Thanks for being patient, those who are waiting to see the finale of this story. There will be one more chapter after this!

CHAPTER 19

It was inevitable that one day someone would adopt one of the horses. After months of caring for the big animals – learning about their fears and needs, and teaching them that even if the world could be a cruel place, there were people with good hearts who were willing to work hard to bring about changes – Jethro received a call from Moira. A couple from out of state, the Merrills, wanted to adopt a rescue horse.

The Merrills had gone online to the horse rescue network site, and looked over the pictures and profiles of available horses. They had seen Kelly Brook Farm's horses posted there, and now they wanted to come and see them in person. Moira had thoroughly checked out the prospective adopters before meeting with them, and after putting them through a lengthy interview, she escorted them over to Kelly Brook Farm to meet Jethro and the horses.

Jethro put on his best face when he greeted the Merrills, who were in their early 30s and both came from horse-oriented backgrounds; Ben's father was a large-animal veterinarian and his wife, Suzanne, had ridden and shown horses since she was a girl. They met the horses and Jethro told them about the animals, their health issues, the way Madagascar had to be approached with caution, how BigBoy's hooves needed extra care, and how far Chevron had come since he'd arrived, malnourished and difficult to handle.

Jethro patted the bay's neck and said, "You have to earn his trust, which isn't easy, but once you do…"

The couple stayed a long time, talking to Moira and Jethro about their experiences with horses over coffee. At the end of their visit they thanked Jethro and said they'd be in touch. A month later Moira called Jethro and told him that the Merrills' application to adopt one of the horses had gone through, their home and barn had been inspected and they had passed with flying colors.

Swallowing hard, hating that it hurt so much to think of one of the horses leaving, Jethro asked, his voice cracking a little, "Which one?"

"Chevron…they want Chevron," Moira said firmly. She informed him that the Merrills would arrive on Saturday morning to pick up Chevron, and take him back home with them. "They're a good match, Jethro. This is what you've worked so hard for. You've brought these animals back to health so they can find their forever home," she said, knowing how hard this was going to be for him.

After the call, Jethro sat in his kitchen, his head in his hands, feeling as though someone had punched him. It was stupid, really, because he'd known from day one that the horses were only temporary guests. He knew that they deserved forever homes. The Merrills were nice, kind people, experienced with animals and equipped to handle a horse that might be difficult at times. Chevron would be well taken care of. He'd be safe and well-loved. He got it, he really did…so why did it feel like his heart was being ripped out?

He called Tony at work, knowing he shouldn't be interrupting him, and as soon as Jethro told him that Chevron was going to a new home, Tony insisted on leaving work early so he could be there for him. Jethro hated himself for being such a big baby, and he told Tony not to rush over. "I'm fine," he insisted. "Come at the weekend, like usual."

After a pause, Tony said, "You're not fine."

"I'm okay, then. That's close enough to being fine," Jethro said, wishing he hadn't bothered Tony in the first place.

Tony sighed. "You know I'm here for you. Whatever you need," he said in a quiet voice. When Jethro didn't reply, Tony asked, "Jethro?"

"Yeah. I'll be…okay." Jethro sighed into the phone. "Look, I've got to get back to work."

"Call me if you want to talk," Tony offered. "If you need me sooner than the weekend…"

"Thanks," Jethro replied, meaning it.

When Tony arrived at midday on Sunday, Jethro said that he wanted to be alone, and took off in the direction of the barn. Even if Tony understood that going off alone was the way Jethro handled things, he was a bit hurt about being rejected. He kept out of Jethro's way until dinnertime, when he showed up smelling of fresh air and hay, and looking a bit less morose.

"Steak and cheese sandwiches?" Tony asked.

"Sure. You want to eat while we watch the game?"

There was football on, and Tony set their dinners on a couple of 1950s-era TV trays Jethro pulled out of the pantry. Things were far quieter than usual as they ate, but at least Jethro traded comments with Tony about the game.

At bedtime they followed their usual routine, with Gibbs sitting up reading while Tony watched an old movie on TV, with the sound down low. As always, they slept beside each other, but for the first time they kept to their own side of the bed. Despite having a restless night, Tony was up early, and was downstairs making breakfast before Jethro even stirred.

Jethro was distant throughout breakfast, looking downcast, and it hurt Tony to see him like that. Before he left for work, Tony went over to Jethro, where he was standing at the sink, and hugged him gently, saying softly, "If you need me, I'll come at any time at all." Jethro hugged him back and gave a small nod.

All week long, Jethro put all his energy into working on the farm. There was a lot to do to get the farm ready for winter and he liked to be prepared. It was only two weeks until Thanksgiving and the nights were getting cooler. There had been a good crop of apples and he'd canned or frozen enough vegetables to last a while. Jethro worked hard; he did carpentry around the house and barn, cut down half an acre of shrubbery at the back of the house, cleaned out the workshop, and groomed all the horses until their coats shone.

