Roman sat in the driver's seat of the car, occasionally tapping his fingers against the steering wheel as he drove himself and Dean back to the hotel. Dean had managed to get himself stranded at a strip club in the middle of the sticks. It made Roman roll his eyes at the very thought of it. He had spent the evening worrying over the stupid bastard. Roman had even canceled the plans he had had with his family so he could wait for Dean to give him some sort of sign that he was okay. Thankfully he was, but Roman wasn't any happier with the circumstances.
"So do you want to tell me what happened?" Dean didn't look up from his phone. He only shook his head no. "Well at least tell me how you managed to not have a ride. If you needed the car you could have told me. I could've asked Jimmy or Jey to take me in their car."
"I didn't want to bother you with it. A cab seemed easier." Roman couldn't argue with that fact. He just didn't understand why Dean hadn't called for one to bring him back. As much as Roman liked getting any alone time with Dean, coming to get him after a night of whoring wasn't exactly ideal. It actually stung a little that Dean hadn't invited him, especially since Roman had been trying to get a hold of him for hours.
"Did you have a good time?" He didn't get a response. Roman glanced over seeing that Dean was still staring at his phone, anxiously tapping the screen to keep it awake. "Hey" Roman reached out smacking his arm, finally managing to get his attention. "I'm trying to talk to you about your night and you're fucking glued to your phone." Dean shrugged dropping his eyes back to it. "What gives? You hate that thing. Why are you so attached to it all of the sudden?" Dean just shook his head, not wanting to admit that his phone was his last physical connection to Bray. All Dean wanted was one sign that Bray had listened to his message. He didn't care if it was a simple text telling him to fuck off; he still wanted it. "Dude, what the hell? I'm about to throw…" Dean felt Roman start to reach for his phone. Growling, Dean smacked Roman's hand away as he jerked back.
"I'm waiting on a text alright?!" Dean finally stared into Roman's eyes finding the larger man to be less than pleased with that news. "It's not what you're thinking. I'm just…a friend's in a bad place. I'm waiting for him to tell me he got my message." Roman didn't look like he believed him, in fact the skeptical glances he was getting were only making things worse.
Dean let out an aggravated sigh not wanting to stay on this any longer. He needed a new topic, something that would serve as a nice distraction for both of them.
"Just tell me about your night. How'd it go?" Mindless small talk would work. Roman loved to talk about his family. Given the chance, he would talk about them 24/7. They would be back to the hotel and in bed before he was ever done. It was the perfect distraction, or so he thought. He heard Roman echo his frustrated sigh, silently waiting a minute or so before he finally answered Dean's question.
"It was going fine until I got a phone call to come pick someone up at a strip club." Dean dropped his phone in his lap, his eyes snapping to Roman's annoyed face.
"What the fuck? Are you fucking kidding me with that?" Roman glanced over at Dean, giving the smaller man the impression that he wasn't. "You're always asking me to call if I need help and now that I do you're going to give me shit for it? Would you have liked me to just stay there?"
"I would have liked to have known you were going at all."
"Oh I have to ask permission now?" Roman gave him an irritated look.
"Of course not. You want to have some chick bounce her tits in your face, that's fine." Roman looked at Dean again. The smaller man seemed completely on edge and Roman didn't understand why. "What am I supposed to think when you ignore me for hours and then finally call me in the middle of the night like that? You scared me half to fucking death." Roman paused before continuing. "We're not exactly making friends right now. I was worried something had happened to you." Dean felt like an ass at that last part. Of course Roman was worried about him. Roman always worried about him. Dean could only imagine how this looked from Roman's side of things.
Dean had just vanished after the show without as much as a word to anyone as to where he was going. He had steadily ignored Roman all night, only to turn up a few hours later in a strip club parking lot, with a black eye and one step below frantic. Now he was glued to his phone, ignoring Roman while he was waiting for Bray to respond. Dean had to agree that even for him it was odd.
"It's not what you're thinking." Roman only shook his head.
"If you don't want me with you that's cool. You need your space and I need mine. Just next time, tell me first. I don't want anything bad to happen to you." Roman glanced over at Dean, giving him an unreadable look. "Just forget it. We can talk about it later. We're almost back to the hotel."
