RWBY is owned by Rooster Teeth. If it belonged to me, Team RWBY would attend more orgies. And I just realized I've established a pattern of making pervy comments at the beginning of every even-numbered chapter. I think I'll keep it up.

Chapter 6

TWEEEEEEEEEEEET!

"Gaaah!" Weiss screamed, a perfectly reasonable reaction to somebody blowing a whistle into her ear when she had been sleeping. The heiress tumbled off her bed and onto the ground, then looked up at the source of the noise: Her new partner and leader, Ruby.

"Good morning, Team RWBY!" the red reaper shouted cheerfully. Weiss resisted the urge to strangle her, but only barely.

"What the fucking fuck is wrong with you?!" Weiss demanded, rubbing her ear.

"Oh, did I wake you up? Well it serves you right for not warning us you snore like an Ursa with a sinus condition." Ruby retorted.

"I do not snore!"

Ruby didn't respond verbally; she simply took out her scroll and showed Weiss the little "movie" she had shot last night. It was a close up of the Schnee heiress asleep, drooling on her pillow and loudly snoring. To Weiss's annoyance, it did, indeed, sound like an Ursa with a sinus condition.

"I'm thinking of making it my ringtone," Blake said, smirking. She and Yang were walking into the newly formed team's dorm, each carrying boxes and suitcases.

"Well, enough about that," Ruby said, "right now we've got our first order of business!"

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Weiss demanded.

"Decorating!" Yang replied.

"We still have to unpack," Blake stated. As soon as she said that, one of the suitcases she was carrying opened, spilling its contents on the floor. "…and clean," she added.

A quick montage later, and the four girls stood back and admired their handiwork. In one corner, there was Ruby's miniature workshop, weapons parts already strewn haphazardly over it, and a red and black electric guitar. In another corner, there were whole cabinets full of Dust (with the Schnee logo, of course), as well as a small Dust laboratory. In another corner, there was a large bookshelf filled with, well, books, as well as a stand with that largest book any of the girls had ever seen. Blake had dubbed it her manifesto. There was also a dartboard with a picture of somebody with a White Fang mask and red and black hair. (When asked about it, Blake had said that his name was Adam, he was a pussy, and that was all they needed to know.) And in the last corner, there was Yang's numerous sex-toys and a fully stocked minibar. Unfortunately, all that stuff left precious little room for their beds.

"This isn't going to work," Blake said.

"Oh, gee, our beds bunched up together because our shit takes up too much room isn't going to work?" Weiss spoke up, "and here I was thinking it was fucking ideal."

"Do you have to be a wiseass all the time?!" Blake snapped.

"I'd say she's more like a Weiss-ass!" Yang said with her trademark shit-eating grin. Everybody groaned.

"How about we replace the beds with bunk beds?" Ruby asked.

"That doesn't sound like a disaster waiting to happen or anything," Weiss commented.

"It sure doesn't!" Yang said, oblivious (or perhaps uncaring) to her teammate's sarcasm. "Let's do it!" She thought for a moment. "Wow, usually I say that phrase in a completely different context."

After "converting" their beds into bunk beds, Ruby announced, "Now, for our next order of business: classes!" She looked at a schedule in a binder and continued: "We've all got our first class together at nine…"

"Nine o'clock?!" Weiss interrupted. "That's in five minutes, you fucking idiot!" With that, she took off.

"Uh… to class!" Ruby said before following Weiss, with Yang and Blake close behind her.

"Monsters! Demons! Prowlers of the night!" Professor Peter Port announced. "The creatures of Grimm are known by many names. But I refer to them only as Prey!" He paused before continuing: "And you will too after you graduate from this prestigious academy!" He continued to drone on, oblivious to the fact that nobody was paying attention. They were all under the spell of his mustache.

It- It's magnificent!

What a mustache!

It's like his upper lip was blessed by the heavens themselves…

Only two people were immune. One of them was Weiss, due to the fact that her father had a fairly awesome 'stache himself. Instead, she was struck by now hammy the Professor was. He's almost as big of a ham as Winter, she thought. Almost. She glanced at the only other person not affected by the glory of Port's mustache: one Ruby Rose, whose immunity was due to her being sound asleep. She rolled her eyes. If she wants to fail, then that's her business. She turned her attention back to Port, who was wrapping up a long-winded story about his past.

"The moral of this story," he said, completely unaware nobody knew what his story had been, "a true huntsman must be honorable, strategic, well-educated, and wise. So, who among you thinks yourself to be the embodiment of these traits?"

"I do, sir!" Weiss spoke up.

"Well then," Port replied, "care to prove it?"

After a quick change out of her school uniform, Weiss held up Myrtenaster. Port stood in front of a huge cage with a locked door and hefted his blunderbuss. Why would he have the axe blades on the handle? Weiss wondered.

"Go Weiss!" Yang cheered. "While you were changing, I bet Blake fifty Lien that you'd win!"

"Keep in mind, you're representing Team RWBY!" Ruby added.

"Maybe if I search long and hard enough, I'll find some fucks to give about that." Weiss retorted. "But I doubt it."

Port chopped down on the cage's lock, and the door flew open, a particularly nasty-looking Borbatusk jumping out. Spotting Weiss, the pig-like Grimm charged. The Schnee heiress easily dodged it, scoring a hit on the Borbatusk's flank while she did so. It didn't do any damage, but it did anger it. The Borbatusk attempted to charge several more times, only for its nimble opponent to dodge each time, getting multiple hits on it with Myrtenaster. Now pissed off to no end, the Borbatusk prepared its rolling attack, rocketing towards Weiss with enough force to shatter her Aura (and her bones) with one hit… only to ricochet off of a barrier glyph. Weiss jumped up, conjuring a black glyph in the air, which she jumped off of right at the downed Grimm, stabbing her sword deep into its belly. The Borbatusk squealed for a bit before dying.

"Bravo! Bravo!" Port said. "I can tell we're in the presence of a true Huntress in training!"

Weiss smirked. "Fuck yes, you are," she muttered.

After class, the team met back at their dorm, to prepare for their other classes. "Weiss," Ruby spoke up, "that was fucking awesome." And sexy, she silently added.

Weiss preened under the flattery. "I know," she smugly replied.

"You know," Blake said as she handed a grinning Yang fifty Lien, "I figured you'd be pissed about not being the leader."

Weiss shrugged. "Yeah, well, what am I going to do, bitch about it? Like that would do anything."

None of her teammates failed to notice that Weiss hadn't denied what Blake said.

End of Chapter 6

As you may have noticed, every chapter (except for Chapter 1) I've had Weiss say a different variation on the phrase "I don't give a fuck." If any of you have suggestions for more ways to say it, feel free to share them.