By the time Jethro came to his senses, he was exhausted, and his injured arm felt like it was being ripped out of its socket. He eventually accepted, albeit reluctantly, that it was time to face reality, no matter how difficult it might be: Kelly Brook Farm was a rescue, a place where animals were rehabilitated and then, when they were ready, they moved on. This was what he'd signed up for. It was the horses who were important. They deserved a good home with a family.

"I can do this," he muttered to himself as he iced his shoulder, hoping he hadn't done too much damage to it. Luckily his arm felt a lot better after a few days of rest and anti-inflammatories.

Moira had him over to dinner and talked about some of the horses she'd had the privilege of knowing. She opened large albums and showed him photos and mementoes of the animals who had been in her care over the years. Some of them had passed away, and others had found permanent, loving homes. "You show the horse love and respect and kindness and curiosity, and they will return it. That goes for people too," Moira said, patting Jethro's hand.

~ • ~ ~ • ~ ~ • ~

The weekend before Thanksgiving, Ben and Suzanne Merrill arrived at Kelly Brook Farm hauling a horse van behind their pickup. They stood awkwardly outside the barn, with Moira at their side, waiting for Jethro to make the first move. Tony was present, knowing that even if Jethro denied it, he needed him for moral support.

The Merrills had already transferred the supplies they'd be taking with them in their truck, and were now waiting to load the horse into their van. "It's time, Jethro," Moira said," her voice kind yet firm.

When Jethro stood there, staring at the barn and not making a move towards fetching Chevron, Tony volunteered, "I'll get him." He waited a moment, expecting Jethro to say, 'No, I'll do it,' but the older man just nodded, giving Tony permission.

It took a lot of self-control for Tony to choke back his emotions as he clipped a lead on the big horse and led him out of the barn for what would be the last time. Somehow, he managed to keep his tears at bay as he walked Chevron across the yard, to the rear of the horse van.

Ben Merrill made a move to take Chevron's lead rope from Tony, but Jethro stepped in. "I'll do it," he said, taking hold of the rope.

Ben and Suzanne exchanged glances, and she said, "Of course."

Jethro talked softly to the big horse who, without any fuss, followed him up the ramp and into the van. Tony could hear the dull thuds of Chevron's hooves as he moved about inside. While Jethro was busy securing the big dark horse, Tony stayed close by in case he was needed.

Ben walked over to the rear of the open van and called, "Everything okay in there, Jethro?"

Jethro called over his shoulder, "I got it," his tone warning Ben not to join him.

Ben glanced at Tony before returning to his wife's side. Moira took charge and suggested, "Why don't we move Chevron's things into the back of the pickup? This seems like a good time."

"There are two boxes just inside the barn," Tony said, deciding to stay by Jethro while the others loaded up the horse's supplies.

Minutes later, Jethro turned as if to leave the trailer, but after just a couple of steps, he went back and wrapped his arms around the horse's neck. Chevron nodded his head a couple of times, and tugged at Jethro's sleeve with his lips. Tony could see Jethro talking softly to the horse, but whatever he was saying seemed private, so Tony didn't intrude.

Suzanne appeared at Tony's side. She gave him a sympathetic smile. "I know it's really hard for him. I'd be crying buckets."

"He's probably reminding Chevron of the rules," Tony said, managing a small smile. He sniffed and rubbed his nose, hoping he wasn't going to break down in front of everyone.

Suzanne looked at Tony quizzically. "There are rules?"

"Well, yeah, like, 'Don't step on anyone's toes if you weigh more than they do,' and 'No messing up your bunk…uh, stable, right after it's been cleaned.'"

Ben joined them. He nodded and said, "Barn rules. Good to live by, no matter how many legs you've got." Suzanne smiled up at her husband and gave him a hug.

Jethro stepped out of the back of the trailer and approached the people who would be taking Chevron to his new home. "He likes apples over carrots," he told them in a rough voice. The Merrills both nodded. Standing straight as a Marine on a parade ground giving orders, Jethro said, "He needs to be washed with that special shampoo I told you about. I put enough in the box to last you a few weeks. There's a whole package of information in there too. I wrote down the name of a mail-order place–"

"Yes, I saw that. You've been very thorough," Suzanne said. "The boxes are already in the truck. And his blanket, tack, all his things." She was watching Jethro carefully as she spoke, concerned and sensitive to what he was going through. She glanced at her husband before reaching out to touch Jethro on the arm.

For a second, Tony was sure Jethro was going to reject the kindhearted gesture. But then the tension in his demeanor eased and Suzanne's tentative touch turned into a hug. Jethro did nothing to resist her impulsive gesture, and it looked like he hugged her a little in return.