The car fell silent after that. Dean sat there staring at him, debating whether he should tell Roman the truth or not. Thanks to Bray, Dean had an out. Roman didn't know that he had gone to see Bray, more importantly he didn't have to know. As far as Roman was concerned, Dean had spent the night partying. The story really told itself. It wasn't a lie, he was just leaving out a key detail. It wouldn't matter unless Roman found out. Unless Roman found out; that last part echoed through his mind. If he found out. There was no question that if was nothing more than a day dream. If really should have been when; when Roman found out. "So were any of them pretty or were they just average?" Dean turned his head staring at Roman. He thought about how hurt the larger man was over not being invited out. He could barely imagine how angry Roman would be, how hurt he would be when he discovered that Dean hadn't been completely honest about tonight. Dean couldn't bear the thought of that. He couldn't bear the idea of losing Roman over this. It wasn't worth losing Roman over. "Dean" Roman turned glancing at him, his face getting concerned. Dean stared back, struggling to form the words. "Dude what is it? I asked if any of them were pretty and you're looking at me like I shot your dog. Did something…."
"I went to see Bray."
Everything felt like it was happening in slow motion after that last statement. Dean felt Roman slam on the breaks. The car came to a hard stop, nearly throwing both of them through the windshield, seat belts and all.
"You WHAT?!" The larger man turned to look at Dean, his anger clearly showing. It actually made Dean flinch.
"It's not like that."
"It's not like what? You told me you were done with that crazy ass motherfucker. You promised me that you were. Now you're telling me you went to see him?!" Dean shook his head.
"I needed…"
"You needed? What the fuck do you need from him?!" Roman didn't bother to hide that the idea of Dean needing Bray hurt him. "You don't need a god damn thing from him!"
"You're right. I don't." Dean hoped that would assuage Roman in some way. "But I heard a rumor about him. I needed to know if it was true or not." Roman looked even less thrilled with that excuse than he already was. "He wasn't answering his phone and I couldn't find him after the show, so I went over to his hotel."
"You went to his hotel." Dean nodded, quickly realizing that had been the wrong detail to share. "How did you know how to find it? Did he tell you? Did he give you a key?" Roman paused, taking a deep breath. The hurt feelings becoming very evident on his face. "Did you met him there when you went out this morning?" Dean quickly shook his head.
"No. I asked Carrano's assistant. She told me." Dean reached out to lay his hand over Roman's, but the larger man quickly pulled his hand away. "Ro nothing happened alright? I just went to check on him."
"Why the fuck do you care? That asshole is poison." Dean rolled his eyes at that. "I fucking mean it! You two almost killed each other the last time you were together. Now you're going back for more?"
"I told you nothing like that happened. Nothing like that is going to happen. I'm with you." Roman gave him a disbelieving look. "But whether you like it or not, he's still my friend." It was Roman's turn to roll his eyes. "We just talked."
"About what? What could you possibly need to talk to him about?" Dean paused, his eyes falling to his phone for a brief second, before he looked back at Roman's irritated face.
"He's leaving." Dean heard his voice break at that omission. "I was trying to stop him from leaving. I knew if I just kept him there that I could make him listen to me, but he wouldn't." He quickly brought his hands up, wiping away the fresh tears that were threatening to betray him. "He told me he was tired of being made a fool of and that he was going home." Dean wiped away more tears. "We got into it and his boys came in for the assist. Strowman knocked me out and they must've left me at the strip club on their way out of town." Dean looked away, his eyes dropping to the floor of the car.
Part of him couldn't stand to see Roman's reaction to all of it. Aside from being absolutely furious that Dean had gone at all, he knew Roman wasn't going to shed any tears over Bray's departure.
"When you say leave…" Dean winced at the hint of glee in Roman's voice.
"He's….he's gone." Dean heard Roman's smack against the steering wheel.
"And you tried to stop him?! What the fuck is wrong with…." Dean's eyes snapped up to Roman's face, watching the jovial look that had been on it quickly fall. It was enough to force the emotions that Dean had been struggling to hold in out of him.
