Hi so here is another chapter, I think that I might be able to get another chapter out before I go on holiday but i'm giving you warning now.

Disclaimer-Nothing is mine.

Please Read and Review.

On a side note-I understand some aspects like Rachel and Paul's age are different than the books describe them as. However this story is AU, there are gonna be bits that are AU and age is one of them. Also I known the American Education system is different to the UK one so if there are any discrepancies over Shay's schooling then I apologise.

Enjoy.

I Would For You

Paul/Rachel Fanfiction-When Rachel Black left La Push nearly four years ago to go to college she was carrying a secret. When she returns to pick up the pieces in the aftermath of her brother's disappearance she has no idea of what fate has in store for her and the effect it has on her life.

Chapter 9-The Downwards Crash

Rachel's Point of View.

I was shaking when I left Paul's place, my skin felt like it was crawling with something and I had to physically stop my car when I got to the beginning of my driveway to calm myself down. I felt like I was gonna be sick.

Jacob, Paul, Leah, Seth, Jared, Jackson, that little boy…all those lives ruined, all those children, forced to become men so earlier than they had to. I wanted to cry, I wanted to scream, and I wanted to throw things.

And Shay…Good God what the hell was I gonna do about Shay? About my sweet little baby girl who had no idea that her father could lose control and turn into a wolf whenever she made him angry. She was five, she was a baby she didn't understand any of this.

My anger only increased as my house came into view. My father had known about this, he'd purposely kept Rebecca and me in the dark and then when I had come home, when I had explained I was leaving he had looked at me like I'd stabbed him in the back and now it all made sense.

My mind was racing at one hundred miles per minute. This explained why he had never been worried when Jacob had disappeared, why Charlie Swan's visits were few and far between, why Harry Clearwater's heart attack was brushed under the rug in terms of the news. My Dad had purposely kept something that was potentially life changing to both me and my baby and had allowed me to find out half naked in my ex's house.

Ok so my Dad hadn't predicted that part but the fury was simmering under my skin.

One thing however was abundantly clear. The one thing that broke through the haze of anger and white fog and made me focus with sharp clarity.

I had to leave.

Now.

If Shay had this gene then I needed to be with her. I needed to keep her far away from La Push which seemed to be the trigger. I needed to keep her away…from Paul…

I swallowed down my sob.

I had been ready, so ready for a relationship with him, I had been ready for him to come to Hawaii and meet his daughter and fall in love with her the same way I did. I had been ready and so in love and once again so blind with the facts.

I was in Civil Engineering for God's sake I was supposed to have a career based on facts!

And now I had to confront my father. I had kept a secret from him for five years and now for the first time in my life I felt justified. I had to know why he had chosen to keep this secret from me, If I had never come back, If I had married someone else and had their child would he have told me that I could potentially carry a gene in my DNA that could forever change my child, my life…could potentially end it.

And God…Rebecca. My sweet honey and sunshine sister who was trying so desperately to conceive a child where I had succeeded with no help whatsoever. She had loved Jacob more than I had if that were possible, she'd practically raised him after the accident. The thought of telling her that Jacob turned into a wolf at will…

I slammed myself out of the car and up the path and into the house. My Dad was waiting for me. Judging by the look on his face I knew he'd known. Sam Uley had probably called him. If…but I couldn't think of his name right now.

"You know" he said finally watching me with those brown eyes that had made me feel safe as a child when the scariest thing I'd ever had to worry about was the monsters under my bed. Those eyes hat had kept me sane when Mom had died. Those eyes that had looked into mine and lied the same way I had lied to him.

"I know" I said finally.

My Dad sighed looking worn.

"I'm leaving" I said holding my head high. I would refuse to be bullied out of this decision. It was my choice and I was choosing to walk away. Running was something that I had used as a coping mechanism all my life and I wasn't about to change that now. I had ran when I was pregnant and I was running now. I had chosen Shay then without even knowing her and now I knew her perfect darling little face I wasn't about to make a different choice.

My Dad did look up at me then urgency colouring his eyes.

"Did you speak to Paul about things?"

