Hello. I am sorry it's been so long since I've last updated, I've been really busy. Thank you guys for sticking with me. So here is chapter 20.

Enjoy =)

Harry POV

When I get to my room, I go straight for my trunk and I pull out the Marauders Map. "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good." I recite, waving my wand over the blank paper. It reveals itself and I can see that Draco is up at the Astronomy Tower.

The place we had our first date of sorts, our first kiss. The place he... well I asked him to Hogs-Prom. I can't help but smile at those thoughts. He really is adorable.

So once again I find myself leaving Gryffindor Tower to find my boyfriend. Hopefully this time I don't run into Professor Snape. I step out of the portrait hole and stop looking left and right as though I were at traffic lights. After deciding that the coast is clear I make my way to the Astronomy Tower. I climb what seems like a hundred stairs to meet the dot on the map. I look around but don't see him. So I walk to the edge and look out.

I totally get why Draco likes it so much up here. The sun is setting behind the horizon and the sky is painted with oranges and pinks. I heard someone say once that if the sky is pink at sunset, then the following day will be sunny and nice. I wonder if it's true?

"It's beautiful isn't it." A familiar voice says from behind me, consequently pulling me out of my thoughts. I turn around to see Draco sitting against a wall, with his arm hanging over one leg and the other leg flat on the ground.

"Hey." I smile. "Yeah, it is beautiful. I see why you like it up here so much."

"I assume you didn't come up here for the view." He says, nodding to the map in my hand.

"Oh... yeah..." I blush, pulling out my wand. "Mischief managed." I say, putting it away.

I can feel my green snake watching me intently. "So why are you up here?" He asks.

I sit down opposite him, crossing my legs. "I was looking for you." I reply, taking his hands in mine.

"Why?"

His tone is sharp which worries me slightly. His mood changes are almost as drastic as Snape's. At least with Snape we know why, I just wish I knew how to make it better. "Because I care about you and I'm worried. I was talking to Myrtle earlier."

"Why were you talking to Myrtle?" He asks, trying to keep his voice from shaking. However it doesn't work.

"Hermione figured that it would be a good idea to ask her about how to force ghosts to move on." I pause for a second. "Who better to ask about ghost than a ghost, eh?" I say, with a slight laugh in hopes of lightening the mood a bit.

"I suppose that makes sense." The blonde replies, with a lighter tone. "Your friend Granger is a bright one I'll give her that."

I flash him a weak smile. "She's your friend too, you know."

"I guess." He tenses up again. "But if you tell her I said that I hex your balls off."

"I won't."

"Good."

"Draco, are you okay? You seem a little off."

He avoids my gaze. "I'm fine, just a little tired." He responds, standing up and walking closer to the edge.

That's when I notice the crimson tears dripping from his sleeve. "What's that?" I ask him.

He follows my gaze and cusses under his breath when he notices the blood. "Oh nothing." The blonde makes his way to the top of the staircase. "Look I have some assignments I need to finish up, so I'm gonna go."

"I know you cut yourself." I spit, before he reaches the fifth step down. His head shoots round and his eyes look terrified. He looks as though I am going to hurt him for hurting himself. The sight makes my heart bleed. "Myrtle told me about your pretty blade and the crying in the girls bathroom. It wasn't hard to put together."

As soon as I finish explaining Draco rushes over to me and wraps his arms around my waist. "Please don't hate me." He begs. I know he is crying because I can feel his tears soaking through my shirt, however I don't mind. Although I hate to see him in pain I cherish these moments, they make me feel closer to him.

I bring my arms around him, holding him close. "Of course I don't hate you. I love you and I'm really worried about you Draco. It's not good."

He pulls out of the hug. "I know and I'm sorry."

"Promise me you'll stop." I plead.

He shake his blonde head. "I can't promise you that because it's not that simple."

How can it not be that simple? You just stop hurting yourself. "Please Draco, promise me."

"I can't." He says, looking away.

I study him. He has his fringe hanging over his eyes like he is trying to hide behind it, and he as a firm grip on his own wrist. The one I assume he has recently harmed. "I don't understand." I confess, weakly. My voice full of defeat.

"Exactly!" The blonde throws back. "You don't understand. Your Harry bloody Potter, everyone loves you, everyone is there for you. You don't understand what it's like to have the entire school hate you. You don't understand what it's like to have not choice in doing terrible, unspeakable things or face your father's fist. You don't understand how it feels to loath yourself so much that you just want to die. You don't understand how it feels to have this stupid fucking mark that I just want to cut off, but can't. You don't understand how it feels to be alone. To worry that I'm gonna say something or do something and fuck everything off. That if you see the darkest part of me that you'll leave. What's the fucking point any way. Everyone leaves in the end."

So I know the human body is 97% water... I wonder what happens if you cry all that water out. I go to speak but choke on my emotions. "I... won't... ever... leave... you... Draco." I somehow manage to blubber.

"You say that now-"

"I won't. I love you, which is is why I want you to promise you'll stop cutting yourself. It's dangerous, you could die." I beg, interrupting him.

He stares at me with sad grey eyes. "I told you I can't, it's not that simple. It's like a drug and I'm hooked!"