"Because it's my fucking fault he's gone!" Dean brought his hand up, roughly running it over his collar bone. "I ran him off just like I did everyone else." Roman shook his head.
"Dean no…"
"He left because of me; because I made him look like a fool. He couldn't stand it anymore." Tears began to brim in Dean's blue eyes again. He didn't try to hide them this time.
"He left because he's a damn coward Dean. What makes you think this is even real? For all either one of us know, this is some ploy to make you come back to him." Dean shook his head, getting more upset with every breath he took.
"You didn't see him. You didn't hear him." Roman gave him an unconvinced look. "You don't want to believe me, fine; but he was as cold as ice Ro. I begged him to stay. I told him I would do anything to make it happen." That news didn't make Roman happy. The very idea that Bray could have extracted anything from Dean made Roman nervous. "He turned me down. You think he would have done that if this was a cry for attention?" The larger man didn't know what to think on that. "Strowman knocked me the fuck out. Bray could have done anything he wanted. Hell they could have drug me back to the compound with them. What did he do?" Dean rubbed his collarbone even harder. "He left me in a fucking parking lot!" He flinched at Dean's tone, unsure on how to respond to any of it. He continued to stare at Dean, watching the smaller man retrieve his phone and go back to gazing at it.
"So your friend…"
"I didn't know what else to do. I was so angry that I called him. " Roman grunted in disapproval. "He isn't responding."
"Maybe that's a good thing." Dean simply shook his head no, ending any further conversation on that topic.
Roman turned his eyes back out to the road, wondering if it was really true. Dean was right. Bray had been given every opportunity to take advantage of him. Normally all it took was Dean going to Bray's hotel room to satisfy the larger man; but tonight it hadn't been enough. Dean had promised to give Bray anything he wanted and again Bray had refused. Then the coup de gras was Bray having an unconscious Dean all to himself. Bray could have done whatever he wanted either in the hotel or once he had gotten back to the compound. He could have forced Dean to stay with him with just the simple promise of never leaving again. It was truly frightening what could have happened, but it hadn't. Instead Bray had cast Dean aside. He had just skulked off into the night, tail between his legs. Maybe it was true after all. Maybe Bray really was gone.
A flash of light in the rear-view mirror snapped Roman out of his daze. He quickly became aware that they were both still in the car, and that the car was sitting smack dab in the middle of the road. He turned, looking over his shoulder, seeing another car quickly approaching them. "Fuck!" Figuring they weren't quite done, Roman took his foot off the gas, steering them onto the side of the road. It was a good thing he had, because in what felt like the blink of an eye, the other car's tails lights were fading into the darkness. It made Roman breathe an unexpected sigh of relief. He took a quickly look at the clock. "Fuck it's late." He looked back at Dean. "Listen…" He reached out smacking Dean's arm agian. "Look at me Dean." He waited for the smaller man to tear his eyes away from the device in his hand. "He's not going to respond tonight, so might as well put that thing away."
"You don't know that." Roman sighed. Feeling himself get irritated again. The idea that Dean was on the edge of his seat for even a nod from Bray bothered him. "He could send something…." Roman finally reached out, snatching the phone from Dean's hands. "HEY!" Dean tried to grab it back, but Roman ended that by dropping the stupid thing in the side pocket of the car door. "Give it back!"
"You know what? No."
"I mean it Ro. Give. It. Back." There was a growl at the end of the word back that Roman really didn't appreciate.
"I mean it to Dean. You're supposed to be with me, yet all you can do is fret over some psycho texting you back." Roman ran his fingers through his hair. "This was supposed to be over." Dean blinked not liking where this was going. "We didn't fuck his shit up over the summer for you to go running back to him at some stupid rumor."
"So what are you saying? "
"He wouldn't come running to you over a rumor. He wouldn't try to stop you from leaving. He would be pining over his phone, waiting for you to text him." Dean blinked, swallowing hard. Bray never had to come running at the mention of a rumor, he had always been right there. If Dean had wanted to leave then Bray wouldn't have stopped him. He would have happily gone with him. Bray would have moved the earth itself if it meant he would be happy. It was a tough pill to swallow. "How can you act like it's the end of the world that he's gone when I'm right here?"
"Because I love him."