I'm so SORRY! My entire computer crashed and wouldn't even turn on so I could retrieve my files!!! I was afraid I would lose it all and have to start from scratch, but thankfully my dad saved all my files. Yay Dad! Okay, so I hit my 100 reviews mark and then went over!!! I was jumping for joy and can't thank you all enough for reading this story. It really makes me so happy! I want to hug you all! But enough of my mindless blather! On with the story!

GONE…?

Chapter 11- Final Resolve

Tohru's feet flew out from under her and she cried out, her arms flailing to catch herself as she fell. The car went safely by and here she lay, stunned but otherwise unharmed. A young man lay near her, breathing heavily.

"Nice save Kureno!" Uo called, shoving the bystanders aside so she could get to them. "Are you both all right?"

The young man looked up, and shoved himself off the ground. "Yeah. I'm all right. How about you?" he asked, turning to Tohru and reaching out a hand to help her up.

"I… I'm fine. Thank you for saving me," Tohru replied. For some reason, this man looked strangely familiar.

"No problem," he answered. Then Uo was there, and she pulled Tohru into a hug.

"You scared me!" she told her friend. "Didn't Kyoko ever tell you to look both ways first? You nearly gave me a heart attack! If something happened to you, I don't know what I'd do!"

"I'm all right, Uo! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to worry you!"

"What are you doing here, anyway?" she demanded, still clutching Tohru tightly to protect her from heavens knew what. "And you Kureno?"

Kureno answered first. "I came to see you. I got you a flower, but…" He looked back to the street with eyes lowered as he trailed off as if to imply that it even if it were still in the road, it would not be worthy.

Tohru had finally pried herself out of Uo's embrace and was now looking from Uo to this man Kureno. Suddenly, it hit her. "Kureno! Kureno Sohma?!?" she asked in shock, recognizing him at last.

"Huh? Tohru what are you talking about?" Uo asked, doing a double take between her best friend and her secret love.

He sighed, running a hand through his hair in a very Kyo-like manner. "Yes, yes. I'm a Sohma," he replied. Now it was Uo's turn to be shocked. "Tohru, you mean he's related to Prince Charming and Orangey? Seriously?"

"Who?" Kureno asked, confused. "Wait a minute," he added, looking at the crowd that was still gathered nearby. Uo caught his drift and suddenly turned toward the crowd with a sharp glare and yelled, "Go on! Show's over people, move along!" Glaring reproachfully at her, the crowd of people started to go their separate ways. "Do you think we can go someplace a little quieter so we can talk?" Kureno asked the girls then.

"Yeah, why don't we go to Suki Hana's down the road. Their teriyaki is to die for!" Uo answered, her stomach growling softly at the thought.

"Yeah, all right," Kureno said. "My treat."

"All right!" Uo cheered. "But seriously," she added as they walked, "are you related to Yuki and Kyo Sohma?"

"Yes," he said with a sigh, "but we're not too close."

"Kinda hard to get too close to those two. They're so distant. Tohru's the only one I know who can."

Tohru looked at the ground sheepishly. Kureno looked away. He had always gotten a positive feeling from Tohru Honda, though he did not know her well, as he was often kept apart from the other Sohmas and thus from her. Yet he simply couldn't hate her. Even though Akito despised her, he could not understand why. Akito was the only one against her. To Kureno, she seemed so sweet-natured and innocent. How could she be of any consequence to the Sohma family?

On his way to meet Uo, Kureno had stopped at the Sohma house and so he knew everything that had happened. He was ashamed that he had ever been forced to play a role in her attempted demise and even more so that no one could overrule their head of family. Secretly, Kureno was afraid for her. Afraid that she may try to find Yuki and Kyo. Afraid that someone may come after her again. Afraid that because Tohru was friends with Arisa he would never be able to see her again. Glancing at Tohru, he could see the pain in her eyes, the pain of losing someone dear. He said nothing to her. What could he say that no one else had already said?

Even when they were in the restaurant, the conversation was reserved. Finally Uo noticed something was up and asked suspiciously, "Tohru? Where are the other Sohmas today?"

"At their family estate," she replied lightly.

"Oh yeah? I bet it's huge."

Kureno spoke up, "It's not that big." He knew Arisa was a smart girl and would get to the root of the problem quickly, so he was doing his best to help Tohru with her excuse while leaving out any notice of Akito or the others.

The bill came and still Uo had not hit the nail directly on the head. However, Kureno knew she would probably speak out once he had taken his leave, and there would be nothing he could do to stop it coming. Not to mention the fact that, if Kureno was out too long, Akito might notice his absence. So, directly after lunch, he bid the girls goodbye and wandered off down the street, mentally wishing Tohru the best of luck to avoid the oncoming interrogation. Immediately, Uo turned to her friend and said, "All right, spill. What's got you so down in the dumps?"

