Chapter 5

Class started and it seemed Haruki didn't recognize me. He didn't even look my way. As I said before Haruki doesn't know about his other past, all he knows is what was implanted into this brain, which is rather strange....

Also, it seems the time was the next day, as in we were right where we should've been since what was being taught was what should've been taught today. However, none of this even mattered, even if was the right day, it wouldn't help me revert the world to what it used to be so this observation was really useless and a waste of my time.

As I said, classes were exactly the same, which meant that as before I wasn't able to listen attentively, my mind was filled with worries and questions that continued to bother me.

It wasn't simply Haruki's idiocy anymore, albeit not it was about how I would get my brother back. Meaning it was now about Haruhi's idiocy. Why couldn't I simply be worrying about simple school girl matters? What are simple schoolgirl worries for that matter... Aside from that, it leaves me with one question that I want answered: why do the Suzumiyas have to be so stupid? They both become bored too easily, the thing that they don't realize is that even if they found what they're searching for they'd only become bored of it within a day.

Kyon's behavior at school seemed rather similar to mine, his face, although directed at the teacher, didn't make it seem as if he was paying attention to the lecture in the slightest. His eyes met mine and I turned around to fake listening attentively. Maybe if I try hard enough I can, I told myself as my eyes looked at the bored where some characters were written. I should probably start taking notes, I told myself.

I can't take it! Damn it, why can't class be over sooner? I have to find out what's going on, damn it! I need to find someone with all the answers, and I know who I'll ask. But how, by now I know they won't be here, nobody I know will be here, what can I do? He's not here.... and even she's not here. Why can't someone be here? How can I solve a puzzle without all the pieces?

Maybe all the pieces are already here: Kyon, and all the Brigade members that belong to Haruhi's Brigade, Haruki, and me. I don't fit though.... am I not a piece? I don't belong...and neither does Haruki....

Haruki.... and me... I think I understand.... Yet I don't think I want to understand this time. My brother, and everyone else is gone... this is the only shot, even it is a long shot, I don't have a choice but to revert the world back to how it was for me and everyone I knew.

…

…..

Lunch came around later in the day, Haruki and Haruhi ran out of the classroom as soon as it did, leaving us with one question: what's going on? Anyway, I didn't have anyone to eat with... Kyon had already started scarfing down his food, and I already knew why, he had to go talk to someone. Someone who could help him, also, since he didn't ask me, he probably doesn't want me to come along. With that I started to eat by myself some of the girls around me saw this and invited me to eat with them, I politely declined that invitation simply because I didn't want to waste my time talking about what happened in yesterday's drama show, or some gossip about meaningless random things. No, I'd rather run some things through my mind than spend it talking to some peppy schoolgirls. I really didn't mind anyway since it's not like I'm going to stay here, so I can be a loner.

My meal went uninterrupted and when I finished my pleasant meal, I just sat there hoping suddenly everything around me would be like it was before, hoping Kyon would find a way to solve this mess. It really did seem like I wasn't involved in the slightest. This was just one of Kyon's many adventures not one of mine. When I get back, this should've of never transpired, so no one can know what I went through, this is only a passing moment for me.

The lunch break was coming to an end, Kyon barely made it back into the classroom as it did end leaving no time for me to ask him about what was happening. The only thing I've been doing is watching, Is that all I'm here to watch? What purpose would that serve?

…

Everything was so tedious and every passing moment I felt that time was going to stop, for some reason I felt that the next moment would never arrive and I'd be stuck in one place forever simply watching others have fun, while I sat out on what should've been my life. I didn't like the idea of this at all!

Still, Kyon's has to solve this... I can only hope he does so quickly. I'm used to that the Brigade already a change like this isn't what I wanted. If I could have Kyon, I guess it would be okay...but I'd miss them...

….

…...

After school, Before I had the chance to do anything, Haruhi grabbed Kyon by his necktie and dragged him out of the room as Haruki followed behind them with a grin plastered on his face, I was completely ignored.... what was left for me to do but to go home? If I showed up at the SOS Brigade's door, I might only end up being beaten up by Haruhi before I even had a chance to say something, and with everyone there, I can't let them know who I am... My senses told me to stay away no matter how much I wanted to go. With this, my routine had been broken, I was now living how someone else wanted me to... but I had no choice in the matter. I want to live life for myself, but I couldn't do that here. I guess I have to go home and go back to my old routine of nothing....

Should I take the bike though.... It's not mine, so I can't; I'd be breaking the law. It was annoying having to walk the whole way, but what could I do? I don't even have a cell phone anymore.

Every step I took seemed to get me no closer to my destination, my feet were only tiring themselves out, even when I arrived it wasn't where I wanted to go. This house no matter how much it looks like mine isn't mine. Nothing is mine in this world, not even my parents are the same as they used to be. I don't even have a room... where will I sleep tonight? If it was up to me, I really wouldn't mind sleeping with him, but that's not going to happen. I guess I'll probably get to know his sister somewhat since that's the only logical place for me to sleep, with another girl.

Why do I feel so down about this...it'll go back so put on a smile. Hah...if only it was that easy, I'd smile the entire time just like Itsuko. I really wouldn't mind seeing her smile right now, she's so fake, her life is nothing but a fabrication to simply make Haruki happy. I sort of understand how she truly feels now.

This painfulness of losing everything you had, of your life suddenly belonging to someone else, this isn't how life should be, and I won't take it sitting down. I'm going to figure this out and fix the problem myself. Kyon....may not need me, but I don't care I'll fix it before he does. I'll be the better me, I'll be a person who I can be proud of. None of the feeling sorry for myself crap, I'll make what I want happen even if I have to fight against this so called "God" I don't care, I'll live life for myself and not because of her selfishness. She didn't even need me anyway so why was I brought here? She's so stupid.

Chapter 5—End

A.N. It's actually sort of intersting how the ending came about for this entire story....