Change of Heart

Summer 2009:

"I love you." Aaron's words echoed around the night sky. Claire suddenly felt very small and vulnerable as she looked into his deep blue eyes. Truthfully, she was speechless. Sure, they had spent the night together, and many the nights since. "But, I love you? Am I really ready for this?" An image of Peter flashed through her mind. His comfortable brown eyes, his safe lop-sided grin, his smooth supple hands. "I can't remember the last time I held his hand. Why should that matter? You're out here, under the stars, with an amazing man - who loves you - and all you can do is think about him . . ." She hadn't been able to stop thinking of him all night, ever since she had seen his name flicker on the caller display of her cell phone as she was running out the door to her date. She had stared at it curiously, watching it for what seemed an eternity. She couldn't bring herself to answer. He didn't leave a message and now it was driving her crazy. "What did he want? . . . Was he calling to apologise? . . . What if something was wrong?"

"Claire?" Aaron's voice stopped the barrage of thoughts whizzing through her mind.

"I'm, a, wha . . ." Her reply was garbled.

"Claire?" He eyed her suspiciously. "You okay?"

Claire flicked her green eyes up at him, a goofy smile on her face. Desperate to save the moment, she sprung forward into his arms. She kissed him deeply, secretly hoping he wouldn't notice her reaction to those three little words.

"Hey . . . You two!" Abby's loud and overly obnoxious voice carried well through the still night air. She was followed by her latest boyfriend, Steve. A solidly built sophmore whose entire reason for being at college was football, drinking and women. In fact, he would tell everyone and anyone, given half a chance. Claire could not bring herself to understand what Abby saw in him, but at least he treated her well.

Claire and Aaron broke apart slowly. A small look of disappoint flashed across Aaron's face, but it was gone quickly, before anyone could notice. He grabbed Claire by the hand.

"Better get you back," Aaron whispered huskily. "Finals tomorrow."

"Thanks for dinner." Claire nodded as she spoke, still thankful their romantic moment had been rudely interrupted. "You can't escape this one forever, you know."

Claire: I had been so preoccupied with exams and hiding the inner turmoil I still felt about Peter, that I was completely blown away by what happened next.

Claire Bennet stood in the doorway and surveyed her dorm room. It was filled with boxes and suitcases. Her whole year was about to be packed away into little boxes. She was a little sad, but also filled with anticipation for the long summer ahead. Maybe she would be lucky and get a job. Maybe she would spend her days lazily sunbathing around the Petrelli pool. Most of all she hoped that she would also be able to visit Aaron. "Maybe I'll get to meet his family."

She spend the entire afternoon packing away her life. Reminiscing about college parties and new friends. Remembering the classes and late night study sessions. Thinking about Aaron and how lucky she was to have him. It was almost a guilty feeling.

Claire picked up a box from her chest of drawers. She squealed as the bottom gave way and the contents flew out in all directions. Text books and papers landed with a thud on the floor.

She stared at them curiously for a moment, before leaning over and gingerly picking up a leather bound book. "My old diary" She laughed at how immature it sounded, before sitting down and flicking through it.

Pete and I got told off by Nathan today for our snow fight. How ridiculous, it wasn't like we knew those stupid paparazzi guys were tailing us. I mean c'mon how interesting are two people, an Uncle and Niece, out for a run.

Claire smiled at the memory of the soft wet snow. How simple her life had seemed back then. She read on.

The two-timing Bastard! I dare not mention his name. Just cos I don't have a pair of perfect double D's and because I'm not willing to climb into bed with him. I'm so angry I want to ram my hand down their sleazy throats . . . if only I could stop crying for a moment . . .

. . . Something weird is happening between me and Pete. He smiles at me and I get butterflies. He brushes up against my arm and I practically hit the roof. He's my Uncle. I think there is something wrong with me. Maybe, I'm just projecting my feelings of Liam onto him. God, I hope so . . .

. . . Prom Day! I'm so excited. I'm going to look so HOT! I can't wait to see what Pete thinks of my dress. I'm gonna knock him dead. Figuratively, speaking of course!

The next entry bought tears to her eyes.

I can't believe this. He's a complete and utter sleaze. Kissing Becca? What was he thinking? We had a massive fight and now we're not speaking. I just want to throw myself under a truck . . . like it would achieve anything . . . but I do. I want to tell him, how I feel, tell him all about the mixed up feelings inside. But, I can't. He's Mr Serious. Mr Always does the right thing. I could never look him in the eye again if he found out the truth . . . Hell, I can barely bring myself to do that now!

Claire's breath caught in her throat as those old feelings rushed to the surface again. But, they weren't old feelings. Not matter how many times she denied them, the feelings were always there. In some ways they were growing stronger by the day. At the same time, she still harboured strong resentment towards his recent actions. "How can I hate you this much when all I want to do is love you, Pete."

Footsteps pounded in the hallway outside. Claire quickly hid the diary under some boxes and wiped her eyes.

Abby and Steve burst through the doorway. "Hiya, Claire-Bear!" Giggling.

"Hey guys." She forced herself to smile. "What's up?" An agonising loneliness spreading through her chest.

More giggling. Steve kissed Abby on the cheek. It made a grotesque sucking sound.

Claire took the hint. "You've got 15 minutes. Then I really have to finish packing."

Steve winked. "Yuck!" she thought "How she can let him touch her I will never know . . . "

Claire found herself along in the hallway. Most of the other residents of her shared dorm had already moved out. She poured herself a coffee and sat in the communal lounge, day dreaming. After about half an hour Aaron appeared to help her load stuff into her car.