"I'm not…upset," she said slowly, trying to convince herself this was the truth. "It's just… the Sohmas have been summoned to stay at the family estate for awhile and Shigure asked me to find some place to stay until they come home again," she lied, hoping that Uo would believe her.

For a moment Uo considered. "Why were they summoned?" she asked, glancing at Tohru to find a lie in her eyes.

"They… didn't say."

"Hmm…" Tohru had never been a good liar, and Uo knew very well she was hiding something, but for now she chose to ignore it. "Well then, it's settled. You can stay at my place for awhile."

"But I don't want to impose…"

"You're my best friend Tohru, you know you're not imposing on anyone, so don't worry. Listen, I've gotta work for another few hours, so why don't you go straight to my place and I'll see you when I get home, 'kay?" she suggested, fishing the keys out of her pocket, and placing them in Tohru's small hand.

"Yes. All right. Uo?" she said softly, her eyes shining. "Thank you so much. I'll make it up to you, I promise."

"Don't mention it," Uo replied with a small smile. Then Tohru turned and walked away, heading to Uo's apartment her head down in shame. She had just lied to her best friend in exchange for shelter. She was a fraud and a con and she knew it, but she would make it up to Uo somehow. Then maybe Uo would forgive her someday.

………………………………...

Tohru let herself into Uo's apartment, feeling very out of place. When she turned on the light, she found the place in shambles. Her eyes widened. There were clothes covering the couch and half the chair, the table was littered with papers and schoolbooks. There were boxes of filled with piles of random objects shoved in corners and crumbs on the floor. The bathroom was just as cluttered, and the bedroom was worse. The bed was unmade; magazines and clothes were piled on the ground. Glasses and other assorted dishes were on top of the dresser and the TV. It was like the Sohma house before Tohru had cleaned it up. Tohru smiled brightly. I know how I can make things up to her. I'll clean the apartment. Poor Uo's been so busy trying to balance school and a full time job, and then she has to pay rent and buy groceries. I'll bet she hasn't had time to clean. So, setting down her bags in a corner where they were out of the way, Tohru rolled up her sleeves and got to work.

When Uo arrived home three hours later, she thought at first that she may have walked into the wrong apartment. The kitchen was spotless and she could actually see the furniture. Tohru was standing over the stove, making something that smelled wonderful. "Welcome home!" she greeted her friend. "Dinner's almost ready!"

"Tohru, you did all of this?" Uo asked in amazement.

"Uh huh," she replied happily. "I told you I would repay you in some way. This was the only way I could think of."

"Aww, Tohru-kun!" Uo said, biting back tears at the thoughtlessness of her dear friend. "You're my best friend. You don't have to pay me back in any way. You can stay here as long as you need to."

"Oh, Uo-chan," Tohru replied, tears springing to her eyes too as she realized that she was truly homeless now and that, as much as she would have liked to stay with Uo, she couldn't stay here forever. There's no room for sadness, she thought, wishing at the same time that she could tell Uo everything. "You're so kind to me, Uo-chan. I'm so lucky to have a friend like you." Uo smiled in response, but she knew that there was something different about Tohru now. Something had changed, and it was starting to worry her.

Around three in the morning, Uo awoke with a start after a most peculiar dream about the Sohma boys. She knew there was some vague connection here somewhere having to do with everything that had happened the day before, but her mind was still muddled and sleepy, so she let the feeling pass, and tried to fall asleep. As her eyes drooped closed again, she could have sworn she heard a quiet sob from the living room where Tohru was sleeping.

School resumed the next day. Tohru had been looking forward to a day of routine, but even here she could find no peace. The day started out as natural as any other day, but slowly it got worse. Much as she tried to hide behind her optimistic smile, the whole world seemed bent on bringing her down. Hana was the first to notice the changes that were happening. "Where are the Sohmas?" she asked Tohru when she saw her arrive with Uo.

"Oh!!! Um, they had to go to their family estate!" Tohru said quickly, terrified that Hana might be able to read her thought waves or whatever it was that she did.

"Hmm," Hana said calmly, in her solemn manner. "The Yuki Sohma fans will not be pleased."

And indeed they were not pleased. During lunch break, they cornered Tohru when they found her alone in the classroom. "All right Honda, spill!" one of the girls said with an icy sharpness. "Where is Yuki-kun? You always come to school with him. It's kind of hard to miss. So what did you do with him?!?!"