Even though Suzanne spoke softly, her tone was sincere. "We'll take the best care of Chevron, Jethro, and we'll love him as much as you do, I promise, and you can come and see him any time–"

Jethro stepped back and said gruffly, "You'd better go while you've still got daylight."

The couple seemed unsure as how to wind it all up, but Ben stuck out his hand and Jethro was compelled to shake it. Suzanne hesitated, as if she didn't want to leave Jethro like that, but her husband said, "Best we get going now."

Suzanne nodded and said, "Good bye. Good to meet you, too, Tony."

Moira said good-bye, too, giving both men a hug before getting in her car. She handled the gate, opening it and closing it with practiced movements, waving back at the small group before heading home.

Tony stood next to Jethro and watched as Ben Merrill started up his truck and headed slowly up the drive, hauling the horse trailer behind. Jethro walked quickly up the drive to open the gate. Once the pickup was clear, he shut the metal gate with a clang. As the truck pulled out onto the paved road and gathered speed, Tony heard a nicker – Chevron, saying goodbye. One of the horses in the barn whinnied in reply. Tony wiped his sleeve across his eyes, saying, "Damn it."

Jethro stood at the gate for several minutes, a lone figure looking down the road until the truck was out of sight. Just as Tony was about to offer Jethro a shoulder to cry on, if that was what he needed, Jethro abruptly pushed off the gate and headed towards the fields on the far side of the barn.

Tony could see how difficult this was for Jethro, watching his favorite horse being taken away by strangers. Even if the animal was going to a wonderful home, to be cared for and loved by some generous people, it was still tough, especially as this was the first time he'd had to deal with letting one of his rescue horses go.

Despite an overwhelming desire to run after Jethro and hug away all his unhappiness, Tony didn't follow him. Jethro needed to deal with this in his own way, which meant retreating, and even if he didn't like the way Jethro handled things, Tony had to respect his wishes.

~ • ~ ~ • ~ ~ • ~

Daylight waned and Tony turned on the porch lights, but there was still no sign of Jethro.

Tony waited on the porch until it got dark, and then he went inside. At a loss about what to do, he started a fire in the living room, and then set about tidying up his things, including the DVDs he'd left strewn across the coffee table. He slid them into the built-in bookcase, next to Jethro's collection of vintage Zane Grey novels and newer books on the care of horses. They looked good together, Jethro's things and his own entertainment, like they belonged.

Looking for something to do while he waited for Jethro to return, Tony stripped the sheets off his bed as well as Jethro's, even though he felt funny about going into the man's bedroom without permission, and put them in the wash. While he waited for the dryer cycle to end, he sat in the living room with a book, occasionally glancing out the window to see if there was any sign of his wayward friend.

As he waited, Tony remembering a conversation he'd had with Jethro a few weeks ago, while in Jethro's workshop. Never breaking the rhythm as he'd sanded a plank needed to repair the barn floor, Jethro had casually asked, "You going to keep that shoebox of a place you rent in DC?"

No, he wasn't, Tony had replied. As soon as his term in Congress was over, at the end of the year which was only five weeks away, he wouldn't need the tiny studio any more. "Problem is, I don't have anywhere else lined up." He'd sunk most of his money buying back half of the business he'd built and then sold, SafeZone, so he wasn't in a position to buy a house or even a condo near DC. Renting somewhere cheap was his only option, but at least he could visit Kelly Brook Farm at weekends.

Jethro had raised an eyebrow and asked, "Tell me when, and I'll drive over in the pickup."

"Pickup? What're you coming over for?"

Shaking his head and continuing with his sanding, Jethro had said, "Well, we've gotta lug all your fancy suits and whatever crap you've got, over here, don't we?"

His heart beating fast, and hardly believing that Jethro was asking him to move in with him, like really moving in, not just weekends, Tony had carefully asked, "You sure about this?"

Jethro's reply had been roll of his eyes and a sarcastic, "Either you move in, or Abby's gonna make me open a bed and breakfast, what with all those empty rooms upstairs."

Chuckling, Tony had said, "No, please don't put any B&B sign out. I…I want to move in with you, Jethro."

"You're okay if word gets out you're living with a man. Even if he is a grouchy old farmer?" Jethro had asked.

"But you're not old," Tony had replied with a teasing smile. "But yes, I can take it. Can we do it at the end of the month? Then I can commute from here. Sound good?"

"Sounds very good." Jethro had turned his head and met his eyes, smiling one of the biggest smiles Tony had ever seen on his handsome face. The thought of moving in here, at Jethro's invitation, was a big step to take, even if it was one that made him feel good inside. Very, very good, in fact. Tony had wondered then, and he still did, if the day he moved in permanently, they would be honest with each other and share his bed as a couple – none of this Jethro falling asleep next to him 'by mistake,' and avoiding each other's eyes the next morning when they discovered they had become intertwined like lovers in the night.