"I'll go move my car around to the back entrance. You can shoo the lovebirds out and start bringing some of the boxes down." Claire instructed Aaron as she bounced down the hallway. She was too busy organising to notice the worried look on his face.

"Claire . . ." he called after her.

"Back in a minute," she said with a smile and a quick wave.

She was in the middle of moving the car when she suddenly remembered the diary. Claire rushed back to her room. She burst through the doorway, hoping against hope that he hadn't seen the it. She was too late.

Aaron sat on the corner of her bed, wide eyed as he flicked through the pages.

He looked up when she entered the room, a puzzled look on his face.

"I . . . I can explain," she stammered, her heart pounding.

"You . . . You have feelings for your Uncle?" His face was expressionless. Blue eyes filled with questions.

"No . . . I had . . . Might have had . . . That was a long time ago. I was different then."

Aaron stood up, leaving the small leather book on the bed.

"I know it might seem sick to you, but I was confused. A lot of stuff happened to me back then. Some of it I've told you about . . . and some well, I haven't found the right time to explain yet."

A long silence passed between them.

"Say something . . . please," she begged him.

He sighed. "This explains some things. It even kind of makes this easier for me . . ."

The words hit Claire like a kick to the chest. "Mmma . . . Makes what easier?" she stammered.

"Claire, I don't think we should see each other anymore." He looked away.

"What? After what you said the other night?" Claire was confused. "Is this because I didn't say I love you?" Her eyes narrowed.

He looked back at her, blue eyes watering. "I love you, Claire Bennet. From the moment I met you, I've only thought of you . . . but, lately, I've come to realised that you don't feel the same way."

"That's ridiculous. I care deeply about you . . ."

"But it feels like there is always something holding you back. When we're alone, you never seem comfortable around me."

Claire shook her head and moved to the bed to sit down, her hand reached out to support herself. "I can't believe you're breaking up with me."

"Whenever we're around other people, you change. You're sudden completely into me . . . oh yeah, especially when you're with your family. I feel like I'm being used, like you need me to feel normal or something . . . I dunno . . ."

"That's not true," her voice trembled.

He knelt down beside her, a solitary tear slid down his face. "Please don't make this any harder then it already is. I love you . . . but I'm not prepared to be your second best." His voice was close to cracking.

"So that's it? We just go our separate ways, like we never happened? Cos, something happened between us okay . . . And I will never forget that."

"I know, neither will I. But, part of me feels like I took advantage of you that night."

"No, you've never done anything to hurt me . . . I . . ." Claire blinked back tears. "No . . . no."

He hugged her. One final lingering embrace. "I have to go," he said quietly.

Claire nodded.

"I hope you find what you're looking for." He pulled the door open.

"Aaron . . ."

He stopped and turned to face the pretty young woman he loved one last time. Blue eyes filled with agonising pain.

Her voice was stronger now. "For what it's worth . . . I'm sorry."

He acknowledged her with a small head bob and then he was gone.

Claire sat still for a few minutes trying to let the conversation sink in. Her head throbbed, her heart ached. Confused feelings swirled in her stomach. Suddenly, there was only one person she wanted to see. One person wanted to talk to. She had to tell him. To finally, tell him that no matter how much she said she hated him, it was all a lie.

She grabbed a set of keys from on top of the drawers and raced from the campus. She drove as quickly as she could. "C'mon . . . C'mon." She urged the traffic on. A surge of emotion pushing her on. She parked, awkwardly. But she didn't care. She only wanted him. Bounding up the stairs, she stopped in front of his door to catch her breath. "Am I really going to do this?"

She rapped her knuckles gently on the door. "C'mon." Nothing. Only silence. She knocked again. "Please. Please be home. I need you to be home." She waited. Still nothing. She knocked again after a few minutes.

"Oh. He's not there, Love." The voice startled her. A lump formed in her throat.

Claire turned to face the Old Man standing a few door down. "Oh." It was all she could manage.

"Moved out."

"Moved out?" she echoed, heart hammering relentlessly in her chest.

"Yeah. A few days ago."

"Do you know where-"

"Overseas," The Old Man interrupted. "Europe or something."

His words took her breath away. "Th . . . Thanks."

"You don't need a place at all, do ya, Love?"

She shook her head and watched as the the man shuffled back along the corridor.

"No, no, no, no, no." Her brain processed the information. First Aaron, now Peter. He was gone and she had driven him away. "Gone . . . to the other side of the world . . . No . . . To get away from you . . . No . . . Just like you told him to." She started taking large gulps of air. She felt weak and had to lean against the wall for support. Her chest ached, as if her heart would explode. She closed her eyes, hoping the world would swallow her whole. She fought against them, but could not stop the tears that rolled down her burning cheeks. She cried out as the floor gave way beneath her and she slid down the wall. There she stayed, crumpled on the ground, face in her hands. The anguish of the moment forcing her into a completely uncontrollable emotional breakdown.

Half a world away, Peter Petrelli took a deep breath and peered over the side of the railing. All around he could see the breathtaking scene of Paris at night. He felt renewed, ready to take on the world again. "Happy Birthday, Claire." There was sadness in his heart, a longing that no distance could erase. But here, atop the Arc de Triomphe Peter had a feeling that the journey was only just beginning.

Peter: Nineteen years old, my niece and I was going to win back her trust, no matter how long it took. Because I loved her.

A/N: Phew, this is one angsty story! There's plenty more to come too! And some of those happier moments! Thanks for reading, let me know what you think by way of review - Pip :)

In the Volume Four of The Secret Heart: A New Peter returns from Europe to find out that the full effect of his sudden departure has had on Claire.