"I, uh, I…" Tohru wanted to scream. To shout into the hallway, "Yuki-kun isn't coming back!" but she knew she couldn't and so she spluttered and stuttered out some random sentence, which seemed to appease to girls for the time being because they strode out of the room in a huff after a threat of, "You better be right about Yuki-kun or else!"

Completely confused, and having no recollection of what it was she had just said, Tohru grabbed her lunch and headed back out into the hallway to meet Uo and Hana. However, on her way down to the courtyard, Tohru spied a familiar face and dropped her bento box in surprise, spilling half of its contents on the floor. Walking in the opposite direction was none other than Hatsuharu Sohma. He strode right by her, ignoring her completely even though they were the only ones in the hallway. Tohru did not speak, but watched him walk right by silent and stony. She watched until he turned down another hallway and disappeared.

"Haru-san…" she whispered, and immediately the reality of the whole dilemma came back to her. Of course he wouldn't talk to her. He wasn't allowed to associate with her at all. He was deaf and blind to her like the subservient cow that he was so often ridiculed as. Slowly, her knees gave out as though the weight of the situation had suddenly quite literally been dropped on her shoulders, and not thinking of who might hear her, she cried out loud. Wet sobs of anguish from the pit of her heart came ringing out as she sat in front of the contents of her spilled bento box.

Around the corner, Hatsuharu Sohma leaned against the wall, breathing heavily. Damn, that was my chance. Why couldn't I talk to her? Do something to make her feel better about this? Say goodbye at least? Then he heard her cries from the hallway beyond, and he bit his lip to stop himself from shouting in a fit of unleashed wrath. He had made her cry without even a glance in her direction. He had made Tohru cry when all she had done for any of them was to make them laugh. Why did it have to be this way? Why did they always obey Akito even when they knew it was wrong? Inside, he could feel his Black-self rippling in anger. How dare Akito try to make him follow orders? He dodged into his empty classroom and with no other outlet in sight, proceeded to break everything within reach, letting Black Haru loose. His true self, known to the Sohmas as White Haru, faded into the background. He let his dark side take control. There was no Kyo or Yuki here to stop him now. He could let all the demonic tension break loose and nobody could hold him back. He could be free from this undetermined rage that was threatening to consume him! "Damn Akito!" cried Black Haru in fury, toppling a desk. "Who does Akito think he is? Akito's not God! If anything he's the fucking Devil himself! I'll kill that bastard!" The second story window shattered beneath the chair that had just been lobbed at it.

First it was Kana, then Kisa, and Rin, not to mention all the psychological damage Akito had inflicted on the rest of the Sohmas, but now the "head of house" was trying to tear everything apart by the seams! There was no Sohma family anymore. Everyone acts for themselves. No one had tried to save Hatori when Akito hurt him, no one but Shigure had tried to help. And when Yuki had been young, who had been there to save him from the dark room? And when Kyo had been locked away? When Tohru had been cast out of the lives of the Sohmas? Who was there to protect them? Who was here to save them now? Nobody. Nobody but their own damned selves. It was every man for himself and nobody was going to watch anyone else's back. They were cursed and they were doomed to be forever forsaken.

The door slid open behind him as Haru continued on his mad rampage. Momiji stood there, dressed in his school uniform, silently watching, without any sign of alarm, as Haru destroyed the classroom. It was actually several long minutes before Black Haru even turned around. "What do you want, kid?" he demanded impatiently.

Momiji just stared back at him through the saddest eyes Haru had ever seen and said, "Tohru… she was crying. I heard her… I saw her crying… I wanted to hug her, but… I can't. How come I can't Haru? Why does Akito have to be so unfair? I… I…" Tears fell from his soft brown eyes as he tried to hold them back.

This brought Haru back to himself. His dark side faded, unable to handle a sniveling little kid. "Miji," Haru said quietly, "there's nothing we can do." I just walked right by her. I couldn't say a word. Hatsuharu ran a frustrated hand through his multicolored hair. "It will be hard, but we'll just have to bear it for now. We'll get her back. I promise we will find a way. We'll break the Curse and bring Akito down!"

"Mm hmm," Momiji agreed, wiping his eyes. Then he managed a weak laugh and said, "You don't look like you were handling this very well Haru." He indicated the war zone that had been a classroom only moments ago.

"It wasn't me," he said casually, sliding his hands into his pockets as he strolled out of the classroom followed closely by Momiji.

During the time the Sohmas had spent in the classroom, Tohru had finally gotten a hold of herself. "I can't let them see me like this," she told herself, thinking of Haru and the others. "I don't want them to think me ungrateful or pitiful when they've done so much for me."