"Hard not to when a kid explodes into a wolf in front of you" I said finally.

"Were you planning on telling me or Rebecca at some point? Or where we just supposed to wait till we changed to? Or God Forbid our children?"

My Dad flinched at that. "There was no reason too." he muttered finally his eyes dropping down. "As far as I knew you and Rebecca had made it pretty clear that you had lives in places other than here. And I didn't want to drag you home unless I had to"

"Jacob" I supplied finally. The pieces of the puzzle were finally all crashing down around me but that still didn't stop the anger from burning under my skin. My Dad nodded. "Charlie Swan's the Sherriff and Bella and Jacob have a rather…complicated…history and when Charlie learned that Jacob was missing I knew he was going to ring you and Rebecca so I did it myself and then…" he shrugged. "I didn't think that you and Paul…"

"You knew?" I asked incredulously. "You knew about that before today, you knew about Prom?"

The fact that my father who had hated even the remote discussion of sex when it came to me and Rebecca had known exactly what me and Paul had gotten up to was staggering.

My Dad blinked looking horrified.

"Wait…today…" and he blanched as I resisted a grin when I saw that the look on his face. Because I bet Sam had told him that too…

"Today wasn't the first time that you and he have had…" he gestured his hands together and I snorted. "You're not the only one in this family that can lie through their teeth and keep secrets. Did Rebecca tell you that she's struggling to conceive and that her marriage might be crashing down her ankles?"

My Dad shifted then. "No" he said finally. "No she didn't."

"I have to leave" I said finally wiping my eyes.

"I have to leave here, this place isn't good for me, Paul…" I shook my head. "I love him" I said finally. "I never stopped even for the last five years and while this explains everything I don't want this…I don't want werewolves and vampires and half vampire babies"

I turned then and walked steadily up the stairs.

I had never planned on staying long and that was noted in my clothes which for the most part were still unpacked and my boots strewn on the floor. I checked my diary finally as I was throwing it in. When I got to the airport I needed to see if they had a pharmacy. If there was one thing I didn't want it was another child and me and Paul had never exactly had a track record with protection. I mean…look at the one time we'd had sex previously.

I grabbed the last of my things and forced myself down the stairs. My Dad hadn't moved all that much from where he'd been sat in front of the kitchen.

"You'll ring me when you get home?" he asked and I paused on the spot.

"You won't stop me?"

My Dad laughed that same hollow, bitter, broken laugh he'd given for those years after my Mom had died. "You think it would make a difference? I learned a long time ago what happened when you and your and sister want something. You get that from your Mother and I could never make her stay either"

"Ok" I said finally swallowing hard.

"Rachel please call me when you can" he asked his bony and withered hands outstretched. "Please…"

I nodded grabbing his hand back, things between me and my father had never been simple. Out of all of the children he had raised into adulthood I had been the most difficult. I had, I realised then with a startling clarity that I was still the one that had lied the most. But I grabbed onto my anger with full force and let it consume me. At least until I got home to my sister, a bottle of wine and my daughter.

"Don't tell Rebecca" my Dad said and I looked down at him with raised eyebrows. "Why?" he sighed, out of the three of us Rebecca would probably understand this more, would accept this more. She had loved Jacob and protected him in a way I never could apparently and I thought that she would be the first person to accept what had happened.

"I want to tell her personally" My Dad said finally. "I should have done…I should have done this differently"

I nodded. "Don't hate yourself for this" I said finally. "I should have done a lot of things differently too" looking back It was impossible to say if I had done the right thing by keeping the existence of Shay to myself. I had chosen to protect my child and in light of the new evidence that both Paul and my brother were werewolves or whatever they were confirmed that in that retrospect I had done the right thing but as I climbed into my car and drove of away from my home I had to wonder.

Denying my father his granddaughter, Paul his daughter, Rebecca selling out her soul to lie to me and Shay not knowing about half of her family. Had it really done any good or had it caused more irreparable damage?

A wolf howled in the distance as I left La Push but I knew with a sickening sense of certainty that I would be back.

Next Chapter-Paul's point of view and will probably cover most of the latter events in Breaking Dawn.