"Fine." I say, rolling up my sleeve. Then I walk up to him and reach my hand in his wand pocket. I think he has figured out what I'm doing because he glares at me. I pull my hand out of his pocket and he seizes my wrist. In my hand is his razor blade, I kind of figured that's where he would hide it.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" Draco hisses.

"Well you said I don't understand, so this is me understanding." I reply, with a twisted grin. I pull my wrist free and I bring the blade to my clean and bare arm.

"Don't you fucking dare!" He threatens. "You have no idea what you are doing."

"I want to understand why you feel the need to do this."

"This isn't the way to go about it."

I ignore his pleas and drag the blade across my arm. "Shit!" I scream, as the cut begins to cry crimson tears.

"I told you not to!" Draco yells at me.

"Why do you like this? It hurts like hell."

Draco POV

My idiot boyfriend thought it would be a good idea to cut himself to try and understand why I do it. If his arm wasn't bleeding I'd fucking thump him. However he doesn't seem to be enjoying it at all, which is great. It means he isn't likely to do it again.

"Why do you like this? It hurts like hell." The red lion asks.

I roll my eyes. It's not like I didn't warn him. "Duh... That's why it is called 'self harm'. It's hardly gonna tickle."

"I suppose."

"Now give me my blade back." I demand, holding my hand out.

"Hell no!" Harry retorts. He walks to the edge of the tower and throws my blade away.

I would scream at him, but I have spares. Instead I take hold of his arm and I say a healing spell. The cut closes over and fades until his pale skin is once again clean. "Thanks." He says, with a weak smile. Then his gaze shifts to the dried blood on my own sleeve.

I follow his gaze and give him a reassuring smile. "Don't worry about it. I kind of like the scars." Harry then leads me over to one of the walls in the Astronomy Tower and we both sit against it, watching the sun go down. He puts his arm around me and I can feel him kiss the back of my head. I know we fight a lot but they always seem to end well. With the exception of a few weeks ago of course.

"Draco, please let all our fights end like this?" Harry asks.

I smile at his question. "Agreed."

"Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah."

"You don't have to answer. But why do you like the scars?"

"I don't really know, maybe it's something to do with being alive. I dunno." I admit, genuinely unsure myself. I suppose they are a reminder of my weakness, however they are also a reminder that I'm not dead. I've been to hell and back, and I survived. I think that's something to be proud of.

"Can I see them?" The Gryffindor asks, cautiously. I reluctantly nod my head, giving him permission to roll up my sleeves. As he does I feel my anxiety weigh on my chest, making it a little difficult to breath. I think he can tell I'm anxious because he places a comforting kiss on my cheek. I instantly relax a little and he proceeds. His soft fingers trace the various stages of cuts and scars. He whispers something I don't quite hear.

"Huh?" I ask.

"They are battle scars." He repeats. "With everything you've battled, your father in life, Voldemort and now Snape, and your father's ghost. Your scars are from battle and they prove how strong you really are."

"Huh... battle scars. I like that." I smile in response.

Harry then kisses both of my arms, including the dark mark, before rolling my sleeves back down. "Come on." He says, standing up and holding out his hand.

"Where are we going?" I ask, taking his hand.

"It's been a long day and it's getting late. We both need to get some sleep."

"I don't really want to be alone tonight." I confess.

"I wasn't planning on leaving you alone tonight."

I can't help but furrow my brows at his statement. "And how do you suppose that's going to work? Smarty pants."

"Do you still have my invisibility cloak in your room?"

"Why would your cloak be in my room?"

"I used it to sneak into Slytherin the night I found you. I was so busy making sure you stayed alive I forgot it. If you bring it out to me I can use it to sneak in again."

I nod and we leave the Astronomy Tower.

We walk down the halls towards the dungeons, hand in hand. Several students stare, a few whispering and giggling. Crabbe and Goyle shove us on their way past, not failing to call us faggots as they do. Even with all the negative attention Harry doesn't falter. That in itself encourages me to hold my head high as we walk.

We reach the dungeons and I go on into Slytherin, while Harry waits outside for me to get his cloak. I notice the common room is empty as I walk through to my room. Just as he said there is a peculiar looking cloak in a heap behind my door. I pick it up and go to him.

When we are both in my room with door locked behind us, my red lion begins to strip. "What are you doing?" I ask, a little afraid by what he might expect tonight.

"I don't want to sleep in my school clothes." He laughs. "Don't worry, I'm keeping my boxers and vest on."

I breath a sigh of relief. "Right, well I'm going to change in the bathroom." The Gryffindor nods, and climbs into the emerald double bed. I come out of the bathroom a few minutes later in my pyjamas, and I climb in beside him.

"How come you get a double bed?" He groans.

"There are perks to having your own room." I say, with a sly grin.

"Well... you deserve it." He replies. "Anyway, goodnight Draco."

I roll over on my side, facing the wall. I don't really deserve it, but I'm not going to tell him that. "Goodnight, Harry. I love you."

"I love you too." And with that, I allow dreamland to take me.

I know Draco and Harry fight quite a bit int this fanfic. But everytime they do the become that little bit closer and Draco is opening up more and more too.

I want to thank you guys again for sticking with me through this story.

Until the next chapter ;)