Tony sat in front of the fire in the living room and placed a call to his business partner, Parker Prentice. They discussed some of the more immediate aspects of the business that needed attention, went over details, and decided on a time for a face-to-face meeting. Tony was excited to get back into the business, and he liked working with Parker. The man had been one of the wilder of Tony's frat brothers, and although he still had a bit of that undisciplined behavior in him, Parker was also a motivated businessman who wanted nothing more than to make SafeZone a success.

When six o'clock rolled around, and Jethro still hadn't made an appearance, Tony checked out the fridge to see what they might have for dinner. After putting some potatoes, vegetables and cooked chicken in a frying pan on the stovetop, pouring chicken soup over the lot and leaving it to simmer, Tony put on a pot of coffee and started doing the dishes.

He was almost finished when he heard the door open. Jethro walked into the kitchen, looking drained. Tony was relieved that he was back, but was unsure what to say in the wake of the emotional parting. Knowing Jethro, he'd prefer that Tony didn't broach the subject. Unfortunately for Jethro, that wasn't Tony's way.

Tony rinsed the last plate and put it in the drainer. "I just made a fresh pot of coffee. You want some chicken and veggies, sort of a frying pan stew I got going, or I could whip you up an omelet…" He turned, drying his hands on a towel, and found Jethro just standing there, looking as if he'd lost his best friend. What do you say to a man who just said goodbye to a beloved animal whom he would most likely never see again?

But just as Tony said, "He's going to be fine," Jethro said tiredly, "You should go now, Tony. You need to leave."

There was a terrible air of finality about those words, as if was all settled that Tony should leave and not return, and it scared him. "No, that's okay. I have to keep an eye on the dinner, and the sheets are still in the dryer," Tony said, purposely misunderstanding Jethro.

"Just go," Jethro said sharply, turning away. "Go home!"

Tony sent a plea to the older man, and grabbed his arm. "C'mon, Jethro…"

"For once, can you just do as I ask, DiNozzo?" Jethro said loudly, his eyes flashing as he faced Tony.

It was the first time since the Merrills had driven up in their truck that Jethro had met Tony's eyes, and now he knew why the man had been avoiding looking directly at him. For once, Jethro was finding it impossible to keep his feelings hidden, and the sadness and utter loss, and Jethro's desperate attempt to keep those feelings locked up, was enough to make Tony throw caution to the wind. He drew Jethro into a hug, wrapping his arms around him.

"Don't," Jethro said, his voice rough, but he didn't do anything to extricate himself from Tony's hold.

Still holding onto Jethro, Tony leaned back enough to study his face. "I'll leave, Jethro, because you ask me, but I want you to know it's under duress. I don't want to go, and you know why? Because this is my home. And I'm not saying that because I love the house and the horses, and all of Kelly Brook Farm, or because I have a wonderful room upstairs that you decorated just for me. It's not even because I'm pitiful and don't have anywhere else to go – which I don't, right now, unless you count the studio rental – but this is my home because you took me in when I was down, and you made this a home for me." Tony pressed his lips to Jethro's hair and reluctantly released him. "You sure you don't want me to stay?"

Jethro gave a slight shake of his head, averting his gaze.

Tony sighed. He hated this. It felt wrong, like he was deserting the man, but he'd said he would leave, so he would. For now. "Call me if you need anything, okay?" Tony said, then quickly headed for the back door, scooping up his car keys and go-bag on his way past. He hated getting in his car, hated driving up the driveway, hated that he had to get out to open the gate and drive through. He wanted to stay, damn it! Jethro needed him, even if he was too stubborn to admit it, but Tony knew when not to push, and when Jethro was stubborn, he became an impenetrable wall.

After driving through the gate, Tony stopped the car and got out to close it behind him so any horses, should they ever break loose, couldn't get far. He looked back at the old farmhouse with its porch lamp shining brightly, and the glimmer of light emanating from the kitchen window. Sighing, he got back in his car with a heavy heart, and started down the road. He hadn't driven half a mile when his cell phone rang. Not even looking at the caller ID, Tony answered, "DiNozzo."

There was silence on the line, and just as Tony was about to hang up he heard a sigh, and he knew it was Jethro.

"I'm…I'm calling," Jethro said, his voice almost too quiet to hear.

"Uh, yeah, I figured that much out," Tony said, wondering what was going on.

"You said to call you," said Jethro, sounding annoyed.

"Okaaaay." Tony still wasn't sure what Jethro wanted.

"If I need anything."

"So…what do you need?"

"For God's sake, DiNozzo, get the hell back here," Jethro said loudly.

Tony didn't need to be told twice. He almost took out a neighbor's mailbox as he executed a tight turn, tires squealing.

~ • ~ ~ • ~ ~ • ~