Sebastian closed his eyes and his lashes brushed Ciel's cheek, who was trembling but leaning closer all the same. The butler's hand cupped the back of his neck and drew him in. Ciel parted his lips, the pounding of his heart reaching a crescendo, and-"

"Ciel, darling?"

He stumbled to his feet, almost falling into floor as his bad leg wobbled in protest. He ran straight into Rachel as she entered the room. She laughed and put her hands on his shoulders to steady him. "There's no need to be shy, dear, please come rejoin the festivities."

"Of course, my apologies."

"Not at all." Her smile stayed in place as she put her arm around his shoulders and guided him out of the room.

He made it a point not to look back but he felt eyes on him nonetheless. His whole body seemed to be on fire. He was alight with embarrassment, shock at his own actions, and worst of all, a twinge of disappointment. He brushed himself off as though there might be physical evidence of what had almost transgressed. Breathing required more effort than usual but he tried his best to keep it even, both to avoid Rachel growing suspicious and because his asthma still flared up at the worst possible times.

Vincent extended his hand to Rachel when they returned to ballroom and together, the three of them ascended the stairs. Ciel made to go to the second floor but his parents stopped on the landing that overlooked the main hell. Vincent tapped the side of his glass, and as the guests fell silent and turned their attention to the family, Ciel prayed to a God he didn't have much faith in to open a hole to swallow him. Vincent began to make a speech about the blessing of Ciel entering their life. Rachel was saying how she knew at first sight they had found their son but as they room erupted into applause all Ciel could hear was cruel laughter, and the faces of the guests morphed into masked men with cold eyes.

The effort to breathe became more than he was capable of. He started to gasp for air as though someone had siphoned every bit of it from his lungs. A white hand closed on his shoulder, but oddly it did not become the violent hands of his memory, it simply remained the gloved hand of his butler. Sebastian knelt and leaned close to Ciel's ear.

"You must breathe, my lord. I know their stares make you uneasy but you will be subjected to far more of their attention if they see you struggling to breathe."

Ciel knew he was right, but his heart was racing and his mouth had gone dry. He shook his head to say he couldn't do it but Sebastian's hand squeezed his shoulder.

"Breathe with me. Inhale as I inhale, and only exhale when I do. That's good. Now, all that clapping is for you. Inhale as you bow and exhale as you stand. Very good, young master. You see? It's over now."

Ciel had closed his eye to focus on the sound of Sebastian's voice and when he opened it, the crowd at the bottom of the stairs had started to disperse. He glanced sideways but his parents didn't seem to have overheard the exchange. He turned his attention back to Sebastian, who was talking into his ear again, sending the best and worst of chills down his back.

"Go on to your chambers. I'll tell the lord and lady that the festivities tired you, and you wished to go to bed early."

"Thank you."

He was still weary of Sebastian but for the time being he was glad for his help and his strong, steady presence. While Vincent was speaking to his mother, Ciel took to the stairs as quickly as his aching leg would allow. He heard Sebastian speaking to his parents until he reached the hall and their voices died away. The corridor was wonderfully quiet. The servants were attending the party and the guests were being confined to the main hall so it was a peaceful walk to his bedchambers.

He removed his stuffy dress clothes. The crackling fire combated the chill, allowing him to sit on the bed for a moment, unclothed without getting cold. He reached back to the raised skin on his back. Perhaps Sebastian had touched it by coincidence, but he had reached for it with such purpose that such an explanation was unlikely. The mark of the noble beast...as if there was anything noble about overpowering a child. He shivered. The coldness had nothing to do with the temperature of the room but he still needed to dress for bed.

He sat back against the headboard in his most comfortable gown, blankets pulled to his waist. He dozed on and off until there was a knock on the door and Sebastian came in. His stomach did somersaults as the tea cup was placed in his hands. Sebastian said his goodnights and made to leave, but Ciel found himself saying, "Would you care to join me for a bit?"

"It would be my greatest pleasure."

Sebastian sat on the end of Ciel's bed and said, "You did well out there. You kept your composure and stayed strong, I could easily mistake you for a born Phantomhive."

"Perhaps that would be true, except I was born to a prostitute and the identity of my father is unknown." At the butler's raised brows, he said, "I stole my file from Mr. Spears' office once. I was curious."

Sebastian chuckled. "Of course."

They drew closer the longer they talked and soon Ciel was sitting with his feet in Sebastian's lap, who was giving them a heavenly massage while they made conversation about their lives. Sebastian had been a servant for the duration of his and had joined the Phantomhive household ten months earlier. He pressed his thumb into Ciel's arch while listening to stories of the orphanage, and seemed to find many of them entertaining.

Ciel's discomfort at their encounter in the kitchen began to wear away as they talked long into the night. Before long Sebastian's shoes were on the floor and they were laying with their heads on opposite ends of the bed, Sebastian's feet propped on Ciel's pillow and Ciel discovered that the length of his body was not much more than that of Sebastian's legs. He found himself fingering the cuff of the butler's trousers as he spoke, not really noticing that he was doing so. The candle burned down at some point and they spoke into the darkness.

They had been alone for hours and Sebastian made no further advances on him. He was glad he could enjoy the butler's companionship without the usual tension it presented, though he was curious as to why Sebastian had not taken advantage of their closeness in some way.

"Sebastian?"

"Yes, my lord?"

"Thank you."

"For what?"

He was glad the butler couldn't see his face redden in the darkness. "Helping me earlier. I am not accustomed to being presented in front of large groups of people, I suppose I have a touch of social anxiety."

"If you would forgive my saying so, I don't believe that to be the reason for your anxiety."

Ciel's heart skipped. Once more, he doubted Sebastian had found the brand on his ribs by accident. "What do you believe, then?"

"That you have suffered. It had taken the bright, ordinary soul of a child and contorted it into a complex, writhing mass of black hatred. I see it burn within you as surely as I can watch the embers burn down in the fireplace. Stoke those flames and I can only imagine the inferno you would become, my lord."

"I seem quite damaged to you, then."

"Don't sound disheartened, I find myself infatuated with that beautifully twisted soul you have. I have never seen another like it."

"You speak about it as though it's an object."

Sebastian laughed but there was little humor to it. "I told you I was a man of few secrets, not of none."

Ciel had a lot to think about as he fell asleep. Sebastian seemed to act as a buffer against the vivid nightmares that plagued him, reducing them to hazy images that drifted through his mind but never stayed long enough to wake him. His memories were spliced by flashes of red eyes, a bloody knife and a vanishing wound, and an interrupted kiss. There was something growing clearer the longer his subconscious mind lingered over for Sebastian but before he could make sense of it, he was claimed by a dreamless sleep at last.