She got up, leaving her lunch on the floor, and went into the girls bathroom. "Besides," she added, "they have more right to cry than I do. I can't keep being sad for myself. I've got to find a way to help them. They are more important than I am right now. They need my help and I'll do my best to help them in any way I can." She wiped away the last of her tears and was amazed at her reflection. Replacing the optimistic and clumsy girl from before, was the image of a determined and fearless young woman. That's right, she thought. That's who I have to be. She straightened her shoulders and turned away from the mirror. I can't fumble around anymore. Smiling won't save anyone. Not this time. Now I need to be brave.

………………………………...

A week passed. Tohru was seemingly herself again and her confusion of before had vanished. That is not to say that she had forgotten about the Sohmas. She thought of them every waking moment and often she saw them in her muddled dreams, but after the girl had made up her mind to save the Sohmas from Akito, she had decided that in order to do so, she must break the Curse of the Zodiac. So it was with this thought embedded in her mind, that she drew her strength and comfort. She would help the Sohmas or die trying.

Her friends were relieved to see Tohru back to her cheerful self, but they knew that something was amiss. At least, Saki Hanajima knew. Whenever she saw her dear friend instead of waves of happiness or well being, she could detect a stronger presence lurking there. At first she passed it off as nothing, a fluke or something, but each day that presence became more powerful. To Hana, it felt like an emotion somewhere between anger and unwavering power, but she had never sensed this form of it in Tohru before. It was different, and that was the only way to describe it. Not like the Sohma boys' different, just… different.

And speaking of the Sohma boys, nobody had seen or heard from Kyo or Yuki in over a week. They hadn't come to school, Yuki hadn't been to the Student Council Meetings, and strangely enough, Hatsuharu and Momiji hadn't been seen either since the day that Tohru had seen Haru in the hallway. There were hundreds of different rumors floating around the school about where they had gotten to. The Prince Yuki Fan Club was in hysterics, and it was only thanks to Hana and Uo that they left Tohru alone. Somehow, the snide remarks didn't phase her anymore. Each mention of the Sohmas made her more anxious to take action. The only problem was, she didn't know how. Instead of doing homework at night while Uo was at work, Tohru had been poring over all the books on Zodiac mythology that she had been able to get her hands on. She had only read the Chinese and Japanese tales thus far, but there were so many different variations of the tale, and every little piece counted now. In many stories, the Cat was left out entirely. These pages she ignored. If there was no Cat, then there was no Zodiac as far as she was concerned. The Curse revolved around the Cat, that much she knew. Without the Cat, there wouldn't have been a story. Without Kyo there was no hope. He was the key, but she didn't know why. One night after looking over a new book and being unable to find any new leads, Tohru slammed the book shut. "This isn't working," she moaned, resting her head on the smooth cover. "Oh, I wish I had asked Shigure more about the Curse when I had the chance."

Who else could she ask? She had already talked with Kazuma, and to no avail and Isuzu would reveal no information, claiming that there was none. Now she wasn't allowed to come in contact with any of the Sohmas. They would get hurt if she tried, but who else could she turn to? Who else could give her the advice she needed or the extra push to keep her going in the right direction? Who of the Sohmas could she even find outside the estate? Two names came to mind. Ayame and Kureno. She couldn't go to Shigure because she knew that his house was most likely being watched. Ayame would be glad to help, she was sure, but she wasn't certain he could keep quiet about it for long. Kureno, however, would be hard to find. She knew he lived Inside, but she had never been able to find his house there and more often had seen him outside of the estate. Hmm. What to do? Deciding that Kureno would have to be her starting point, Tohru believed she should ask Uo if she knew Kureno's telephone number so she could contact him. Yes, that would be the best plan. It would be risky, especially since she was disobeying Akito and breaking her promise not to meddle in the affairs of the Sohmas, but she was in too deep to back out now. So she stood up, gathered her books together unable to sit for a moment longer, and, carefully locking the door behind her, she set out into the night.

………………………………...

A soft light glowed from the corner of the room where a young woman sat with a needle and thread. The material she was working on was a burnt autumn orange color that seemed to glow of its own accord in the dim lighting. Deftly she moved her needle in and out of the felt, yet her mind wandered. Oh Kyo… why does it have to be this way? Why should you be locked away when you didn't do anything wrong… The needle quivered to a halt, trapped in the material, but Kagura Sohma took no notice of it. Suddenly an idea had begun to emerge from the recesses of her imagination and without a moment's hesitation she stood and dashed out of the room leaving her sewing materials scattered on the floor behind her.

A good long chapter for you all! I'm actually shocked at all the twists and turns that this story is taking. It's so complex! That's why it's my favorite story I've written thus far! Write me more lovely reviews (or critical reviews as the case might be!) and thank you for being so patient with me as I sorted out my computer issues!