed Gou began to ponder words to get the quiet man talking.

"What happened now?"

Haru clenched his fist into his pillow as he tried to find a way to begin talking. Haru just stared at his phone as he kept on hearing Gou's voice on the other end, calling his name repetitively.

"Your brother…has been cheating on me longer than I thought."

The woman on the other end tried hard to not lose her grip on her phone and at the same time not lose respect towards her older brother.

"I'm giving up on him Gou."

Standing up onto her two feet, "Stay where you are Haru, I'm going to you!"

His eyes widen at Gou's proposal. She was his sister-in-law yet she was going to take his side of the argument? He didn't want to break up Gou's relationship with his brother after all the hard work she did back in their high-school years. But he needed to talk to someone. He didn't care if it had to be Nagisa of all people; he just wanted someone to express his feelings too.

"But what about Rin…?"

"I'm sure he doesn't want to see you like this either."

Lost for words, Haru slipped out a simple yes as he ended the call and closed his eyes. It was going to be a long night.

Loud knocks could be heard on the Nanase property. Pulling himself from the couch Rin walked over to the front door to only hear his sister's voice calling for him or Haru to open the door. Rin was confused at why his sister was at his home so late in the night. It didn't take long for him to conclude that Haru must have contacted her or vise versa. Or Nagisa has somehow found out what happened and contacted her.

Either way, she was here now and there was no way he could turn her back. Not in his condition.

Opening the door Gou was glad to see Rin was there and finally opened the door. Her hair was in a mess and saw it wasn't in its usual ponytail and her clothes were in a mismatch and she was out of breath.

"Hey Rin," Gou greeted. "Sorry for coming over so late."

"Did Haru call you?" Rin went straight to the point.

"No, in fact I called him." Rin moved out of the way and let his sister in as he closed the door behind him. "I actually was calling in to see if you guys can help me move into this new apartment but then I heard Haru's voice. It was so sad and depressing that I couldn't help but come over because I knew you need my help as well." The young woman placed her handbag onto the kitchen counter.

"…how is he? I mean when you were talking on the phone with him." Rin followed his sister to the kitchen.

"…sad of course. I don't know what happened between you guys but I can't stand either of you in pain like this." Gou reached out a tray and a glass from the cupboards in the kitchen. "And we know how bad Haru can stay in his room when he gets super depressed."

Rin recalled the first time he had seen Haru depressed. It was when he had his first major fight with Makoto and he was also losing his drive to swim. That was when they took their first trip to Australia and showed him the swimming scene over there.

"Hey, drink this." Rin was snapped back into reality when he saw his sister handing him a glass of water. "I care for you too, you know." Gou managed to pull up a smile for her brother. Rin felt grateful with his sister's concern for him after all the trouble he had brought to Haru and to her.

"You always cared for me, no matter what trouble I pull you into." Rin chuckled.

"Well that's part of the job of being siblings." Gou laughed as she pulled out some leftovers and began to heat it up. "Well I'm going to Haru now and give him something to eat. We can't have his diet and training for the Games gets affected, now can we?"

The microwave's timer finally went off as Gou opened the microwave door and pulled out the reheated leftovers. She handed a plate to her brother and the rest was placed on a tray with a glass of water to accompany the meal.

As Gou began to make her way to Haru's room, Rin spoke up. "Thanks again Gou."

The young woman glanced over her shoulder, and smiled warmly back at her brother and she turned her attention back to Haruka. Rin watched her sister to make sure she wouldn't trip over herself while heading to Haru's room as he began to understand why Haruka always enjoyed hanging out with her.

Minutes passed as Gou stood by Haruka's door, holding the tray of food and glass of water in her hands. The longer she stood by the door the more she worried that Haruka had done something horrible to himself. She couldn't imagine losing Haru after the years of friendship they had ever since high school. Even if they knew each other since they were young it was only through high school that they really grew close.

Soon she heard the lock click and the door was opened to her finally. Walking in she noticed Haru was walking back to his bed. Placing the tray of food on an empty desk Gou closed the door behind her and walked over to Haru who was looking like trash.

His hair was in a mess and his eyes were bloodshot. He was only dressed in his shirt and shorts and looked like he didn't have a wink of sleep since their last conversation. Taking a seat beside the broken down man Gou stared at him quietly and waited for him to open up to her.

"I…I can't do it anymore Gou." His hair was covering the emotions in his eyes. "The more I try the more I get hurt." He covered his face with his hands.

Gou felt her heart breaking the more she watched Haru suffer. She reached her hands over to his face and slowly pulled his hands away. She held his hands tightly and this caused Haru to turn to face her.

"It's ok." She softly spoke. "We'll always be family even if you end things with my brother." She held his hands tighter. "I don't want you to continue suffering like this. This isn't you Haru."

Gou stared at Haru for a little longer before he slipped his hands away from her before pulling her into an embrace. Gou was left shocked at Haru's rare gesture as she just stood still in his arms.

"Is it really ok?" He asked a second time for reassurance. "Would you blame me if I did divorce your brother? Would things between us stay the same?"

The young woman was confused at Haru's deep and meaningful words. She had no words to muster in time before Haruka started talking again.

"It's just…" Gou felt Haru's arms holding her a little more tightly again. "I…just don't want to lose what we have now."

Gou was lost as she felt her mind run a million miles an hour. She had no idea she meant a lot to her brother-in-law. Still too shocked to move Gou felt Haru bury his head in the cranny of her neck as his grip on her was loosening up.

"I…don't want to lose you." Haru spoke, his voice starting to drop into a whisper.

And before Gou could finally speak she noticed the young man had fallen asleep on her. His body started to fall backwards before Gou reached out and pulled him back up without hurting him too much. As she held the sleeping man in her arms for a few seconds she couldn't help but gaze at his wonderful facial features.

She gazed at the way his dark navy blue hair with crossed his face and how wonderful his lips were to kiss. Gou felt her cheeks heat up at the idea of kissing Haru and quickly yet softly placed the man down on his bed. Standing up she recomposed her and tucked Haru in. Without herself noticing her fingers were running through his hair before pulling herself back.

Holding her right hand, "Damn it Gou, he isn't a child that you can touch his hair just like that!" Gou scolded herself quietly.

Walking away she reached over for the food that she originally made for Haruka and reached for the glass of water and placed it on his bedside table. Even if he missed out on dinner at least he had something to drink in the morning.

Her ruby eyes made her way on the sleeping man once again and couldn't help but smile at his beauty as she finally made her way out.